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archiveofrasa's review
reflective
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
despite this book not necessarily being a 5-star read for me, I'm really glad I read it. I have this urge to give it a higher rating with every other review I'm seeing at the moment, but I'm sticking to 4 stars.
no matter how unlikable this (unnamed) main character is, she feels so real on the page. she's contradictory, absolutely messy in the sense that if she was gen Z I know her peers would shun her online, and she's in so much unacknowledged pain. she unravels this pain slowly, empathetically that when she starts admitting it bit by bit, I felt this satisfaction growing, even though she continues to be flawed.maybe it's just me, but whenever she cheated, it wasn't like she was actively justifying it. I feel like a lot of people are implying this, but it's more matter of fact, described like an addiction, which is essentially what it is for this character.
going into this book, I expected to see more vignettes with her mother, but on my annotating reread, I realised her mother was indeed there, just in between the lines. that's ultimately what this book is about: the main character's relationship with her mother and how that's impacted her throughout the questionable choices she makes. the connections this has to her Palestinian roots, diaspora experiences, her sexuality and generally just lack of community, they were so interesting and heartbreaking. reading Arafat's interviews about this book definitely confirmed my thoughts on quite a few aspects of the novel and while there is a lot of subtlety I feel like went over my head, I really enjoyed it!
no matter how unlikable this (unnamed) main character is, she feels so real on the page. she's contradictory, absolutely messy in the sense that if she was gen Z I know her peers would shun her online, and she's in so much unacknowledged pain. she unravels this pain slowly, empathetically that when she starts admitting it bit by bit, I felt this satisfaction growing, even though she continues to be flawed.
going into this book, I expected to see more vignettes with her mother, but on my annotating reread, I realised her mother was indeed there, just in between the lines. that's ultimately what this book is about: the main character's relationship with her mother and how that's impacted her throughout the questionable choices she makes. the connections this has to her Palestinian roots, diaspora experiences, her sexuality and generally just lack of community, they were so interesting and heartbreaking. reading Arafat's interviews about this book definitely confirmed my thoughts on quite a few aspects of the novel and while there is a lot of subtlety I feel like went over my head, I really enjoyed it!
Content Warnings
Graphic: Eating disorder, Toxic relationship, Infidelity, and Emotional abuse
Moderate: Homophobia, Biphobia, and Addiction
D-slur is used once.fkshg8465's review against another edition
emotional
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
1.5
I had high expectations of this book. I wish I hadn’t, because then maybe I would’ve liked this book moss than I did. Terrible characters!
Content Warnings
Graphic: Gaslighting, Toxic relationship, Infidelity, Lesbophobia, Sexism, Drug use, Homophobia, Addiction, Biphobia, Abandonment, Alcohol, and Sexual content
dreareads_'s review
challenging
dark
emotional
inspiring
reflective
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
Beautiful and poignant look at mental health and mother/daughter relationships.
Our main character is Palestinian / American (never named), which leads to constant flashbacks to her summers in Palestine and her mothers own experience growing up. During the present timeline, our MC is dealing with her addiction to love, and her relationship with her mother who refuses to accept our MCs bisexuality. We see her learn to come to terms with her traumas, and create connections with those around her beyond her usual sexual and obsessive ones.
There is a lot of beautiful and personal introspection throughout the text, but it all gets lost with the constant time jumps. At times they all feel separate from each other, and it leaves you with a sense of vagueness, never truly getting to the root of each theme. The ending especially felt rushed, as we jump from relationship to relationship and the role of the mother (which seems to be the core relationship of the book) being put off to the side.
I could definitely relate to the mother/daughter relationship, as it reminded me of my own. Especially in regards to being a bisexual woc whose mother dismisses, ignores, or at worse condemns their sexuality. I was also moved by the exploration of the mother as an individual outside of her role as mom to remind us that she is just human and not some evil manipulative monster. I simply wish that we had had more interactions between mother and daughter in the present and not only in the past.
I will say, the title of this book? to me was the most powerful statement made. I think in some ways, I wish the book lived up to the title.
Our main character is Palestinian / American (never named), which leads to constant flashbacks to her summers in Palestine and her mothers own experience growing up. During the present timeline, our MC is dealing with her addiction to love, and her relationship with her mother who refuses to accept our MCs bisexuality. We see her learn to come to terms with her traumas, and create connections with those around her beyond her usual sexual and obsessive ones.
There is a lot of beautiful and personal introspection throughout the text, but it all gets lost with the constant time jumps. At times they all feel separate from each other, and it leaves you with a sense of vagueness, never truly getting to the root of each theme. The ending especially felt rushed, as we jump from relationship to relationship and the role of the mother (which seems to be the core relationship of the book) being put off to the side.
I could definitely relate to the mother/daughter relationship, as it reminded me of my own. Especially in regards to being a bisexual woc whose mother dismisses, ignores, or at worse condemns their sexuality. I was also moved by the exploration of the mother as an individual outside of her role as mom to remind us that she is just human and not some evil manipulative monster. I simply wish that we had had more interactions between mother and daughter in the present and not only in the past.
I will say, the title of this book? to me was the most powerful statement made. I think in some ways, I wish the book lived up to the title.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Addiction, Alcoholism, Biphobia, Toxic relationship, Eating disorder, Drug abuse, Drug use, Gaslighting, and Sexual content
coffeenoldbooks's review
emotional
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
Read for Pages4Palestine readathon
I first want to say that I really enjoyed this book and wasn’t what I was expecting. This book has a flawed protagonist who discusses their journey of being a bisexual Palestinian American who suffers from addiction and anorexia. She goes through her self destructive habits and trying to better herself even after sabotaging her relationships one after the other. She discovers a lot of her root cause is a very emotionally unavailable mother whom she craved love and affection from.
The bulk of the story is told while she is in rehab with flashbacks on where things went wrong for her and the decisions she made that she seemed to regret. She talks about her mother’s past and her childhood where she grew up in an occupied state and married young and gave up a lot of her dreams to only end up emotionally detached and regretting many things. We see how the protagonist understands this but does not pardon her mother for not being there and providing the love and affection she needed herself.
Other points of note in the book are talks of her feeling othered in many ways. Never feeling like she has a place to fit in. She is a Palestinian American and doesn’t fully feel like she fits in the American world but also not an Arabic world either. She feels like she has no place she truly belongs and it makes her longing for love an affection much deeper; craving some sense of belonging.
The one thing I do truly wish there was more talk about is the last relationship she has with Anouk. I’d love to know more of how they were able to come to trust eachother and find the love she was craving.
Overall, I really enjoyed this book and recommend it. I’d say to check some trigger warnings beforehand.
I first want to say that I really enjoyed this book and wasn’t what I was expecting. This book has a flawed protagonist who discusses their journey of being a bisexual Palestinian American who suffers from addiction and anorexia. She goes through her self destructive habits and trying to better herself even after sabotaging her relationships one after the other. She discovers a lot of her root cause is a very emotionally unavailable mother whom she craved love and affection from.
The bulk of the story is told while she is in rehab with flashbacks on where things went wrong for her and the decisions she made that she seemed to regret. She talks about her mother’s past and her childhood where she grew up in an occupied state and married young and gave up a lot of her dreams to only end up emotionally detached and regretting many things. We see how the protagonist understands this but does not pardon her mother for not being there and providing the love and affection she needed herself.
Other points of note in the book are talks of her feeling othered in many ways. Never feeling like she has a place to fit in. She is a Palestinian American and doesn’t fully feel like she fits in the American world but also not an Arabic world either. She feels like she has no place she truly belongs and it makes her longing for love an affection much deeper; craving some sense of belonging.
The one thing I do truly wish there was more talk about is the last relationship she has with Anouk. I’d love to know more of how they were able to come to trust eachother and find the love she was craving.
Overall, I really enjoyed this book and recommend it. I’d say to check some trigger warnings beforehand.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Emotional abuse, Mental illness, Addiction, Toxic relationship, Infidelity, Sexual content, War, Biphobia, Homophobia, and Colonisation
hellichipmunk's review
challenging
emotional
reflective
tense
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Gaslighting, Biphobia, Addiction, Colonisation, Eating disorder, Infidelity, Mental illness, Toxic relationship, and Emotional abuse
Minor: Sexism, Body shaming, Homophobia, Alcohol, Child abuse, Drug abuse, Genocide, Grief, Islamophobia, and Lesbophobia
saraellenme's review against another edition
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Infidelity, Biphobia, Addiction, and Emotional abuse
Moderate: Eating disorder, Alcohol, Xenophobia, and Adult/minor relationship
Minor: Suicidal thoughts, Outing, War, and Toxic relationship
nikia4's review
challenging
emotional
funny
reflective
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Xenophobia, Gaslighting, Infidelity, Addiction, Emotional abuse, Toxic relationship, Alcohol, and Sexual content
Moderate: Eating disorder, Biphobia, and Homophobia
Minor: Physical abuse, War, and Suicidal thoughts
hstcrow's review
emotional
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
2.5
I understand the main character’s central story is about her complicated relationships and many of them, but I felt we were really jumping around a lot between her love interests, especially towards the end, and it felt unrealistic and unnecessarily confusing. The best parts were her learning about her past trauma, her relationships with her family members and cultural history, but those were focussed on the least. Felt a bit unfinished in a few ways. Her dad is mentioned a lot, but honestly we don’t really know anything about him, and he sporadically comes into the story only to have that plot point dropped and then never explained. Maybe that’s meant to be reflective of her actual relationship with her dad, but it felt incomplete as a book.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Biphobia, Body shaming, Child abuse, Homophobia, and Toxic relationship
Moderate: Eating disorder
bisexualwentworth's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
An interesting portrait of a very messy, complicated main character. The unnamed protagonist is dealing with family issues, immigrant trauma, addiction, and internalized homophobia/biphobia. She forms unhealthy relationships. She tries to be better. The cycle repeats over and over. If you want a very messy bisexual book by a Palestinian author, this definitely fits the bill. It did get too repetitive for me at times, and I wanted more from certain aspects, but I would still recommend it.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Homophobia, Biphobia, Lesbophobia, and Addiction
bkschwartz's review
challenging
emotional
funny
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.0
Bookclub read, probably not one I would have chosen. It was very well written though. The story pops between present day and memories constantly. The lead is messy, a complex woman who self sabotages.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Addiction and Emotional abuse
Moderate: Eating disorder, Alcoholism, Biphobia, Sexual content, Infidelity, Homophobia, Lesbophobia, and Gaslighting