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5.32k reviews for:

Guards! Guards!

Terry Pratchett

4.25 AVERAGE


Everything I've come to love from Pratchett's Discworld.

Guards! Guards! by Terry Pratchett
HarperTorch, 1989
355 pages
Discworld; Fantasy; Comic
4.5/5 stars

Source: Library

Summary: A mysterious group decides to summon a dragon in order to overthrow the Patrician and install a king who will malleable to their will. Meanwhile Sam Vimes is an alcoholic captain of the laughable Watch who finds hidden strength when confronting this crisis. [But really the plot's not that important.]

Thoughts: After reading Thud, I really wanted to read more novels of the Watch. This is the first one focused on the Watch and it is far different from the much later Thud. Here the Watch is a joke with four (loyal) members; this is also the novel where he meets his wife, Lady Sybil who I adore. Their love story, which is not the focus if you're someone who doesn't like love stories, was my favorite part.

But there are also a lot of funny bits. Carrot is a human raised by dwarves who does not understand figures of speech and has tremendous strength. He is important to revitalizing the Watch. We also see Nobby and Colon who continue in the Guard. Then there is the Patrician, my third favorite Discworld character (after Death and Moist von Lipwig). He gets some great lines here and I loved getting to read more about him.

Overall: Another funny story with a bit of a romance that really elevates the book for me.

Quotes:
"A book has been taken. A book has been taken? You summoned the Watch...because someone's taken a book? You think that's worse than murder?" -Yes the Librarian does think that, p.108

"Never trust a ruler who puts his faith in tunnels and bunkers and escape routes. The chances are that his heart isn't in the job." -Sound advice from the Patrician, p. 286

Cover: Love the green! And the dragon is fitting.

A magnificent book. Million-to-one odds I would’ve put this book in my top five of all time, but it just might’ve worked. I feel like for the first time in my life, I’m aware of the exciting adventure that lies before me in reading the other 40 discworld novels.


Oook.

Of Terry Pratchett's reoccuring Discworld characters, my favorites are probably Vimes, The Patrician, and The Librarian, so this book, which introduces Vimes, and gives The Patrician and The Librarian more of a presence, as well as unusual circumstances, is one of my favorites.

The Intersection of an orphan brought up by a different race, a person bogged down by his job deciding to get his life together and improve his job's circumstances, a conniving magic abuser attempting to steal the throne, and the resurgence of an extinct or mythological creature returning to prominence, comes together perfectly.

I would be pleased, however, to never read the words "wassa wassa wassoname" again. It's one of Pratchett's ticks that annoyed me the first time I read it, and thuds to junk because it is too clunky to be vintage.

I recommend it to anyone looking for a good humorous fantasy book, fans of police procedurals, dragon enthusiasts, those who don't want to read the modern news but hope to see metaphors for it, and readers looking for some great quotes about politics, such as:

“I believe you find life such a problem because you think there are good people and bad people. You're wrong, of course. There are, always and only, the bad people, but some of them are on opposite sides.”

“Down there - he said - are people who will follow any dragon, worship any god, ignore any inequity. All out of a kind of humdrum, everyday badness. Not the really high, creative loathsomeness of the great sinners, but a sort of mass-produced darkness of the soul. Sin, you might say, without a trace of originality. They accept evil not because they say yes, but because they don't say no.”

“It was amazing, this mystic business. You tell them a lie, and then when you don’t need it anymore you tell them another lie and tell them they’re progressing along the road to wisdom. Then instead of laughing they follow you even more, hoping that at the heart of all the lies they’ll find the truth. And bit by bit they accept the unacceptable. Amazing.”

“Never build a dungeon you wouldn't be happy to spend the night in yourself."

“But we were dragons. We were supposed to be cruel, cunning, heartless and terrible. But this much I can tell you, we never burned and tortured and ripped one another apart and called it morality.”

I would recommend reading a page or two beforehand to see if Terry Pratchett's writing style is to your liking. It's a fun style, but maybe not for everyone.

This book is a fun, witty tale that follows the adventures of the much mocked Night Watch as they reluctantly investigate the appearance of a dragon in their city. Between the puns and the off-the-wall writing there is a lot of commentary about humans and their nature which emerges. I enjoyed reading about the people in the city of Ankh-Morpork. Watching different characters and sections of town go about their daily lives (albeit with a dragon on the loose), and the strange inner-workings that keeps their city ticking.

Classic Discworld :-)
adventurous funny lighthearted relaxing slow-paced
Plot or Character Driven: A mix
Strong character development: Yes
Loveable characters: Yes
Diverse cast of characters: Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus: Complicated

Laugh out loud funny

A great introduction to the Watch, Patrician and Vines's relationship, which influences many of the plots in later books.
funny lighthearted medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven: A mix
Strong character development: Yes