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le_fromage_en_fue's review
4.0
I am glad that this book exists as a lived experience of the celibate life the same-sex-attracted Christian can live. It also provides a good explanation as to why the author feels this choice is necessary.
cocoonofbooks's review against another edition
2.0
I've read a lot of books in this vein (I was in a book club about faith and sexuality for about 6 months), and while I knew going in that I wouldn't agree with Hill's conclusions, this is cited often enough as a classic in this genre that I thought I should eventually read this. Specifically I had heard that just as Justin Lee had a gentle, story-based approach to the "Side A" position in [b:Torn|13529091|Torn Rescuing the Gospel from the Gays-vs.-Christians Debate|Justin Lee|http://images.gr-assets.com/books/1340228841s/13529091.jpg|19086701], Wesley Hill did the same in this book for the "Side B" position.
It was clear immediately that the book's language is quite dated; I'm not sure if that's because the terminology has changed so rapidly in the past decade, or because Hill runs in circles where referring to being gay as "experiencing homo-erotic desire" is still typical. He also references several times the now widely debunked orientation change therapy.
In any case, I was hoping for a thoughtful explanation of the case for celibacy, an explanation of how the author has embraced this part of his identity, and an encouragement for churches to better support their single and celibate members. I've read more of this sort of thing in recent years and was open to hearing the positive case for a Side B life.
I was disappointed to find that Hill ran through the "clobber passages" using the very questionable face-value English translations and extrapolating them to broader applications, with no mention of alternate interpretations. He then concluded that it was obvious that "homosexuals" had to be celibate, and proceeded to talk about the soul-rending difficulties of living that out. He talked about being so lonely all the time that, like Henri Nouwen (another gay celibate), he would often call friends in the middle of the night to process his feelings and extract promises that they would always let him call them at any time, even when they got married.
There isn't a happy ending where Hill talks about embracing his orientation and the call to celibacy. His main consolations, it seems, are that 1) being a Christian means "taking up your cross" and that his struggles therefore make him more like Christ and 2) in heaven all will be made whole and he won't be gay anymore. The contrast to me was clear between the people I know who feel called to celibacy and those like Hill who feel like they have no choice, no matter how painful it is, because faith means trusting that God knows best. I just don't agree with Hill that it's that obvious what God wants.
It was clear immediately that the book's language is quite dated; I'm not sure if that's because the terminology has changed so rapidly in the past decade, or because Hill runs in circles where referring to being gay as "experiencing homo-erotic desire" is still typical. He also references several times the now widely debunked orientation change therapy.
In any case, I was hoping for a thoughtful explanation of the case for celibacy, an explanation of how the author has embraced this part of his identity, and an encouragement for churches to better support their single and celibate members. I've read more of this sort of thing in recent years and was open to hearing the positive case for a Side B life.
I was disappointed to find that Hill ran through the "clobber passages" using the very questionable face-value English translations and extrapolating them to broader applications, with no mention of alternate interpretations. He then concluded that it was obvious that "homosexuals" had to be celibate, and proceeded to talk about the soul-rending difficulties of living that out. He talked about being so lonely all the time that, like Henri Nouwen (another gay celibate), he would often call friends in the middle of the night to process his feelings and extract promises that they would always let him call them at any time, even when they got married.
There isn't a happy ending where Hill talks about embracing his orientation and the call to celibacy. His main consolations, it seems, are that 1) being a Christian means "taking up your cross" and that his struggles therefore make him more like Christ and 2) in heaven all will be made whole and he won't be gay anymore. The contrast to me was clear between the people I know who feel called to celibacy and those like Hill who feel like they have no choice, no matter how painful it is, because faith means trusting that God knows best. I just don't agree with Hill that it's that obvious what God wants.
scshaffer's review against another edition
5.0
This book deserves to be read. Wesley Hill’s voice is needed both in the church and in the wider culture. In his beautifully written and deeply honest book, Washed and Waiting, Hill reflects on his journey as both a homosexual man and a Christian. If you are looking for fuel for the cultural debate surrounding human sexuality, look elsewhere. Hill spends little time ‘arguing’ and even less ‘convincing’ people. Instead, he seeks to share his life as a celibate gay Christian and tell others that they are not alone.
Living with the twin truths of being gay and Christian, Hill presents an often-pained picture of his struggle. He has prayed and not been healed of his desires. He is persuaded by the weight of Scripture and the fullness of the Christian witness that to act on his homoerotic desires would be wrong. Yet he recognizes why the biblical prohibitions seem to fall flat for many people, but seeks to understand why the commands were given and to identify the story that would make sense of the commands.
In the first part of the book, Hill shares the biblical vision that challenges him to a life of celibacy. More than simply one set of texts or another, Hill finds the larger shape of the Christian story to make sense of the call for him to live a life of celibacy. He identifies four aspects of the story that he finds compelling: the promise of forgiveness, the reality that all people stand in need of God’s transformation of their desires, that our bodies belong to God, and the value of patient suffering in Christ. The second part of the book deals largely with the loneliness that has accompanied Hill’s journey and his struggles to find love and community. In the last section, he speaks of the shame that often accompanies a homosexual Christian and the challenge to believe that one is beloved.
I found Washed and Waiting both challenging and compelling. The book is hopeful even as it speaks of deep pain. It is theologically and biblically rich even as it delves into the depths of human experience. Again and again, Hill shows how the mercy of God is good news to him and to all of us. It is a book every Christian should read for at least three reasons.
First, Washed and Waiting complicates our picture of Christianity and homosexuality. Without vitriol, Hill shows a different picture than is usually seen of either homosexual men or the Church. He does this with a level of authenticity and personal investment that speaks volumes. Second, reading Washed and Waiting invites compassion for Hill and others like him who struggle with their sexuality. The story of the loneliness and shame experienced by homosexual Christians should call us to greater love as we follow Christ together. Finally, Washed and Waiting invites each of us to see ourselves in his struggle. While the particular contours of his struggle are unique, every Christian wrestles with indwelling sin. Though the battles look different and have varying levels of intensity, we all have temptations that never seem to go away, only subside for a time. While the story Hill tells is certainly his own, it is also, in some way, the story of every Christian as we are washed clean and waiting for the fullness of redemption.
Living with the twin truths of being gay and Christian, Hill presents an often-pained picture of his struggle. He has prayed and not been healed of his desires. He is persuaded by the weight of Scripture and the fullness of the Christian witness that to act on his homoerotic desires would be wrong. Yet he recognizes why the biblical prohibitions seem to fall flat for many people, but seeks to understand why the commands were given and to identify the story that would make sense of the commands.
In the first part of the book, Hill shares the biblical vision that challenges him to a life of celibacy. More than simply one set of texts or another, Hill finds the larger shape of the Christian story to make sense of the call for him to live a life of celibacy. He identifies four aspects of the story that he finds compelling: the promise of forgiveness, the reality that all people stand in need of God’s transformation of their desires, that our bodies belong to God, and the value of patient suffering in Christ. The second part of the book deals largely with the loneliness that has accompanied Hill’s journey and his struggles to find love and community. In the last section, he speaks of the shame that often accompanies a homosexual Christian and the challenge to believe that one is beloved.
I found Washed and Waiting both challenging and compelling. The book is hopeful even as it speaks of deep pain. It is theologically and biblically rich even as it delves into the depths of human experience. Again and again, Hill shows how the mercy of God is good news to him and to all of us. It is a book every Christian should read for at least three reasons.
First, Washed and Waiting complicates our picture of Christianity and homosexuality. Without vitriol, Hill shows a different picture than is usually seen of either homosexual men or the Church. He does this with a level of authenticity and personal investment that speaks volumes. Second, reading Washed and Waiting invites compassion for Hill and others like him who struggle with their sexuality. The story of the loneliness and shame experienced by homosexual Christians should call us to greater love as we follow Christ together. Finally, Washed and Waiting invites each of us to see ourselves in his struggle. While the particular contours of his struggle are unique, every Christian wrestles with indwelling sin. Though the battles look different and have varying levels of intensity, we all have temptations that never seem to go away, only subside for a time. While the story Hill tells is certainly his own, it is also, in some way, the story of every Christian as we are washed clean and waiting for the fullness of redemption.
thebakerbookworm's review against another edition
5.0
An excellent book that I think is also very appropriate for any Christian struggling with being single.
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