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crackedspines_'s review against another edition
challenging
emotional
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
OVERALL: I adore this book. It’s one of the best books I’ve read. The complex, thoughtful exploration of grief + loneliness was beautiful. I cried multiple times while reading and used a ridiculous amount of tabs.
STRUCTURE: I really liked the dual, sorta-non-linear timeline. It made a lot of sense for this story.
THEME: This book explored a lot of complicated, emotional themes. It was a very authentic representation of grief, loneliness, and family.
WRITING: Mason Deaver’s writing was striking. They put so many elusive feelings into words so perfectly.
CHARACTERS: The characters were dimensional and unique and real - Marcus and Ethan both had many layers, as did Vanessa and Joel, but in a very different way. The characters had full, satisfying arcs and all felt like their own individual people. I especially enjoyed the raw, honest portrayal of Liam’s grief. He was not always a likable character in the most strict sense; he fucked up sometimes. But I liked them more for it. It felt REAL, to show them reacting that way to the loss of their brother.
STRUCTURE: I really liked the dual, sorta-non-linear timeline. It made a lot of sense for this story.
THEME: This book explored a lot of complicated, emotional themes. It was a very authentic representation of grief, loneliness, and family.
WRITING: Mason Deaver’s writing was striking. They put so many elusive feelings into words so perfectly.
CHARACTERS: The characters were dimensional and unique and real - Marcus and Ethan both had many layers, as did Vanessa and Joel, but in a very different way. The characters had full, satisfying arcs and all felt like their own individual people. I especially enjoyed the raw, honest portrayal of Liam’s grief. He was not always a likable character in the most strict sense; he fucked up sometimes. But I liked them more for it. It felt REAL, to show them reacting that way to the loss of their brother.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Cursing, Death, Grief, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, and Self harm
Moderate: Suicidal thoughts and Toxic relationship
misgenderingmrdcoolblue's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
reflective
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.75
I was ugly crying several times throughout reading this. This in-depth look at Liam's grief and how it both affects and reveals the cracks in their relationships will absolutely kick you in the feels.
Content Warnings
Moderate: Self harm and Suicidal thoughts
Minor: Panic attacks/disorders
melaniereadsbooks's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
sad
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
Thank you to Hear Our Voices Tours and PUSH for an arc of this book.
In the wake of their brother's death, Liam has to contend with his grief, tensions between them and their parents, and faltering friendships. Told through multiple points and time before and after Ethan's death, this is a story of grief and reconciliation and understanding more about others and yourself.
Firstly, I'd like to say that Mason Deaver has done it again and their writing is still absolutely phenomenal. It's heart-wrenching, deep, and provides so much food for thought. I really enjoyed reading about Liam's journey and how they reconciled with what happened to his brother. I think this story has so much going for it and communicates feelings of grief that are often glanced over in books. It really gave me a lot of feelings.
There were two things about this book that kept me from giving it a full 5 star rating. The first one was something that I'm not sure will be in the finished version or not. Liam is nonbinary and uses they/them and he/him pronouns. They expressed that he doesn't like to be called "son," "guy/dude/man/boy/etc". To me, someone with those preferences typically also wouldn't like the word "brother" for themselves, and would prefer "sibling" or something else. Now, obviously if the character is okay with "brother," then that is totally valid. My thought process here is that it is actually not obvious if Liam is okay with this or not, as there are other times in the book when someone calls him a name they are not okay with, and he decides to let it go. This makes me wonder if the times Liam was referred to as brother were a mistake? Or if maybe it just needed to be explicitly stated that he wasn't okay with those other terms, but was okay with this one.
The other thing I took issue with was more of a personal note: there is a very graphic and detailed scene of self-harm in this book. Personally, I didn't think that scene was necessary to the plot or the story, or even fit well with Liam's character up to that point. I honestly wish this chapter hadn't been included, or at least that I had known ahead of time and skipped it myself. After I had finished reading, I looked on the author's website and saw that they do mention it as a content warning for this book. I wish it had been written at the beginning of the book along with other content warnings, as I feel many readers are not in the practice of checking websites before reading a book.
All in all, I really did enjoy this book, although I think the personally triggering content for me will keep me from reading it again. Please be aware of the content warnings before picking this up, and stay safe!
Pub date: June 1, 2021
In the wake of their brother's death, Liam has to contend with his grief, tensions between them and their parents, and faltering friendships. Told through multiple points and time before and after Ethan's death, this is a story of grief and reconciliation and understanding more about others and yourself.
Firstly, I'd like to say that Mason Deaver has done it again and their writing is still absolutely phenomenal. It's heart-wrenching, deep, and provides so much food for thought. I really enjoyed reading about Liam's journey and how they reconciled with what happened to his brother. I think this story has so much going for it and communicates feelings of grief that are often glanced over in books. It really gave me a lot of feelings.
There were two things about this book that kept me from giving it a full 5 star rating. The first one was something that I'm not sure will be in the finished version or not. Liam is nonbinary and uses they/them and he/him pronouns. They expressed that he doesn't like to be called "son," "guy/dude/man/boy/etc". To me, someone with those preferences typically also wouldn't like the word "brother" for themselves, and would prefer "sibling" or something else. Now, obviously if the character is okay with "brother," then that is totally valid. My thought process here is that it is actually not obvious if Liam is okay with this or not, as there are other times in the book when someone calls him a name they are not okay with, and he decides to let it go. This makes me wonder if the times Liam was referred to as brother were a mistake? Or if maybe it just needed to be explicitly stated that he wasn't okay with those other terms, but was okay with this one.
The other thing I took issue with was more of a personal note: there is a very graphic and detailed scene of self-harm in this book. Personally, I didn't think that scene was necessary to the plot or the story, or even fit well with Liam's character up to that point. I honestly wish this chapter hadn't been included, or at least that I had known ahead of time and skipped it myself. After I had finished reading, I looked on the author's website and saw that they do mention it as a content warning for this book. I wish it had been written at the beginning of the book along with other content warnings, as I feel many readers are not in the practice of checking websites before reading a book.
All in all, I really did enjoy this book, although I think the personally triggering content for me will keep me from reading it again. Please be aware of the content warnings before picking this up, and stay safe!
Pub date: June 1, 2021
Content Warnings
Graphic: Blood, Car accident, Child death, Death, Gore, Grief, Panic attacks/disorders, Self harm, and Suicidal thoughts
misgenderingperpetualpages's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
reflective
sad
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
CWs: child/sibling death; grief; references to deadly car accident; PTSD, depression, anxiety, and panic attacks; brief mention of vomit; self harm and suicide ideation; some instances of misgendering
Mason Deaver has truly outdone themself in this nuanced exploration about how grief defines and changes us.
While The Ghosts We Keep is certainly a heavy, harrowing, and possibly triggering story for some readers, I think it's also very much a necessary story that puts the reader on a path towards catharsis. So often in fiction—and in life—death can be romanticized as it gets processed, and that's especially true for the dead, who we are often told to remember "kindly." But grief and loss is so much more complicated than that, and this is a book that intimately understands the ups and downs of that process.
I love this story explores different degrees of grief. Not every single person has the same kind of relationship with the deceased, by definition. Some are parents, some are siblings, some are friends, some are lovers, and some are merely acquaintances. This is a story that shows how different people grieve in their own ways, all of which are appropriate and valid according to the unique relationship they had with the person who passed away. No single relationship can truly capture the fullness of one life, and therefore no two people's grief will look exactly the same. And that doesn't mean one way of grieving is "less" than the other, just that they're different.
Liam is realizing that they're at a very different point with their grief as compared to their parents, their family, and their classmates. While his parents might be ready to start sorting through Ethan's belongings, for example, Liam may not be at that point yet, and he has to learn that that's okay.
The story also explores how people outside of the immediate family relate to death and loss. If someone's only experience with loss is through a distant family member or a friend of the family, then that's a very different experience than losing a sibling or a son, and thus makes it almost impossible to "relate" to Liam's experience. Again, that doesn't mean what those other people experienced wasn't "real," but merely that it's a different type of loss that doesn't always neatly project onto the way someone else is grieving. This loss is something that Liam has work through themself at their own pace, even when they can't understand their own feelings or end up lashing out at other people. Grief is not this nice, convenient, neat, one-size-fits-all experience, and this story really gives Liam the space to go through it, for better or worse.
I also love how this story centers a non-binary character without necessarily being about non-binaryness at all, but also intimately understanding how Liam's non-binary identity is tied up in his grief.
When someone close to us dies young, there can be a tendency to venerate the dead and compare yourself to them, wondering if you "deserve" to live when they didn't get that chance. Liam is not only grieving the loss of their brother, but feeling burdened by being their parents' "last shot" at having a "normal," successful kid. That feeling is compounded by his queerness, because he's always thought of Ethan as "the normal one," "The Golden Boy," and his parents' shot at having some semblance of a "family legacy." He's very aware of how his future looks different than anything his parents would've imagined for Ethan, and how he can't give his parents the same things Ethan could have, just because of who he is and what he wants for himself.
This leaves them feeling a lot of shame and anxiety, simply because there is no defined, clear-cut path towards queer futures, and in fact queer futures are sometimes beyond our imagination simply because they've been erased from public consciousness. So Liam finds themself wondering how they can possibly fill the void that Ethan's left behind in their family, and if they're even meant to try in the first place.
I also appreciate how honestly this story tackles toxic friendships and friendship break-ups, which we don't see often enough in YA. Liam's best friends, Vanessa and Joel, are not only seeing less of Liam now that they're dating each other, but they find Liam's grief to be "a downer" and "an inconvenience" simply because Liam isn't ready to open up about it. So not only is Liam left dealing with anger, confusion, and heartbreak all at once, but they're also struggling to navigate how people expect them to perform grief. He's cycling through all these emotions, which can sometimes be destructive, and that only gets compounded by friends who are mishandling his processing of grief. Sometimes the people closest to us aren't the right people to help us through difficult things, and sometimes those relationships exacerbate toxic behavior and situations, even if all parties are trying to come from a "good place"—and it's important to know when to walk away from relationships that aren't serving us.
But as much as this story deals with loss—losing a brother, losing connection to other people, losing friends—it's still ultimately about what Liam gains. Through all of this, Liam gains a new friendship with Ethan's best friend, Marcus. They gain a new understanding of their brother as they go through his things and hear from the people who were closest to him. They gain confidence in their right to process and explore their feelings as they see fit, even if it's not "correct" by someone else's standards. They gain the knowledge to recognize when to let go of—or change—relationships that are hurting them and, more importantly, how to ask for help.
So is this a sad book? Yes. But it's also powerful, insightful, hopeful, and cathartic. It's a story about grief, obviously, but it's also perfect if you're looking for a story with a queer MC that isn't inherently about queerness, or if you want a story without a romantic storyline, or a story that beautifully handles growing through friendship break-ups. There's so much packed into this book, and it's written with such care and nuance, as only Mason Deaver can display.
This is the second perfect book that Mason has written, in my humble opinion, and I think if you're in the right place to handle it, then it is absolutely essential reading.
Mason Deaver has truly outdone themself in this nuanced exploration about how grief defines and changes us.
While The Ghosts We Keep is certainly a heavy, harrowing, and possibly triggering story for some readers, I think it's also very much a necessary story that puts the reader on a path towards catharsis. So often in fiction—and in life—death can be romanticized as it gets processed, and that's especially true for the dead, who we are often told to remember "kindly." But grief and loss is so much more complicated than that, and this is a book that intimately understands the ups and downs of that process.
I love this story explores different degrees of grief. Not every single person has the same kind of relationship with the deceased, by definition. Some are parents, some are siblings, some are friends, some are lovers, and some are merely acquaintances. This is a story that shows how different people grieve in their own ways, all of which are appropriate and valid according to the unique relationship they had with the person who passed away. No single relationship can truly capture the fullness of one life, and therefore no two people's grief will look exactly the same. And that doesn't mean one way of grieving is "less" than the other, just that they're different.
Liam is realizing that they're at a very different point with their grief as compared to their parents, their family, and their classmates. While his parents might be ready to start sorting through Ethan's belongings, for example, Liam may not be at that point yet, and he has to learn that that's okay.
The story also explores how people outside of the immediate family relate to death and loss. If someone's only experience with loss is through a distant family member or a friend of the family, then that's a very different experience than losing a sibling or a son, and thus makes it almost impossible to "relate" to Liam's experience. Again, that doesn't mean what those other people experienced wasn't "real," but merely that it's a different type of loss that doesn't always neatly project onto the way someone else is grieving. This loss is something that Liam has work through themself at their own pace, even when they can't understand their own feelings or end up lashing out at other people. Grief is not this nice, convenient, neat, one-size-fits-all experience, and this story really gives Liam the space to go through it, for better or worse.
I also love how this story centers a non-binary character without necessarily being about non-binaryness at all, but also intimately understanding how Liam's non-binary identity is tied up in his grief.
When someone close to us dies young, there can be a tendency to venerate the dead and compare yourself to them, wondering if you "deserve" to live when they didn't get that chance. Liam is not only grieving the loss of their brother, but feeling burdened by being their parents' "last shot" at having a "normal," successful kid. That feeling is compounded by his queerness, because he's always thought of Ethan as "the normal one," "The Golden Boy," and his parents' shot at having some semblance of a "family legacy." He's very aware of how his future looks different than anything his parents would've imagined for Ethan, and how he can't give his parents the same things Ethan could have, just because of who he is and what he wants for himself.
This leaves them feeling a lot of shame and anxiety, simply because there is no defined, clear-cut path towards queer futures, and in fact queer futures are sometimes beyond our imagination simply because they've been erased from public consciousness. So Liam finds themself wondering how they can possibly fill the void that Ethan's left behind in their family, and if they're even meant to try in the first place.
I also appreciate how honestly this story tackles toxic friendships and friendship break-ups, which we don't see often enough in YA. Liam's best friends, Vanessa and Joel, are not only seeing less of Liam now that they're dating each other, but they find Liam's grief to be "a downer" and "an inconvenience" simply because Liam isn't ready to open up about it. So not only is Liam left dealing with anger, confusion, and heartbreak all at once, but they're also struggling to navigate how people expect them to perform grief. He's cycling through all these emotions, which can sometimes be destructive, and that only gets compounded by friends who are mishandling his processing of grief. Sometimes the people closest to us aren't the right people to help us through difficult things, and sometimes those relationships exacerbate toxic behavior and situations, even if all parties are trying to come from a "good place"—and it's important to know when to walk away from relationships that aren't serving us.
But as much as this story deals with loss—losing a brother, losing connection to other people, losing friends—it's still ultimately about what Liam gains. Through all of this, Liam gains a new friendship with Ethan's best friend, Marcus. They gain a new understanding of their brother as they go through his things and hear from the people who were closest to him. They gain confidence in their right to process and explore their feelings as they see fit, even if it's not "correct" by someone else's standards. They gain the knowledge to recognize when to let go of—or change—relationships that are hurting them and, more importantly, how to ask for help.
So is this a sad book? Yes. But it's also powerful, insightful, hopeful, and cathartic. It's a story about grief, obviously, but it's also perfect if you're looking for a story with a queer MC that isn't inherently about queerness, or if you want a story without a romantic storyline, or a story that beautifully handles growing through friendship break-ups. There's so much packed into this book, and it's written with such care and nuance, as only Mason Deaver can display.
This is the second perfect book that Mason has written, in my humble opinion, and I think if you're in the right place to handle it, then it is absolutely essential reading.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death, Grief, Mental illness, and Panic attacks/disorders
Moderate: Car accident, Self harm, and Suicidal thoughts
Minor: Vomit
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