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mxsallybend's review
3.0
Like most short story collections in the Bizarro genre, Tall Tales with Short Cocks Vol. 2 is uneven, but always original. There are tales that are bizarrely told, which are generally my least favourite, and those that are more traditionally told, but about bizarre things, which is where I find the appeal.
The 'hits' for me in this collection included:
The Ballad of Billy the Squid by Eirik Gumeny merges two individually bizarre ideas - a boy with a squid for a head & the fetish oddity of tentacle porn - and fashions them into a story that's more complex and entertaining than you might expect.
A Hand Walks Into a Bar by John McNee is a darkly humorous tale of the macabre that reminded me of Clive Barker's The Body Politic in that not only manages to make a character of a dismembered hand, but actually makes it interesting.
Princess Di’s Mercedes and the Dead Man’s ASL Chimp by Jon Konrath is a story that never manages to be quite as controversial or in-your-face offensive as the title would suggest, but which thoroughly entertains with its truly inventive technological and sociological twists.
The Apple of My iPhone by Danger Slater is one of my favourites in the collection, a story of technological obsession and integration that's certainly been told before, but never quite like this, and never with quite such a satisfying twist ending.
Walkin’ After Midnight by Donald Armfield is a strangely inventive, almost surreally entertaining, tale of well-timed pop culture references, psudeo-mythological dreams, and the oddest hit-list in hired killer history.
Clear Skies Today, God Willing by Christy Leigh Stewart is an extremely short, satirical take on religion and instant-gratification that amused me to no end.
365 Yesterdays by Wol-vriey is one of the strangest end-of-the-world tales I've ever read, but completely entertaining in its cruel ingenuity regarding alien motives and human wish-fulfillment.
Bread Alone by David Raffin is a twisted tale of just how far (and how easily) isolation can drive one to madness, especially when surrounded by penguins!
Laser Tits by Justin Grimbol is almost as awesome as the title suggests, a story of personification, obsession, and sexual excesses that tries a bit too hard, but which manages to embed the surreal so deeply within the tale that it almost seems normal.
If you're a fan of the Bizarro genre, then there is plenty here to enjoy, much of it from authors you've likely sampled before. If you're new to the genre, then this is a great place to start, offering up small samples of the quirks and oddities found within it, at least one of which is certain to catch your interest.
Originally reviewed at Beauty in Ruins
The 'hits' for me in this collection included:
The Ballad of Billy the Squid by Eirik Gumeny merges two individually bizarre ideas - a boy with a squid for a head & the fetish oddity of tentacle porn - and fashions them into a story that's more complex and entertaining than you might expect.
A Hand Walks Into a Bar by John McNee is a darkly humorous tale of the macabre that reminded me of Clive Barker's The Body Politic in that not only manages to make a character of a dismembered hand, but actually makes it interesting.
Princess Di’s Mercedes and the Dead Man’s ASL Chimp by Jon Konrath is a story that never manages to be quite as controversial or in-your-face offensive as the title would suggest, but which thoroughly entertains with its truly inventive technological and sociological twists.
The Apple of My iPhone by Danger Slater is one of my favourites in the collection, a story of technological obsession and integration that's certainly been told before, but never quite like this, and never with quite such a satisfying twist ending.
Walkin’ After Midnight by Donald Armfield is a strangely inventive, almost surreally entertaining, tale of well-timed pop culture references, psudeo-mythological dreams, and the oddest hit-list in hired killer history.
Clear Skies Today, God Willing by Christy Leigh Stewart is an extremely short, satirical take on religion and instant-gratification that amused me to no end.
365 Yesterdays by Wol-vriey is one of the strangest end-of-the-world tales I've ever read, but completely entertaining in its cruel ingenuity regarding alien motives and human wish-fulfillment.
Bread Alone by David Raffin is a twisted tale of just how far (and how easily) isolation can drive one to madness, especially when surrounded by penguins!
Laser Tits by Justin Grimbol is almost as awesome as the title suggests, a story of personification, obsession, and sexual excesses that tries a bit too hard, but which manages to embed the surreal so deeply within the tale that it almost seems normal.
If you're a fan of the Bizarro genre, then there is plenty here to enjoy, much of it from authors you've likely sampled before. If you're new to the genre, then this is a great place to start, offering up small samples of the quirks and oddities found within it, at least one of which is certain to catch your interest.
Originally reviewed at Beauty in Ruins
daviddavidkatzman's review
4.0
Bizarro. What is it? Where is it? When is it and whycuz it? Who did what now and to whom? And most importantly, where is my bean sprout sandwich? Did I eat it? Will it return to haunt me in the near future?
I will attempt to answer none of these questions in this review. In fact, this review is currently out of order.
pkuhdflkjasfkjs
Some stuff about this book. It has 15 short stories in it. They are quick to read! Speedy! Fast is an important quality in the book realm. No one likes a book that overstays its welcome like your cousin Tambo or herpes.
There are some words in this book, which is good, good. Well done.
My foot! Ouch!
Do you like light beach reads? Do you like light beach reads about octopus-human sex and zombie-maggot sex? Then this is likely a book for you and the octopus-maggot-zombie who loves you. Mostly I thought this book was charming. Like you, in your bloomers. With zombie-maggot-octopoop up your butt. And the horse you rode in on just a little too vigorously for my taste.
Where was I? And where am I? I do not recognize this gelatinous sculpture of L. Ron Hubbard.
Do not read this expecting elaborate grammar trickery and proper punk; chew; a shun. Do not come here for high literature. Come here high for cliterature.
I have said too much. Did I give away the ending? Spoiler alert. This book has spoiled and should be sealed, hermetically, in a hermeneutic bag. In Herman's new tick ball bag. That would be, I think, the ball bag of a tick that Herman had recently purchased. Or adopted, perhaps, if he wasn't so speciesist.
1 star for the average consumer. 2 stars for the above-average consumer. 3 stars for the gender neutral consumer. 3 1/2 stars for bizarro fans. 4 stars for fuck you, get a job. 5 stars for the authors published here and their pets.
I will attempt to answer none of these questions in this review. In fact, this review is currently out of order.
Some stuff about this book. It has 15 short stories in it. They are quick to read! Speedy! Fast is an important quality in the book realm. No one likes a book that overstays its welcome like your cousin Tambo or herpes.
There are some words in this book, which is good, good. Well done.
My foot! Ouch!
Do you like light beach reads? Do you like light beach reads about octopus-human sex and zombie-maggot sex? Then this is likely a book for you and the octopus-maggot-zombie who loves you. Mostly I thought this book was charming. Like you, in your bloomers. With zombie-maggot-octopoop up your butt. And the horse you rode in on just a little too vigorously for my taste.
Where was I? And where am I? I do not recognize this gelatinous sculpture of L. Ron Hubbard.
Do not read this expecting elaborate grammar trickery and proper punk; chew; a shun. Do not come here for high literature. Come here high for cliterature.
I have said too much. Did I give away the ending? Spoiler alert. This book has spoiled and should be sealed, hermetically, in a hermeneutic bag. In Herman's new tick ball bag. That would be, I think, the ball bag of a tick that Herman had recently purchased. Or adopted, perhaps, if he wasn't so speciesist.
1 star for the average consumer. 2 stars for the above-average consumer. 3 stars for the gender neutral consumer. 3 1/2 stars for bizarro fans. 4 stars for fuck you, get a job. 5 stars for the authors published here and their pets.
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