Scan barcode
summersnitch's review
emotional
reflective
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.0
It was a nice idea, but I didn't really enjoy it too much. It felt unsatisfying most of the time, because everything was always at least a bit miserable and there rarely really was a time where they actually enjoyed their life. Solid book and a cool idea, but would not read again.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Panic attacks/disorders and Mental illness
Moderate: Alcohol
Minor: Biphobia, Vomit, Suicidal thoughts, Sexual assault, Physical abuse, Miscarriage, Eating disorder, and Domestic abuse
rdh's review
emotional
sad
slow-paced
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
I left a review for this book yesterday, and was up all night thinking about it. Perhaps this makes this book better than I had originally thought-- I keep thinking about it. But here's the thing: I did not like it. And I've been running through my head, trying to puzzle together the reason why.
Let's start with the positives, because there are wonderful positives:
Hayes's prose is wonderful. She's got this witty grit to her writing, and the narrative weaves past and the-even-farther-past together in a way that reads the same way that we think. There's long tangents, distant thoughts, this sort of rambling quality that never feels pointless.
The premise of this book is also deeply interesting. A love story told in reverse. You know going in that the conclusion will be the start, and that the beginning is really the end, and it leaves you with this desire to pick up the book again and read it backwards.
The moments with Lena and Claudine were the most engaging, fascinating bits of the book. Chuck the rest out, honestly. No spoilers, but the few scenes with those characters in them commanded so much energy and tension, far more than the rest of the book.
Now, for the negatives. For me, there are a fair few:
The main character was deeply unrelatabe for me. I found this strange while reading -- that I could feel so distant from a protagonist that embodies so much of myself. I too love to write. I too feel anxious more often than not. I too am ambiguous in my sexuality. The problem was, I didn't like the protagonist. Was it because she was too like me? I don't know. But I felt a distinct wall between us when I read, and no matter how emotional the prose or the confessions got, I couldn't bring myself to feel anything for her, because I had never been convinced that she was someone to root for. The love interest was similarly disinteresting (and honestly, a bit pathetic) but I don't begrudge the book that. It was the point -- I get that.
I couldn't help but feel like the protagonist was just a Mary Sue/self-insert of Hayes herself. It was distracting when I read because the character was just so like her that I couldn't sit myself into a world that I was told was fictional. I felt uncomfortable, like I was prying into something Hayes had not explicitly said was for us to see. It left the whole world with this hollow, bitter quality.
The book is trying to do too much without really accomplishing anything. There are hints of deeply interesting themes in this book. What it means to be Irish; what it means to be an emigrant. Class, race, feminism, sexuality. What it means to love someone whose political beliefs do not align with your own. Domestic violence, depression, derealization, anxiety.
There are so many things happening here, and none of them are adequately explored. Hayes's love for Ireland is beautifully expressed here, but it doesn't translate to the non-Irish reader. It feels at times like an inside joke we are not in on, only serving to isolate us further from the protagonist. We get hints of what it means to be a working class Irish woman, especially surrounded by the flamboyantly rich and conservative crowd our protagonist knows in London. But we never get a complete understanding, and it left me feeling unfulfilled.
The scenes regarding the protagonist's sexuality stood out to me as the strongest in the whole book. It's reassuring to see a bi/pan/ambiguously queer woman confident in her sexuality, not addressing it because it doesn't need addressing. But the richness and intrigue of those scenes made the rest of the book pale in comparison. They felt like interludes with no real effect on the protagonist's growth. I didn't care about the protagonist's life other than her interaction with women.
And without giving away any spoilers, the way domestic violence and trauma are addressed in this book feels like backstory for backstory's sake. It does not make the character richer; it does not make the book better. It's just trauma we are expected to empathize with, even though it is addressed so late into the book that it doesn't make the character more empathetic at all. It feels like an add-on that's supposed to pack a punch but does not. I didn't care about the protagonist this whole time, and now I'm supposed to feel some way about her that I don't. Incidentally, a sentiment the protagonist addresses in the book itself. At least we have solidarity on that front.
I didn't star this review, because I found it rather impossible to quantify my feelings about the book that way. Reading other reviews, clearly people connected with this book in a way I don't. I don't think those reviews are any less correct because our experiences with the text were different. Ultimately, Hayes's novel fulfills its promise to its readers. This is a love story told in reverse. It's sad and funny and hopeful in a heartbreaking way.
Hayes is an incredible writer. Her prose is delightful, and it will only improve as she writes more books. I will 100% be buying other stuff she writes, I just think this book missed its mark. There are so many missed opportunities. It feels a bit like a watered down Normal People, when it had every opportunity to make itself its own.
Let's start with the positives, because there are wonderful positives:
Hayes's prose is wonderful. She's got this witty grit to her writing, and the narrative weaves past and the-even-farther-past together in a way that reads the same way that we think. There's long tangents, distant thoughts, this sort of rambling quality that never feels pointless.
The premise of this book is also deeply interesting. A love story told in reverse. You know going in that the conclusion will be the start, and that the beginning is really the end, and it leaves you with this desire to pick up the book again and read it backwards.
The moments with Lena and Claudine were the most engaging, fascinating bits of the book. Chuck the rest out, honestly. No spoilers, but the few scenes with those characters in them commanded so much energy and tension, far more than the rest of the book.
Now, for the negatives. For me, there are a fair few:
The main character was deeply unrelatabe for me. I found this strange while reading -- that I could feel so distant from a protagonist that embodies so much of myself. I too love to write. I too feel anxious more often than not. I too am ambiguous in my sexuality. The problem was, I didn't like the protagonist. Was it because she was too like me? I don't know. But I felt a distinct wall between us when I read, and no matter how emotional the prose or the confessions got, I couldn't bring myself to feel anything for her, because I had never been convinced that she was someone to root for. The love interest was similarly disinteresting (and honestly, a bit pathetic) but I don't begrudge the book that. It was the point -- I get that.
I couldn't help but feel like the protagonist was just a Mary Sue/self-insert of Hayes herself. It was distracting when I read because the character was just so like her that I couldn't sit myself into a world that I was told was fictional. I felt uncomfortable, like I was prying into something Hayes had not explicitly said was for us to see. It left the whole world with this hollow, bitter quality.
The book is trying to do too much without really accomplishing anything. There are hints of deeply interesting themes in this book. What it means to be Irish; what it means to be an emigrant. Class, race, feminism, sexuality. What it means to love someone whose political beliefs do not align with your own. Domestic violence, depression, derealization, anxiety.
There are so many things happening here, and none of them are adequately explored. Hayes's love for Ireland is beautifully expressed here, but it doesn't translate to the non-Irish reader. It feels at times like an inside joke we are not in on, only serving to isolate us further from the protagonist. We get hints of what it means to be a working class Irish woman, especially surrounded by the flamboyantly rich and conservative crowd our protagonist knows in London. But we never get a complete understanding, and it left me feeling unfulfilled.
The scenes regarding the protagonist's sexuality stood out to me as the strongest in the whole book. It's reassuring to see a bi/pan/ambiguously queer woman confident in her sexuality, not addressing it because it doesn't need addressing. But the richness and intrigue of those scenes made the rest of the book pale in comparison. They felt like interludes with no real effect on the protagonist's growth. I didn't care about the protagonist's life other than her interaction with women.
And without giving away any spoilers, the way domestic violence and trauma are addressed in this book feels like backstory for backstory's sake. It does not make the character richer; it does not make the book better. It's just trauma we are expected to empathize with, even though it is addressed so late into the book that it doesn't make the character more empathetic at all. It feels like an add-on that's supposed to pack a punch but does not. I didn't care about the protagonist this whole time, and now I'm supposed to feel some way about her that I don't. Incidentally, a sentiment the protagonist addresses in the book itself. At least we have solidarity on that front.
I didn't star this review, because I found it rather impossible to quantify my feelings about the book that way. Reading other reviews, clearly people connected with this book in a way I don't. I don't think those reviews are any less correct because our experiences with the text were different. Ultimately, Hayes's novel fulfills its promise to its readers. This is a love story told in reverse. It's sad and funny and hopeful in a heartbreaking way.
Hayes is an incredible writer. Her prose is delightful, and it will only improve as she writes more books. I will 100% be buying other stuff she writes, I just think this book missed its mark. There are so many missed opportunities. It feels a bit like a watered down Normal People, when it had every opportunity to make itself its own.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Domestic abuse, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, and Suicidal thoughts
Moderate: Vomit
Minor: Miscarriage
More...