Scan barcode
jenna_x_w's review against another edition
3.0
To my mind, this little memoir was really akin to three books in one, which could be both a strength and a weakness.
Its FIRST function was to be a "book about books and reading" kind of book. I know there are a lot of folks who love these; I'll admit they're not my fave. However, this book offered up an interesting take on the genre: You get a lot of time when you’re doing time, so within the realm of your control, on what specific reading will you spend that time?
This premise resonated with me to the extent that it was probably the reason I bought the book in the first place (in addition to the awesome trompe l'oeil cover). Nearly immediately upon completing a book, I can typically be seen wandering up and down the stairs of my house, restlessly shuffling a pile of books in my arms like a sad little library ghost. This can go on for a good while. Rarely do I ever know exactly what book I want – or need – to read next. I MIGHT know, approximately, which six-ish books I want to read next, and even that changes per the hour and day. So imagine choosing in advance – if you even had the luxury of loved ones who could make your Amazon wish list a reality per the stringent mail requirements of our correctional system – the books you would like to have with you IN JAIL. I can barely structure my reading choices effectively around the constraints of vacation packing or the shortened library “hotlist” loan period, much less a prison sentence.
So the author spends some time exploring her thought process behind developing her incarceration reading list, and then she discusses in depth a few of the books that particularly impacted her relative to her incarceration and the alcohol addiction that preceded it. I appreciated hearing how mindfully and deliberately she read while in jail: she reads uber slowly, smells the pages, etc., both to savor the words and to relish the physical object. And of course, we can all empathize when guards are ridiculing her books or holding them hostage within view as she pines away. However, the book gradually drifted away from this area of focus as the author’s attention was increasingly drawn toward other things – such as, you know, being in jail, and being with other people who are also in jail. I was more interested in this new focus, but the shift seemed a bit sloppy and not cohesive. Like, at the beginning you have detailed exegeses of entire texts, and then that pretty much fades away. As it stands, I don’t know if there will be enough of the “books about books” factor to satisfy readers who are seeking a book of this sort, since books in this vein are not really my thing anyway.
So as the book progresses, the author still does some reading and writing, including with other inmates, but she’s also increasingly engrossed in other activities such as teaching yoga, attending life skills classes, and gardening in Dixie cups. This brings us toward the SECOND function of this book, which is to document the challenges, boredom, and the undignified, not-rehabilitative conditions of incarcerated life she observed, and to illuminate the lives of the incarcerated women she met. In particular, she makes an effort to highlight social injustices that take place within the jail setting, especially at the hands of the guards and law enforcement personnel, whom the author almost universally describes as despicably verbally/emotionally and even physically abusive. (For instance, she reports guards constantly call the inmates stupid and derisively sneer things like “See you back here soon!” when inmates are discharged.). She also endeavors to make an accounting of social justice issues that drive the disproportionate incarceration of people of color, people who have experienced poverty and violence or abuse, and people with addiction and other mental health conditions.
I respected the author’s well-intentioned effort to get to know her fellow inmates and to tell their stories. This would have easily been my favorite part of my book except for that, although the author earnestly attempts to acknowledge her own significant privilege (as a wealthy, educated white woman author/academic with a beautiful California home complete w/ meditation garden and loyal friends and husband whose handsomeness is oft-referenced), she still has some blind spots. In one scene that really stuck with me, she is immediately hateful, judgmental and aggressively, unrepentantly hostile toward another inmate who doesn’t seem to be significantly more offensive than any other inmate the author encounters but whom, like the author, is a white woman and an addict. (But presumably lacking the kind of social supports and resources the author enjoys, as we know this inmate’s children, UNLIKE the author’s, were taken by social services as a result of her addiction.) I was like, am I not supposed to see this as extreme self-loathing/projection? – because I don’t get that a meth addict somehow deserves less empathy than an ETOH addict.
Also, for someone with a meditation practice complete with home Zen garden, the author dedicates an awful lot of energy to complaining about people who smell in jail. I get it: washing is good. However, there are probably many legitimate risk factors impeding personal hygiene in jail, including safety or privacy concerns and fear; mental health concerns like sexual trauma, depression, or serious mental illness; and the cleanliness and conditions of the washing facilities themselves. (The author also seemed weirdly prudish about anything to do with vaginas in jail, as a discussion topic or as a general presence, while at the same time dedicating a lot of space to the discussion of her disgust and annoyance around this – which I found confusing.) I wished the author had been able to work a bit harder to balance out her MRSA hypochondria with some more empathy. In any case, I appreciate the author’s effort and honesty, and I know the author isn’t responsible for her limitations in telling about other people’s stories – she deserves props for making the effort – but still: Theirs were the stories I really wanted to hear. This book serves as a good reminder that there is really no replacement for "Own Voices" stories, which are incredibly important.
Where the author probably most succeeds in my view is in the THIRD function of this book as an addiction and recovery memoir. Any potential failings I’ve identified in the book’s first and second functions have merit and make sense in the context of this book as someone actively making an effort to transform a punishment into an opportunity for self-improvement. The author does not sit around waiting for rehabilitative, therapeutic services that will never be served up to her by the broken system she describes; instead, she creates her own healing and accountability program, DIY-style. She works really hard in reflecting on back on the origins, consequences, and collateral impacts of her addiction and contemplating, preparing for, and actively making change. It’s okay that she’s not perfectly maintaining just yet – she’s very upfront that she’s still changing. And she’s honest, earnest, dedicated, and importantly, remains internally motivated in that effort, which is a significantly responsible achievement for anyone coping with the oppressive, depressive conditions of incarceration. (I should also mention that I listened to the audiobook and the author does a fantastically sincere, expressive, and passionate job reading her own work, in which this quality really comes across.)
Its FIRST function was to be a "book about books and reading" kind of book. I know there are a lot of folks who love these; I'll admit they're not my fave. However, this book offered up an interesting take on the genre: You get a lot of time when you’re doing time, so within the realm of your control, on what specific reading will you spend that time?
This premise resonated with me to the extent that it was probably the reason I bought the book in the first place (in addition to the awesome trompe l'oeil cover). Nearly immediately upon completing a book, I can typically be seen wandering up and down the stairs of my house, restlessly shuffling a pile of books in my arms like a sad little library ghost. This can go on for a good while. Rarely do I ever know exactly what book I want – or need – to read next. I MIGHT know, approximately, which six-ish books I want to read next, and even that changes per the hour and day. So imagine choosing in advance – if you even had the luxury of loved ones who could make your Amazon wish list a reality per the stringent mail requirements of our correctional system – the books you would like to have with you IN JAIL. I can barely structure my reading choices effectively around the constraints of vacation packing or the shortened library “hotlist” loan period, much less a prison sentence.
So the author spends some time exploring her thought process behind developing her incarceration reading list, and then she discusses in depth a few of the books that particularly impacted her relative to her incarceration and the alcohol addiction that preceded it. I appreciated hearing how mindfully and deliberately she read while in jail: she reads uber slowly, smells the pages, etc., both to savor the words and to relish the physical object. And of course, we can all empathize when guards are ridiculing her books or holding them hostage within view as she pines away. However, the book gradually drifted away from this area of focus as the author’s attention was increasingly drawn toward other things – such as, you know, being in jail, and being with other people who are also in jail. I was more interested in this new focus, but the shift seemed a bit sloppy and not cohesive. Like, at the beginning you have detailed exegeses of entire texts, and then that pretty much fades away. As it stands, I don’t know if there will be enough of the “books about books” factor to satisfy readers who are seeking a book of this sort, since books in this vein are not really my thing anyway.
So as the book progresses, the author still does some reading and writing, including with other inmates, but she’s also increasingly engrossed in other activities such as teaching yoga, attending life skills classes, and gardening in Dixie cups. This brings us toward the SECOND function of this book, which is to document the challenges, boredom, and the undignified, not-rehabilitative conditions of incarcerated life she observed, and to illuminate the lives of the incarcerated women she met. In particular, she makes an effort to highlight social injustices that take place within the jail setting, especially at the hands of the guards and law enforcement personnel, whom the author almost universally describes as despicably verbally/emotionally and even physically abusive. (For instance, she reports guards constantly call the inmates stupid and derisively sneer things like “See you back here soon!” when inmates are discharged.). She also endeavors to make an accounting of social justice issues that drive the disproportionate incarceration of people of color, people who have experienced poverty and violence or abuse, and people with addiction and other mental health conditions.
I respected the author’s well-intentioned effort to get to know her fellow inmates and to tell their stories. This would have easily been my favorite part of my book except for that, although the author earnestly attempts to acknowledge her own significant privilege (as a wealthy, educated white woman author/academic with a beautiful California home complete w/ meditation garden and loyal friends and husband whose handsomeness is oft-referenced), she still has some blind spots. In one scene that really stuck with me, she is immediately hateful, judgmental and aggressively, unrepentantly hostile toward another inmate who doesn’t seem to be significantly more offensive than any other inmate the author encounters but whom, like the author, is a white woman and an addict. (But presumably lacking the kind of social supports and resources the author enjoys, as we know this inmate’s children, UNLIKE the author’s, were taken by social services as a result of her addiction.) I was like, am I not supposed to see this as extreme self-loathing/projection? – because I don’t get that a meth addict somehow deserves less empathy than an ETOH addict.
Also, for someone with a meditation practice complete with home Zen garden, the author dedicates an awful lot of energy to complaining about people who smell in jail. I get it: washing is good. However, there are probably many legitimate risk factors impeding personal hygiene in jail, including safety or privacy concerns and fear; mental health concerns like sexual trauma, depression, or serious mental illness; and the cleanliness and conditions of the washing facilities themselves. (The author also seemed weirdly prudish about anything to do with vaginas in jail, as a discussion topic or as a general presence, while at the same time dedicating a lot of space to the discussion of her disgust and annoyance around this – which I found confusing.) I wished the author had been able to work a bit harder to balance out her MRSA hypochondria with some more empathy. In any case, I appreciate the author’s effort and honesty, and I know the author isn’t responsible for her limitations in telling about other people’s stories – she deserves props for making the effort – but still: Theirs were the stories I really wanted to hear. This book serves as a good reminder that there is really no replacement for "Own Voices" stories, which are incredibly important.
Where the author probably most succeeds in my view is in the THIRD function of this book as an addiction and recovery memoir. Any potential failings I’ve identified in the book’s first and second functions have merit and make sense in the context of this book as someone actively making an effort to transform a punishment into an opportunity for self-improvement. The author does not sit around waiting for rehabilitative, therapeutic services that will never be served up to her by the broken system she describes; instead, she creates her own healing and accountability program, DIY-style. She works really hard in reflecting on back on the origins, consequences, and collateral impacts of her addiction and contemplating, preparing for, and actively making change. It’s okay that she’s not perfectly maintaining just yet – she’s very upfront that she’s still changing. And she’s honest, earnest, dedicated, and importantly, remains internally motivated in that effort, which is a significantly responsible achievement for anyone coping with the oppressive, depressive conditions of incarceration. (I should also mention that I listened to the audiobook and the author does a fantastically sincere, expressive, and passionate job reading her own work, in which this quality really comes across.)
mikolee's review against another edition
3.0
A far more erudite version of “Orange is the New Black”. White American woman incarcerated for dui and altercation with lapd. Her tale of survival (albeit a relatively short sentence) is dependent on her 3 books a week sent to her by her dedicated spouse. Perhaps I had a greater affinity to this author because I had read all of her book selections except the “AA Guidebook”. Her connection to the mostly WOC she was locked up with and her understanding of her place of privilege also made her more relatable.
lw10falala's review against another edition
4.0
I wanted to find a book that gave me some sort of perspective on alcoholism. It also told me what women go through while in jail and how unjust the system is. I really liked the style of the book, it was easy to understand.
cathy1665's review against another edition
2.0
She was miserable, unhappy and constipated. But after 37 days she got to return to her beautiful home and family. Class, race, wealth made her luckier than the rest.
library_lurker's review against another edition
4.0
while there are some things about this book that annoyed or upset me, i think it's an important message. i enjoyed it partially because i've spent many years mailing books to people inside and it's nice to get some perspective on how meaningful reading can be while in prison. the themes of acceptance and surrender are things i really needed to hear. the author can be frustrating and i really dislike the way she talks about other women, esp. butches. but i was able to power through that and get to the point of the narrative--and it was a good point indeed.
also STFU to the reviewers (most of whom, i'm assuming, have never seen the inside of a jail in their lives) complaining BUt sHe OnLy SeRVeD 37 dAys wHo CaReS? literally the whole POINT of this book (one of the many) is that time is different on the inside. 37 days is definitely enough to change one's perspective forever. and yes it's unfair that she got a shorter sentence than many others due to her multiple privileges, but come on! you'd take the shorter sentence too! the fault lies not with the individual but with the system here. if you don't like it, work towards abolition, or donate money to those who do.
also STFU to the reviewers (most of whom, i'm assuming, have never seen the inside of a jail in their lives) complaining BUt sHe OnLy SeRVeD 37 dAys wHo CaReS? literally the whole POINT of this book (one of the many) is that time is different on the inside. 37 days is definitely enough to change one's perspective forever. and yes it's unfair that she got a shorter sentence than many others due to her multiple privileges, but come on! you'd take the shorter sentence too! the fault lies not with the individual but with the system here. if you don't like it, work towards abolition, or donate money to those who do.
booktally's review against another edition
3.0
It's so tough rating a memoir fairly. I enjoyed the audiobook, which is narrated by the author and something I love when authors narrate their own work! Especially if the work is personal and they are able to combine their own inflections with their experiences.
With that being said, my favorite part of the audiobook was the last hour - hour and a half. So that's maybe the final less than third of the book?
It's a quick read/listen but I just felt like something was missing. Like I said, it's hard to critique a memoir.
With that being said, my favorite part of the audiobook was the last hour - hour and a half. So that's maybe the final less than third of the book?
It's a quick read/listen but I just felt like something was missing. Like I said, it's hard to critique a memoir.
rosamund's review against another edition
5.0
A beautifully written book. Set against the backdrop of a not-that-great American prison, the Leslie Schwartz captures the comfort and escape reading gives you
mikolee's review
3.0
A far more erudite version of “Orange is the New Black”. White American woman incarcerated for dui and altercation with lapd. Her tale of survival (albeit a relatively short sentence) is dependent on her 3 books a week sent to her by her dedicated spouse. Perhaps I had a greater affinity to this author because I had read all of her book selections except the “AA Guidebook”. Her connection to the mostly WOC she was locked up with and her understanding of her place of privilege also made her more relatable.