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ghostlyprince's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
2.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Panic attacks/disorders, Grief, Suicidal thoughts, Abandonment, Sexism, Suicide, Suicide attempt, Addiction, Toxic relationship, and Misogyny
Moderate: Physical abuse, Ableism, Child abuse, and Racism
Minor: Forced institutionalization, Eating disorder, and Vomit
herceia's review against another edition
dark
emotional
reflective
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
It took me a second to get into it but I’m really glad so stayed. The narrative is lovely and simple and very relatable to me, and I felt that journey and could empathize with it. At times it made me furious, bc I could detect the patterns of self destruction, but I always felt more empathy than judgment, which was nice. It’s a high school journey that I’m familiar with, and it really hit home.
Content Warnings
Moderate: Suicide attempt, Panic attacks/disorders, and Mental illness
megloveswords12's review
challenging
dark
emotional
hopeful
reflective
relaxing
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Child abuse, Toxic relationship, Panic attacks/disorders, Emotional abuse, Suicide attempt, Suicide, and Suicidal thoughts
half_bloodreader's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
tense
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Asian & pansexual rep
"I like to think it wouldn't have changed anything, that I understood then all the shortcomings of remorse and how impotent it is against the past. I like to think I recognized that you don't have to tell yourself things are fine to make it easier on another person, and that you don't have to turn your heart toward men who are suffering when they've brought it on themselves.
But probably that isn't true of me. After all, I would, at that point, have forgiven my own father everything on exchange for something as small as a phone call."
Raw hard-hitting read told from the present looking back at the past. With this more informed perspective on history, the mc is able to analyse certain moments differently, notice the tipping point for changes, wonder.
During my reading, I needed to take breaks to allow myself to feel everything this book elicited from me.
Covers so many topics, there's so much to unpack:
- mental health
- Beth is biracial and struggles with feeling not Asian enough
- Family pressure when it comes to studies & careers
- Women making themselves small for men
- Above all, friendship
- mental health
- Beth is biracial and struggles with feeling not Asian enough
- Family pressure when it comes to studies & careers
- Women making themselves small for men
- Above all, friendship
"What would it be like to admit that aloud - that you were angry, that the day had worn on you, to say those things, and to feel them, without worrying how they might look to whoever you were talking to? To let the ugly emotions you harbored, your anger and dissatisfaction and irritation, seep into your words without censoring them."
Beth's relationship with her absent father affects everything in her life, her shortcomings, insecurities and feelings of inadequacy stemming from it. She clearly has abandonment issues to the point she studied what the patriarchal society wants from women, trying to make herself accommodating to everyone. So she won't be left behind again.
She is extremely unfair towards her mother, blaming her for the divorce, hurting a lovely relationship she could have. That was where she had me angry and lacking sympathy. So ungrateful to the one who is so giving and works hard for her.
She will learn.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Child abuse and Panic attacks/disorders
Moderate: Racism and Suicide attempt
amandalorianxo's review
challenging
emotional
sad
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
I don’t even know where to begin but I’m looking forward to the next novel that Kelly Gilbert writes. The is novel follows five Asian American teens as they navigate their senior year. Unfortunately, Jason is having a particularly challenging year and it shakes the dynamic of the group. Beth, unfortunately due to her upbringing and her dad leaving the family, thinks that the only way to make sure Jason remains ok is for the group to be together. But she quickly realizes that no matter how selfless you portray yourself, it doesn’t mean other people are going to imitate your selflessness. This struck a chord with me, deeper than I originally thought, because I had two students during my time as a teacher attempt to unalive themselves (off campus.) It’s heartbreaking when you don’t know about or aren’t fully supportive of the resources provided. Gilbert wrote all of her characters in a such a distinct way and handled the topic of suicide and what it means to be a first generation child of immigrants (specifically Asian) so well that I was in tearing up more often than not. I also enjoyed the cover art and now that I’ve finished, I think it’s supposed to represent Beth and Jason. Highly recommend this novel (the author does have triggers warnings in the beginning of the novel.)
Content Warnings
Graphic: Suicide attempt
Moderate: Physical abuse and Panic attacks/disorders
jessy_reads's review
dark
emotional
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
4.0
If it was only based on enjoyment, this book would have gotten 4.5 stars. This book was great. When I started reading, I had no idea what I was getting into, but this is exactly the type of story that I love reading. I'm so glad I picked it up. After only a few pages, I fell in love with the group of friends, their unique personalities, and the way they shine just that bit brighter when they are together. Add to that Gilbert's beautiful writing, simple yet mesmerizing, and this story seems to be made just for me.
Unfortunately, I wish I could have gotten to read more about Jason's recovery and Jason's father's motives. This is what led to the lower rating than the premise of the story and the writing deserved. The ending was not entirely satisfying to me, but I know that it is very difficult for me to find a book focused on mental health that has a satisfying ending. Wrap it up neatly, and it seems unrealistic. Give a realistic ending by letting the character continue to suffer, and it won't feel like an ending.
Still, I loved this story. I loved the characters and just wanted to get to know them intimately. I loved their discussions, which I could recognize myself in. I loved how concerned they were for Jason, how considerate, while feeling so powerless too, and it is something that each of us can relate to. Finally, I thought Gilbert was able to achieve a nice balance between darkness and the "romantic" scenes. It is hard to do, build a romance while also showing the darkest side of the characters, but their friendship had built a solid foundation for the next step romantically. I loved getting to know Beth and Jason.
So, didn't know what i was getting into, but I'm so glad I picked this up! This is exactly my jam.
Unfortunately, I wish I could have gotten to read more about Jason's recovery and Jason's father's motives. This is what led to the lower rating than the premise of the story and the writing deserved. The ending was not entirely satisfying to me, but I know that it is very difficult for me to find a book focused on mental health that has a satisfying ending. Wrap it up neatly, and it seems unrealistic. Give a realistic ending by letting the character continue to suffer, and it won't feel like an ending.
Still, I loved this story. I loved the characters and just wanted to get to know them intimately. I loved their discussions, which I could recognize myself in. I loved how concerned they were for Jason, how considerate, while feeling so powerless too, and it is something that each of us can relate to. Finally, I thought Gilbert was able to achieve a nice balance between darkness and the "romantic" scenes. It is hard to do, build a romance while also showing the darkest side of the characters, but their friendship had built a solid foundation for the next step romantically. I loved getting to know Beth and Jason.
So, didn't know what i was getting into, but I'm so glad I picked this up! This is exactly my jam.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Abandonment, Child abuse, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Suicide attempt, and Violence
thetealdeal's review
3.75
Content Warnings
Graphic: Suicide, Suicide attempt, Mental illness, Toxic friendship, Toxic relationship, Panic attacks/disorders, Domestic abuse, and Child abuse
xoodlebooks's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
reflective
sad
tense
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
Content Warnings
Graphic: Abandonment, Child abuse, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Grief, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Physical abuse, Sexism, Suicidal thoughts, and Suicide attempt
Moderate: Racism
Minor: Medical content
nattiegracelin's review
emotional
sad
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Panic attacks/disorders
Moderate: Racism and Suicide attempt
melaniereadsbooks's review
challenging
emotional
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.0
This book was extremely hard for me to read because of the content! I also really could not connect with the main character in any way. She was so one-track-minded about staying with her friends that she didn't even have a real personality for almost the entire book. Then I thought the ending stretched out too long and this book could have been a lot shorter. The writing was pretty good, but everything was just so slow.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Suicidal thoughts, Suicide attempt, Abandonment, Grief, Mental illness, and Panic attacks/disorders
Moderate: Vomit