Scan barcode
casira's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.75
Graphic: Child abuse, Domestic abuse, Mental illness, Toxic relationship, Panic attacks/disorders, Physical abuse, Death of parent, and Emotional abuse
Moderate: Colonisation, Infidelity, Suicidal thoughts, and Cursing
fkshg8465's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Graphic: Abandonment, Death of parent, Misogyny, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Gaslighting, Physical abuse, Xenophobia, Infidelity, Religious bigotry, and Racism
readingwithgoose's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
5.0
Graphic: Physical abuse, Child abuse, Emotional abuse, and Mental illness
Moderate: Gaslighting, Infidelity, Suicidal thoughts, and Death of parent
Minor: Racism
ukponge's review
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? No
4.0
Graphic: Infidelity, Religious bigotry, Mental illness, Domestic abuse, Xenophobia, and War
queenkath32's review
- Strong character development? Yes
5.0
Graphic: Death of parent, Sexism, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Racism, Toxic relationship, Misogyny, Infidelity, Domestic abuse, Colonisation, Grief, Physical abuse, Suicidal thoughts, and Xenophobia
amandafitz's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? No
4.0
Graphic: Panic attacks/disorders, Misogyny, Religious bigotry, Gaslighting, Suicidal thoughts, Violence, Death of parent, Sexism, Emotional abuse, Infidelity, and Toxic relationship
bookedbymadeline's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
Graphic: Emotional abuse, Misogyny, Mental illness, Domestic abuse, and Colonisation
Moderate: Death of parent, Racism, Islamophobia, and Grief
Minor: Infidelity and Suicidal thoughts
drraytay's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Graphic: Gaslighting, Suicidal thoughts, Misogyny, Mental illness, Toxic relationship, Grief, Emotional abuse, and Domestic abuse
Moderate: Violence, Colonisation, War, Physical abuse, Suicidal thoughts, Infidelity, and Death of parent
bookishmillennial's review
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Yara is a Palestinian American woman who grew up in Brooklyn, New York, whose parents were immigrants from Palestine, and who is now living in a small city with her husband & two young kids. This novel takes place over about a year in Yara’s life after a great loss, as she navigates depression amidst her occupational and interpersonal struggles as a mom and wife. There are excerpts from Yara’s journal in which she writes letters to her mom, mostly about memories from her childhood, scattered throughout the book, and each gives readers a bit more insight as to how volatile Yara’s childhood had been. Yara struggles to connect with her husband Fadi, and to be present for her daughters Mira and Jude. All the while, she questions herself and why she feels so depleted and empty of fulfillment, when she logically recognizes she has so much more than her parents did at her age. After she calls a colleague racist at work, Yara is strongly encouraged to begin counseling sessions with William, their staff therapist. Through this and through Yara’s own inner examinations, she begins exploring the roots of her pain, anger, and sadness.
Wow wow wow wow I am blown away. This is one of my favorite literary fiction novels EVER. Etaf Rum’s writing of Yara’s journey felt like a deep, quite, aching rumble 😭❤️🩹. This is a character-driven novel and Yara is such a dynamic, authentically human character! Rum fleshed out Yara’s behaviors, thoughts, fears, and motivations so incredibly well. Though I did not have the childhood that Yara had, I felt myself strongly relating to her, and infuriated for her! The way that Rum repeatedly gave us scenes where Yara attempted to mend a broken bridge, or extended an olive branch to her husband Fadi, was masterfully done. Yara desperately tries to ask for what she needs from Fadi, regarding time spent together, travel, emotional support and validation, reflection and examination of their lives and pasts, and something beyond watching tv together every night for an hour or two. It’s so disheartening to see Yara shut down every single time💔
Rum presents every single insidious comeback that people respond with when they gaslight or emotionally manipulate the person who is trying so desperately to be heard, seen, understood, or validated. I wanted to scream, “you’re not hearing her! listen to her! her feelings are valid! stop centering yourself!” but it was no use. I also appreciated that Rum presents a journey away from reconciliation. Sometimes, certain people simply cannot be the partner/friend/etc. you want them to be.
Yara’s relationship with her mother was quite devastating. There is nothing novel about fraught mother-daughter dynamics, but add in the layer of guilt Yara feels about her mother’s upbringing and abusive marriage, and you get a fully stacked complex PTSD sandwich. Yara fully recognizes that her mother would have probably felt grateful for the life Yara leads. It drives her even deeper into the spiral of feeling unworthy and unlovable. However, the way her perception of her mother adjusts over time because of her own personal journey was stunning; the level of empathy, tenderness, and sorrow she held for her mother was staggering and humbling. To find forgiveness is such a gift sometimes.
On the other hand, Yara’s dad was the perfect example of yet another person so stuck in their ways and centering themselves that their refusal to take any accountability only deepened the cuts that were already there. I fully believe you do not owe everyone all of you, and you do not owe everyone forgiveness. Some people need to earn their way back into your life and the way to pave this road is by changed behavior (and a bit of remorse goes a LONG way!).
I am so proud of Yara. She learns to listen to her gut, recognize how her body is feeling around certain people or when she is doing certain things, she makes a friend, she begins to open herself up and become a bit vulnerable, which is so scary! However, by doing this, she also expands her once-isolated world & truly begins to make decisions that she feels good about. So many people recognize that they are simply on autopilot & that their actions have been driven by people-pleasing, guilt, & shame. Not everyone does something about it; it’s no easy feat. Gosh, I loved this book & I’m so moved by Yara’s journey.
please see content warnings below & take care while reading 🫶🏽
Graphic: Death of parent, Misogyny, Suicidal thoughts, Cursing, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Gaslighting, Grief, Racism, and Sexism
Minor: Infidelity, Genocide, and War
torturedreadersdept's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Graphic: Abandonment, Bullying, Death, Child abuse, Gaslighting, Dysphoria, Emotional abuse, Racism, Cursing, Misogyny, War, Domestic abuse, Infidelity, Islamophobia, Mental illness, Suicidal thoughts, Grief, Toxic relationship, Sexism, Death of parent, and Physical abuse
Minor: Islamophobia