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onamoonbeam's review against another edition
dark
emotional
inspiring
reflective
tense
medium-paced
5.0
oh! so that's why this author's famous! moment. read a few excerpts of this for a creative writing class and loved them months ago, finally got around to reading the whole thing. the mastery machado has over language is. absurd. somehow lots of colloquial language to illustrate swathes of emotion and history that will be rattling around in my mind for who knows how long. she also likes the word eponymous, which i will now actually remember the definition of.
notable bits
notable bits
- as a trope lover, the fact the memoir is formatted like this at all is already fantastic, not to mention. literally everything else
- the three deja vu chapters are marked in my book, and i flipped between them, reading their corresponding sentences in order in awe of oh. everything in this book is put together with intention, and this is just a small piece of it.
- the choose your own adventure part with the
(multiple!!) pages that say smth like 'you should not be on this page, there was no way to get to it with the choices provided. you wanted to get out/you can't get out, this already happened/were you looking for a way out' ARE SO GOOD i love when authors use their mediums to the fullest because in what other format could that exist? it reminded me of some pieces of interactive fiction, where choice being given and then taken away, or pointing out the illusion of choice, is more impactful than starting out with no choice to begin with. -
the use of footnotes in reference to folklore and foreshadowing is *chef's kiss* both opposite and adjacent to the princess bride to me. some of them, esp the one of 'mother killing her child' i gasped at -
pointing out that the language we use to describe abuse is so trite that horrible experiences seem banal, then pointing out a specific experience -
magical realism almost? of her experiences after the breakup, shrinking and drowning in tears and finding solace in animals -
"We deserve to have our wrongdoing represented as much as our heroism, because when we refuse wrongdoing as a possibility for a group of people, we refuse their humanity" AAAGH -
explicit separation of "you" and "i" in one chapter that continues for the rest of the book, works to 1. separate her experiences at the time of the relationship and at other points in her life 2. a marker of her growth 3. everything becomes deeply personal to the reader. you are running/dreaming/hiding. do you understand, now? -
"Part of the problem was, as a weird fat girl, you felt lucky." the elementary school me is pounding the floor of my heart, ie. when I read that I gripped the book a little tighter - HOUSE AND SPACE METAPHORS
something about this is peak english major to me, and i mean that as a compliment. guess i gotta go read her body and other parties now
Content Warnings
Graphic: Sexual content, Emotional abuse, Domestic abuse, Gaslighting, Toxic relationship, and Grief
Minor: Infidelity, Sexual violence, and Suicidal thoughts
milenagallo's review against another edition
dark
reflective
sad
fast-paced
4.5
Content Warnings
Graphic: Domestic abuse and Emotional abuse
amandarosexox's review against another edition
dark
emotional
medium-paced
4.0
The use of different techniques/limitations/inspirations for each chapter was very inspired and well executed, making the book even more engaging for the reader.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Domestic abuse
Moderate: Sexual assault, Toxic relationship, Gaslighting, and Infidelity
kc_gilbert's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
informative
reflective
sad
tense
slow-paced
4.25
Content Warnings
Graphic: Sexism, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Emotional abuse, Sexual assault, and Domestic abuse
fayemomodu's review against another edition
emotional
informative
reflective
medium-paced
5.0
Absolutely love this book. As someone who attending college at the University of Iowa I loved reading this as it takes place in Iowa City at the college. The book almost reads as poetry and is very beautiful written.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Emotional abuse, Gaslighting, Hate crime, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Sexual assault, Toxic relationship, Suicidal thoughts, Transphobia, Animal cruelty, Domestic abuse, Physical abuse, Sexual harassment, Sexual violence, Addiction, Alcoholism, and Body shaming
anaheeta's review against another edition
dark
emotional
sad
tense
medium-paced
5.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Emotional abuse, Homophobia, Hate crime, Death, Toxic relationship, and Domestic abuse
Moderate: Fatphobia
clovetra's review against another edition
challenging
dark
informative
medium-paced
4.0
i feel it very hard to summarise this book. especially seeing as it is a biography about domestic violence.
reading this book was very conflicting. at times, i hated the lyrical and vague writing presented, with abstract concepts plaguing this book, confusing the shit out of me. at other times, i adored the intrinsic thoughts of machado presented, and the format of the story aided in presenting how machado felt.
i absolutely adored the choose your own adventure portion & the mini excerpts about queer history & abuse. i think i spent a solid 10 minutes pondering the choose your own adventure section. it felt so perfect for this book. the excerpts explaining abuse in queer communities was a great addition, with machado linking the stories to her experiences.
i didn’t really enjoy how this story jumps every where, and a lot of points are repetitive. the repetitive nature is probably a deeper commentary on the cycle of domestic violence i am too naive to discern, but it was frustrating as a reader. it kind of reminded me of “a woman is no man” by etaf rum in that sense - yes, these are novels based in truth, and domestic violence isn’t as simple as leaving. on a purely artistic form, this book was a beautiful explanation of the back and forth present with dv victims. but as a reader it was a difficult read.
i do think this book has taught me a lot, especially within myself and a lot of lesbian history i didn’t know (shakes head at self). i do also think this book was beautifully written and something every queer person should read. but i don’t know i find there are a lot of “drawbacks” that i can’t even put a name to regarding this book. it’s so lyrical in nature it’s hard to describe what i loved & what i didn’t.
i feel awful saying all these things because it’s a memoir!!!! this shit is real!!!!!! i am not just critiquing words on a page i’m critiquing someone’s lived experiences!!!!! but i can’t lie and praise this book till the cows come home. i don’t know i feel like this review is a bit scummy seeing as this is based in reality
Content Warnings
Graphic: Sexual content, Domestic abuse, Violence, and Toxic relationship
Moderate: Homophobia, Sexual assault, Physical abuse, Gaslighting, and Drug use
Minor: Pregnancy
mandaleigh's review against another edition
emotional
reflective
fast-paced
5.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Emotional abuse
Moderate: Domestic abuse
Minor: Homophobia
snakem's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
informative
reflective
sad
medium-paced
Content Warnings
Graphic: Domestic abuse
kaimju's review against another edition
dark
emotional
reflective
sad
tense
medium-paced
5.0
„In the pit of it, you fantasize about dying. Tripping on a sidewalk and stumbling into the path of an oncoming car… Anything to make it stop. You have forgotten that leaving is an option" </3
Content Warnings
Graphic: Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, and Toxic relationship
Moderate: Biphobia and Homophobia
Minor: Sexual assault