Reviews tagging 'Gaslighting'

Detransition, Baby by Torrey Peters

17 reviews

fieldofhats's review against another edition

So, this is a lit fic novel. The prose are unnervingly and unnecessarily flowery at times, and there’s very little plot. The characterization is over-simplified in a way that’s made to look dramatic and realistic. For example, Reese liked being with Stanley because her perception of womanhood was contingent on the abuse that women face and thus felt affirmed being abused. If I was being kind I might say that this fucked-up view is representative of the weight and unyielding pressure of the patriarchy, and that its a brilliant look into the dark side of what it means to be a woman. But I have absolutely no love for lit fic and how it deals with topics like this, so I’m not going to be kind.

Reese is also simply unlikeable. I didn’t get far enough into the story, but I didn’t find Katrina to be very likable either. The only sympathetic character is Ames — and in a story about queerness, I think it’s extremely disingenuous to center a cis, detransitioned man in a story that is supposed to be about queerness.

And yes, I know that’s the point. I know that none of these characters are meant to be likable. But I also don’t care. I need at least one character to be a decent person, and we already established why the character Peters chose was problematic.

And as a minor note, the constant use of the word “transsexual” and the utter avoidance of “transgender” was unnerving and peculiar. It should have been my first clue to stop reading.

I thought perhaps that I would enjoy this novel because it’s about trans people by a trans author (as a trans fem person myself, I was naturally interested) — but I was sorely mistaken. Don’t get me wrong, the book isn’t bad because it’s trans. The book is bad because it does all the things that makes lit fic unbearable. There are better fiction novels about trans characters. Don’t bother with this one.

It’s pride month. Don’t read books that aren’t worth your time.

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Homophobia, Sexism, Miscarriage, Misogyny, Physical abuse, and Transphobia

Moderate: Gaslighting

shortstackz's review against another edition

challenging emotional slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.5

Parenthood looks and means something different to everyone, and Detransition, Baby dives into what that might look like to a cis woman, a trans woman, and a former trans woman. We take a dual viewpoint from Reese, a trans woman, and Ames, a former trans woman. Exploring how their experience of gender has shaped their views of parenthood. The dual timeline simultaneously covers the years across Reese and Amy's romantic relationship, and the weeks following Ames discovering he has gotten Katrina pregnant. I lov d that the story centered on the hopes and dreams of trans women without saying away from their struggles.

I am a cis woman, of white and Asian decent, which is the lens I was reading this through. Ames brought an interesting discussion of gender and gave me a better understanding of gender dysphoria and maybe the reasons someone would choose to live as their birth gender. The dual timeline of Reese and Ames brings so much light to the daily joys of trans life, which I think will help a lot of cis readers to grow alongside Katrina. I think this would have been strengthened from including vignets or interludes from Katrina's perspective, which could have shown how she was navigating her own journey through parental identity. Katrina makes choices. Those choices are, interesting? I have no idea how she jumps to them other than plot. 

The characters of Reese and Ames are so well developed that the lack of development in Katrina stands out as our main cast of 3. Peters prose is witty, funny, and easy to read. There are fun pop culture references thrown in throughout the pages, and I loved the nuanced gender conversations that occured. I wish Katrina's motivations were more clear to the reader, not front and center but in vignettes scattered throughout. 

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Suicide attempt, Deadnaming, and Transphobia

Moderate: Toxic relationship, Emotional abuse, Homophobia, Misogyny, Physical abuse, Ableism, Drug use, and Gaslighting

squishmallow161's review against another edition

emotional funny inspiring reflective sad fast-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? No

5.0

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Self harm, Homophobia, Physical abuse, Toxic relationship, and Transphobia

Moderate: Dysphoria, Gaslighting, and Outing

Minor: Miscarriage, Mental illness, and Suicide

cecilialau_'s review against another edition

3.75

It’s been confirmed that long chapters work against my experience of a book… Unfortunately.  I found it hard at times to pick this book back up while also really wanting to love it. There are some cracking narrative parts in it for sure throughout. I did also find some parts of it a bit long. Maybe it was a case of “wrong time” for me with this one atm. I’m really glad I read it though.

It’s a story that’s insightful and definitely worth telling (and absorbing) - as is anything outside the heteronormative btw. For ppl to learn and expand their horizons - including on the question on motherhood within and outside the lgbtq+ community.
I found the characters messy and flawed and unlikeable at time which worked really well to illustrate the (difficult) dynamic between the trio.

It didn’t sit right with me that Iris kept using the she/her pronoun with Ames even though it might have been a subtle way for the author to say that misgendering doesn’t just happen outside the trans community, but if so I found it too subtle as it wasn’t pointed out and I just thought it was disrespectful and unnecessarily mean (even though Iris dislikes Ames).

---

Content Warnings

Moderate: Deadnaming, Domestic abuse, Gaslighting, Outing, Mental illness, Physical abuse, Transphobia, and Violence

kyrstin_p1989's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional hopeful informative reflective sad tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

2.5

While interesting, I really struggled to get into this book. In part, I think it was the way it was written — the back and forth between characters and time periods made the book feel choppy and disconnected. The entire time I was reading, I never fell into the story. It just felt like I was reading — not experiencing it. The insights about being trans were the highlight for me. I felt deep sorrow for the characters who wanted so deeply to be themselves in ways society or biology would not allow. 

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Car accident, Emotional abuse, Racial slurs, Blood, Medical content, Misogyny, Miscarriage, Sexual content, Transphobia, Body horror, Body shaming, Homophobia, Abandonment, Deadnaming, Domestic abuse, Gaslighting, Grief, Injury/Injury detail, Lesbophobia, Toxic relationship, Biphobia, Pregnancy, Death, Suicide, Sexual harassment, Bullying, Outing, Physical abuse, Suicidal thoughts, Sexual violence, Abortion, Death of parent, Infidelity, and Sexism

squidknees's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional funny hopeful reflective medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.5

---

Content Warnings

Moderate: Abandonment, Alcohol, Body shaming, Bullying, Gaslighting, Grief, Homophobia, Infertility, Lesbophobia, Miscarriage, Outing, Abortion, Classism, Deadnaming, Death, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Hate crime, Drug use, Dysphoria, Misogyny, Physical abuse, Pregnancy, Self harm, Sexual content, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide attempt, Suicide, Toxic relationship, Toxic friendship, Transphobia, Violence, and Injury/Injury detail

annabulkowski's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional funny hopeful reflective sad tense medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Death of parent, Racism, Self harm, Sexual content, Suicidal thoughts, Homophobia, Mental illness, Misogyny, Suicide attempt, Abortion, Alcohol, Body shaming, Cultural appropriation, Dysphoria, Emotional abuse, Grief, Body horror, Car accident, Cursing, Fatphobia, Sexual violence, Toxic relationship, Death, Domestic abuse, Eating disorder, Sexual harassment, Infidelity, Lesbophobia, Panic attacks/disorders, Alcoholism, Biphobia, Hate crime, Suicide, Blood, Miscarriage, Police brutality, Sexism, Transphobia, Classism, Deadnaming, Gaslighting, Ableism, Adult/minor relationship, Bullying, and Pregnancy

kerrygetsliterary's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional informative reflective sad tense medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Miscarriage, Sexism, Alcohol, Cursing, Dysphoria, Fatphobia, Gaslighting, Infidelity, Pregnancy, Xenophobia, Body shaming, Cultural appropriation, Infertility, Sexual content, Violence, Deadnaming, Death, Grief, Homophobia, Medical content, Outing, Toxic relationship, Domestic abuse, and Transphobia

shirtypantser's review against another edition

dark reflective tense medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? No
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

0.75

The writing is good, the story is not. 

The premise is stupid (I don't say that lightly), the two trans characters are unlikeable and one is unredeemable. Racism, sexism both present on a regular basis in this. Author went pretty deep on fetishes but didn't quite pull off the point I think they were going for. I'm horrified this book is out there representing the trans fem community. This book gives the impression it was written by someone that doesn't actually like or much respect trans women.

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Racism, Toxic relationship, Transphobia, and Toxic friendship

Minor: Abortion, Alcoholism, Classism, Cultural appropriation, Fatphobia, Ableism, Body shaming, Deadnaming, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Emotional abuse, Gaslighting, Homophobia, Infidelity, and Physical abuse

ceilidhwilliams's review against another edition

emotional reflective medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Dysphoria, Grief, Homophobia, Pregnancy, Toxic relationship, Abortion, Deadnaming, Domestic abuse, Gaslighting, Infidelity, Miscarriage, Outing, Physical abuse, Toxic friendship, Transphobia, Self harm, and Sexual content