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3.93 AVERAGE
3.93 AVERAGE
challenging
emotional
hopeful
inspiring
reflective
sad
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
Complicated
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
even though i'm a mother, i have so many childhood, from when i was a girl and a young woman, and i haven't forgotten a thing. so why did we think of mom as a mom from the very beginning?
this book moved me so much that i feel the need to pour out my feelings before they fade.
as an asian with older-generation parents and five siblings, i grew up in a household marked by poverty. holding this physical copy of the book feels like a privilege. parts of it brought back memories of those difficult times, though i can’t speak much about them because i am the youngest, the one who escaped poverty by the time i turned sixteen.
one of the most emotional parts of the book is when the characters realize that their mother was once a child too. she wasn’t always a mother—she was someone’s baby before she became their mom. that moved me deeply. no matter how old we get, we will always need our mom, always feel excited to see our siblings, and always carry dreams we may have forgotten.
before reading this book, i wrote in my diary about my fear of starting a family. i’m scared of the idea of needing my mom while also being a mom. i worry about waking up one day, with a family of my own, and feeling an ache to see my mommy. the thought makes me anxious. reading this book comforted me because it made me realize i’m not alone. we all yearn for our moms. the way the author portrayed motherhood is so tender, so beautiful. i cried when so-nyo was reunited with her own mom. so-nyo, who had endured so much, who gave her all for her children, finally broke down in her mother’s arms. it was heartbreaking and heartwarming all at once.
this book also made me appreciate my oldest brother more. we’ve always joked that he’s our mom’s favorite, but now i see it differently. he was with her the longest, the first to call her “mom.” so-nyo’s words about her firstborn helped me understand that unique bond. my brother has done so much to lift our family out of poverty, and i know my mom feels that too. it’s made me love and respect my siblings even more.
this book reminded me of the strength and beauty of motherhood, of how collective and resilient women are, and of how deeply we are connected to the ones we love. i love it! : )
This text is both beautiful and heartbreaking. Shin captures the disconnects between loved ones and the ways that people can be strangers, even in familial relationships. The plot is fairly simple-- an elderly woman (mom/wife/grandma) vanishes after getting separated from her husband in Seoul station. As various family members try to understand and cope with her sudden disappearance, what is known and not known about the woman's life is explored. The cracks in family relationships are highlighted. The love that permeates these disconnects is equally accentuated. There are so many things that I loved about this text from a thematic perspective! Shin's work made me reflect on my own relationships and the areas where they are lacking. As someone who lived in Korea for 3 years, I also really loved reading about familiar places!
At the same time, I also found Shin's narrative choices jarring at times. Shin used second person narrative voice (e.g. "you were there..."). In several moments, I found myself grasping to understand who I was in relation to the speaker or struggling to keep identities straight. Based on themes within the text, these jarring disconnects could very well be intentional. However, I found the narrative approaches detracted from my reading experience at times.
Otherwise, a powerful read. I still strongly recommend it.
At the same time, I also found Shin's narrative choices jarring at times. Shin used second person narrative voice (e.g. "you were there..."). In several moments, I found myself grasping to understand who I was in relation to the speaker or struggling to keep identities straight. Based on themes within the text, these jarring disconnects could very well be intentional. However, I found the narrative approaches detracted from my reading experience at times.
Otherwise, a powerful read. I still strongly recommend it.
The last of my Korean translated fiction binge, this book gave me the most immersive look at Korean family life. I really felt like I was in Seoul with this poor family looking for their beloved mother.
هذه الرواية تجعلك تفكر بالآخر الذي يعمل بصمت وكيف أننا لا نرى أهميته إلا عندما يغيب.
عن الأم التي تضحي بالكثير ولا يشعر أبنائها ولا زوجها بالتقدير والامتنان .
بالنعم التي تكون في أيادينا ولا نشعر بها إلا حين ضياعها.
عن الأم التي تضحي بالكثير ولا يشعر أبنائها ولا زوجها بالتقدير والامتنان .
بالنعم التي تكون في أيادينا ولا نشعر بها إلا حين ضياعها.
High four stars. Poignant is not usually my go-to word when it comes to books, but there's nothing more accurate with this one. At a time when my own grandmother's memory is faded, this beautifully written story about family, mothers and aging was... oof.
This book was absolutely heartbreaking, but such a fantastic read. A few of the chapters are written in second person, which I didn't think I would like, but it ended up not bothering me nearly as much as I thought it would.
I think that this book is probably harder for people who come from very happy families to really understand. I saw many reviews that talked about how the mother couldn't possibly be that selfless and that the family was just awful to her, but there are moms like that. My mom is like that. My family has always been really dysfunctional, and I saw a lot of my parents' relationship in the relationship of the mom and dad in this book.
emotional
reflective
sad
slow-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
Di sini ada 4 pov; penulis, anak sulung, bapak, sama ibu. yg pov ibu MUNGKIN awalnya bakal bingung ini pov siapa, but you will figure it out soon.
Ada beberapa quote yg gue inget di sini, kayak anak pertama itu jadi sebuah pengalaman pertama yg belum pernah dilakuin seorang ibu. Kayak mengandung, melahirkan, ngurus anak, nganter ijazah jauh2 ke seoul dari desa. Sama "menjalani sehari-hari saja sudah cukup menakutkan", this quote HITS me bcs it's my current situation.
Seperti kebanyakan yg gak orang sadari, keberadaan ibu tuh suka gak dihargai pas orangnya masih ada. Giliran orangnya udah gak ada, langsung nyesel, langsung janji bakal ngelakuin abc kalo ibu masih ada. Udah jadi konformitas juga kalo tiap ibu tuh tiang di tiap keluarga. Makanya kalo gak ada,RIWEUH. Udah jadi konformitas kalo ibu tuh yg paling kepo sama kehidupan anggota keluarganya. Dan sayangnya,udah jadi konformitas juga kita nyikapinnya judes. Pdl ya tinggal jawab aja. tapi mungkin krn ditanya-tanya terus jadi kesel. Pdl bisa aja kalo orang lain yg kayak gitu,kita masih bisa sabar.
Sama kayak si bapak yg ke orang lain ramah tapi ke istri sendiri,nyebelin. Tapi emang sikap kita bakal NGESELIN ke orang yg akrab sama kita. Kita suka lupa kalo ibu tuh punya perasaan. Tapi krn ngeliatnya itu ibu,jadi suka semena-mena aja. Baru nyesel pas orangnya gak ada.
Pas bapaknya bilang kalo dia sakit, istrinya pasti langsung beliin obat,langsung diurusin tapi giliran istrinya yg sakit,cuma disuruh minum obat aja. Kayak "gue tuh ngurus lu tiap sakit. kok lu gak ada balas budinya gitu sih pas gue sakit". Gak adil aja. Tapi emang ibu tuh jarang ngeluh atau bahkan gak pernah ngeluh ya. Krn gak pernah ngeluh ini jadi mikir ibu tuh sehat terus. Pdl ya gak mungkin. Tapi gue mikir, mungkin ibu bisa nahan semuanya krn udah pernah rasain hidup di ambang kematian a.k.a melahirkan? Jadi apapun sakitnya,apapun masalahnya,mereka bisa tahan.
Dulu waktu kecil,gue mikir apa ibu gue pas lahir udah langsung segede itu. Gue gak mikir kalo ibu gue tuh orang kayak gue,jadi pasti dia ngelaluin tahapan kehidupan persis kayak gue. Tapi kr gue liatnya dia tuh ibu,jadi dia pas lahir udah gede,udah jadi ibu. Dan ternyata anak2 di sini juga beranggapan gitu. Kalo kalian misal baca review gue,apa pernah punya pikiran gini juga?
Sebenernya tanpa baca ini,gue lebih mencoba buat jadi anak berbakti ke emak gue. Krn gue takut,nyesel-senyeselnya kalo emak gue udah gak ada. Tapi baca ini,jadi bikin tambah takut. Gmna ya nasib gue kalo emak gue gak ada. Gue rasa,emak gue kalo gak ada gue,bisa survive. Sebelumnya dia kan udah pernah hidup tanpa gue. Beda sama gue. Dari lahir,hidup sama dia. Jadi gue rada setuju gak setuju sama pernyataan si ibu kalo yg nganggep kematian itu harus sesuai urutan kayak kelahiran; yg lahir duluan itu yg meninggal duluan. Gue malahan pengen urutan kematian gak sesuai kelahiran. Krn beneran gak tau jadinya hidup gue tanpa emak gue.
This is big spoiler but idc bcs best believe no one will read this. Di bab 3 "Aku pulang", i thought OH ibunya akhirnya pulang. But no,dia ilang sampe 9 bulan. Yg gue yakinin,pasti udah meninggal mengingat kondisinya yg sehari sebelum ilang tuh udah SAKIT. Sangat disayangin ibunya harus ninggalin keluarga yg dia curahin semua tenaga dan cintanya sepanjang hidup dia tanpa harus pamitan terlebih dulu. Perasaan lo pasti gak tenangggg banget kalo anggota keluarga lu ilang. Lu gak tau keadaannya gmna,masih hidup atau meninggal kah
Ada beberapa quote yg gue inget di sini, kayak anak pertama itu jadi sebuah pengalaman pertama yg belum pernah dilakuin seorang ibu. Kayak mengandung, melahirkan, ngurus anak, nganter ijazah jauh2 ke seoul dari desa. Sama "menjalani sehari-hari saja sudah cukup menakutkan", this quote HITS me bcs it's my current situation.
Seperti kebanyakan yg gak orang sadari, keberadaan ibu tuh suka gak dihargai pas orangnya masih ada. Giliran orangnya udah gak ada, langsung nyesel, langsung janji bakal ngelakuin abc kalo ibu masih ada. Udah jadi konformitas juga kalo tiap ibu tuh tiang di tiap keluarga. Makanya kalo gak ada,RIWEUH. Udah jadi konformitas kalo ibu tuh yg paling kepo sama kehidupan anggota keluarganya. Dan sayangnya,udah jadi konformitas juga kita nyikapinnya judes. Pdl ya tinggal jawab aja. tapi mungkin krn ditanya-tanya terus jadi kesel. Pdl bisa aja kalo orang lain yg kayak gitu,kita masih bisa sabar.
Sama kayak si bapak yg ke orang lain ramah tapi ke istri sendiri,nyebelin. Tapi emang sikap kita bakal NGESELIN ke orang yg akrab sama kita. Kita suka lupa kalo ibu tuh punya perasaan. Tapi krn ngeliatnya itu ibu,jadi suka semena-mena aja. Baru nyesel pas orangnya gak ada.
Pas bapaknya bilang kalo dia sakit, istrinya pasti langsung beliin obat,langsung diurusin tapi giliran istrinya yg sakit,cuma disuruh minum obat aja. Kayak "gue tuh ngurus lu tiap sakit. kok lu gak ada balas budinya gitu sih pas gue sakit". Gak adil aja. Tapi emang ibu tuh jarang ngeluh atau bahkan gak pernah ngeluh ya. Krn gak pernah ngeluh ini jadi mikir ibu tuh sehat terus. Pdl ya gak mungkin. Tapi gue mikir, mungkin ibu bisa nahan semuanya krn udah pernah rasain hidup di ambang kematian a.k.a melahirkan? Jadi apapun sakitnya,apapun masalahnya,mereka bisa tahan.
Dulu waktu kecil,gue mikir apa ibu gue pas lahir udah langsung segede itu. Gue gak mikir kalo ibu gue tuh orang kayak gue,jadi pasti dia ngelaluin tahapan kehidupan persis kayak gue. Tapi kr gue liatnya dia tuh ibu,jadi dia pas lahir udah gede,udah jadi ibu. Dan ternyata anak2 di sini juga beranggapan gitu. Kalo kalian misal baca review gue,apa pernah punya pikiran gini juga?
Sebenernya tanpa baca ini,gue lebih mencoba buat jadi anak berbakti ke emak gue. Krn gue takut,nyesel-senyeselnya kalo emak gue udah gak ada. Tapi baca ini,jadi bikin tambah takut. Gmna ya nasib gue kalo emak gue gak ada. Gue rasa,emak gue kalo gak ada gue,bisa survive. Sebelumnya dia kan udah pernah hidup tanpa gue. Beda sama gue. Dari lahir,hidup sama dia. Jadi gue rada setuju gak setuju sama pernyataan si ibu kalo yg nganggep kematian itu harus sesuai urutan kayak kelahiran; yg lahir duluan itu yg meninggal duluan. Gue malahan pengen urutan kematian gak sesuai kelahiran. Krn beneran gak tau jadinya hidup gue tanpa emak gue.
This is big spoiler but idc bcs best believe no one will read this. Di bab 3 "Aku pulang", i thought OH ibunya akhirnya pulang. But no,dia ilang sampe 9 bulan. Yg gue yakinin,pasti udah meninggal mengingat kondisinya yg sehari sebelum ilang tuh udah SAKIT. Sangat disayangin ibunya harus ninggalin keluarga yg dia curahin semua tenaga dan cintanya sepanjang hidup dia tanpa harus pamitan terlebih dulu. Perasaan lo pasti gak tenangggg banget kalo anggota keluarga lu ilang. Lu gak tau keadaannya gmna,masih hidup atau meninggal kah