Reviews with content warning for Homophobia - Vampires Never Get Old: Tales with Fresh Bite

This anthology was a bit average for me. There weren’t any outstanding reads, but neither were there many terrible ones. My favourite was Senior Year Sucks. I will review each story individually:

Seven Nights for Dying by Tessa Gratton: This is one of two problematic stories in this anthology. It featured a romance between a teenager and a vampire who was hundreds of years old and looked like they were 30. This story says it’s all about the right to choose to become a vampire, yet how could the teenage MC be in control of her choices if she was being groomed?

The Boys from Blood River by Rebecca Roanhorse: An atmospheric and compelling story ruined by its ending when the MC romanticises a murderer.

Senior Year Sucks by Julie Murphy: The MC of this story had great narrative voice, and the plot developed a philosophical question well. The romance was also cute.

The Boy and the Bell by Heidi Heilig: This was spooky and atmospheric and worked really well as a short story.

A Guidebook for the Newly Sired Desi Vampire by Samira Ahmed: The format of this story gave both a fun and unique approach to the subject material, and had a great take on vampires and colonisation.

In Kind by Kayla Whaley: This was a really confronting story with a powerful resolution, defying “mercy” killings and the ableist “magical cure” trope. The mixed media format also worked well.

Vampires Never Say Die by Zoraida Córdova and Natalie C. Parker: This was the second problematic story of the anthology. This is due to more grooming. Why on earth is it considered okay for a 200 year adult to be seeking friendship with a teenager?

Bestiary by Laura Ruby: In my opinion, this is the worst story of the non-problematic entries in this anthology. I simply didn’t understand the point of it. It was supposed to be related to animal companionship, but there was no plot or development generally, let alone one involving that concept.

Mirrors, Windows, and Selfies by Mark Oshiro: The blog format elevated the narrative, which was otherwise average.

The House of Black Sapphires by Dhonielle Clayton: This was incredibly atmospheric, but too much time was spent on the (albeit fantastic) worldbuilding, so that the plot felt squished in at the end as an afterthought. I think this concept would have worked better in a longer format.

First Kill by V.E. Schwab: I think this was a good story, but it was nearly identical to Senior Year Sucks which I found to be stronger.

Some final general notes. The first is that I am sick of YA modern vampire stories containing the immortal/mortal romance/friendship trope. This anthology even states it will be seeking to rectify the more problematic traditions in the vampire genre, yet it still includes this! Secondly, the editor’s notes at the end of each story were frustrating. Not only did it take you out of the fictional zone, but they should have been unnecessary, i.e., the story should have done a good enough job of showing its relevance to an aspect of the vampire tradition - and this often wasn’t the case. Finally, I listened to the audiobook for this one and it was also average. Some narrators were good; some, not so much.

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lynxpardinus's review against another edition

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adventurous dark funny

2.75

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sofipitch's review against another edition

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adventurous dark funny mysterious medium-paced

Diverse cast of characters? Yes

4.25

The collection was mostly just fun. Some stories I have strong opinions on, which I'll share, but the ones I don't mention were mostly just entertaining. I'm a sucker (haha) for vamps so I'm usually biased in the favor of vampire stories already.

Some stories I'd give 5 stars to: In Kind, A Guidebook for the Newly Sired Desi Vampire, and First Kill. I'm very excited for First Kill being adapted by Netflix, it's fun on it's own but I'm really looking forward to seeing this story expanded upon. In Kind deals with disabled rights and the value of a life and Guidebook deals with vampires as a metaphor for colonialism while staying really funny and original in concept.

The House of Black Sapphires is in a weird spot where I really likedit but it felt like it ended too abruptly, it honestly felt like the beginning of a full book and not a short story.

And then the bad ones were the ones that felt way to infantile. This collection is YA which means all the protagonists are teens, but these stories just felt like the authors assume teens lack any depth, and feel like they are belittling their reader with how they write them. They feel like it's more important to name drop words like instagram, selfie, and ao3 (which gave me massive brain damage) than connect with their audience. These stories that are total skips are: Vampires Never Say Die, Senior Year Sucks, and Mirrors, Windows & Selfies.

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caitlin_doggos's review

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adventurous dark emotional mysterious tense medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.0

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house_of_hannah's review

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adventurous funny lighthearted relaxing fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? N/A
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.25

Since this is a collection of short stories I will add a small summary of each one along with my rating. The average of all of the ratings is where the 3.25 came from.

Seven Nights For Dying by Tessa Gratton: About a teenage girl who is turned into a vampire over the course of 7 nights. She can stop at any time before the 7th night, so it goes through her thought process into becoming an immortal creature. 4 stars
The Boys From Blood River by Rebecca Roanhorse: About a gay teenage boy who is severely bullied by the jocks of his small town. He sees his savior in the legend of the Blood River Boys who are summoned if you dare to play their song. 4 Stars
Senior Year Sucks by Julie Murphy - About a vampire slayer who is captain of the cheerleading squad. On a bus home from an away game they pick up fellow students whose bus got a flat. She immediately senses a vampire in their midsts who turns out to be a high school student just like her. 2 stars. Weird insta-love implications, and just not really interesting.
The Boy & the Bell by Heidi Heilig: A trans student of medicine digs up the recently dead to be able to study anatomy at University. One evening he hears the bell chime of a recently buried teen, indicating that the boy had been buried alive. 4 stars
A Guidebook for the Newly Sired Desi Vampire by Samira Ahmed: An app that apparently pops up onto your phone if you are turned into a vampire. It reads like old people trying to be cool. I could not finish it, DNF
In Kind by Kayla Whaley: A father attempts to kill his 17 year old disabled daughter with a morphine overdose. Instead a vampire turns her to save her life. 3 Stars.
Vampires Never Say Die by Zoraida Cordova & Natalie C. Parker: Brittany & Theolinda are best friends on Instagram, but have never met face to face. Theo puts together a surprise birthday party for Brittany to finally meet, but when she realizes that all of the people showing up are vampires there may be more than just her friendship in danger. 3 Stars
Bestiary by Laura Ruby: Recently turned Jude works at the zoo where she can talk to animals. She freely goes into the enclosures with no worries. A water crisis threatens the well-being of the animals, as Jude deals with a thirst of her own. 4 ½ stars.
Mirrors, Windows & Selfies by Mark Oshiro: Cisco is a young vampire who lives in isolation with his parents. All his life his parents have told him it’s for his protection as vampires are not supposed to have children. When Cisco starts a blog about his life he soon discovers that he might not actually be alone. 4 Stars
The House of Black Sapphires by Dhonielle Clayton: A vampire family of 8 returns to their roots in New Orleans. Here there lies an underground city with 5 wards that house immortals. This is the first time the 6 sisters have seen this place, and they don’t understand why their mother ever left. Just exactly what secrets is she hiding? 4 ½ stars. The setting of this one is fantastic, and I would LOVE to see it made into an actual novel.
First Kill by V.E. Schwab: A teenage vampire and slayer end up having a crush on each other. When they are dared to spend 60 seconds in a closet together at a party will they come out alive or in love? 3 stars

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wardenred's review

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emotional mysterious medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.5

I confess I've been going through a terrible reading slump lately. This book of short stories has been a big help with that: whenever I felt like reading at all, I could just grab it and read another story. My relationship to short stories in general is complicated—I don't always like them, even when they're objectively well-written, because I'm more of an "epic sprawling story" kind of reader—but I always have a higher chance of liking one when it deals with one of my favorite topics, and vampires happen to be at least in the top-5 of my favorite things to read about. I can't help it; it's an obsession I never got over. I got through my teenage years watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer, reading Anne Rice and Laurel Hamilton, and playing Vampire: the Masquerade with my friends. I still play VtM with my friends a lot. Vampires really never get old.

The thing about anthologies that makes it hard rating them is that any of the stories contained in the book can be hit or miss. This one contained a lot more hits than misses for me. The book is full of fresh, fun takes on the vampire myth. I was delighted by the sheer amount of diversity here. Most of the main characters were somewhere on the LGBTQ+ spectrum, and there were other types of representation, too. A lot of the authors didn't shy away from choosing big, complicated topics to explore through the lens of undead bloodsuckers, be it something as expansive as colonialism or as claustrophobically private as the darkness that may be found in the relationships between disabled people and their caregivers.

The stories that stood out for me in particular were:

Seven Nights for Dying by Tessa Gratton: I've always been fascinated by fiction that deals with the transition from human to mythical monsters, and this story does a great job out of exploring it.
The Boys from Blood River by Rebecca Roanhorse: This was like watching a great horror movie in my head.
The Boy and the Bell by Heidi Heilig: I'm highly likely to enjoy anything that is set in Victorian times, deals with class differences, and has a trans MC, if it's well-written. This one was really well-written.
Bestiary by Laura Ruby: The prose here was viscerally vivid, to the point that it almost made me want to stop reading sometimes because I was seriously feeling everything in the story and a lot of it wasn't pleasant. Definitely an author I now want to read more of!

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booksthatburn's review

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dark emotional mysterious reflective medium-paced

Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.0

Vampires Never Get Old is a pretty strong collection of excellent vampire tales. No two mythos were exactly the same and I loved most of the stories.

I liked almost all of the collection, so first let me cover what I really enjoyed. Many of the stories had really powerful depictions of marginalized people finding strength during their interactions with vampires, sometimes by being vampires and sometimes through rejecting them. My particular favorites are "The Boys from Blood River", "In Kind", "Bestiary", and "Mirrors, Windows & Selfies". I love the premise and the feeling of "The Boys from Blood River", the MC handles relaying backstory while being firmly anchored in the moment in a way that immersed me very quickly into the story. The ending was really good, but now I want even more with the MC. "In Kind" gives a voice to a real kind of victim whose killers are frequently excused or even praised for their murder. It handles a difficult topic well through a really superb story. "Bestiary" was a slow burn, gradually trickling in details to make the MC's backstory clear, crystalizing in one fantastic moment when the pieces are finally in place to understand what happened. I never really felt confused leading up to it, but that moment of really understanding felt really good, especially in a tale this short. "Mirrors, Windows & Selfies" is a story about using the internet to feel a little less alone when you can't leave. I wish this had a follow-up I could read, it implies a very interesting variation on a lot of vampire lore and I'm fascinated (plus I really care what happens to the MC).

I cannot in good conscience recommend the final story, "First Kill". Minor spoilers to follow. It contains a gay character saying "People aren't straight... They just don't know better." I wasn't sure what to think about it as a one-off comment from a teenage character, but it erases a lot of people who are straight as well as queer, and it's a bizarre sweeping denial of people's understanding of their own identities. It's completely unchallenged within the narrative. The second thing which changed this from a story I was concerned about to one I cannot recommend is that

there's a character who is a monster-hunter, and in the backstory describing the monsters her family has killed, there's reference to a "full-grown wendigo" and a teenage character tries to take a "monstrous claw" as a prize. He's not allowed to because there's a general "no-trophies" rule.

Having that appear here just to add background details for a secondary character felt bad to read. The actual plot was interesting, but I can't recommend this collection without giving a warning about this story. Neither moment was examined, and they felt like they were there just to be filler about secondary characters, instead they're just cringey and bad.

Seven Nights for Dying: CW for

parental death (backstory).

The Boys from Blood River: CW for

homophobia, bullying, violence, parental death, death.

Senior Year Sucks: CW for

blood, death.

The Boy and the Bell: CW for

transphobia, misgendering, gore, death.

A Guidebook for the Newly Sired Desi Vampire: CW for

colonialism, death.

In Kind: CW for

ableism, child death, blood, death.

Vampires Never Say Die: CW for

sexism, blood, violence.

Bestiary: CW for

vomit, death (backstory).

Mirrors, Windows & Selfies: CW for

kidnapping, imprisonment, death.

The House of Black Sapphires: No major CWs.

First Kill: CW for

death.

TW for

discussion of body parts as trophies (wendigo).

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feuillycakes's review

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adventurous dark emotional fast-paced

Diverse cast of characters? Yes

4.5

This is this first anthology I’ve read since I was a child, and it didn’t disappoint. Each story brought something new and unexpected to the table, and I found myself liking each one in its own way. I’ve loved vampire stories since I was a child, and this new take on them was refreshing and exciting. The one thing I could wish for from this book is that some of the stories were longer. They set my imagination running wild and I found myself wanting more. My favourites were SEVEN NIGHTS FOR DYING , THE BOYS FROM BLOOD RIVER , and IN KIND, but they all brought something to the table that I can’t quite explain, except to say that they got me in my emotions and they did it quick. The latter two were also super dramatic and I’m in to that in a vampire story. A close contender for a favourite is BESTIARY , because the world building that occurs in this story is fantastic, what with a seemingly dystopian setting that is somehow also set in the near future but the very very near future.
Anyway this book is the diverse rep we always needed from teen vampire books so kudos to all the authors for being awesome!

(That being said there are brief descriptions of the negative stuff that comes along with being any variation of non cis/white/straight/able bodied in the world, so take care, but it’s not extreme and is shown to be a negative thing in the writing.)

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