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3.83 AVERAGE
3.83 AVERAGE
dark
reflective
sad
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Complicated
Loveable characters:
No
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
'Mijn Fantomen'.
De titel dekt de lading.
En dat is het probleem.
Want haar fantomen laten mij koud.
Wie een moeilijke relatie met een ouder heeft, struikelt misschien af en toe over een twijgje herkenbaarheid, maar Riley's al dan niet gefictionaliseerde moeder is dusdanig hardvochtig dat het je volstrekt onverschillig laat wat haar overkomt. Om van het afstandelijke ik-figuur nog maar te zwijgen.
Om mee te huilen met een personage moet je er toch ergens een zweem van sympathie voor hebben.
Maar ik voel niets.
Laat staan fantoompijn.
fast-paced
reflective
sad
medium-paced
dark
emotional
sad
slow-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
No
Loveable characters:
Complicated
Diverse cast of characters:
Complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
challenging
dark
emotional
reflective
sad
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Complicated
Loveable characters:
No
Diverse cast of characters:
No
fast-paced
A deep dive into the fractured relationship between mother and daughter. At first I thought it was a decent read, the characters were so vivid and real. However as I read other reviews and thought on this a while longer, I began to notice the intention of a first person perspective from that of the daughter.
The daughter, Bridget, talks to her mother as if she is playing some game. She tries to find the right words to say and is annoyed at herself when she believes she has said the wrong thing. She speaks of her mother almost as this entirely separate person from herself. The most interesting details though are in the things left unsaid. Why she continues to see her mother whilst clearly not enjoying her company and insistence on having her mother have zero contact with any aspect of her own life. Why she and her sister hardly interact. It's left to the reader to question Bridget's reliability in her portrayal of her family.
The daughter, Bridget, talks to her mother as if she is playing some game. She tries to find the right words to say and is annoyed at herself when she believes she has said the wrong thing. She speaks of her mother almost as this entirely separate person from herself. The most interesting details though are in the things left unsaid. Why she continues to see her mother whilst clearly not enjoying her company and insistence on having her mother have zero contact with any aspect of her own life. Why she and her sister hardly interact. It's left to the reader to question Bridget's reliability in her portrayal of her family.
dark
emotional
funny
reflective
sad
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Complicated
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
I wavered between a 4 and a 5-star review for this, but in the end, the impact on me was so thunderous a 5 seemed the only option. This brief book is an episodic overview of the relationship between our narrator, Bridget, and her mother. To a lesser extent, Bridget's relationship to her father is explored, but mostly we see it as a substantial factor in building Bridget's antipathy for and separation from her mother. She was angry with her mother for things she did, but angrier by far that her mother did not protect her from her father's narcissism and related cruelty. For her own part, Bridget's mother is obsessed with her own unhappiness. She has a clear idea of what her life should be like and tries to play at living that life rather than connecting with the life she has or finding out what actually gives her pleasure. I watched my mother perform life rather than living it, and I can say for certain it is a foolproof recipe for anxiety and depression and for making your children feel defective and unliked. Bridget, once she is an adult, plays at trying to please her mother, taking her to nice restaurants she perceives as being what she wants when in fact those visits are ways to show her mother her own success (which is as false and performative for Bridget as her mother's actions are.) Bridget is then bitter and angry when her mother does not enjoy the outings and responds in the expected passive-aggressive manner. All of this is conveyed through small moments. Nothing happens in the book, and yet everything happens in the book. In the end, Bridget is as unloving a caretaker as her mother was, wearing the heavy weight of her duty, her martyrdom, for all to see.
As I said, this was very personal for me. I thought about a lot of things I have chosen not to think about much since my parents' long-ago deaths. I expect to keep thinking about those things for some time to come. I am not sure I am pleased about this, I was happy not dealing with all of that, but my own spoiled compartmentalization efforts do not change the fact that this book accomplished its goals with literary elegance and precision. If this sort of exploration appeals to you, I can say I cannot imagine it being done better. I don't know if I enjoyed the read, but its impact was profound.
As I said, this was very personal for me. I thought about a lot of things I have chosen not to think about much since my parents' long-ago deaths. I expect to keep thinking about those things for some time to come. I am not sure I am pleased about this, I was happy not dealing with all of that, but my own spoiled compartmentalization efforts do not change the fact that this book accomplished its goals with literary elegance and precision. If this sort of exploration appeals to you, I can say I cannot imagine it being done better. I don't know if I enjoyed the read, but its impact was profound.