Take a photo of a barcode or cover
adventurous
challenging
dark
lighthearted
mysterious
tense
fast-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
No
Loveable characters:
Complicated
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
No
I'd give it one star, but by the time I wanted to DNF it, I was already halfway through the book and decided to begrudgingly commit to finishing the rest of it. ("But there's a half/quarter star rating feature!" don't piss me off more than this book already has. Let me make life simple for myself.)
I'll start this off kindly: I wanted to read this book because the cover is gorgeous and I found the morbid title entertaining. The premise of failed/aspiringmurderers "deletionists" attending a homicide school is fascinating in a gothic, almost comical way. It's an interesting and refreshing story idea that I've personally never seen done. Also, the world-building and mapping of the McMasters college itself is very cool! Every location is described just enough to both instill the intended and evoke a personal description of what everything looks like, which is perfect for someone like me.
However, as many other reviewers have mentioned, there were problems--which were in a grand MAJORITY of the book--that instilled a fury that I myself cannot even begin to fathom.
It's very obvious that Rupert Holmes as a bit of an ego complex, in which he inflates and translates to every, single male character introduced throughout the narration. Dean Harrow. Cliff Iverson. Merrill Fiedler. Simeon Sampson. Jud Helkampf. These are like the first examples I can come up with from the top of my head, but this urge to find Holmes and strangle him was deeply ingrained in me, because why does every single male character have the exact same douchebag attitude? Like, I get it, the time period in this is set post-WW2 when sexism was much bigger than it is now, but Holmes can take the stick shoved up his tush and beat himself with it because he does not do characterization well AT ALL.
I'm almost inclined to say that he (somehow) wrote the women better, but the other two POVs--both of which were women--were insufferable in their own "special" ways. Doria Maye has an incredibly sexualized personality and character: despite her being the most tolerable POV between her, Cliff, and Gemma, I was still eyerolling at her evidently "I am a woman who is sexy, promiscuous, and will use that to manipulate men" trope. Very sexist character trope. Gemma Lindley, on the other hand, was almost written to be as important as diet water, which is to say that Holmes evidently did not have enough going on in the plot (sarcasm) and decided that Cliff needed a romantic love interest or, as my manager called it, a "side-quest." HE DOES NOT NEED THIS SIDE-QUEST. HIS PREVIOUS LOVE INTEREST COMMITTED KYS AND DOES NOT NEED TO HAVE GOOGLY EYES OVER A GIRL HE JUST MET AT THIS HOMICIDE SCHOOL THAT EVIDENTLY HAS NO INTEREST IN HIM IN THE SLIGHTEST! Speaking of which, there is genuinely no hint of Gemma returning his feelings at all until her point of view a third into the book, and her returned feelings during that exam felt cringily forced. And then at the end:"Cliff! You're alive! :D" "Gemma! You're not dead let's go out on a date! ;D" THE STICK, HOLMES. USE THE STICK.
And, oh my god, for all the living things in the world, this book literally treats us like we're stupid. Of course, it doesn't help that the narrator is Dean Harbinger Harrow, one of the most insufferable characters of the book who tries to be morbidly funny and fails to. Every. Thing. Is. Explained. Over. And. Over. Again. Then it's explained IN ELABORATE DETAIL A SECOND TIME when something is just "so clever." Holmes (Holmes...), I hope both sides of your pillow and your bed is a little too warm for comfort every night.
And, of course, the cherry on top...
I'll start this off kindly: I wanted to read this book because the cover is gorgeous and I found the morbid title entertaining. The premise of failed/aspiring
However, as many other reviewers have mentioned, there were problems--which were in a grand MAJORITY of the book--that instilled a fury that I myself cannot even begin to fathom.
It's very obvious that Rupert Holmes as a bit of an ego complex, in which he inflates and translates to every, single male character introduced throughout the narration. Dean Harrow. Cliff Iverson. Merrill Fiedler. Simeon Sampson. Jud Helkampf. These are like the first examples I can come up with from the top of my head, but this urge to find Holmes and strangle him was deeply ingrained in me, because why does every single male character have the exact same douchebag attitude? Like, I get it, the time period in this is set post-WW2 when sexism was much bigger than it is now, but Holmes can take the stick shoved up his tush and beat himself with it because he does not do characterization well AT ALL.
I'm almost inclined to say that he (somehow) wrote the women better, but the other two POVs--both of which were women--were insufferable in their own "special" ways. Doria Maye has an incredibly sexualized personality and character: despite her being the most tolerable POV between her, Cliff, and Gemma, I was still eyerolling at her evidently "I am a woman who is sexy, promiscuous, and will use that to manipulate men" trope. Very sexist character trope. Gemma Lindley, on the other hand, was almost written to be as important as diet water, which is to say that Holmes evidently did not have enough going on in the plot (sarcasm) and decided that Cliff needed a romantic love interest or, as my manager called it, a "side-quest." HE DOES NOT NEED THIS SIDE-QUEST. HIS PREVIOUS LOVE INTEREST COMMITTED KYS AND DOES NOT NEED TO HAVE GOOGLY EYES OVER A GIRL HE JUST MET AT THIS HOMICIDE SCHOOL THAT EVIDENTLY HAS NO INTEREST IN HIM IN THE SLIGHTEST! Speaking of which, there is genuinely no hint of Gemma returning his feelings at all until her point of view a third into the book, and her returned feelings during that exam felt cringily forced. And then at the end:
And, oh my god, for all the living things in the world, this book literally treats us like we're stupid. Of course, it doesn't help that the narrator is Dean Harbinger Harrow, one of the most insufferable characters of the book who tries to be morbidly funny and fails to. Every. Thing. Is. Explained. Over. And. Over. Again. Then it's explained IN ELABORATE DETAIL A SECOND TIME when something is just "so clever." Holmes (Holmes...), I hope both sides of your pillow and your bed is a little too warm for comfort every night.
And, of course, the cherry on top...
"...We are not going to help someone commit murder."
(pg. 260, Chapter XXXVI)
...in a book about murder.
I almost threw this library-owned copy out of the car when I was on the highway. Look, I love ironic statements where it's a character going "It surely can't be that bad." with the starting quote of the next scene being something along the lines of "It was that bad." I love irony. I love humor. I love everything about these when it's properly executed. Note how I say "properly" before executed. This also ties back to my point about the "Holmes's main character syndrome" I was on about. This is a high-ho, smart-alec CEO saying this line, sure. Would it have made me laugh in any other circumstance? Absolutely. But after the rest of the rancid vibes I had to face from pages past, I unironically found myself considering murder. Best find you your Sherlock, Holmes. Whatever contaminated that stick up "there," eat it. Probably tastes better than what you dished for us.
All in all, let me summarize this in the best way I can: I was ranting to my manager about how bad this book was while I was reading it. Am I going to be murdering my employer anytime soon? If I was, then not anymore. That's how bad the book was. It couldn't even manager to make murder cool in a book about cool, "good" murder.
I think I'll find myself a good stick and hunt down Holmes myself...
...in a book about murder.
I almost threw this library-owned copy out of the car when I was on the highway. Look, I love ironic statements where it's a character going "It surely can't be that bad." with the starting quote of the next scene being something along the lines of "It was that bad." I love irony. I love humor. I love everything about these when it's properly executed. Note how I say "properly" before executed. This also ties back to my point about the "Holmes's main character syndrome" I was on about. This is a high-ho, smart-alec CEO saying this line, sure. Would it have made me laugh in any other circumstance? Absolutely. But after the rest of the rancid vibes I had to face from pages past, I unironically found myself considering murder. Best find you your Sherlock, Holmes. Whatever contaminated that stick up "there," eat it. Probably tastes better than what you dished for us.
All in all, let me summarize this in the best way I can: I was ranting to my manager about how bad this book was while I was reading it. Am I going to be murdering my employer anytime soon? If I was, then not anymore. That's how bad the book was. It couldn't even manager to make murder cool in a book about cool, "good" murder.
I think I'll find myself a good stick and hunt down Holmes myself...
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death, Sexual content, Violence, Murder
Moderate: Sexism, Sexual assault, Suicide, Alcohol, War
Minor: Gun violence, Misogyny, Medical content, Kidnapping, Stalking, Car accident, Death of parent, Toxic friendship
There is a part about 3/4 into the book where a character pretends to be trans on multiple occasions in order to commit their murder. Each instance is slightly exaggerated, but IMO not enough to consider transphobia.
adventurous
challenging
dark
funny
lighthearted
mysterious
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Complicated
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
Content Warnings
Graphic: Bullying, Death
Moderate: Emotional abuse, Gun violence, Homophobia, Kidnapping, Murder, Sexual harassment
Minor: Medical content, Death of parent, Pregnancy
adventurous
dark
emotional
funny
mysterious
medium-paced
Strong character development:
Complicated
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Complicated
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Gun violence, Misogyny, Sexism, Suicide, Violence, Murder, Pregnancy, Sexual harassment
adventurous
dark
lighthearted
reflective
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
Content Warnings
Moderate: Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Suicide attempt, Murder
Minor: Gun violence, Misogyny, Transphobia, Death of parent
dark
funny
informative
lighthearted
mysterious
reflective
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Plot
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
No
Content Warnings
Graphic: Gaslighting
Moderate: Death, Gun violence, Self harm, Sexual content, Suicide, Kidnapping, Murder, Alcohol, Sexual harassment, Injury/Injury detail
adventurous
funny
lighthearted
mysterious
fast-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Plot
Strong character development:
No
Loveable characters:
Complicated
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
No
TLDR: Very good Golden Age Style Mystery with a few twists.
I was pleasantly surprised by this mystery novel. The blurb promises entertainment which is delivered mostly in puns in the first half of the book. Then Mr Holmes gets to work with an intricately plotted how-they done-it novel.
The forward is a bit tiresome, but necessary to understanding the setting. The rest of the narrative is an omnipresent narrator and a mix of journal entries from the main character to his patron, reports, and letters. The later being indicated by chapter headings. The style is down to earth with enough description to fill in the blanks but not be flowery. The action is pretty easy to follow and main characters are easy to differentiate.
The characterisation was okay, the minor characters suffered in particular. Main characters were somewhat stereotyped though they acted consistent with their characters throughout the novel. The first part of the novel was rather under peopled though filling a school like it should be is always tricky for both the writer and the reader.
In true Golden Age fashion all the would be deletees were nasty humans. I thought two of them deserved an Orient Express experience to tell the truth. I anticipate there were after the funeral parties. The setting is 1950’s America so at least the author didn’t have to worry about the modern banes of deleters existence DNA and mobile phones. Though one deletion method was old fashioned, the other two were quite novel.
The postscript does make me wonder if the punishment will fit the crime.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Bullying, Death, Emotional abuse, Violence, Murder
Moderate: Body shaming, Misogyny, Rape, Sexism, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Suicide, Blood, Kidnapping, Death of parent, Gaslighting, Alcohol
Minor: Gun violence, Grief, Car accident, Pregnancy, Injury/Injury detail
adventurous
funny
lighthearted
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
Complicated
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Complicated
This was a really interesting and unique book! I could really really see this working as an 8-10 part mini series and thus was a bit lengthy at some points.
I found myself enjoying one of the MCs vastly more than the other 2 simply due to the time spent with them.
There is also a weird I think thinly veiled anti-abortion tiny side plot for about 3 pages that feels out of place but maybe I’m just misreading it.
I found myself enjoying one of the MCs vastly more than the other 2 simply due to the time spent with them.
There is also a weird I think thinly veiled anti-abortion tiny side plot for about 3 pages that feels out of place but maybe I’m just misreading it.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Murder
Moderate: Death, Suicide, Violence
Minor: Gun violence, Sexual content, Suicidal thoughts, Terminal illness, Medical content, Medical trauma, Car accident, Suicide attempt, Death of parent, Pregnancy, Sexual harassment
dark
funny
tense
slow-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
No
Loveable characters:
Complicated
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
No
Content Warnings
Graphic: Bullying, Death, Murder
Moderate: Gun violence, Suicide, Kidnapping, Gaslighting
adventurous
dark
funny
mysterious
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
A great mix of dark humor, thriller, and a little Hogwarts-esque fantasy! A little slow and predictable sometimes, but I can appreciate the base idea here, especially as a fan of horror and thriller comedies.
Kind of wish the end was a little more flushed out though. I’m glad to see the three characters reunite, but was almost too happy and predictable of an ending for what’s overall such a dark comedy. Was the love interest really necessary if it wasn’t going to be fully addressed or developed? Could the Dean really not see his own death coming? How many students are offered to come back as faculty like that?
Content Warnings
Graphic: Body horror, Death, Sexism, Sexual assault, Suicide, Violence, Blood, Stalking, Death of parent, Murder, Sexual harassment
Moderate: Gore, Gun violence, Pregnancy, Alcohol, Injury/Injury detail
adventurous
dark
funny
mysterious
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Plot
Strong character development:
Complicated
Loveable characters:
Complicated
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death, Emotional abuse, Gun violence, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Suicide, Toxic relationship, Transphobia, Violence, Forced institutionalization, Blood, Stalking, Death of parent, Murder, Sexual harassment, Injury/Injury detail
Moderate: Gore, Medical content, Grief, Medical trauma, Pregnancy, Alcohol