Reviews tagging 'Colonisation'

You Exist Too Much by Zaina Arafat

24 reviews

coffeenoldbooks's review

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emotional reflective medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

Read for Pages4Palestine readathon

I first want to say that I really enjoyed this book and wasn’t what I was expecting. This book has a flawed protagonist who discusses their journey of being a bisexual Palestinian American who suffers from addiction and anorexia. She goes through her self destructive habits and trying to better herself even after sabotaging her relationships one after the other. She discovers a lot of her root cause is a very emotionally unavailable mother whom she craved love and affection from. 

The bulk of the story is told while she is in rehab with flashbacks on where things went wrong for her and the decisions she made that she seemed to regret. She talks about her mother’s past and her childhood where she grew up in an occupied state and married young and gave up a lot of her dreams to only end up emotionally detached and regretting many things. We see how the protagonist understands this but does not pardon her mother for not being there and providing the love and affection she needed herself.

Other points of note in the book are talks of her feeling othered in many ways. Never feeling like she has a place to fit in. She is a Palestinian American and doesn’t fully feel like she fits in the American world but also not an Arabic world either. She feels like she has no place she truly belongs and it makes her longing for love an affection much deeper; craving some sense of belonging. 

The one thing I do truly wish there was more talk about is the last relationship she has with Anouk. I’d love to know more of how they were able to come to trust eachother and find the love she was craving. 

Overall, I really enjoyed this book and recommend it. I’d say to check some trigger warnings beforehand.

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hellichipmunk's review

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challenging emotional reflective tense slow-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? It's complicated
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0


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katharina90's review against another edition

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dark reflective slow-paced
  • Strong character development? It's complicated
  • Loveable characters? No
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes

2.0

The main character is unlikeable and frustrating. She treats others horribly, but throws a fit when she receives the same treatment. 

The trauma at the root of her harmful choices isn't explored in a way that works for me, and without seeing much of a change in behavior I found it difficult to care. 

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throwback682's review against another edition

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emotional slow-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? No
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.75

A bisexual Palestinian American codependent woman acts out her relationship with her abusive mother against various romantic partners. 

This book seemed to drag and then ended pretty abruptly. I didn’t really care about the protagonist; she wasn’t very sympathetic. But maybe she’s too much like me, I don’t know. 

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jartone93's review

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dark emotional reflective sad medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Strong character development? It's complicated
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.75


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noahsingh's review

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reflective medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.0

Interesting but couldn't hack the sheer amount of annoying men the main character was attached/attracted to.
The main interesting aspects to me (Palestinian heritage + relationship with their mother + the instances of Islamophobia/ acism & Zionism she faces) had very little space in the book.

Also I do think her outing that woman was unforgivable and I Hate Hate Hated that that (trigger warning) literal rapist white guy at The Lodge is, if anything, forgiven/absolved by the narrative. 

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twitchywitchy314's review

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emotional reflective sad fast-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.75


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bashsbooks's review

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emotional funny reflective medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.5

Enjoyed this book well enough. It was a nice exploration of the difference between love and obsession, the dysfunction between mother and daughter strewn across cultures, and those cultures that the daughter feels stretched between. 

I found the characters to be complex and well-fleshed, suited for the concepts they were exploring. I thought that who got names and who didn't was compelling and thought-provoking detail. 

That said, I think that it was somewhat lacking in balance in the scenes in which it spent lots of time with versus the times and places it skipped through. And I felt like the thread of the Ledge and the mental health aspect fell out of the plot a bit awkwardly. 

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courtneyfalling's review

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slow-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? It's complicated
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

This was such a weird book. I still have such mixed feelings. Very in the "sad girl" genre a la Ottessa Moshfegh. The main character is a TRIP but I feel like the subtle throughline of how the trauma of Palestinian diaspora amidst ongoing genocide intersects with her personal family experiences and childhood trauma as well as her relationship decision-making was well-crafted. My main issues are plot-related. The center is a strange interlude and her "love addiction" was written justtttt enough where I wasn't sure how critical the book wanted to be of the center. Lots of ambiguous space and reactions. Also
I feel like having a main character with difficulties forming overly intense emotional relationships too quickly, then busting apart, is not solved by her suddenly getting into a good intense emotional relationship, without entirely clarifying what separates her capacity to suppress her self-destructive interiority and truly commit to handling interpersonal conflict this time... especially in the context of ongoing genocide and diaspora
.

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jillaay_h's review

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challenging dark emotional reflective sad tense medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? It's complicated
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.0


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