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Graphic: Mental illness, Sexual content, Toxic relationship, Toxic friendship, Injury/Injury detail
Moderate: Emotional abuse
Minor: Death of parent
Graphic: Domestic abuse, Mental illness, Sexual content, Death of parent
Moderate: Emotional abuse, Medical content, Injury/Injury detail
Graphic: Mental illness, Sexual content, Toxic friendship, Injury/Injury detail
Minor: Bullying, Child abuse, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse
Minor: Child abuse, Domestic abuse, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Mental illness, Medical content, Medical trauma, Toxic friendship
Graphic: Sexual content
Moderate: Child abuse, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Mental illness, Death of parent
Moderate: Mental illness
Minor: Death of parent, Injury/Injury detail
overstimulation/repetitive orgasms and throwing a good girl in sometimes doesn’t automatically mean bdsm 🥲
🩱single, first person POV (FMC)
🩱college/university athletics
🩱accurate premed representation
🩱power exchange/mild BDSM
🩱FWB/secret-ish relationship
Graphic: Mental illness, Sexual content
Moderate: Child abuse, Toxic friendship
Minor: Bullying
Moderate: Mental illness, Toxic relationship, Toxic friendship
Minor: Bullying, Death of parent
Truthfully, I did not have super high expectations (a crime, because I’ve very rarely been less than blown away by Ali Hazelwood)—her last novel, Not in Love, had me feeling like her novels tended to follow a formula, her heroines and MMCs often having similar paths. However, I clearly did not consider how much fun Hazelwood’s take on a college romance—a sports AND college romance—would be. While her previous novels (other than Check & Mate, I would argue, because it’s technically YA fiction), have been leaning toward darker, more moody atmospheres as of late, Deep End allows for Hazelwood’s comedy to shine. The novel is not without hard topics, of course—Scarlett’s family history, her struggles with anxiety, the exploration of sexual empowerment, and Lukas’ own past struggles are very real and written with sincerity and brevity. That being said, the college setting and the younger characters lended itself to a more playful and slightly more lighthearted telling.
One of my favorite things about Hazelwood’s work is that I always come away having learned something new (in addition to having my breath stolen away by romantic tension and MMCs that are chronically, debilitatingly down bad). I can tell her research is thorough and extensive—be it the different approaches to opening moves in chess or which part of the brain retain Britney Spears lyrics. Her writing feels confident on the chosen subject, making me feel like I’m being delightfully tricked into learning about something that was previously boring to me by a super cool professor. She achieves this again with the sport of diving (a very separate sport from just swimming, I now know). The physics, structure, and brutal dedication that the sport demands is beautifully romanticized through Hazelwood’s eyes. The unforgiving surface of water from a fall of ten meters in the air, as well as the rigors of plowing a human body through its density during a freestyle race, is a reflection of a student athlete’s life. As a NARP myself, I gained a better understanding of the perils of college sports, but could also easily empathize with the general feelings that the college years bring upon young adults: the busy schedules, the nerves associated with meeting new people, the constant worry in the back of your head that you’re failing at something but maybe don’t even know it yet.
These common struggles, along with the fact that Scarlett is still mentally recovering from an injury that completely derailed her diving career and has left her on uneven ground in the world that used to be second nature to her, burden her with anxiety that she longs to escape, if only for a moment. Lukas, the ex-boyfriend of her team captain, also Swedish swimming legend and indomitable figure of few words and hard facts, is able to facilitate that escape once they learn that they share a common interest in kink. They find solace in each other as they explore this interest together, the trust that Lukas easily earns from Scarlett helping her learn to trust herself once again.
I really appreciated Hazelwood’s take on BDSM, not getting quite as adventurous as I thought she might (ie, no flogging, ball gags, or even any other instruments that I braced myself for). Instead, Hazelwood focuses on the psychological aspects of kink, of the freedom that the experience provides for its practitioners. “For once, I just want to be in my body, and not in my head.” By letting Lukas take control, Scarlett is finally able to free herself of her own expectations and the stress that she’s always beholden to.
This novel was delicious and tender and even hilarious at times. I’d like more Hazelwood college/sports romances immediately, please.
Graphic: Sexual content
Minor: Emotional abuse, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Grief, Death of parent
Graphic: Bullying, Domestic abuse, Mental illness, Sexual content, Injury/Injury detail