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redcabinreads's review against another edition
5.0
“Instead of trying so hard to forget, we try softer by becoming engaged, attentive observers of our bodies, minds, and spirits so that we can give each of those parts what it actually needs to heal.”
If you read one “self help” book this year, let this be it. I have gained so much by this book. Instead of pushing myself to try harder, I’ve learned what it means to try softer. To love myself as I love others. To pay attention to my body and my feelings. To speak to my inner child, to love her and care for her. I love how each chapter focuses on a different thing to try softer on (attention, body, emotions, internal critic, resilience); as well as super helpful practical exercises.
This book is therapy in itself, and it’s masterfully done.
You’ll love this if you:
•want to understand your body/feeling connection
•have trouble setting boundaries
•feel disconnected from yourself
•want to feel like someone is hugging you as they tell you, “you are okay”
“What if - just for a change - instead of trying harder, you tried… softer?”
If you read one “self help” book this year, let this be it. I have gained so much by this book. Instead of pushing myself to try harder, I’ve learned what it means to try softer. To love myself as I love others. To pay attention to my body and my feelings. To speak to my inner child, to love her and care for her. I love how each chapter focuses on a different thing to try softer on (attention, body, emotions, internal critic, resilience); as well as super helpful practical exercises.
This book is therapy in itself, and it’s masterfully done.
You’ll love this if you:
•want to understand your body/feeling connection
•have trouble setting boundaries
•feel disconnected from yourself
•want to feel like someone is hugging you as they tell you, “you are okay”
“What if - just for a change - instead of trying harder, you tried… softer?”
annalisenak97's review
5.0
I read this book at exactly the right time in my life. Kolber's argument for self-compassion and gentleness in mental health and resilience building is exactly what I needed. The exercises in this book are clear, gentle and sustainable-- meaning the reader can take them into any situation. The combination of Christian beliefs, psychology, and A&P is what I look for in potential therapists, and it's present in this book which is great. I've learned so much about my mind and my body and what they both need from me. I will be returning to this gentle, challenging resource for sure.
rwlongino's review against another edition
4.0
I found Kolber's approach thoughtfully laid out and she does solid work in addressing the challenges of anxiety with practical skills. While readers who are well-versed with therapy might find it pedestrian, her book is approachable for those who might not access therapy due to stigma or other reasons. She is very intentional about addressing the common experience of Christians who believe they can pray their troubles away. Her use of scripture to illustrate why "trying softer" is in line with how Christ calls us to live is done mindfully and with integrity.
My one criticism is that there's no indication on the cover or the table of contents to indicate this is written from a Christian perspective. Perhaps that's intentional, but some readers might feel manipulated when they get to the theological commentary if they didn't know that was going to be a significant part of her thesis.
My one criticism is that there's no indication on the cover or the table of contents to indicate this is written from a Christian perspective. Perhaps that's intentional, but some readers might feel manipulated when they get to the theological commentary if they didn't know that was going to be a significant part of her thesis.
asanden's review against another edition
3.0
I wanted to like this book but it was way to clinical mixed with Christianity and self help. There were great suggestions for coping with anxiety and stress and overall I agreed with the “try softer” mentality but the book was mixed with so much clinical information that I felt the meat of what she was trying to convey was lost.
sarah_reading_party's review
5.0
Try Softer by Aundi Kolber is an excellent read. Regardless of the circumstances in your life, I think literally everyone could benefit from this book. I appreciated the mix of psychology/neuroscience (normalized for those non-therapists among us), Aundi's personal story, and her deep love for Jesus. These elements added together to gently encourage readers to move towards healing and wholeness.
There are many practical tips sprinkled throughout the book but it is very evident that personal growth is not "one size fits all" so Aundi does encourage readers to engage with family/friends or a counselor throughout the process. The exercises Aundi teaches her readers are related to mindfulness and on at least one occasion, she does encourage readers to adapt the exercise if they wish to for faith-based reasons.
This will be a book to return to in the future. I learned so much from it, and came away with extraordinary hope. Well done!
There are many practical tips sprinkled throughout the book but it is very evident that personal growth is not "one size fits all" so Aundi does encourage readers to engage with family/friends or a counselor throughout the process. The exercises Aundi teaches her readers are related to mindfulness and on at least one occasion, she does encourage readers to adapt the exercise if they wish to for faith-based reasons.
This will be a book to return to in the future. I learned so much from it, and came away with extraordinary hope. Well done!
ayessa's review against another edition
What a beautiful book. Thank you, Aundi Kolber, for reminding us of God's compassionate, gentle, and gracious heart towards His beloved children.
smbcoffee's review
4.0
So good! Kolber’s writing resonated with me as she encouraged embodiment and mindfulness practices.