Scan barcode
maddsienicole's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
hopeful
inspiring
sad
medium-paced
3.75
sreviti's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
reflective
4.0
A bit slow in the beginning but it was truly a roller coaster of emotions
kathytreece's review against another edition
emotional
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
5.0
Enjoyed reading very much. And glad to read an author who is a University of Illinois alum.
the_cat_on_a_bookcase's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
informative
reflective
sad
tense
medium-paced
4.25
This memoir was a book club read for this month and is about a pair of sisters and a neighbor who becomes like a sister to them. They journey through many obstacles that come with racial & socio-economic factors with some tragedy & healing intertwined.
This was a beautifully written memoir that I sometimes forgot was nonfiction (in the best way!). Sometimes truth really is stranger than fiction. I appreciated the nuance the author was able to capture about the justice system, reconciliation, and drug abuse. This is definitely a book to read trigger warnings for prior to reading. I loved the way the author told her story!
This was a beautifully written memoir that I sometimes forgot was nonfiction (in the best way!). Sometimes truth really is stranger than fiction. I appreciated the nuance the author was able to capture about the justice system, reconciliation, and drug abuse. This is definitely a book to read trigger warnings for prior to reading. I loved the way the author told her story!
nkpeters's review against another edition
4.0
I loved this book so much! Having just moved to Chicago, I loved reading about Chicago history, African American history, and Dawn's story specifically. She is a great writer, and this memoir included a lot of reflection that other memoirs (that I've recently read) have not included. Highly recommend this book!
mroemmich's review
4.0
I cared deeply about the people and remained engaged from beginning to end. Good paging, compelling narrative.
brennieree33's review
3.0
This was a wonderful book about the impact of choices and surroundings. It looks at the outcomes of three girls: Dawn, her sister Kim, and her friend Debra. Their stories hit me so hard, and I just wanted to hug all three girls the whole time. It speaks of the hurt that drugs cause to families, and the ways that people can move past it if they really, truly try. A beautiful memoir.
~353 pages
TW: miscarriage, abortion, drugs, alcohol, grief, death, hospitals, mentions of suicide, prison, murder, gun violence,
Rep: black
- "She asked me to play a game where I'd jump on her [pregnant] stomach." Holy SHIT that's dark. That's awful that she felt she needed to go to that point to protect herself and her existing children.
- "I ain't holding anything bigger than my dick" is my new catchphrase omg
- "She's the prettiest corpse I've ever seen in my life." ....okay.
- I'm so glad about Debra. I'm so glad that she got forgiveness and got out. And I'm sad that Kim couldn't, even though she tried.
- I'm glad that Dawn realized that she couldn't live wit David even if they weren't screaming or abused. They'd just outgrown each other, and that's okay.
- The two talking around how they like vacuum wrapped mice better than live ones made me snort so hard omg
Good Quotes
- "Mom loved her [Debra] because she rescued my childhood. I loved her because she rescued me."
- "'Just wait,' she begged, and it was the only time she begged."
- "Maybe she is a screwup. That doesn't mean she has to stay that way. That doesn't mean she can't change."
- "I wanted to write about people rather than pathologies. I wanted to explain how their hopes and dreams and life prospects were shaped by disparaties and inequities. I was drawn to resilient people who managed to do extraordinary things with nearly nothing. People who changed their lives despite seemingly impossible odds."
- "White male priviledge. Acting as if the right combination of rage, desperation, hopelessness, drugs - couldn't land you in a place you never dreamed. Of course it could have been me. Life gives us no guarantees."
- "Violence has a residue. The way it floods your pores, and insinuates itself, causing a molecular mutation."
- "I used to believe that the hardest thing you could do is watch, even from afar, as a friend destroyed herself. But it's equally hard watching that friend rebuild... We all make mistakes. We all make good and bad choices. Life can change in an instant; and sometimes we avoid peril, not because of any series of things we've done perfectly, but by a grace far bigger than our own steps and missteps."
- "I never thought I could feel anything for anyone who committed murder, but this story changed that. If the mother of the victim could forgive, who are we to ask why, and not forgive?"
- "I couldn't fathom another way a person learns to open up about such shame and heartbreak, without having been offered some degree of grace."
- "We try to drill down to what happened to each woman, rather than say, 'What's wrong with you?' We try to frame it as, 'What happened to you?' 'That's huge... it lets them know they are not inherently bad, even though they're here because they did something bad...'And it says, 'Now let's try to figure out who you really are. Let's surround you with people who will listen to you and support you. We all need people."
- "People reading her story just saw her as being broken; they didn't take into account that we all are broken. We are nicked and chipped, bruised and battered. Like my grandmother's glass figurines, we position ourselves to hide our defects. We learn how to move forward."
~353 pages
TW: miscarriage, abortion, drugs, alcohol, grief, death, hospitals, mentions of suicide, prison, murder, gun violence,
Rep: black
Spoiler
- "She asked me to play a game where I'd jump on her [pregnant] stomach." Holy SHIT that's dark. That's awful that she felt she needed to go to that point to protect herself and her existing children.
- "I ain't holding anything bigger than my dick" is my new catchphrase omg
- "She's the prettiest corpse I've ever seen in my life." ....okay.
- I'm so glad about Debra. I'm so glad that she got forgiveness and got out. And I'm sad that Kim couldn't, even though she tried.
- I'm glad that Dawn realized that she couldn't live wit David even if they weren't screaming or abused. They'd just outgrown each other, and that's okay.
- The two talking around how they like vacuum wrapped mice better than live ones made me snort so hard omg
Good Quotes
Spoiler
- "Mom loved her [Debra] because she rescued my childhood. I loved her because she rescued me."
- "'Just wait,' she begged, and it was the only time she begged."
- "Maybe she is a screwup. That doesn't mean she has to stay that way. That doesn't mean she can't change."
- "I wanted to write about people rather than pathologies. I wanted to explain how their hopes and dreams and life prospects were shaped by disparaties and inequities. I was drawn to resilient people who managed to do extraordinary things with nearly nothing. People who changed their lives despite seemingly impossible odds."
- "White male priviledge. Acting as if the right combination of rage, desperation, hopelessness, drugs - couldn't land you in a place you never dreamed. Of course it could have been me. Life gives us no guarantees."
- "Violence has a residue. The way it floods your pores, and insinuates itself, causing a molecular mutation."
- "I used to believe that the hardest thing you could do is watch, even from afar, as a friend destroyed herself. But it's equally hard watching that friend rebuild... We all make mistakes. We all make good and bad choices. Life can change in an instant; and sometimes we avoid peril, not because of any series of things we've done perfectly, but by a grace far bigger than our own steps and missteps."
- "I never thought I could feel anything for anyone who committed murder, but this story changed that. If the mother of the victim could forgive, who are we to ask why, and not forgive?"
- "I couldn't fathom another way a person learns to open up about such shame and heartbreak, without having been offered some degree of grace."
- "We try to drill down to what happened to each woman, rather than say, 'What's wrong with you?' We try to frame it as, 'What happened to you?' 'That's huge... it lets them know they are not inherently bad, even though they're here because they did something bad...'And it says, 'Now let's try to figure out who you really are. Let's surround you with people who will listen to you and support you. We all need people."
- "People reading her story just saw her as being broken; they didn't take into account that we all are broken. We are nicked and chipped, bruised and battered. Like my grandmother's glass figurines, we position ourselves to hide our defects. We learn how to move forward."
dreaming_ace's review against another edition
5.0
This is a story that can not be summarized easily. It is a heavy book that makes you consider the choices you had, the second chances you were given, the paths the people in your life took, and just how uncertain life can be. I am glad I read it as one of the books I read for Black History Month because it gives you a lot to think about. There are no easy answers when it comes to living life.