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3.54 AVERAGE
3.54 AVERAGE
I'm definitely not a tiger mother, but this was an interesting and well written book.
I tried to separate my feelings on the book from my feelings about what the author believes, but it's hard. I suppose it's well written, but the authors beliefs bothered me so much that it was very hard to enjoy. Some portions were just hard to read. As I raise my first child, I can't imagine doing some of the things Amy espouses. I also can't agree with her argument that the only way for someone to truly be happy is to be the best at something. I think that sets you up for a lifetime of disappointment if you're not the best. And I do think that happiness is important for children...but I digress...I can definitely see why this book got so much attention when it was first published...
Not at all what I expected. The mom in this book is crazy (by my Western standards), but it's still an interesting take on parenting. There may be one or two nuggets of useful information that mesh with my parenting style.
I read this book out of curiosity--there had been a story about it in Huffington Post and the comments made by readers piqued my curiosity. This is not a parenting book! Rather, it is a look at the conflict facing a mother who thinks she knows the best way to parent her children, but is faced with the "Western" culture of parenting.
This book is not for the faint of heart! Despite some of my issues with this book, I believe that many of her concepts are actually sound. She has a firm belief in not letting your child give up: parents who let their children give up have low expectations and have little faith in what their children can accomplish. Chua does come off as a show off (which she admits), forceful, nagging, bossy, sharp-tongued (all of which she cops to), but part of this is behind her drive to make her children the very best they can.
Now, my main problem is that Chua constantly says that getting her children into recitals, getting them special lessons, special practices (for their music), she says she does all this for her children. I do think that Chua herself is a showoff, she likes to showcase her children for a bit of her own ego. But I think we all do this at some point. In some small part, we want our children to be successful so that the world views us as successful parents. And Chua states that the Chinese believe the children are extensions of the parent.
But like I said--it's not a parenting book! This is Chua's own tale of being a mother, and one that does so with touches of humor!
This book is not for the faint of heart! Despite some of my issues with this book, I believe that many of her concepts are actually sound. She has a firm belief in not letting your child give up: parents who let their children give up have low expectations and have little faith in what their children can accomplish. Chua does come off as a show off (which she admits), forceful, nagging, bossy, sharp-tongued (all of which she cops to), but part of this is behind her drive to make her children the very best they can.
Now, my main problem is that Chua constantly says that getting her children into recitals, getting them special lessons, special practices (for their music), she says she does all this for her children. I do think that Chua herself is a showoff, she likes to showcase her children for a bit of her own ego. But I think we all do this at some point. In some small part, we want our children to be successful so that the world views us as successful parents. And Chua states that the Chinese believe the children are extensions of the parent.
But like I said--it's not a parenting book! This is Chua's own tale of being a mother, and one that does so with touches of humor!
I decided I was going to figure out how to load library books onto my Nook if it killed me (it almost did) and I needed a test book. This was available and I remembered it being terribly controversial for a hot second, so I virtually tossed it in my cart. I was not at all prepared to enjoy it.
This is not a parenting manual. Rather Amy Chua, with her tongue firmly in cheek, talks about raising her daughters the Chinese way. Instead of feeding her children's egos by giving everyone a trophy and applauding their every action, Chua does so by forcing them to achieve and making them see what they are capable of.
This is not a parenting manual. Rather Amy Chua, with her tongue firmly in cheek, talks about raising her daughters the Chinese way. Instead of feeding her children's egos by giving everyone a trophy and applauding their every action, Chua does so by forcing them to achieve and making them see what they are capable of.
Ughhhh could not make it though the first few chapters
When I finished the book I wanted to cry. Not because Chua is horrible to her daughters, but because the love she and her daughters share is so evident. Here you a have a mother who was raised by Chinese parents and decides that since she turned out okay she wants to uphold her culture's parenting traditions. For one child it works fine for the other Chua has to make adjustments. But I'm impressed that despite the battles between her younger daughter, Lulu, and her self, Lulu has learned how to focus and achieve. In no way is her self esteem suffering, at least not from the perspective of the book (which Chua assures us in the last chapter her daughters had a hand in determining the content). I think there are positives and negatives from both Chinese and Western parenting that all parents should consider. My dad was pretty strict with us kids in the family and while I wouldn't approach parenting in all the same ways as he, I do like that he encouraged us to study, be polite and obedient, and want to do something with our lives.
This book actually remind me more to conservative way of East parenting, not exclusively Chinese. I've grown in the similar family rules, no party, curvew, no boyfriend, no playdates, etc. All of this remind me of my own family and my own childhood. My mom also likes to supervise me during my night study everyday until I was 18, placed an alarm beside me to count my pace on doing homework, and when I went slower than a minutes per problem, she would go hysteric and demand me to do the problem exactly a minute, sometimes she would just lock me in my house alone (she would be outside) with no electricity until I begged her to let me out and promised her to study.
And yes, despite many reviews that disagree about this kind of parenting, I'm often relying on my past childhood and feel much gratitude to be raised in that way. That kind of parenting has made me the way I am now, a student of the best university in my country, and until now my grade are fabulous. I like study so much now given the force my mom's gave me since I was little. I love to read so much now given the force my mom's made me to read every single day. And I'd never presured of it. I' m proud the way I am now, and that was thanks to this conservative parenting style.
And yes, despite many reviews that disagree about this kind of parenting, I'm often relying on my past childhood and feel much gratitude to be raised in that way. That kind of parenting has made me the way I am now, a student of the best university in my country, and until now my grade are fabulous. I like study so much now given the force my mom's gave me since I was little. I love to read so much now given the force my mom's made me to read every single day. And I'd never presured of it. I' m proud the way I am now, and that was thanks to this conservative parenting style.
