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4.14 AVERAGE
4.14 AVERAGE
dark
emotional
reflective
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
Complicated
Loveable characters:
Complicated
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
Entirely up my alley.
This book is about a lot, it made me think about a lot. But I think my favorite part of reading this book was the early chapter about Elizabeth’s unraveling, about how MADDENING motherhood can be, how absolutely defeating childcare can be, and how a grown adult’s ego can be utterly demolished by the stubborn impulses of a toddler.
All of that to say:
Wellness is an intricate study on the risk and reward of losing ourselves in our own stories—about ourselves, about each other, love, time, our childhoods. It’s one of those books that on the surface is about a couple, but it turns out to be about, well, everything?
The illusion of safety in relationships is precarious. It is a human impulse to protect ourselves in our own realities, to wrap ourselves in a narrative safety blanket. So common is the case that we are ignorant to the fact that this safety blanket is fabricated from the past; from the way our parents treated us, from the stories we were told about ourselves, stories that feel so undoubtably true that our safety blanket calcifies into a suit of armor. When faced with True Love, we might as well be a battle field.
And not a fairy tale kind of True Love, but rather the messy, confusing, difficult , triggering, experience of love that can make long term romantic coupling seem like such a feat—like a chore? There were moments in this novel where my stomach sank as the failings on both Jack and Elizabeth’s part cut deep, but as the root of those flaws were revealed, it made me pause: it is too easy to criticize someone in the name of protecting yourself, but doesn’t that dehumanize them? Isn’t that, in its nature, unloving? Isn’t everyone flawed? We all had to come from somewhere, and we ALL bring our origins along for the ride without realizing it. Our ghosts can clash, it makes us think we must have chosen wrong. But what happens when the conflict is re-contextualized? What happens when you let go of the constant need to protect your heart, and instead, let someone else in?
If you have a romantic partner in your life, think of them, pick up this book, and have a box of Kleenex/journal nearby, let Nathan Hill’s story thaw your heart.
This book is about a lot, it made me think about a lot. But I think my favorite part of reading this book was the early chapter about Elizabeth’s unraveling, about how MADDENING motherhood can be, how absolutely defeating childcare can be, and how a grown adult’s ego can be utterly demolished by the stubborn impulses of a toddler.
All of that to say:
Wellness is an intricate study on the risk and reward of losing ourselves in our own stories—about ourselves, about each other, love, time, our childhoods. It’s one of those books that on the surface is about a couple, but it turns out to be about, well, everything?
The illusion of safety in relationships is precarious. It is a human impulse to protect ourselves in our own realities, to wrap ourselves in a narrative safety blanket. So common is the case that we are ignorant to the fact that this safety blanket is fabricated from the past; from the way our parents treated us, from the stories we were told about ourselves, stories that feel so undoubtably true that our safety blanket calcifies into a suit of armor. When faced with True Love, we might as well be a battle field.
And not a fairy tale kind of True Love, but rather the messy, confusing, difficult , triggering, experience of love that can make long term romantic coupling seem like such a feat—like a chore? There were moments in this novel where my stomach sank as the failings on both Jack and Elizabeth’s part cut deep, but as the root of those flaws were revealed, it made me pause: it is too easy to criticize someone in the name of protecting yourself, but doesn’t that dehumanize them? Isn’t that, in its nature, unloving? Isn’t everyone flawed? We all had to come from somewhere, and we ALL bring our origins along for the ride without realizing it. Our ghosts can clash, it makes us think we must have chosen wrong. But what happens when the conflict is re-contextualized? What happens when you let go of the constant need to protect your heart, and instead, let someone else in?
If you have a romantic partner in your life, think of them, pick up this book, and have a box of Kleenex/journal nearby, let Nathan Hill’s story thaw your heart.
I can't decide if this was one star or five. Some of the passages were breathtakingly beautiful and the way that Hill wove together past and present timelines to create very complex, realistic characters was excellent. But it was SO long and there were full pages of description that I straight up skipped over to get to more plot to keep myself going and not DNF. The first half. Was. So. Slow. And at times it felt the author was just showing off how smart he is with a ton of random knowledge. I can't decide if I loved that writing style or hated it.
And yet, Jack and Elizabeth were so realistic and I identified with both of them in so many ways. Extra points for the algorithm chapter, the parenting chapter, the placebo effect research (which has always fascinated me). I suppose other people might enjoy the other deep dives like Chicago 90s music, art history, the Great plains, photography creation, logging and railroads, etc but those dragged for me.
I finally got into the second half and am glad I read and finished it. I'd love to go back and reread some highlights on marriage and nostalgia and growing up that resonated for me. This book encapsulates how we are all different, but also all really the same.
And yet, Jack and Elizabeth were so realistic and I identified with both of them in so many ways. Extra points for the algorithm chapter, the parenting chapter, the placebo effect research (which has always fascinated me). I suppose other people might enjoy the other deep dives like Chicago 90s music, art history, the Great plains, photography creation, logging and railroads, etc but those dragged for me.
I finally got into the second half and am glad I read and finished it. I'd love to go back and reread some highlights on marriage and nostalgia and growing up that resonated for me. This book encapsulates how we are all different, but also all really the same.
funny
informative
lighthearted
reflective
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
adventurous
dark
emotional
funny
hopeful
reflective
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Complicated
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
emotional
funny
reflective
sad
slow-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Complicated
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
There were parts of this I really loved, parts that dragged a bit, a few out-loud chuckles, and a couple of eye-rolls. It went so many places I think it would be very easy for anyone to find at least a part of this book they enjoy. Overall I did like it, and even said out loud a few times "this is a good book"
funny
informative
reflective
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
emotional
funny
reflective
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Complicated
Loveable characters:
Complicated
Diverse cast of characters:
Complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
challenging
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
tense
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
adventurous
funny
reflective
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
Complicated
Loveable characters:
No
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes