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kenreid's review against another edition
2.0
I got through this book slowly over a few weeks as a sort of "I'm waiting on my tea to boil" kind of read. At the time of publishing (1980) this book referred to current science and concepts, and cultural norms, which aren't particularly relevant to the world of today. Additionally, I think this book really just explains what is innately known to many of us instinctively (e.g. the Satir modes). While useful to those who may not consciously understand the instinctive cues (such as responding in a computer Satir mode to someone throwing verbal-punches), I think most people wouldn't learn much from reading this.
sbaunsgard's review against another edition
4.0
Good book but I think it would be better with in person practice and training. The cues are probably too overt to be super recognizable in person without thinking about it. However the techniques are valid, when you recognize the prompts.
zoes_human's review against another edition
I can see where this book would be quite useful if you have a passive-aggressive person in your life that you want to remain on good terms with for some reason (work, family, whatever).
However, I loathe that sort of behavior and have numerous things better to do with my time than coddle someone who is attempting to manipulate me emotionally. I'm just not interested in keeping those people in my life nor do I face any circumstances that require me to do so.
Seriously, if you come at me with "If you loved me, then you would...", the response you'll get is "Huh. Guess I don't love you then."
However, I loathe that sort of behavior and have numerous things better to do with my time than coddle someone who is attempting to manipulate me emotionally. I'm just not interested in keeping those people in my life nor do I face any circumstances that require me to do so.
Seriously, if you come at me with "If you loved me, then you would...", the response you'll get is "Huh. Guess I don't love you then."
ejdecoster's review against another edition
Presupposed a lot of knowledge; you really had to buy into a system to really understand most of the book. Not only was the content dated, I was pretty frustrated by the distinctions that relied exclusively on gender differences as explanations.
libbet's review against another edition
4.0
Truly fascinating. I really should have read this while I was still at my old job. Now planning on looking up as much of her non-fiction as possible.
jen1110's review
3.0
It doesn't contain as many tricks/strategies for avoiding/defusing verbal abuse as I was hoping for, but it's still a pretty good book. Most of the material deals with conversation and communication and how to make sure that your message is understood. I'm glad I read it, but I don't know how useful it will be in the long run.
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