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marieintheraw's review
3.0
Sometimes I like to try and read outside my comfort zone. In this case that decision boils down to a "it's not you, it's me" situation when it comes to the rating.
jackiehorne's review
4.0
See full review at:
http://romancenovelsforfeminists.blogspot.com/2017/05/the-feminism-of-pain-sarah-taylor-woods.html
http://romancenovelsforfeminists.blogspot.com/2017/05/the-feminism-of-pain-sarah-taylor-woods.html
booksinrain's review
reflective
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? N/A
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
2.5
This is not the first book I have read in this genre, but this book did not resonate with me at all. One reason is probably the fact that this is the very first book of this author, therefore grammatical mistakes and sudden shifts in plot are seen in this book. In my opinion, author did not do well in mixing the main character's internal monologue and the actual plot of this book regarding starting a relationship involving BDSM elements. Also, the relationship started "very" early, so slow-burn lovers will not like that aspect.
bookish_notes's review
3.0
Initial Reaction: Loved Talia and Sean together, but the last half of the book and almost every supporting character was a drag. I loved that we have a Jewish MC and it's just such a natural part of her daily life and that Sean totally respects all her boundaries. The psychiatrist and her parents are basically the worst though.
Full Review:
There are many great parts to this book, but I'm not sure I can say that I like this book as a whole. The main characters, Talia and Sean, are electric and have ridiculous chemistry together. I love Talia and I love Sean. But boy, most of the secondary characters are the absolute worst. I also don't think I'm a fan of these types of stories, even though I recognize that they're important stories for people to read? I'm not talking about the BDSM D/s relationship aspect, but I just don't like all the invalidation and gaslighting by the other characters towards the MC? It was infuriating and exhausting to read the entire last half of this book. I get that there are people who aren't going to understand the relationship Talia and Sean have, but do I really want to read about it? Some people might and want to experience that journey with the characters, and that's awesome. This book is for you. But, as it is, this kind of story just really isn't my thing.
Trigger warning: This book contains depictions and talk about cutting.
Talia is a junior in college and stuck in a path to getting an MBA as a deal for her dad to pay for her school. It's not what she wants to do with her life and she hates her classes, but she's stuck. She takes anthropology classes as her extracurriculars and after being invited by one of her professors on a lunch outing, she meets graduate student Sean.
There's not much by way of plot in this story. What this book focuses on is the relationship between Talia and Sean. Talia has known from a very young age that she likes pain, likes rules, but she's also remarkably independent and don't know how to merge the two things together in her life. When she meets Sean, he's everything she's ever wanted. He's caring, respects the hell out of boundaries, and is able to inflict the right amount of pain she needs. It's a healthy relationship. It's sexy and kinky and Talia and Sean are so right together. Talia wants to be loved and Sean is there to give it to her.
But the problem is that she had an awful support network and love does not come from anyone else in her life. Not her therapist, not her mother, especially not her father, and not even her best friend. It's awesome that they're concerned about Talia and are willing to show concern that they mistakenly assume she's in an abusive relationship, but they don't listen to her or try to understand where she's coming from. I think this book is great for people of all ages to read and realize that they're not weird, and wanting pain, for wanting someone else to inflict it on them as long as there are boundaries? This is normal and can be attainable with the right person.
I love that Talia is Jewish and that this isn't a plot point, but just who she is. When she tells Sean that she can't do something because of her faith, he listens and respects her decision, no questions asked. We get to see a lot of learning moments about the Jewish customs and faith, and I loved reading about it all.
Talia works out a lot, because she likes pushing herself, becasue of endrophins and the burning musclar pain after a long workout. This story goes around naming muscles like everyone should know what they are? Maybe I didn't pay attention enough back in elementary school PE, but does everyone just drop "trapezius" into everyday conversations? There are just some oddly muscle-naming moments during the sex scenes that took me way out of the story.
I feel like there were some weird moments in this book where it's like scenes were cut? One minute Talia has no idea what age Sean is, and the next, she knew that he was 27. This book also strangely goes into We never hear that she introduced her parents that she was dating Sean, but he's suddenly going with her to family Thanksgiving dinners? Although, this last one might be a result of reading way more m/m romance novels than m/f, but it seems weird that the initial introduction of the boyfriend to the parents is no big deal at all. There's also a random moment where Talia runs into a friend of hers, Brandon, near the end of the book, and it was just weird because she's kind of a mess of feels and he's all, 'say hello to your roommate for me'? Unless, of course, it was a one-liner to set-up book two for Mallory (Talia's best friend and roommate) and Brandon? Who knows?
And SPOILER...there's also the fact that Sean is a TA and he says that it's unethical for him and Talia to be together the semester he's teaching her class. They've broekn up at this point, but if they were still together and she couldn't transfer out of his class, I don't know how that would have turned out? Would it stilll be unethical since they were dating before she winded up in a class he was a TA for? I am just full of questions.
Small things I had to roll my eyes at includes the introduction of Sean's roommate, Brooks Hamada. He's merely said to be "Asian" but is he Japanese? I guess we'll never know. A few pages later, we get an unnecessary description that Sean's bookshelves and desk are from Wal-Mart (like, why would Talia even know that), so why couldn't Brooks ethnicity be clarified? There's also yet another unnecessary throwaway moment where colored dots are assigned to different ethnic groups as part of Sean's PhD dissertation that doesn't sit well with me at all. Yes, I'm probably looking too much into this last bit, but it was also not necessary to include into the book at all, so I'm pointing out this passage anyways, "Communities of color. Red ones are all Cherokee. Purple ones are Freedmen. Blue ones are African-American communities. Green ones are other Native communities. Yellow is filed under 'other.'"
Talia's psychiatrist is awful times a million and should have been fired a long time ago, especially after Talia tells her therapist that her father is emotionally abusing her and the thearpist's professional opinion is to say, "If you know it's coming it should be less effective." SERIOUSLY. There's a lot of moments, like every interaction with Dr. Oliver, that was gross and sounded more like the therapist was on a powertrip than listening to what Talia had say.
The epilogue was nice and I loved Talia and Sean together. Their scenes together are hot and I loved that he calls her "cupcake" and that he listens to her. Reading daddy kink isn't really my thing, but it works for Talia and Sean, so it's whatever. The two characters are great, and the story is only told from Talia's POV and I would have loved Sean's, but I don't think we're missing out by not having the story told from his perspective. Talia had a lot of unresolved baggage going into their relationship, so it wasn't a surprise to see that she needed time to process her emotions and find what she's herself and what out what she is and isn't okay with. Sean never tries to control her life (like what she eats or who she hangs out with) and is really a sweet, sexy, and a loving Dom.
Overall, I think Hold Me Down would be enjoyable for readers new to reading D/s books.
Full Review:
There are many great parts to this book, but I'm not sure I can say that I like this book as a whole. The main characters, Talia and Sean, are electric and have ridiculous chemistry together. I love Talia and I love Sean. But boy, most of the secondary characters are the absolute worst. I also don't think I'm a fan of these types of stories, even though I recognize that they're important stories for people to read? I'm not talking about the BDSM D/s relationship aspect, but I just don't like all the invalidation and gaslighting by the other characters towards the MC? It was infuriating and exhausting to read the entire last half of this book. I get that there are people who aren't going to understand the relationship Talia and Sean have, but do I really want to read about it? Some people might and want to experience that journey with the characters, and that's awesome. This book is for you. But, as it is, this kind of story just really isn't my thing.
Trigger warning: This book contains depictions and talk about cutting.
Talia is a junior in college and stuck in a path to getting an MBA as a deal for her dad to pay for her school. It's not what she wants to do with her life and she hates her classes, but she's stuck. She takes anthropology classes as her extracurriculars and after being invited by one of her professors on a lunch outing, she meets graduate student Sean.
There's not much by way of plot in this story. What this book focuses on is the relationship between Talia and Sean. Talia has known from a very young age that she likes pain, likes rules, but she's also remarkably independent and don't know how to merge the two things together in her life. When she meets Sean, he's everything she's ever wanted. He's caring, respects the hell out of boundaries, and is able to inflict the right amount of pain she needs. It's a healthy relationship. It's sexy and kinky and Talia and Sean are so right together. Talia wants to be loved and Sean is there to give it to her.
Honestly? I hated it. I hated how much I loved it. How much I knew I needed it.
But the problem is that she had an awful support network and love does not come from anyone else in her life. Not her therapist, not her mother, especially not her father, and not even her best friend. It's awesome that they're concerned about Talia and are willing to show concern that they mistakenly assume she's in an abusive relationship, but they don't listen to her or try to understand where she's coming from. I think this book is great for people of all ages to read and realize that they're not weird, and wanting pain, for wanting someone else to inflict it on them as long as there are boundaries? This is normal and can be attainable with the right person.
"You're not a freak. You're not weird. You're not broken. Okay? What you want is real, normal, and attainable."
I love that Talia is Jewish and that this isn't a plot point, but just who she is. When she tells Sean that she can't do something because of her faith, he listens and respects her decision, no questions asked. We get to see a lot of learning moments about the Jewish customs and faith, and I loved reading about it all.
Talia works out a lot, because she likes pushing herself, becasue of endrophins and the burning musclar pain after a long workout. This story goes around naming muscles like everyone should know what they are? Maybe I didn't pay attention enough back in elementary school PE, but does everyone just drop "trapezius" into everyday conversations? There are just some oddly muscle-naming moments during the sex scenes that took me way out of the story.
I feel like there were some weird moments in this book where it's like scenes were cut? One minute Talia has no idea what age Sean is, and the next, she knew that he was 27. This book also strangely goes into We never hear that she introduced her parents that she was dating Sean, but he's suddenly going with her to family Thanksgiving dinners? Although, this last one might be a result of reading way more m/m romance novels than m/f, but it seems weird that the initial introduction of the boyfriend to the parents is no big deal at all. There's also a random moment where Talia runs into a friend of hers, Brandon, near the end of the book, and it was just weird because she's kind of a mess of feels and he's all, 'say hello to your roommate for me'? Unless, of course, it was a one-liner to set-up book two for Mallory (Talia's best friend and roommate) and Brandon? Who knows?
And SPOILER...there's also the fact that Sean is a TA and he says that it's unethical for him and Talia to be together the semester he's teaching her class. They've broekn up at this point, but if they were still together and she couldn't transfer out of his class, I don't know how that would have turned out? Would it stilll be unethical since they were dating before she winded up in a class he was a TA for? I am just full of questions.
Small things I had to roll my eyes at includes the introduction of Sean's roommate, Brooks Hamada. He's merely said to be "Asian" but is he Japanese? I guess we'll never know. A few pages later, we get an unnecessary description that Sean's bookshelves and desk are from Wal-Mart (like, why would Talia even know that), so why couldn't Brooks ethnicity be clarified? There's also yet another unnecessary throwaway moment where colored dots are assigned to different ethnic groups as part of Sean's PhD dissertation that doesn't sit well with me at all. Yes, I'm probably looking too much into this last bit, but it was also not necessary to include into the book at all, so I'm pointing out this passage anyways, "Communities of color. Red ones are all Cherokee. Purple ones are Freedmen. Blue ones are African-American communities. Green ones are other Native communities. Yellow is filed under 'other.'"
Talia's psychiatrist is awful times a million and should have been fired a long time ago, especially after Talia tells her therapist that her father is emotionally abusing her and the thearpist's professional opinion is to say, "If you know it's coming it should be less effective." SERIOUSLY. There's a lot of moments, like every interaction with Dr. Oliver, that was gross and sounded more like the therapist was on a powertrip than listening to what Talia had say.
The epilogue was nice and I loved Talia and Sean together. Their scenes together are hot and I loved that he calls her "cupcake" and that he listens to her. Reading daddy kink isn't really my thing, but it works for Talia and Sean, so it's whatever. The two characters are great, and the story is only told from Talia's POV and I would have loved Sean's, but I don't think we're missing out by not having the story told from his perspective. Talia had a lot of unresolved baggage going into their relationship, so it wasn't a surprise to see that she needed time to process her emotions and find what she's herself and what out what she is and isn't okay with. Sean never tries to control her life (like what she eats or who she hangs out with) and is really a sweet, sexy, and a loving Dom.
Overall, I think Hold Me Down would be enjoyable for readers new to reading D/s books.
missamandamae's review
4.0
This is most definitely NOT my usual reading fare, but it got recommended in a Twitter feed and I was apparently in the perfect mood to read it. I kinda seriously loved the two protagonists and their relationship outside the bedroom, and since I'm not all that into lots of sexual content in the books I read, I skimmed over those parts. It was well-written enough for me to do that, and I think that says a lot about the author and the story. This was a healthy relationship, a fun relationship, and since I already have a thing for PhDs (and any story set in South Carolina) it fit into my milieu quite well. ;)
rchll's review
challenging
emotional
funny
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
3.25
andreacaro's review
4.0
I don't know how I found out about this book, but it was excellent, particularly for a genre that regularly makes me cringe.
First of all, I love that the MC was Jewish and it was an important part of her life. She wouldn't skip synagogue to go on a date. She refused dessert because she didn't want to mix dairy with meat.
Another thing the MC did was choose her friends over her man. She didn't make her whole world about this guy and yeah, it was a little insta-lovey, but I kind of expect that in erotica.
It was just well-written and feminist and fantastic.
First of all, I love that the MC was Jewish and it was an important part of her life. She wouldn't skip synagogue to go on a date. She refused dessert because she didn't want to mix dairy with meat.
Another thing the MC did was choose her friends over her man. She didn't make her whole world about this guy and yeah, it was a little insta-lovey, but I kind of expect that in erotica.
It was just well-written and feminist and fantastic.
bayy245's review
5.0
Wow. I one clicked this book without reading even the description and man was I in for a treat. I picked it up on a whim and the first page sucked me in. I couldn't ( and didn't) put this book down. It was sexy and delicious. Even if you don't have the same taste in the bedroom as Talia and Sean, I think there's a lot you can connect too.
Halfway through, I was dreading what the drama was going to be. I was expecting it to follow a usual romance pattern but boy was I wrong. This wasn't "drama" or cheating or he said she said this was a legitimate problem and a legitimate journey that Talia needed to go on. I hope to god there's more to their story.
Halfway through, I was dreading what the drama was going to be. I was expecting it to follow a usual romance pattern but boy was I wrong. This wasn't "drama" or cheating or he said she said this was a legitimate problem and a legitimate journey that Talia needed to go on. I hope to god there's more to their story.
anudd02's review
challenging
emotional
funny
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.25
claire_michelle18's review
3.0
TW in this book for self-harm and abusive parent relationships.
There were a lot of things I liked about this. Talia is a really interesting main character, she's strong, she's resilient, she's flawed, she's conflicted about her kinks. It was also really interesting to see a Jewish main character, particularly one who's religion is portrayed not as a plot point but as a very normal part of her life. The relationship she and Sean have is very intense but very loving, fun and healthy from the outset. His desire to care for her comes clearly from a place of love not of control which is very different from certain other BDSM romance stories.
A few small niggles though. Talia's therapist basically gaslights her into making her think she's in an abusive relationship, insists she needs to take anti-depressants, then betrays her confidentiality to tell her mother when she doesn't. I also found Talia's support network a bit baffling - very quickly jumping to the conclusion that she was being abused but then equally quickly seemingly getting over it by the end of the book. Neither of those reactions really felt right.
There were a lot of things I liked about this. Talia is a really interesting main character, she's strong, she's resilient, she's flawed, she's conflicted about her kinks. It was also really interesting to see a Jewish main character, particularly one who's religion is portrayed not as a plot point but as a very normal part of her life. The relationship she and Sean have is very intense but very loving, fun and healthy from the outset. His desire to care for her comes clearly from a place of love not of control which is very different from certain other BDSM romance stories.
A few small niggles though. Talia's therapist basically gaslights her into making her think she's in an abusive relationship, insists she needs to take anti-depressants, then betrays her confidentiality to tell her mother when she doesn't. I also found Talia's support network a bit baffling - very quickly jumping to the conclusion that she was being abused but then equally quickly seemingly getting over it by the end of the book. Neither of those reactions really felt right.