Reviews with content warning for Domestic abuse - How Not to Drown in a Glass of Water

I had checked this one out from the library on impulse (having enjoyed Cruz's first novel, Dominicana, and having seen a number of great reviews for this one). And literally while I had it checked out, the Aspen Words 2023 longlist got announced and this was on it! I haven't decided yet if I am planning to read the full longlist like I have the past couple years, but I'm thrilled that a number of the books this year are already ones I want to read (it's a great looking longlist, as always!). So, just in case I decide to go for this reading challenge for a third year, here's the first.

Cara Romero is in her mid-50s when she loses the job she's held for years becasue the lamp factory she worked in closes down. She is set up with a job counselor for "seniors" to help her find another employment opportunity and over the course of 12 sessions with this counselor Cara tells the story of her life. From gossip about her up-and-down relationships with all her neighbors in her rent-controlled housing in NYC, to her complicated relationship with her sister Angela, to the story of how she came to immigrate to America from the Dominican Republic, to her deepest, darkest secret(s) and the reasons her son, Fernando, is now estranged, Cara tells it all.

Y'all, this narrator! Cara is a force of voice from the very first page, her charisma and feisty personality hit you hard and fast and you cannot help falling in love with her. And even as, the further you read, the more you see that Cara spins her words/actions so as to never be her own fault, and it absolutely does make you angry, you still cannot help being drawn in by her perspective. You still want to give her the benefit of the doubt, when considering everything in light of her personal experiences and circumstances. By the end, all the reflection time her monologuing with the career counselor offers her gives the space to legitimately try to make changes. And you are back to feeling good about cheering for her (or the most part). And honestly, the tangibility and strength of her voice are so strong, and the emotional responses I had as she went through her story-telling, it was just...incredibly compelling as a result of Cruz's masterful writing. One final note on the writing, the flow of the Spanglish was rhythmic and lovely and one of my favorite things. (This was highlighted in a selection from a couple years ago as well, Fiebre Tropical, and I loved it then too.)

There were quite a few concepts and themes addressed in this novel, despite its short length, and they were all intertwined in such a smooth and authentic, and fully developed, way. A number of these could be emotionally fraught to read about, so please keep that in mind going into this as a reader. There was a really touching reflection on the way that a mother's trauma can be passed to a child, even as their only goal/thought is to protect them from whatever that trauma was happening to them too. In this case, it was mostly acted out as a conflating of homosexuality with softness, and a need to quash it in order to make a child strong enough to survive. It was tough and angering to read but a reality for many (especially, I think, in this first generation population - though that is absolutely a stereotype, and not always the case, either way, of course). It was heartbreaking in the way that that level of “love,” the fine lines of paranoia and protection, can cause such a rift. From a parental perspective, this MC, an older immigrant parent of adult-aged children is not one that I often see represented (usually we get their children's POVs), so that was original and I appreciated it, in both its peculiarities and universalities (like a parent's joint disappointment and relief when a child is just fine without them). And really, what a message about how the ties of family [traditionally] trump all else, even when it's not healthy or it looks like supporting someone unhealthy or that you'd rather not support...but you do it anyways because you feel like you must/have no choice (and maybe sometimes out of guilt/repayment). Phew - that was a lot.

There was an absolutely spectacular highlighting of the key role women play in their communities, that is, essentially, unpaid labor, without which communities and families would flounder/fail. However, it often goes unrecognized and the time/effort it takes is not considered in governmental definitions/expectations of “work.” This is even starker against the backdrop of financial hardship, access barriers, family dynamics and intergenerational differences, and the environmental concerns of gentrification and political landscape that Cara is portrayed within. Finally, I want to note what a gorgeous and subtle message this book holds on the importance of the role therapy can play (and healing it can provide), even/especially for the reluctant.

Just, really, what a tour de force of narrative voice Cruz has created in this novel. Cara Romero is compelling, humanly flawed, and genuinely trying - in short, absolutely and universally recognizable. And you literally cannot help but love her exposition. An understated and short novel that hits with an unexpected amount of emotional impact.

“When you need each other to survive, you forgive. That's the way it is.”

“You can plan all you want, but nature will always show you who's el jefe.”

“I learned the difficult way that you have to be gentle with your children, or you can lose them forever.”

“Anyway, I try not to think about the past, because what can we do about it?"

“Who wants to live in a lie? Freedom is being able to live your truth without having to apologize for it.”

“It is difficult to be happy for others when you have many problems.”

“Talking to you, all these weeks, has been very good for me. I have learned a lot. Talking always reminds me that no matter how difficult my life is, I have always found a solution to my problems. When I think about this, I am not afraid. We can do this. I can do it. Write this down: Cara Romero is still here, entera.”

Content Warnings

renh's review against another edition

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emotional funny reflective medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

Content Warnings

wholeottabooks's review against another edition

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sad fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

Synopsis: Cara Romero is a Latina mother that has lost her job during the Great Recession. She shares her life story over the course of 12 sessions with a job counselor.

My thoughts: Angie Cruz did a spectacular job with this novel. She delicately carried the complexities of a Latina identity in the United States. I felt like I had been sitting directly across from Cara and felt her voice, concerns, and longing deep in my heart. This novel gives a voice to a group of women that often do not have a voice, that do not have a second chance, that do not have the option of explaining themselves. I absolutely loved this book but felt it was a little longer than it needed to be and ended abruptly. This is a character that you can’t forget.

Content Warnings

tanishah's review against another edition

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emotional funny hopeful reflective fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

Content Warnings

anna_23's review against another edition

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challenging dark emotional funny hopeful lighthearted reflective slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

In this book we are part of the 12 sessions Cara Romero has to attend for the Senior Work Program, technically to only give enough information so her social worker can help her find a job, but often diving into her everyday life, her relationship with her family including her son, who she hasn't seen in around 20 years and the lives of her neighbors in a close knit community in Washington Heights.

This book is for certain, one of the books that affected me the most, emotionally, this year. I found myself slowly getting attached to Cara and getting invested in her struggles and the ones of her friends and family. Angie Cruz did a wonderful job putting us in the mindset of a flawed woman who first deflected the fact that she did things wrong in her life and slowly learned that while for her it came from a place of love and care, she still did things that hurt people, especially her son Fernando.

Also Cruz showed the slow and rocky road of questioning your own set and often harmful beliefs (like internalized misogyny, homophobia or toxic masculinity) and unlearning them. While also exploring why they manifested themselves in the first place.

While I am often not a fan of the one sided interview narrative, this time it really worked for me. Mainly, because Cruz gave Cara such a lively and engaging voice that I didn't feel like I lacked another perspective. I was glued to the page (or the audiobook narrator's voice, I guess) listening to her sad and honest observations of her own actions, her love and support for the people around her and the charming humor that often came from her love for horoscopes. And while we only got Cara's perspective, I felt I got enough information about the other characters to understand why they acted the way they did. Especially toward the middle, when Cara was more open to be honest about her flaws and past hurts, which opened the possibility for really cathartic and beautiful recountings of conversations that were a joy to read.

I also loved how central the importance of community was in this book, which is a theme I almost always love. It was so lovely to see the care this little apartment block had for each other, which was mostly made up of immigrants from different Latin American countries.

One of my favorite relationships was between Cara and her neighbor Lulu. All the small little details, like the way Lulu helps Cara to get up in the mornings when she is struggling and Cara helps Lulu when she is overwhelmed with her family.

Additionally, we see how the community has to stand up against the increasing gentrification of their neighborhood and the rising unemployment after the 2008 recession.

Between the sessions we get documents that Cara had to fill out or received during the duration of the novel, during which I first, found myself zoning out but later found to appreciate, especially thinking about how many documents have been found of people throughout history and, that different to Cara's fictional story, we are not able to hear the stories that are attached to them.

I listened to the audiobook and I recommend it to anybody, who has the access and possibility to listen to it. The producers put a lot of work into it adding music, outside noises and more. The narrators (Kimberly M. Wetherell and

Rossmery Almonte) did an incredible job and brought Cara Romero to live.

Highly, highly recommend this book and hope everyone will enjoy Cara Romero's story as much as I did!

Also if you liked the way the relationship was written between Evelyn and Joy in 'Everything, Everywhere, All at One' I would 100% give this a try!

Trigger Warnings: homophobia, misogynie, domestic violence

Content Warnings

serendipitysbooks's review

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emotional funny reflective medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.25

How Not to Drown in a Glass of Water is the story of Cara Romero, a 56 year old woman from the Dominican Republic, who now lives in the US and needs to find work following the closure of the factory where she had worked for many years.

Cara is a fantastic character, one not quickly forgotten. She’s got a strong, opinions and a vibrant personality, has lived through some hard times and had bad things happen to her, but has also made bad decisions and hurt others. She’s clearly got a heart of gold, but her actions don’t always reflect that. She’s incredibly easy to root for, even when her behaviour is infuriating. Or worse. Over the course of the book we see Cara grow as she recognises the role she has played in fracturing some relationships, and hurting those she loves most. It’s a rewarding journey to watch, to see her recognise her problematic behaviour, sit with the pain of that, and then take positive action to improve.

The structure of this book is unique. It unfolds over the course of twelve sessions Cara is required to have with a job counsellor in order to continue receiving unemployment insurance. The book is essentially a transcript of what Cara says during each session. We never hear from the counsellor - although I get the feeling she didn’t get a lot of opportunity to say much! Cara is clearly a talker and during the sessions shares much of her life, including the ups and downs of many key relationships including with her son, her sister and her neighbour. Interspersed with these are various documents such as her steadily increasing rent bills and job questionnaires.

I listened on audio which I recommend. The audio has high production values including sound effects, making it akin to listening to an old-fashioned audio play. In addition the narrator does a fabulous job with Cara and I appreciated hearing her voice with the correct accent and intonations. Not all the documents worked so well in the audio format, but they were a much smaller part of the book than the job counselling sessions. The pros of audio far outweighed the cons - at least for me.

Content Warnings

suzyreadsbooks's review against another edition

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4.0

A character study of Cara Romero, revealing the many endearing qualities of an older Dominican woman who has flaws and has done harm, but has had to keep moving forward with her life and do the best she can to help herself and her community.
We are essentially hearing a monologue for most of the 200 pages. The audiobook sound effects and narration made it a very immersive, full experience.

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