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cicadas_and_starlight's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
5.0
ohkay28's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
4.5
emmbien's review against another edition
4.0
This book is both one activist’s thoughts on how vital community is and how they have cultivated it in their life, and also a collection of case studies. These case studies, illustrated through interviews, show the various ways in which community can powerfully exist outside of church and the nuclear family — or at least free from the oppressive expectations that these societal ideals often inflict. Mia Birdsong’s advice and ruminations helped me reflect on what I want and need to work on in myself. I think I’ll read this again in a few years when I have my own home and children - there were some parts of this which are not yet quite relevant for me, but I still appreciate her honesty and eye opening examination of what community means and why it matters so much.
arielamandah's review against another edition
4.0
3.5 stars. This book adheres to the philosophy of, “Family is what you make it.” It offers views of close circles and communities that differ from the “traditional” nuclear family. If you’ve never been exposed to other ideas of family- and community-making, this may be surprising and eye-opening. However, I expect that for many readers, these arrangements feel familiar — if not personally, than at least known. I hoped to find more in this book on strategies for building more intentional communities and connections. Instead, “I found mine in a church” or “with people I already knew” seemed to be the message. “Be courageous!” felt like the closing suggestion. Don’t misunderstand me: I liked this book and it kept my interest. There is much here that’s really, really good. I kept wanting it to make that final, extra leap into tools and research; had it done so, it could have been outstanding.
slim_oysterhiatus's review against another edition
I'm all for breaking down cishet normative spaces but this sort of communal living sounds like hell to me. Having 16 close friends is unfathomable. But happy it works for some people!
always_reading's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
lighthearted
reflective
medium-paced
4.0
jansyn_liberty's review against another edition
4.0
It was reassuring to feel resonance and familiarity with all of Mia Birdsong’s suggestions for how to build community. I’ve already heard about a lot of these practices and participated in them too.
I particularly resonated with page 222 about being in proximity to community in a small town and not being able to be anonymous or have multiple realities:
“Being relentlessly known terrifies us, but I think we also crave the freedom of it. If you can’t hide yourself, at some point you just have to be, like, “Fuck it.” It’s treatment for the existential loneliness we all experience no matter where we live.”
I particularly resonated with page 222 about being in proximity to community in a small town and not being able to be anonymous or have multiple realities:
“Being relentlessly known terrifies us, but I think we also crave the freedom of it. If you can’t hide yourself, at some point you just have to be, like, “Fuck it.” It’s treatment for the existential loneliness we all experience no matter where we live.”
amr316's review against another edition
4.0
Rounded up from 3.5 stars. This book was at its best when offering concrete ideas for building community and social cohesion. I especially enjoyed the author’s description of “drop-by dinners” and the importance of asking for help in strengthening social bonds.
Near the end, though, the author’s descriptions of various leftist political groups in Oakland grew repetitive. It felt less concretely applicable and more of a demonstration of how involved in progressive politics the author is. Outside this very narrow set of Oakland social justice folks, the author doesn’t really provide case studies of community-building, and the result was a book that felt exhaustingly insular and claustrophobic by the end.
Nevertheless, four stars for an interesting premise that’s given me a lot to think about.
Near the end, though, the author’s descriptions of various leftist political groups in Oakland grew repetitive. It felt less concretely applicable and more of a demonstration of how involved in progressive politics the author is. Outside this very narrow set of Oakland social justice folks, the author doesn’t really provide case studies of community-building, and the result was a book that felt exhaustingly insular and claustrophobic by the end.
Nevertheless, four stars for an interesting premise that’s given me a lot to think about.
nicollej's review against another edition
I’m not rating this book and marking it complete. I made it over 50% through and some of the ideologies discussed didn’t sit well with me. I love the idea of community but as a constant giver, being told to give more was a bit difficult.