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249 reviews for:
The Chimp Paradox: The Acclaimed Mind Management Programme to Help You Achieve Success, Confidence and Happiness
Steve Peters
3.74 AVERAGE
249 reviews for:
The Chimp Paradox: The Acclaimed Mind Management Programme to Help You Achieve Success, Confidence and Happiness
Steve Peters
3.74 AVERAGE
hopeful
informative
inspiring
medium-paced
I know a number of people that need to read this book.
I have struggled for the past 15 or so years with the problems tackled in this book, mostly with being insecure and unable to present my 'true' self when it mattered. In the course of this development process, I have established many of the strategies outlined by Prof. Peters and have indeed learned the hard way that I need to learn to manage my emotional reactions because many of them are just malfuntioning due to bad experiences in the past. Since I'd already established much of this myself, I listened to the audiobook more as a motivational speech, although it did sharpen my focus on some aspects. I can only warmly recommend it.
Why not five stars? The book explains the theory but it does not consider the practical application in enough detail, in my assessment. Changing yourself, working against your instinctual beliefs and automatic reactions is, as Steve Peters points out himself when stating that your 'chimp' is five times stronger than your 'human', really hard work. Starting that with some theoretical ideas in mind alone is setting yourself up for failure. What I would have liked to hear from him are some practical guidelines. He mentions once or twice to involve friends in 'training your chimp', but surely there is more. I, for example, found using a diary very helpful for a time, in which I listed positive experiences each day, small moments of success on my mission of opening up and being more confident. It can be a tool for those ten minutes (or more) of daily inner reflection the author mentions and allows to look back on your progress and feel good about it. Especially when you're currently feeling you're not making progress, having some form of tangible measure in such a form can help motivate you.
I also thought that his illustrations of his concepts were clumsy at times. Why do you put confidence onto a different planet, which automatically invokes the feeling of being out of reach? Why do you mix the concept of a confidence planet with moons encircling it with that of a confidence machine with various cogs?
Still, these are issues that could be improved but do not deminish the value of the advice given.
I have struggled for the past 15 or so years with the problems tackled in this book, mostly with being insecure and unable to present my 'true' self when it mattered. In the course of this development process, I have established many of the strategies outlined by Prof. Peters and have indeed learned the hard way that I need to learn to manage my emotional reactions because many of them are just malfuntioning due to bad experiences in the past. Since I'd already established much of this myself, I listened to the audiobook more as a motivational speech, although it did sharpen my focus on some aspects. I can only warmly recommend it.
Why not five stars? The book explains the theory but it does not consider the practical application in enough detail, in my assessment. Changing yourself, working against your instinctual beliefs and automatic reactions is, as Steve Peters points out himself when stating that your 'chimp' is five times stronger than your 'human', really hard work. Starting that with some theoretical ideas in mind alone is setting yourself up for failure. What I would have liked to hear from him are some practical guidelines. He mentions once or twice to involve friends in 'training your chimp', but surely there is more. I, for example, found using a diary very helpful for a time, in which I listed positive experiences each day, small moments of success on my mission of opening up and being more confident. It can be a tool for those ten minutes (or more) of daily inner reflection the author mentions and allows to look back on your progress and feel good about it. Especially when you're currently feeling you're not making progress, having some form of tangible measure in such a form can help motivate you.
I also thought that his illustrations of his concepts were clumsy at times. Why do you put confidence onto a different planet, which automatically invokes the feeling of being out of reach? Why do you mix the concept of a confidence planet with moons encircling it with that of a confidence machine with various cogs?
Still, these are issues that could be improved but do not deminish the value of the advice given.
[a: Dr Steve Peters] presents a model to understand ourselves and our minds with visual metaphors that everyone can relate with. Within us there is not a unique person, but rather a human and a chimp. We are the human, the chimp is a leftover of our evolution that we cannot get rid of. The human and the chimp share a computer and a stone of life. The stone holds our values and believes.
The paradox of the chimp is that it can be both our best friend and our biggest problem. It's up to us, the human, to learn to manage, nurture, and live with the chimp.
This model is then set in a psychological universe. A the center lays sun of self actualization, around which revolve a number of planets such as happiness and securities. Some planets have moons that stabilise them. While exploring the psychological universe [a: Peters|16549|Elizabeth Peters|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1232144920p2/16549.jpg] provides tools and exercises to manage and nurture the chimp.
I liked this book because it answers a questions I often have such as "why did I do that?", "why do I feel so stressed out right now?". A lot of what we feel is due to the chimp taking control and imposing on us their view of the world based on primordial emotions and insecurities. There's a lot we can do about it, from "feeding the chimp bananas" to working on slowly transforming bad automatic behaviour, "gremlins", into good ones, "autopilot". But to an extent we just need to learn to live with our chimp and their flaws.
The book has many actionable takeaways, with most chapters proposing exercises to work on getting the human to take control. One that stuck out with me is that when feeling stressed is vital to exercise your chimp. Find a friend, a professional, or even just a journal, and let your chimp scream. Vent it all out. Get it off your chest. After a while the chimp will get tired and the human will be able to take over. You'll realise that a lot of what you felt was actually the chimp, and you'll be able to apply reason, gain perspective, and calm down.
You can learn more about the model without buying the book by visiting the official website.
The paradox of the chimp is that it can be both our best friend and our biggest problem. It's up to us, the human, to learn to manage, nurture, and live with the chimp.
This model is then set in a psychological universe. A the center lays sun of self actualization, around which revolve a number of planets such as happiness and securities. Some planets have moons that stabilise them. While exploring the psychological universe [a: Peters|16549|Elizabeth Peters|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1232144920p2/16549.jpg] provides tools and exercises to manage and nurture the chimp.
I liked this book because it answers a questions I often have such as "why did I do that?", "why do I feel so stressed out right now?". A lot of what we feel is due to the chimp taking control and imposing on us their view of the world based on primordial emotions and insecurities. There's a lot we can do about it, from "feeding the chimp bananas" to working on slowly transforming bad automatic behaviour, "gremlins", into good ones, "autopilot". But to an extent we just need to learn to live with our chimp and their flaws.
The book has many actionable takeaways, with most chapters proposing exercises to work on getting the human to take control. One that stuck out with me is that when feeling stressed is vital to exercise your chimp. Find a friend, a professional, or even just a journal, and let your chimp scream. Vent it all out. Get it off your chest. After a while the chimp will get tired and the human will be able to take over. You'll realise that a lot of what you felt was actually the chimp, and you'll be able to apply reason, gain perspective, and calm down.
You can learn more about the model without buying the book by visiting the official website.
Weird illustrations (remind me of Wait but Why?), but interesting and useful theory.
How to outsmart your inner monkey.
The Chimp Paradox (2012) is about the complicated and crazy mess that is the human brain. These blinks explain why people can be calm, rational and composed one minute and irrational and irate the next. Learn how you can keep your cool when faced with triggering situations. The book was written by Professor Steve Peters. He is an acclaimed psychiatrist who specializes in improving the performance and functionality of people’s brains. He works with a number of successful business people and athletes, such as the players of the FC Liverpool soccer team.
My Notes:
This chimp-like part of our brain affects our decisions, emotions and how we interact with other people. Sometimes it’s in conflict with the more rational and human side of our brain and makes us behave in ways we might otherwise try to avoid.
The human brain has two primary ways of thinking that easily come into conflict with one another.
Our brains are divided into two distinct parts. The first is the “human,” or rational, part, which is located in the frontal lobe. This part of the brain thinks and acts based on facts. The second part, which lives in the limbic system, is known as the inner chimp. The functions of this section of the brain are more primitive and immediate. In other words, the chimp part of the brain acts based on feelings and emotions. Naturally these two ways of processing information can easily come into conflict, and when they do, the chimp brain often prevails.
To avoid these uncomfortable clashes, it’s key for the human brain to actively manage the chimp brain.
Manage your inner chimp by giving it room to vent.
First, in any given interaction, you should begin by determining which section of your brain is directing your behavior: Is it the human or the chimp? To figure this out, you can ask yourself simple questions that begin with, “Do I want…?” By answering them, you’ll learn which part of the brain you’re following.For instance, you might ask yourself, “Do I want to behave this way?” or “Do I want to feel these feelings?” If you answer no to these questions, it’s a sure sign that the chimp is in control.
Reign in this emotional side of yourself by giving it a little exercise. We’re not talking jumping rope or jogging. Rather, exercising your inner chimp is about giving it the freedom to vent.
For this technique to be effective, a truly safe environment is absolutely necessary.
Automatic functioning is essential to human existence, but it has a destructive side.
It’s called the computer and it’s responsible for automatic functions based on learned patterns.This is essential since autopilot plays a major role in the lives of most humans. Such automatic behavior is based on patterns you’ve learned, beliefs you’ve absorbed and programs you’ve established.
However, not all automation is useful. There are also nefarious elements to the automatic functioning of the brain. These are called goblins. They’re the destructive patterns you’ve formed based on lived experience and, just like their useful counterparts, they’re stored in your computer.
Do all one can to discourage the formation of goblins.
Get rid of your goblins by identifying them and replacing them with positive alternatives.
To handle them, you’ll need to get your computer into shape, and that means implanting positive patterns. Here’s how to do it:First, you need to identify which goblins actually reside within your computer. This initial step is essential since both the chimp and the human parts of your brain look to the computer when they don’t know how to act. And if there’s a goblin in the computer – say, a negative behavioral pattern – the result will be unsettling for both the emotional chimp and the rational human.Unfortunately, goblins are often well hidden, resulting in all kinds of issues.
Once you’ve figured out that there’s a goblin in your computer, you can simply replace it with a positive pattern.
From there, you should be attentive to your state of mind and work to notice when the negative goblin rears its head. Every time it does, just replace it with the positive view until it becomes absolutely automatic. If you can manage to build in this new autopilot, you’ll eventually deal with difficult situations politely, without even giving it a second thought.
The chimp tends to forget that different people have different brains.
Being able to hear where other people are coming from is essential to navigating the world, and if you want to do this well, you need to calm down your chimp. Once you do, you’ll realize that different people have different brains. This might come as a surprise since people tend to assume that the brains of others work just like theirs. But this assumption inevitably leads to misunderstandings, which in turn anger the chimp.
First, don’t assume anything about other people. Just because someone appears distant or distracted doesn’t necessarily imply that they’re unfriendly. They might just be dealing with a personal problem you know nothing about.Second, don’t have unreasonable expectations of others. After all, people make mistakes and expecting them to be perfect all the time is a recipe for disappointment. And, finally, it’s essential to abandon all prejudice, both positive and negative. It’s best to simply take people as they are and try to get to know them.
People communicate in four basic ways, and knowing how to get your point across without getting aggressive is key.
Let’s take a look at the four basic ways that people communicate, all of which involve your chimp and human brains. First, your human brain can communicate with another human brain. Second, your human brain can communicate with someone else’s chimp brain. Third, your chimp can communicate with another person’s human brain and, finally, your chimp can communicate with another chimp.In this final scenario, the results tend to be pretty ugly and the resulting calamity is familiar to anyone who has seen a couple in an argument. To avoid such unpleasantness, let’s take a look at how to set up ideal conditions from the get-go.
Deal with issues as they arise and to speak in an assertive but not aggressive way. People tend to talk about such problems with everyone but the person they have an issue with.
Assertiveness, on the other hand, is about explaining where you’re coming from.
Getting healthy is easy if you focus on solutions instead of problems.
When faced with this contradiction, focusing on problems like being overweight will only strengthen your inner chimp, since the worse you feel about yourself, the more you’ll seek out the quick comforts of junk food and laziness. So, instead of falling into this trap, just focus on what you want. In this case, that means getting some exercise and shedding a few pounds.In other words, to get healthy, you’ve got to be both proactive and responsive. The former means having a plan and the latter means that, if your plan fails, you’ll be able to regroup and patch things together.
Instead of dwelling on your failures, try telling your workout buddy how much you enjoy your gym time and how much progress you’re making. Such a simple comment will encourage your emotional chimp, whose only goal is to feel good and save face. Chances are, you’ll happily turn up at the gym next time around to prove to your friend that you were serious.
Seek out happiness and celebrate your victories.
Happiness is actually a choice? That doesn’t mean that you get to be happy whenever you want, but, rather, that life has its ups and downs, and that you can actively work to have more good times and fewer bad ones.
It’s all about adding good things to your life. Remember: there’s nothing superficial about seeking out what you need to be happy.
The real issue with happiness is that the chimp part of your brain will never be satisfied; it will always seek out more, dangerously leading to achievement, but not happiness.
Final summary
The key message in this book:Your brain is composed of distinct parts, each operating according to its own internal logic. Some are rational, thoughtful and objective, while others are highly emotional and impulsive or simply automatic. While such differences can naturally come into conflict, you can manage them through awareness and training.
The Chimp Paradox (2012) is about the complicated and crazy mess that is the human brain. These blinks explain why people can be calm, rational and composed one minute and irrational and irate the next. Learn how you can keep your cool when faced with triggering situations. The book was written by Professor Steve Peters. He is an acclaimed psychiatrist who specializes in improving the performance and functionality of people’s brains. He works with a number of successful business people and athletes, such as the players of the FC Liverpool soccer team.
My Notes:
This chimp-like part of our brain affects our decisions, emotions and how we interact with other people. Sometimes it’s in conflict with the more rational and human side of our brain and makes us behave in ways we might otherwise try to avoid.
The human brain has two primary ways of thinking that easily come into conflict with one another.
Our brains are divided into two distinct parts. The first is the “human,” or rational, part, which is located in the frontal lobe. This part of the brain thinks and acts based on facts. The second part, which lives in the limbic system, is known as the inner chimp. The functions of this section of the brain are more primitive and immediate. In other words, the chimp part of the brain acts based on feelings and emotions. Naturally these two ways of processing information can easily come into conflict, and when they do, the chimp brain often prevails.
To avoid these uncomfortable clashes, it’s key for the human brain to actively manage the chimp brain.
Manage your inner chimp by giving it room to vent.
First, in any given interaction, you should begin by determining which section of your brain is directing your behavior: Is it the human or the chimp? To figure this out, you can ask yourself simple questions that begin with, “Do I want…?” By answering them, you’ll learn which part of the brain you’re following.For instance, you might ask yourself, “Do I want to behave this way?” or “Do I want to feel these feelings?” If you answer no to these questions, it’s a sure sign that the chimp is in control.
Reign in this emotional side of yourself by giving it a little exercise. We’re not talking jumping rope or jogging. Rather, exercising your inner chimp is about giving it the freedom to vent.
For this technique to be effective, a truly safe environment is absolutely necessary.
Automatic functioning is essential to human existence, but it has a destructive side.
It’s called the computer and it’s responsible for automatic functions based on learned patterns.This is essential since autopilot plays a major role in the lives of most humans. Such automatic behavior is based on patterns you’ve learned, beliefs you’ve absorbed and programs you’ve established.
However, not all automation is useful. There are also nefarious elements to the automatic functioning of the brain. These are called goblins. They’re the destructive patterns you’ve formed based on lived experience and, just like their useful counterparts, they’re stored in your computer.
Do all one can to discourage the formation of goblins.
Get rid of your goblins by identifying them and replacing them with positive alternatives.
To handle them, you’ll need to get your computer into shape, and that means implanting positive patterns. Here’s how to do it:First, you need to identify which goblins actually reside within your computer. This initial step is essential since both the chimp and the human parts of your brain look to the computer when they don’t know how to act. And if there’s a goblin in the computer – say, a negative behavioral pattern – the result will be unsettling for both the emotional chimp and the rational human.Unfortunately, goblins are often well hidden, resulting in all kinds of issues.
Once you’ve figured out that there’s a goblin in your computer, you can simply replace it with a positive pattern.
From there, you should be attentive to your state of mind and work to notice when the negative goblin rears its head. Every time it does, just replace it with the positive view until it becomes absolutely automatic. If you can manage to build in this new autopilot, you’ll eventually deal with difficult situations politely, without even giving it a second thought.
The chimp tends to forget that different people have different brains.
Being able to hear where other people are coming from is essential to navigating the world, and if you want to do this well, you need to calm down your chimp. Once you do, you’ll realize that different people have different brains. This might come as a surprise since people tend to assume that the brains of others work just like theirs. But this assumption inevitably leads to misunderstandings, which in turn anger the chimp.
First, don’t assume anything about other people. Just because someone appears distant or distracted doesn’t necessarily imply that they’re unfriendly. They might just be dealing with a personal problem you know nothing about.Second, don’t have unreasonable expectations of others. After all, people make mistakes and expecting them to be perfect all the time is a recipe for disappointment. And, finally, it’s essential to abandon all prejudice, both positive and negative. It’s best to simply take people as they are and try to get to know them.
People communicate in four basic ways, and knowing how to get your point across without getting aggressive is key.
Let’s take a look at the four basic ways that people communicate, all of which involve your chimp and human brains. First, your human brain can communicate with another human brain. Second, your human brain can communicate with someone else’s chimp brain. Third, your chimp can communicate with another person’s human brain and, finally, your chimp can communicate with another chimp.In this final scenario, the results tend to be pretty ugly and the resulting calamity is familiar to anyone who has seen a couple in an argument. To avoid such unpleasantness, let’s take a look at how to set up ideal conditions from the get-go.
Deal with issues as they arise and to speak in an assertive but not aggressive way. People tend to talk about such problems with everyone but the person they have an issue with.
Assertiveness, on the other hand, is about explaining where you’re coming from.
Getting healthy is easy if you focus on solutions instead of problems.
When faced with this contradiction, focusing on problems like being overweight will only strengthen your inner chimp, since the worse you feel about yourself, the more you’ll seek out the quick comforts of junk food and laziness. So, instead of falling into this trap, just focus on what you want. In this case, that means getting some exercise and shedding a few pounds.In other words, to get healthy, you’ve got to be both proactive and responsive. The former means having a plan and the latter means that, if your plan fails, you’ll be able to regroup and patch things together.
Instead of dwelling on your failures, try telling your workout buddy how much you enjoy your gym time and how much progress you’re making. Such a simple comment will encourage your emotional chimp, whose only goal is to feel good and save face. Chances are, you’ll happily turn up at the gym next time around to prove to your friend that you were serious.
Seek out happiness and celebrate your victories.
Happiness is actually a choice? That doesn’t mean that you get to be happy whenever you want, but, rather, that life has its ups and downs, and that you can actively work to have more good times and fewer bad ones.
It’s all about adding good things to your life. Remember: there’s nothing superficial about seeking out what you need to be happy.
The real issue with happiness is that the chimp part of your brain will never be satisfied; it will always seek out more, dangerously leading to achievement, but not happiness.
Final summary
The key message in this book:Your brain is composed of distinct parts, each operating according to its own internal logic. Some are rational, thoughtful and objective, while others are highly emotional and impulsive or simply automatic. While such differences can naturally come into conflict, you can manage them through awareness and training.
Lots of good nuggets in the book with practical tips on what to do ; I did not rate this higher because I felt that there were too many frameworks in the book to remember - from the chimp / human / computer model (useful!) to the 7 "planets" on how to achieve your dreams, so as a quick read, it's quite difficult to mentally piece the elements together.
Mind management Bible. A must read(and re-visit!).
I'm usually a slow reader when it comes to non-fiction. Having finished this in a little over a week, this book was an exception.
The book addresses a surprising range of topics, including controlling unwanted emotions, effective communication, and self-esteem. Some of these topics are given more attention than others, and most of the book focuses on how to manage your "chimp", the emotional part of the brain, which can sometimes act in unwanted ways, and even, according to Dr Peters, cause you to sabotage your own success.
The book also places a lot of emphasis on replacing unhelpful thoughts which Peters calls "gremlins" which more helpful ones, which he calls "autopilots" (a similar idea is used in CBT).
I was particularly grateful for the refreshingly straightforward exercises at the end of each chapter. These generally don't take too much time, and are often small challenges which you can fit into your everyday life, rather than needing to fill out large worksheets and diagrams. The tasks which do require writing are no more strenuous than they need to be to get you thinking.
I particularly enjoyed the section on effective communication and an exercise in which I was asked to create my own "stone of life". This basically involved writing out my values, a set of helpful "truths" to promote realistic expectations, and my "life force", a list describing how I want to live my life and what I want to achieve.
The only reason I've decided not to give The Chimp Paradox five stars is because the language of "gremlins" and "chimps" and "moons" and "planets" became annoying after a while, and began to sound a little patronising. There were also a couple of pieces of advice that I know don't quite fit with my values, but those were easily ignored - they were usually just short sentences which were intended to build self-esteem, but instead just flashed up as "false".
Whilst it's not strictly a self-help book, I would highly recommend this to anyone who finds themselves standing in the way of their own success and wishes to change their mindset.
The book addresses a surprising range of topics, including controlling unwanted emotions, effective communication, and self-esteem. Some of these topics are given more attention than others, and most of the book focuses on how to manage your "chimp", the emotional part of the brain, which can sometimes act in unwanted ways, and even, according to Dr Peters, cause you to sabotage your own success.
The book also places a lot of emphasis on replacing unhelpful thoughts which Peters calls "gremlins" which more helpful ones, which he calls "autopilots" (a similar idea is used in CBT).
I was particularly grateful for the refreshingly straightforward exercises at the end of each chapter. These generally don't take too much time, and are often small challenges which you can fit into your everyday life, rather than needing to fill out large worksheets and diagrams. The tasks which do require writing are no more strenuous than they need to be to get you thinking.
I particularly enjoyed the section on effective communication and an exercise in which I was asked to create my own "stone of life". This basically involved writing out my values, a set of helpful "truths" to promote realistic expectations, and my "life force", a list describing how I want to live my life and what I want to achieve.
The only reason I've decided not to give The Chimp Paradox five stars is because the language of "gremlins" and "chimps" and "moons" and "planets" became annoying after a while, and began to sound a little patronising. There were also a couple of pieces of advice that I know don't quite fit with my values, but those were easily ignored - they were usually just short sentences which were intended to build self-esteem, but instead just flashed up as "false".
Whilst it's not strictly a self-help book, I would highly recommend this to anyone who finds themselves standing in the way of their own success and wishes to change their mindset.
Whilst it had some interesting incites the metaphors did not really work for me so was not an effective tool.