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zakcebulski's review
challenging
dark
emotional
sad
tense
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.0
<spoilers>
Hi folks!
Well, I finally read this book! In my friend group this play is a favorite. I, however, have not seen it. In fact, I know only one song from the soundtrack (can you tell that I am not the most knowledgeable when it comes to stage plays??).
So, my girlfriend graciously got me this book, and I finally got around to reading it.
I have heard that the book is not the best way to enjoy this story, so, with that in mind, I can say that I thought that this book was... okay. I did not feel blown away by it at all, and in fact, I ended it off by not really liking the titular character very much at all.
The story follows a senior- Evan Hansen who is 17 and is an awkward, anxious outcast with a broken arm. He lives with his mother- Heidi, who I feel is a really great character honestly.
Evan is a character who I am sure many of us can relate to on some level or another due to the feelings of social isolation and anxiety which he feels.
On the first day of school there is an event wherein Evan crosses paths with one Conner Murphy who is another social outcast who is the brother of Evan's crush- Zoe.
Conner shoves Evan and takes with him a note which Evan had written himself. This note is an assignment from Evan's therapist who asked that Evan write a note to himself essentially manifesting positivity- starting it with "Dear Evan Hansen...".
It is revealed that over the next day Conner committed suicide- later revealed to be from unrequited love (actually revealed to just be business that stunted any conversation) with a character- Miguel.
Upon his death, Conner's family finds the note that he took from Evan, which seems to indicate that Evan and Conner were friends.
Now, what this does is... set Evan up for a series of really, truly very fucking bad decisions.
Evan states that he and Conner were not only friends, but, they were the absolute best of friends.
Now, most people would immediately clear the air, and go from there that it was a misunderstanding and that the letter was actually to himself and that's that! Not Evan- he lets this lie build and build to the point where he employs Jared, a family friend (and also one of the worst characters in this book, in my opinion), to fabricate emails between Evan and Conner completely synthesizing a relationship that never existed.
Evan starts to benefit from these emails by getting closer to Zoe (to the point wherein they start faux-dating) and even becoming close with Larry and Cynthia- Conner's parents, who see Evan as a through line to get to know their recently deceased son. I feel so fucking bad for the Murphy's, man, this shit is despicable to play with their emotions like Evan is.
There is eventually a project called the Conner Project, which serves as a platform to hear the unheard, and to be there for those people who feel like they are alone in the world. Now, this is obviously a fantastic initiative, but, goddamn it is a castle built on sand.
And, what happens when a castle is built on sand? The sand moves and the castle crumbles, which is exactly what happens in this book. The lie obviously comes out and Evan is forced to face the bullshit that he was spewing. But, what the fuck man, he faces quite literally no repercussions aside from the Murphy's being mad at him for a bit...? I can't lie, I was not at all a fan of the ending of this book. It felt like Evan was a very manipulative person who was only doing this stuff for personal gain, and because he had no desire to speak the truth, or if he did, he was too scared to (which does not give him a pass?). Basically, what Evan did was foce the Murphy's to not only lose their son again, but, to lose a fabricated idealized version of him, who was also struggling with addiction.
That is a real piece of shit move.
Now, probably the biggest theme of this book is projecting an identity that is not genuine, and I think that this was explored very well. From Evan who has his entire life made up throughout the book, to people like Zoe who feels bad that she doesn't feel bad about her brother's passing because they weren't actually that close, to Conner who was a closeted gay/ bi man but projected a facade of being straight. I thought that the exploration of these themes was very very well done and gives some nice food for thought for the reader.
I also wonder, and wondered in my reading, what are the moral implications of the Conner Project (I just realized I have been spelling Connor with an E for some reason throughout this review- my mistake.)? The project undoubtedly does good, but, it is stemming from a completely synthesized memory/ idea of a person who killed himself. To me, this is morally dubious, because while it does help people, without a doubt, it is still perverting the memory of who Connor was and is ultimately not in his memory because he was not the person who Evan is touting him as being. I think that this actually acts to do more harm to Connor's memory because his memory is being ushered out by the fake version whom Evan is making up, which is super fucking shitty.
I did as well like the analysis of what it means to know someone. After the unfortunate passing of a person there will always be a flood of social media posts by people who state that they loved this person, and that they were best friends with me and this and that. I think that this is a narcissistic view of mortality in the internet age as many people will take someone else's passing and immediately flip it on them. Instead of "this person passed away, may they rest in peace", it is "this person passed away, and it is affecting ME", which is disturbing and fucked up. We have come to a point in society wherein people are not opposed to benefitting from the deaths of others, and Evan is a prime example of the worst-case scenario in this.
I know that Evan is the main character in this book, but, man, I really did not like him at all. I thought that he was a manipulative person who fell back on his mental illness as a means of letting things go way too fucking far, and seemingly getting a pass for his actions while benefitting from the fires he was letting rage. Let it be said- mental illness is not a get out of jail free pass- and it is sort of illustrated as such in this book. Evan truly faces no repercussions for his actions which I think is super shitty, and I feel horrible for people like the Murphy's who were subjected to this horseshit after the tragedy of losing their son.
I am interested to see how the play stacks up to the book, because, I left this with a very sour feeling toward Evan.
</spoilers>
Hi folks!
Well, I finally read this book! In my friend group this play is a favorite. I, however, have not seen it. In fact, I know only one song from the soundtrack (can you tell that I am not the most knowledgeable when it comes to stage plays??).
So, my girlfriend graciously got me this book, and I finally got around to reading it.
I have heard that the book is not the best way to enjoy this story, so, with that in mind, I can say that I thought that this book was... okay. I did not feel blown away by it at all, and in fact, I ended it off by not really liking the titular character very much at all.
The story follows a senior- Evan Hansen who is 17 and is an awkward, anxious outcast with a broken arm. He lives with his mother- Heidi, who I feel is a really great character honestly.
Evan is a character who I am sure many of us can relate to on some level or another due to the feelings of social isolation and anxiety which he feels.
On the first day of school there is an event wherein Evan crosses paths with one Conner Murphy who is another social outcast who is the brother of Evan's crush- Zoe.
Conner shoves Evan and takes with him a note which Evan had written himself. This note is an assignment from Evan's therapist who asked that Evan write a note to himself essentially manifesting positivity- starting it with "Dear Evan Hansen...".
It is revealed that over the next day Conner committed suicide- later revealed to be from unrequited love (actually revealed to just be business that stunted any conversation) with a character- Miguel.
Upon his death, Conner's family finds the note that he took from Evan, which seems to indicate that Evan and Conner were friends.
Now, what this does is... set Evan up for a series of really, truly very fucking bad decisions.
Evan states that he and Conner were not only friends, but, they were the absolute best of friends.
Now, most people would immediately clear the air, and go from there that it was a misunderstanding and that the letter was actually to himself and that's that! Not Evan- he lets this lie build and build to the point where he employs Jared, a family friend (and also one of the worst characters in this book, in my opinion), to fabricate emails between Evan and Conner completely synthesizing a relationship that never existed.
Evan starts to benefit from these emails by getting closer to Zoe (to the point wherein they start faux-dating) and even becoming close with Larry and Cynthia- Conner's parents, who see Evan as a through line to get to know their recently deceased son. I feel so fucking bad for the Murphy's, man, this shit is despicable to play with their emotions like Evan is.
There is eventually a project called the Conner Project, which serves as a platform to hear the unheard, and to be there for those people who feel like they are alone in the world. Now, this is obviously a fantastic initiative, but, goddamn it is a castle built on sand.
And, what happens when a castle is built on sand? The sand moves and the castle crumbles, which is exactly what happens in this book. The lie obviously comes out and Evan is forced to face the bullshit that he was spewing. But, what the fuck man, he faces quite literally no repercussions aside from the Murphy's being mad at him for a bit...? I can't lie, I was not at all a fan of the ending of this book. It felt like Evan was a very manipulative person who was only doing this stuff for personal gain, and because he had no desire to speak the truth, or if he did, he was too scared to (which does not give him a pass?). Basically, what Evan did was foce the Murphy's to not only lose their son again, but, to lose a fabricated idealized version of him, who was also struggling with addiction.
That is a real piece of shit move.
Now, probably the biggest theme of this book is projecting an identity that is not genuine, and I think that this was explored very well. From Evan who has his entire life made up throughout the book, to people like Zoe who feels bad that she doesn't feel bad about her brother's passing because they weren't actually that close, to Conner who was a closeted gay/ bi man but projected a facade of being straight. I thought that the exploration of these themes was very very well done and gives some nice food for thought for the reader.
I also wonder, and wondered in my reading, what are the moral implications of the Conner Project (I just realized I have been spelling Connor with an E for some reason throughout this review- my mistake.)? The project undoubtedly does good, but, it is stemming from a completely synthesized memory/ idea of a person who killed himself. To me, this is morally dubious, because while it does help people, without a doubt, it is still perverting the memory of who Connor was and is ultimately not in his memory because he was not the person who Evan is touting him as being. I think that this actually acts to do more harm to Connor's memory because his memory is being ushered out by the fake version whom Evan is making up, which is super fucking shitty.
I did as well like the analysis of what it means to know someone. After the unfortunate passing of a person there will always be a flood of social media posts by people who state that they loved this person, and that they were best friends with me and this and that. I think that this is a narcissistic view of mortality in the internet age as many people will take someone else's passing and immediately flip it on them. Instead of "this person passed away, may they rest in peace", it is "this person passed away, and it is affecting ME", which is disturbing and fucked up. We have come to a point in society wherein people are not opposed to benefitting from the deaths of others, and Evan is a prime example of the worst-case scenario in this.
I know that Evan is the main character in this book, but, man, I really did not like him at all. I thought that he was a manipulative person who fell back on his mental illness as a means of letting things go way too fucking far, and seemingly getting a pass for his actions while benefitting from the fires he was letting rage. Let it be said- mental illness is not a get out of jail free pass- and it is sort of illustrated as such in this book. Evan truly faces no repercussions for his actions which I think is super shitty, and I feel horrible for people like the Murphy's who were subjected to this horseshit after the tragedy of losing their son.
I am interested to see how the play stacks up to the book, because, I left this with a very sour feeling toward Evan.
</spoilers>
Content Warnings
Moderate: Child death, Gaslighting, Death, Injury/Injury detail, Bullying, and Car accident
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