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beaufig's review against another edition
I read the first quarter of this book, and skimmed the rest. It's a very insightful book. My primary takeaway is to not run pointless meetings, and to know the purpose of a gathering or conversation. When I establish, I should coordinate and be clear. When I attend, I can ask and try to understand.
djmolls's review against another edition
5.0
For anyone who loves hosting like myself, this book is fantastic to think about how to create purposeful and mindful experiences for your guests in any occasion! 4.5/5
geenybell's review against another edition
3.0
Excellent ideas throughout- however the structure and repetitiveness of it, lost impact.
Too many examples from too many very different contexts- perhaps grouping types of events together more would have helped- I can see that Priya wanted to showcase her ideas and principles as being appropriate and effective for hugely diverse types of gatherings, but in doing so it kind of lost impact and clarity.
I will certainly reference this book- and was encouraged to hear many of own ideas and practices in it- but the book felt lacking and unorganised.
Too many examples from too many very different contexts- perhaps grouping types of events together more would have helped- I can see that Priya wanted to showcase her ideas and principles as being appropriate and effective for hugely diverse types of gatherings, but in doing so it kind of lost impact and clarity.
I will certainly reference this book- and was encouraged to hear many of own ideas and practices in it- but the book felt lacking and unorganised.
haileyrobertson's review against another edition
informative
reflective
medium-paced
3.0
not particularly informative but it inspired me to reflect on the purpose of gathering which was helpful to get ideas flowing
lydiacarma's review against another edition
informative
reflective
slow-paced
3.0
Lots of good things to think about. The audio voice was annoying and hard to get through…
elly29's review against another edition
informative
inspiring
medium-paced
4.5
This book came to me at the right point in my life, as I look forward to being a kin-keeper and connector for my family (and hopefully, friend groups, too). It makes me think about being intentional about my gatherings, about inviting the right people for the gathering (and recognizing that thoughtful exclusion can be a way to protect the gathering), and that a gathering really begins the moment your guests know about the gathering. I think that was something I intuited, but it’s nice to have it spelled-out in such a fashion.
I’m also reminded that the opening and the closing are so incredibly important. The opening, closing, and climax are mostly what people remember (and should be used as an avenue for connection or to refer back to the gathering’s purpose, and logistics and acknowledgments should be left out of it). Gatherings are meant to be ephemeral, unique, once-in-a-lifetime. It reminds me of a conversation I had with a friend where we talked about how trying to recapture an experience in the same way makes a pale imitation, and diminishes that initial experience because the subsequent experience, the repeat, cannot top the memory of the first experience.
Gatherings can have separate rules from normal life, and as long as guests’ expectations are calibrated beforehand, guests are usually willing to play along (eg, no cellphones, or no discussing one’s profession, or everyone has to tell a story and the last person to go has to sing theirs), to separate the gathering from the rest of life. To help that, ushering is a useful tool for entering into the gathering, and also exiting. Ushering can be as simple as saying “welcome” and introducing your dinner party invitees to one another, or it can be as complicated as a 30min decompression period before entering a sensory play.
I liked a lot of the stories that illustrated her points, from the “Dîner en Blanc”, to the theater director’s bachelor party where he was left clues months in advance, and another host who asked for two favorite photos from the year and decorated his Christmas tree with them hours before he hosted Christmas Eve dinner for those friends (bc he just got into town that day), to the stories around 15 Toasts and what makes those events successful.
Whatever type of the gathering, though, theater folks have a knack for understanding the concept of ushering, opening, and closing. (As well as novelists — gotta have great opening lines, and good ending ones — and fancy hotel experience designers — gotta make sure your guests feel welcome and awed and yet not “at-home”.)
I ended up buying the audiobook (or else I risked a 16 week wait to listen to the last 2hrs of a 9hr book), and I am pleased with the purchase. I am sure I will consult it again in the future.
awainwright's review against another edition
emotional
funny
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
4.0
baschoon's review against another edition
informative
inspiring
reflective
fast-paced
5.0
One of my favorite books I've read, and one of the books I most recommend to others. This book has made a tremendous impact on my life and how I approach making spaces, both at home and in my career.