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myrthekorf's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
informative
reflective
sad
slow-paced
3.5
imogenrobinson__'s review
3.5
Animals perish; only humans die – because we are creatures who are aware of our own mortality. This awareness, which can feel vertiginous, unendurable, is also what gives us selfhood, and life shape and meaning.
It is no wonder Gerrard won the Orwell Prize for Journalism for exploring dementia. She looks at the subject with an avid interest in the disease and the treatment of it. Her interviews and anecdotes shed a lot of light on what it is like to live with dementia, and what it is like to be the caregiver of a sufferer.
I like that Gerrard encourages healthcare providers to use the proper titles of those in their care, and not dehumanise them with pet names or speak about them as if they are not in the room. She stresses the importance of routine and environment, and how carers should be allowed to have longer visiting hours when someone with dementia is hospitalised.
I also like that she highlights the importance of the arts in helping those with dementia to reconnect to the self, as this is a disease which effectively dismantles the self.
She handles a challenging subject with precision, focussing on what needs to change and how we can remain hopeful about an illness which comes in the night for our memories, which for a lot of us, are our most treasured possessions. I like her unexpected use of the Dr Seuss quote "Fun is good" in her discussion of the fear of ageing. She reminds the reader that it is easy to forget to enjoy life and have fun while you can.
I admire her a lot for this piece of work.
thedeathmaven's review
5.0
This is a beautiful and heartbreaking read. I admire the author for sharing her journey with her father and thank her for giving this insight into their lives. I am sure it will help anyone who is having to handle caring for a loved one with this terrible disease.
nancyroz1234's review against another edition
5.0
It was one of the most difficult books I have ever read. I cried more times than I can count. However, it is a must read for anyone who has lost or cared for a loved one with dementia or has a family history that may lead to their own dementia. It is so insightful, poignant, informative, and loving. It talks through the stages and educates. Great book. Thank you Nicci.
janefc's review
adventurous
challenging
dark
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
sad
slow-paced
4.0
corks's review
dark
emotional
informative
reflective
sad
slow-paced
Wtf... it will take me a while to recover from this book. The prose is absolutely stunning, the stories told are heartbreaking while maintaining hope for end of life dignity. It took me a while to get through this book because it was so emotional. It is such a comprehensive look at all sides of dementia and grieving and I will forever appreciate the love and care Gerrard took in her prose and research. I think it would make anyone in proximity to dementia, as it did for me, feel supported, and less alone.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Excrement, Dementia, Suicide, Grief, Death, and Terminal illness
Moderate: Medical trauma and Medical content
wangx0800's review against another edition
2.0
Didn't finish. I was expecting a book about dementia, with a mix of medical knowledge and personal perspectives. However, the author keeps talking about how miserable old ages can be and brought nothing specific related to dementia. I lost my focus and interest in it.
spittingyarn's review against another edition
4.0
I knew Nikki Gerrard only as one half of psychological thriller duo Nikki French. Here she deftly manages a significantly different and challenging writing remit. Weaving together memoir, science, personal stories from people living with dementia, and sociological perspective, Gerrard asks and answers difficult questions about living with dementia, supporting affected loved ones, supporting carers, and death and its aftermath.
As the title implies, Gerrard reflects on what society’s attitude to dementia tells us about our ideas of the Self, and about love. 1 in 6 people over 80 are affected by this decline of brain functioning. There is something to be said for reading books like these and assimilating their important messages before their topics become directly relevant. Forewarned is forearmed and Gerrard delivers her message with care.
Most significantly, this book identifies a real crisis in care for people living with dementia. Our care infrastructure in the U.K. seems woefully set up for dealing with the very specific but all to common challenges that the loss of cognitive functioning brings with it. While significant funding and a cultural shift are still badly needed, Gerrard herself has played a significant role in improving the landscape for people living with dementia by establishing John’s Campaign (named for Gerrard’s father who died from dementia) for the right of people with dementia to be supported by their family carers.
An effective and lasting tribute to Gerrard’s father.
As the title implies, Gerrard reflects on what society’s attitude to dementia tells us about our ideas of the Self, and about love. 1 in 6 people over 80 are affected by this decline of brain functioning. There is something to be said for reading books like these and assimilating their important messages before their topics become directly relevant. Forewarned is forearmed and Gerrard delivers her message with care.
Most significantly, this book identifies a real crisis in care for people living with dementia. Our care infrastructure in the U.K. seems woefully set up for dealing with the very specific but all to common challenges that the loss of cognitive functioning brings with it. While significant funding and a cultural shift are still badly needed, Gerrard herself has played a significant role in improving the landscape for people living with dementia by establishing John’s Campaign (named for Gerrard’s father who died from dementia) for the right of people with dementia to be supported by their family carers.
An effective and lasting tribute to Gerrard’s father.