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3.53 AVERAGE
3.53 AVERAGE
informative
reflective
medium-paced
I liked the idea of this book and am generally receptive to self help and improvement books. Got about halfway through and determined that we eschew enough cards in the deck or they just don’t apply to our situation so it’s not really a fit. It was reassuring to realize how well divided our responsibilities are and I’ll keep our method of teamwork over putting something fully on one person.
I was surprised it didn’t include more inclusive language and that there are so many women out there that don’t have a partner, but another child.
I was surprised it didn’t include more inclusive language and that there are so many women out there that don’t have a partner, but another child.
3.5 rounded up. I had to round up for any book about a more equitable division of labor for households with kids. It is so important and so overlooked in feminism overall. However, I felt she should have had more research and less anecdotal evidence (although that made it easier to read and less text-booky, and I have read the research before, but still). She doesn't account for time making money as one of the tasks, which should hold some weight for one or both partners. Also, can't kids do this to help too? She offers a lot of excellent takeaways and I find myself now talking to my husband about which cards I'm owning and there's truth to visibility. Perhaps one day we will sit and go through the cards, but we also aren't in dire need. There is so much here in understanding that women's time is equal to men's and we don't want to do all the mundane shit. So points to the author for spreading this message and being everywhere lately. I hope she's helped many women gain back some time and semblance of themselves.
Another read in advance of baby coming! I think presented some really interesting ideas. I definitely will take kernels of this into my own home life. Wish the book wasn't so "fluffed up" and although I agreed with lots of the ideas, sometimes the sentiments veered towards very... bitter(?) - will say overall though I think the high-level bullet points of this book were great!
This book could have been 15 pages long. It's too long for what it contains
informative
reflective
medium-paced
Great way to unpack a system for more equitable partnership. I like her straightforward writing style, the extent of her research, and the balance of the perspectives. I’ve already recommended it to several friends.
I couldn't finish the book. I heard about this book and added it to my list to read to ensure I wasn't one of the males she talked about and because I've had some times thinking I'm the spouse doing nearly everything (all outside stuff, most kids things, etc. largely due to my spouses work schedule, ADHD diagnosis and depression) and looking for ideas to help us and me. This book did so much husband blaming and used so many absolutes I could only get maybe 1/4 way in at most. There was one sentence I remember saying this may not be all men then switched right back to all men do this, all husbands do that. If it can help you, great, but I couldn't stand the writing style to know if it even has helpful tips.
informative
medium-paced
I saw this book recommended a fair bit online in a marriage preparation context, and while I found it interesting in an academic sense, it didn’t provide a lot for me to take into my life. Although Rodsky insists her method is for everyone, the focus is heavily on middle-class American women in relationships with men, and a lot of the problems she outlines as common among her friends are things I can’t imagine ever coming up in my social circles. For example, why are children not expected to take on any household tasks in this model, and why is astrology being mentioned even in passing?
The key principle of this book can be boiled down to - attempting to split household tasks 50/50 is a recipe for failure, and you’re better off each having specific tasks that you take 100% ownership of. That’s sound advice and I do think the Fair Play website - which basically just says this, and lists tasks that might need claiming - is useful in highlighting hidden labour and helping lay everything needed for a successful home life out. In trying to make a full-length book, though, the process is needlessly complicated and twee-d up. Do we really, as adults, need to refer to taking time for our own interests as Unicorn Space??? To say nothing of the terrible “being the SHE-E-O” of your home.
I’d recommend the website and the general concepts at the centre of Fair Play, but as a book, this got very mired in fluff very quickly.
The key principle of this book can be boiled down to - attempting to split household tasks 50/50 is a recipe for failure, and you’re better off each having specific tasks that you take 100% ownership of. That’s sound advice and I do think the Fair Play website - which basically just says this, and lists tasks that might need claiming - is useful in highlighting hidden labour and helping lay everything needed for a successful home life out. In trying to make a full-length book, though, the process is needlessly complicated and twee-d up. Do we really, as adults, need to refer to taking time for our own interests as Unicorn Space??? To say nothing of the terrible “being the SHE-E-O” of your home.
I’d recommend the website and the general concepts at the centre of Fair Play, but as a book, this got very mired in fluff very quickly.
Content Warnings
Moderate: Misogyny
Minor: Infidelity, Injury/Injury detail
informative
inspiring
reflective
fast-paced
Everyone in a relationship/with kids should read this. I bought it which should tell you something