Take a photo of a barcode or cover
7.37k reviews for:
How to Keep House While Drowning: A Gentle Approach to Cleaning and Organizing
K.C. Davis
4.35 AVERAGE
7.37k reviews for:
How to Keep House While Drowning: A Gentle Approach to Cleaning and Organizing
K.C. Davis
4.35 AVERAGE
hopeful
informative
lighthearted
medium-paced
I’ve been following Davis for years on TikTok, but had somehow never read her first book. I mostly picked it up to see if I could recommend it to friends who are struggling, especially since Davis’ content has moved on in the past year or two. It is, indeed, a very good overview of Davis’ philosophy, most notably that care tasks (cleaning, hygiene, cooking, etc.) are morally neutral and are more about being functional than being “good” or “moral.” It’s an easy read and has “shortcuts” for ADHDers or other readers who just want to get to the quick core of the matter. Through it all, Davis is gentle, accepting, and helpful, which is exactly what I’d expect from her channel. I can indeed say that I recommend it.
I don't know why I keep saying that I should stop reading self-help books for things I don't need help with and then continue to read them, because I found this mildly to moderately irritating, and it's entirely my fault for picking it up in the first place.
First things first, let me tell you who this book is for. It's meant for people with ADHD, or any other neurodivergence that interferes with their ability to keep their space clean, decluttered and organised, but more specifically, for those who struggle with constant negative self-talk. If that sounds like you, you may find this book incredibly helpful.
I have been bestowed with a Venn diagram of ADHD and autism that keeps me yearning for new experiences while allowing me to enjoy routine and structure. I know it sounds like it shouldn't work, but somehow it does. It does, however, make things a little difficult while living with other people. I can keep anything organised that I want to keep organised and stick to habits that I'm genuinely invested in with relative ease. What I wanted from this book were tips for working with other people. The book-length version extended edition of these two videos (1, 2) by Caroline Winkler. While it does come into play, it's told from the author's perspective, a mother of two married to a man who is already willing to adapt to her way of doing things. I think it would be easier for me to get a divorce and live by myself.
Moreover, I seem to be in a minority, but I don't have any negative self-talk. I do not hate myself, have any reasons to hate myself, or have any internalised thought patterns from past trauma that make me feel guilty, or not "good enough" (whatever that means). I don't hate my body or how it looks, and I'm perfectly content with how my space looks and functions. This book is very heavy-handed when it comes to this specific aspect of people's psyches; the awful combination of Puritanical religious tradition and the capitalist expectation of "being productive" that's so pervasive in the US. I just don't buy into any of that.
There are things around the house that I care about and things I don't care about. I live with a bunch of fuzzy animals, and they shed constantly. It is physically impossible to keep the floors fur-free, so I vacuum every couple of days, and that's fine. I am not fine with having dirty dishes in the sink. I am one of those people who are able to clean as they go, the dishes go in the dishwasher after they're used, I turn the dishwasher on every night, and put everything away before I go to bed. My kitchen is always clean when I get up in the morning. Having a clean kitchen and breakfast set up to be eaten within 10 minutes is how I like to start my day, so I do that the day before. You have to figure out what things you care about. In this book, Davis talks about this and gives tips on how to come up with a system that works for you. You're either going to care about something enough to do it, you're going to pay somebody else to do it, or you're going to decide it doesn't matter.
Also addressed is the Sisyphean nature of doing household chores. I think the only cure for that is to make it an enjoyable experience. Rajiv Surendra can help with that. I found [b:Laundry Love: Finding Joy in a Common Chore|49247159|Laundry Love Finding Joy in a Common Chore|Patric Richardson|https://i.gr-assets.com/images/S/compressed.photo.goodreads.com/books/1581412101l/49247159._SY75_.jpg|74693499] helpful as well. As Camus said, “Il faut imaginer Sisyphe heureux”.
There is objectively nothing wrong with this book other than being a little repetitive with the self-hatred remediation. Nevertheless, if you think this sounds like something that will help you, it likely will. It just wasn't for me.
First things first, let me tell you who this book is for. It's meant for people with ADHD, or any other neurodivergence that interferes with their ability to keep their space clean, decluttered and organised, but more specifically, for those who struggle with constant negative self-talk. If that sounds like you, you may find this book incredibly helpful.
I have been bestowed with a Venn diagram of ADHD and autism that keeps me yearning for new experiences while allowing me to enjoy routine and structure. I know it sounds like it shouldn't work, but somehow it does. It does, however, make things a little difficult while living with other people. I can keep anything organised that I want to keep organised and stick to habits that I'm genuinely invested in with relative ease. What I wanted from this book were tips for working with other people. The book-length version extended edition of these two videos (1, 2) by Caroline Winkler. While it does come into play, it's told from the author's perspective, a mother of two married to a man who is already willing to adapt to her way of doing things. I think it would be easier for me to get a divorce and live by myself.
Moreover, I seem to be in a minority, but I don't have any negative self-talk. I do not hate myself, have any reasons to hate myself, or have any internalised thought patterns from past trauma that make me feel guilty, or not "good enough" (whatever that means). I don't hate my body or how it looks, and I'm perfectly content with how my space looks and functions. This book is very heavy-handed when it comes to this specific aspect of people's psyches; the awful combination of Puritanical religious tradition and the capitalist expectation of "being productive" that's so pervasive in the US. I just don't buy into any of that.
There are things around the house that I care about and things I don't care about. I live with a bunch of fuzzy animals, and they shed constantly. It is physically impossible to keep the floors fur-free, so I vacuum every couple of days, and that's fine. I am not fine with having dirty dishes in the sink. I am one of those people who are able to clean as they go, the dishes go in the dishwasher after they're used, I turn the dishwasher on every night, and put everything away before I go to bed. My kitchen is always clean when I get up in the morning. Having a clean kitchen and breakfast set up to be eaten within 10 minutes is how I like to start my day, so I do that the day before. You have to figure out what things you care about. In this book, Davis talks about this and gives tips on how to come up with a system that works for you. You're either going to care about something enough to do it, you're going to pay somebody else to do it, or you're going to decide it doesn't matter.
Also addressed is the Sisyphean nature of doing household chores. I think the only cure for that is to make it an enjoyable experience. Rajiv Surendra can help with that. I found [b:Laundry Love: Finding Joy in a Common Chore|49247159|Laundry Love Finding Joy in a Common Chore|Patric Richardson|https://i.gr-assets.com/images/S/compressed.photo.goodreads.com/books/1581412101l/49247159._SY75_.jpg|74693499] helpful as well. As Camus said, “Il faut imaginer Sisyphe heureux”.
There is objectively nothing wrong with this book other than being a little repetitive with the self-hatred remediation. Nevertheless, if you think this sounds like something that will help you, it likely will. It just wasn't for me.
Loved it
A short but fantastic compassionate book with lots of easy tips to follow. Quick and simple to read. Thank you!
A short but fantastic compassionate book with lots of easy tips to follow. Quick and simple to read. Thank you!
I think it would have been a godsend while I was single and really struggling with cleaning. As it is, I was wishing that it had more to say about what to do when you have a neurotypical partner who's great at cleaning and you want to overcome your own struggles in order to be an equal partner to them. There were a couple of chapters about division of labor and fairness, but now I kind of want a sequel that's more addressed at partnered people, especially people with neurotypical partners.
informative
inspiring
lighthearted
reflective
fast-paced
Wait? I don’t have to feel terrible about not making my bed. SOLD.
fast-paced
My new mantra “anything worth doing is worth doing partway”.