Reviews with content warning for Emotional abuse - In the Dream House: A Memoir

Reviews tagging 'Emotional abuse'

In the Dream House: A Memoir by Carmen Maria Machado

1126 reviews

luv4journey's review against another edition

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challenging dark emotional reflective sad tense medium-paced

4.25

Beautiful writing, some parts personally hit me hard. Amazing over all, definitely worth a read.

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rachaelcandoit's review against another edition

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emotional sad tense medium-paced

5.0

This story is heartbreaking and beautiful. I'm in love with the way this book is structured and written. There were many times I stopped and was absolutely struck by it, genuinely.

This memoir is also so incredibly important. As a queer person, I'm thankful that work like this exists and hope it can bring awareness to others.

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jazhandz's review against another edition

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challenging emotional tense medium-paced

5.0

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lpogo16's review against another edition

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dark emotional hopeful reflective sad medium-paced

5.0

Machado had a lot of courage in talking about her story and a lot of heart in telling the story of other queer women. This book really opened my eyes to a topic I never thought to look at head on.

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alloftaysreads's review against another edition

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dark emotional sad fast-paced

4.5

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jashanac's review against another edition

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4.5

Well. I read this in one sitting, which is not something I do often at ALL, and one of the only other times I have done so was reading Bad Romance by Heather Demetrios which is also a story of an abusive relationship. This is an experience I have unfortunately had in my own life, and I am always so hesitant/nervous to pick these types of books up, because I know I will cry at some point and be thrown back into the past, but I also clearly DEVOUR them due to how seen and validated I feel upon reading them.

I'm a bisexual woman but who has not ever been in a relationship with a woman and my own experience of abuse was with a man, so obviously the thematic elements discussing queerness and abuse in queer relationships and especially abuse in relationships between women, is not something I can relate to -- but while everyone who experiences abuse experiences it differently, there is so much about it that is familiar.

The structure of this memoir is definitely unique and will not be to everyone's taste. It wasn't even exactly to my taste all of the time, but any dislike I ever felt for the structure was overshadowed by the moments that struck me to my core. The scene where Machado describes

being screamed at and chased around the house by her ex, and locking herself in the bathroom while her abuser tries breaking the door down... only to come out later still crying and shaking to have her abuser say, "What's wrong? Why do you look so upset?"

made me start crying immediately. It's such a succinct way to explain the absolute mindfuckery of emotional and mental abuse -- let me terrify you and torment you and make you fearful for your safety... only to ask you why you're so upset. It makes you feel like you're living in an alternate reality Twilight Zone.

I did feel like there were several sections that felt a bit like "fluff" that I didn't personally think added to the thematic elements enough and that were not really adding to the "here is what abuse can look like and feel like" story being told either. That and the structure not always working for me are the reasons it's not a solid 5 stars for me.

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klsreads's review against another edition

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challenging dark emotional reflective sad tense medium-paced

5.0

In the Dream House is a masterpiece. Told in vignettes structured around literature tropes, this memoir follows the rise and fall of a profoundly abusive relationship. Machado is brave, vulnerable, and unflinchingly honest as she exposes the abuse she suffered across a 2 year relationship with another woman. She asks: if we view queer relationships as utopia divorced from patriarchy and hierarchy, are we being homophobic? Are lesbians not humans - complex, hurting, and capable of inflicting extreme harm? If we flatten a group of people into a monolith, we dehumanize them. This book is a necessary addition to the growing work on the incidence of abuse in queer relationships.

I've never read anything quite like this - I loved the vignette narrative structure. The book moved quickly because most sections were short. A couple of the tropes dragged on for me/didn't hit 100%, but I was enthralled and could hardly put it down. A few standouts for me - "Dream House as Deja Vu" (x3), "Dream House as Queer Villainy" (!!!), "Dream House as Bluebeard", "Dream House as the River Lethe", "Dream House as Choose Your Own Adventure" ...... ok, I have to stop or I'm going to quote half of this work.

Even more wild: I was in Iowa City as an undergrad during the events of this book. Did I see Carmen and the Woman from the Dream House at a coffee shop, at Obama's speech, in a bookstore? It makes me shiver, the ways people suffer out of view.

Brilliant. Carmen Maria Machado is an absolute force and a genius of prose and innovative structure. I HIGHLY recommend this book, but mind the CW's. Machado doesn't shy away from the gore at the heart of her story.

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