Reviews tagging 'Sexual violence'

Women Don't Owe You Pretty by Florence Given

39 reviews

amber_bookworm's review against another edition

challenging reflective medium-paced

2.75

Whilst I enjoyed parts of this book, it felt at times repetitive, and honestly at points like a load of clichés thrown together as a series of sentences. Overall I was a little disappointed reading this as it never fully engaged me in its writing style. 

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Sexism

Minor: Ableism, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Racism, and Fatphobia

pianokeys's review against another edition

dark emotional funny informative reflective sad fast-paced

4.5

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Eating disorder, Lesbophobia, Stalking, Abortion, Gaslighting, Racism, Body shaming, Bullying, Cultural appropriation, Misogyny, Sexism, Toxic relationship, Cursing, Fatphobia, Infidelity, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual harassment, Sexual violence, Toxic friendship, and Transphobia

trine_marsvin's review

emotional hopeful informative inspiring reflective fast-paced

4.5

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Content Warnings

Minor: Sexual violence, Sexual assault, Sexual harassment, Sexual content, Racism, and Rape

nara_knl's review against another edition

informative inspiring reflective fast-paced

5.0

as someone who usually only reads fiction, i didn’t expect to love this book! yet i regret not reading it earlier. i believe this book would’ve helped me heal quicker… but on the other hand it’s amazing to reflect how far i’ve come! 
i annotated the shit out of this tiny book… what can i say? HIGHLY RECOMMEND!!
if i wouldn’t have annotated so much, i would’ve lent it to every guy i know, and all the girlies out there. 
this book shouldn’t only be read by girls, this is also so relevant for guys!! wanna understand our society? your sister, mother, girlfriend, best friend, … this book is your guide!!

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Sexual harassment, Toxic relationship, Sexual violence, Rape, Eating disorder, and Sexual assault

bunchofrosies's review against another edition

informative reflective fast-paced

1.25

no. just no.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Rape, Sexism, Lesbophobia, Sexual assault, and Sexual violence

das_nomi's review against another edition

challenging funny hopeful informative inspiring fast-paced

4.25

I really liked the book. And I think I understand the hype. There wasn’t a lot of new information for me personally. But it got me thinking about some of my friendships in a new way, even though the content is more about “partner”-relationships. I feel very empowered and would like to read the chapters that were missing in this tiny version. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Body shaming, Biphobia, and Sexual harassment

Moderate: Ableism, Racism, Toxic relationship, Sexual violence, Physical abuse, Outing, Homophobia, Gaslighting, and Emotional abuse

Minor: Sexism, Rape, Sexual harassment, and Sexual assault

It’s a lighthearted approach to the problems modern women* face in our patriarchal society. With helpful “tips” to overcome our own internalised misogyny and recognise our own faults as well as setting boundaries for ourselves.

charlotteer's review

challenging emotional hopeful inspiring reflective medium-paced

5.0

Found this book very cathartic and enlightening to read, especially as I am currently focusing on being more active in my healing process. Some of the information was repetitive and wasn't new but I believe it was important to be mentioned and drilled in. 

This book allowed me to see certain things in a new light and has lit a fire for me to do better for myself and others. It has held me accountable for my lack of boundaries (people-pleasing), privilege and made me realise the negative behaviours I had (especially when it came to apologies). 

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Content Warnings

Minor: Ableism, Homophobia, Racism, Sexual violence, and Transphobia

Florence Given does give trigger warnings on the chapters that include references to sexual assault.

ronjagry's review against another edition

funny lighthearted fast-paced

2.75

Great for teens, but if you're an old feminist like myself the info is a bit too basic. Would 100% give as a gift to a niece or daughter though!

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Sexism, Misogyny, and Racism

Minor: Sexual violence and Sexual harassment

james1star's review against another edition

informative medium-paced

4.0

On the whole I did ‘enjoy’ (not the most apt word but it’s what I’m going with) this book and would recommend it. What I liked most was how Given makes sure to address her privilege as an ‘average size’ cisgender white British woman within the discourse of feminism/feminist theory and acknowledges this fact and how marginalised groups (trans/non binary women, fat women, women of colour) are unfairly treated and held to a higher standard by both women and men. As many reviewers have said, a lot of what is actually said isn’t really all that groundbreaking but I would argue it’s been personalised to Given’s life at the appropriate points, it’s succinct, well written and accessible. I did only read the small edition so I’m guessing I missed out on parts too. Below are some notes I made on each chapter so if you’re interested in them check out the book for more information. I’d say it was a solid 4 star read. 

1. Challenging what we’ve learned and the society we’ve grown up in is hard and uncomfortable but needed for change to occur and the little discomfort is a lot less compared to the injustices, be patient but also call out when appropriate 
2. Being or making yourself more ‘pretty’ doesn’t make you any less of a feminist because society still values beauty in women highly, different standards for different women e.g. trans, fat, people of colour where additional prejudices are present, acknowledge privileges
3. Love yourself, no one really cares about what you’re doing/how you look, why settle when there’s something/one better 
4. Internalised misogyny prevents progress, ‘flaws’ are MAN-made, beauty standards are fake, healing own insecurities will lead to empathy and viewing other women differently/in a more positive light 
5. Queer feelings are valid, working though internalised homo/lesbo/bi-phobia, limited and stereotypical views of queerness prevented her from validating feelings, oversaturated heteronormativity in media (it’s ‘hetrifying’), queer women view others via a queer gaze not the typical heterosexual male gaze 
6. Women can and should enjoy sex too (if they want), reinforces notion they’re passive participants reserved for men’s desires, normalised discomfort forces queer women to repress their feelings 
7. Asking for consent > sexual assault, shows maturity and it’s the law, providing the option of not doing anything, need to learn this before sexual violence takes place, set and keep boundaries 
8. Can’t teach how to avoid sexual assault because it’s never your fault, rape culture, ‘preventative’ measures women take when that’s not the problem, it’s physically impossibly to “ask” for rape, openly discuss sexual violence from a young age to avoid it becoming normalised/accepted, rape’s the only crime where the victim is treated/questioned like the perpetrator, inconsistencies with reporting and sentencing
9. The price women pay for existing (so many adjustments, additional expenses, etc), spend money/energy keeping safe from men but paid less, standards are set by the hetero male gaze, ‘flaws’ generated by capitalist standards of beauty, still not that safe being visibly queer, women are meant to be sexy but when she uses this ‘power’ that’s a bad thing, how shame is used to put women down, sexual gaze thrusted on woman’s bodies (school uniform, nipples, etc) 
10. It’s okay and ‘normal’ to feel heartbroken, hard to quit people completely in our social media world, how to recover, craving romance doesn’t make you any less of a feminist 

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Sexism, Sexual assault, Misogyny, and Sexual violence

Minor: Biphobia, Rape, Lesbophobia, Transphobia, Homophobia, Racism, Fatphobia, Sexual content, and Eating disorder

readsbyhope's review

challenging emotional reflective slow-paced

2.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Toxic relationship, Toxic friendship, and Sexism

Moderate: Sexual harassment, Sexual violence, and Sexual assault