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3.54 AVERAGE
3.54 AVERAGE
The author had some good ideas but she was pretty lofty about implementing them. As a parent of 2 kids, I don't think being rigid works (as much as I wish it did) all the time. I do admire the achievements that Chua's daughters made, and Chua herself, for learning the lesson with her younger daughter. This book ties in with my favorite mothering book - one I recommend to all my pregnant friends - "Confessions of a Slacker Mom" albeit for different reasons. They both underscore the notion that too much praise and the noting of every single thing children do actually is counter-productive to children as a while and parenting in general. Save the big praise for the big accomplishments, and encourage them along the way.
If i were feeling generous, I'd give it another half star, but I'm not and also that's not possible anyway. I'll be a tiger reviewer doling out stars, so there. Glad that Chua has a sense of humor, but for me, that didn't translate into her writing coming across as witty or funny. Quick read.
I don't want to get into all the issues here, but I guess I'm glad I read the book, which clearly struck many nerves. A lot of the commentary on it is is actually what bugs me, like what people end up taking away. But that's not here nor there. Or maybe it is. Basically, it's one story that will now stand representational and reductive of everything. So get out there and write, mamas.
I don't want to get into all the issues here, but I guess I'm glad I read the book, which clearly struck many nerves. A lot of the commentary on it is is actually what bugs me, like what people end up taking away. But that's not here nor there. Or maybe it is. Basically, it's one story that will now stand representational and reductive of everything. So get out there and write, mamas.
Wonderful writing. Thoroughly enjoyed it. As a mum who also seeks to find the middle ground I feel encouraged by her story. Great book group choice.
I found this book to be really interesting. I did not like the mother at all(she was certainly way over the top), but at the same time found myself wishing I pushed my own kids (a little) harder.
I think the mother in the story feels like what people will find disagreeable about her is how she pushed her kids and verbally abused them. Personally she disgusted me as I feel like she is so entirely prejudiced against western families (odd since her husband is Jewish-American-he apparently is exempted because of his 'genius'). There are repeated comments about stereotypes of junk-food eating white people who don't care enough to push their kids to try.
It seems like she is telling her story so that people understand her and the Tiger moms better, but she doesn't seem to have tried to understand western families at all.
I think the mother in the story feels like what people will find disagreeable about her is how she pushed her kids and verbally abused them. Personally she disgusted me as I feel like she is so entirely prejudiced against western families (odd since her husband is Jewish-American-he apparently is exempted because of his 'genius'). There are repeated comments about stereotypes of junk-food eating white people who don't care enough to push their kids to try.
It seems like she is telling her story so that people understand her and the Tiger moms better, but she doesn't seem to have tried to understand western families at all.
Really interesting! I picked up this book partially because of the press it has received and partially because I teach at a boarding school with a significant Chinese student population. My Chinese students tend to be more intense and high performing than some of their American counterparts. I wanted to see if this book was representative of their experience. Chau's descriptions of what happens when a Western student brings home an A- versus what happens when a Chinese student brings home an A- made me laugh out loud. I am not quite sure she meant to be funny. I am a proponent of high expectations, but this woman is over the top! Her explanation of the different world view leading to her actions did in fact help me to see the pressures that my students face in a very different light. A valuable and thought provoking read.
I read this in one sitting. I'm not sure I liked it very much. It was good, no doubt about that, but I think my expectations tempered my interpretation of it. There was a lot of controversy about this book that I had been hearing when I first put it on my to-read list.
All the reviews I initially heard had been negative. Being that I generally at least try to be open-minded, I gave it a try. I'm very accepting of other cultures, and try to understand them as best I can, and I think that may be one of the things that bothered me in the style of this memoir. It seemed as though Chua just felt that all things "Western" were unnecessary or foolish. Rather than trying to embrace them, or at least be tolerant of them she wrote them off.
Now, I do understand that she had a very specific way of parenting, and that she wanted her children to be well rounded and cultured. There's absolutely nothing at all wrong with wanting that for one's children. But, I don't think it's right to put things like sleepovers down as a wast of time or "a terrible western institution" (page 161) I don't think I'd be the all around playdate mom, but I think that they can be important for teaching children better socialization skills, which is something Chua's older daughter struggled with at a young age. I think what most bothered me was the fact that for the most part she refused to try incorporating these sorts of things into their lives. That was mainly left up to her husband.
That is one point of the memoir that I felt was very unfair. It seemed as though her husband Jed fully supported her parenting decisions, (for the most part anyhow) and yet she refused to be a part of his attempts to infuse western culture into their household. It left me wondering why there didn't seem to be more contribution/interaction from her husband.
I was happy to see at the end that Chua seemed to reach some sort of consensus regarding her view of the culture clashes, but supporting Lulu with her tennis playing. And that the book ended on a relatively more positive note than the rest of the tone had been. There was a lot of talk of bitter yelling and screaming matches to be had within that family and it really doesn't seem like an easy household to have grown up in.
No family is perfect, and this novel shows what kind of work it takes to be part of a family that has so many different viewpoints to acknowledge and bring together. Not an easy task at all, but definitely a learning experience.
All the reviews I initially heard had been negative. Being that I generally at least try to be open-minded, I gave it a try. I'm very accepting of other cultures, and try to understand them as best I can, and I think that may be one of the things that bothered me in the style of this memoir. It seemed as though Chua just felt that all things "Western" were unnecessary or foolish. Rather than trying to embrace them, or at least be tolerant of them she wrote them off.
Now, I do understand that she had a very specific way of parenting, and that she wanted her children to be well rounded and cultured. There's absolutely nothing at all wrong with wanting that for one's children. But, I don't think it's right to put things like sleepovers down as a wast of time or "a terrible western institution" (page 161) I don't think I'd be the all around playdate mom, but I think that they can be important for teaching children better socialization skills, which is something Chua's older daughter struggled with at a young age. I think what most bothered me was the fact that for the most part she refused to try incorporating these sorts of things into their lives. That was mainly left up to her husband.
That is one point of the memoir that I felt was very unfair. It seemed as though her husband Jed fully supported her parenting decisions, (for the most part anyhow) and yet she refused to be a part of his attempts to infuse western culture into their household. It left me wondering why there didn't seem to be more contribution/interaction from her husband.
I was happy to see at the end that Chua seemed to reach some sort of consensus regarding her view of the culture clashes, but supporting Lulu with her tennis playing. And that the book ended on a relatively more positive note than the rest of the tone had been. There was a lot of talk of bitter yelling and screaming matches to be had within that family and it really doesn't seem like an easy household to have grown up in.
No family is perfect, and this novel shows what kind of work it takes to be part of a family that has so many different viewpoints to acknowledge and bring together. Not an easy task at all, but definitely a learning experience.
This book is the perfect example of how you shouldn't always believe what you read in the press. This is a story of a mother who strives to bring out the best in her children. You may not agree with her method, but she is going off of what she knows and how she grew up. She learns that sometimes you have to be flexible and treat each child differently. There is not one parenting method that works for every child. This book was blown way out of proportion by the media. I'm glad that I gave it a chance.
Some of her parenting techniques were appalling, but Chua can really write and I think in all the hysteria, most reviewers/readers misinterpreted the point of the book. She's actually quite clear about how she fell short as a parent, and the comeuppance she received from her daughter.
Spoiler-free review
Long story short, read it if you're interested in Education and the differences between China and the "Western" viewpoint. I don't think Amy Chua successfully portrays her "Chinese mother" role nor achieved the intentional "satirical" tone in her memoir. There's plenty of other good books to read in your free time, but, like I said, worth reading if you're interested in this topic.
Long story short, read it if you're interested in Education and the differences between China and the "Western" viewpoint. I don't think Amy Chua successfully portrays her "Chinese mother" role nor achieved the intentional "satirical" tone in her memoir. There's plenty of other good books to read in your free time, but, like I said, worth reading if you're interested in this topic.