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3.85 AVERAGE
3.85 AVERAGE
I really enjoyed this book. I felt like it covered some great points and made me feel like a good parent. I especially appreciated that it didn't endorse a "one size fits all" method for parenting. Other parenting books I've read have advised to roughhouse with your children or to talk to them positively. I love that this book shows that you need to fill your child's "love tank" in the way that will do it most effectively, even if it isn't one of those two methods.
At the same time, I was a little put off by the union of two different books in one. I was expecting more "love languages" and got a fair amount (2-3 chapters worth) of "this is how you parent, no matter the love language of your child."
Pros
-No "one size fits all" approach to parenting
-There are great ideas on identifying which love language your child has
-Great ideas on how to speak each of the 5 languages to a child.
-Reaffirmed many of my ideas about parenting
-Discussed how to handle and correct your child's anger in a loving way
Cons:
-The book mentioned several times that one of the languages was the strongest, and then another that was stronger or more effective than the others. This seems to be a departure from the original love languages book
-I was a little put off by there being so much parenting advice in the book that wasn't directly related to the love languages. In some chapters, there was just a "wave" to the love languages, and then it wasn't mentioned again.
-The book advises to withhold information about the love languages because it claims that children will take advantage of their parents trying to speak their love language to get gifts or other favors that might not be part of their love language.
At the same time, I was a little put off by the union of two different books in one. I was expecting more "love languages" and got a fair amount (2-3 chapters worth) of "this is how you parent, no matter the love language of your child."
Pros
-No "one size fits all" approach to parenting
-There are great ideas on identifying which love language your child has
-Great ideas on how to speak each of the 5 languages to a child.
-Reaffirmed many of my ideas about parenting
-Discussed how to handle and correct your child's anger in a loving way
Cons:
-The book mentioned several times that one of the languages was the strongest, and then another that was stronger or more effective than the others. This seems to be a departure from the original love languages book
-I was a little put off by there being so much parenting advice in the book that wasn't directly related to the love languages. In some chapters, there was just a "wave" to the love languages, and then it wasn't mentioned again.
-The book advises to withhold information about the love languages because it claims that children will take advantage of their parents trying to speak their love language to get gifts or other favors that might not be part of their love language.
I have to start off by saying this is the first Goodreads giveaway I have won, and I was THRILLED to receive it. When I first read the original 5 Love Languages, I commented how, more than in romantic love, I applied it to my ability to relate to my parents, specifically my father.
I'm not exaggerating when I say that Dr. Chapman's book changed my life. For 25 years I would describe my father as physically present but emotionally distant. I could count on my hands the times I remember sharing a special moment from my childhood with him. What I didn't realize was all my special moments were when he and I would watch a baseball game on tv together, or the one time I remember him getting on the floor to play with me. After reading that first book it dawned on me that my love language was very clearly quality time while my dad's was gifts! I always felt like he was "buying" my affection...but in reality that was how he best expressed his love. "You may truly love your child, but unless she feels it - unless you speak the love language that communicates to her your love - she will not feel loved."
Sadly, around the time I entered college, I wasted three years not speaking to my dad about something, and the road to reconciliation was difficult. Thankfully, a mother who shared my love language and kept my love tank full all those years really helped channel my anger and underlying feelings of resentment towards my dad into a more productive dialogue where I started to forgive him. Finally understanding the love languages was my "aha" moment that really propelled the road to healing my relationship with my dad. Today our relationship is infinitely better than it has ever been...and a large part is due to Dr. Chapman's book.
That's why this book specifically for children makes me so excited. I always felt the love languages applied not only to romantic relationships but to friendships and even work relationships...and the most impactful relationship is that between a parent and child since the home is the basis for a person's development. Without a solid foundation of rich emotional expression, understanding, and management, children will not develop into the healthiest, pro-social adults this world needs them to be.
I like that the central message is that love is the foundation of any relationship. I also like that the authors dedicated time to an area of concern that is often ignored and that is anger. I have been saying for years that anger is as equally valid an emotion as any other, but we are often not taught how to effectively communicate it. It is ok to express anger, it is not ok to do so in a way that hurts another.
Even though my background is clinical psychology and a lot of this wasn't new, (especially after reading the original book), I still learned a lot and ended up highlighting quite a bit. And while I don't plan to have children of my own, the ability to be more self-aware in how I love on my nephews and the children in my life will reverberate for generations to come.
I'm not exaggerating when I say that Dr. Chapman's book changed my life. For 25 years I would describe my father as physically present but emotionally distant. I could count on my hands the times I remember sharing a special moment from my childhood with him. What I didn't realize was all my special moments were when he and I would watch a baseball game on tv together, or the one time I remember him getting on the floor to play with me. After reading that first book it dawned on me that my love language was very clearly quality time while my dad's was gifts! I always felt like he was "buying" my affection...but in reality that was how he best expressed his love. "You may truly love your child, but unless she feels it - unless you speak the love language that communicates to her your love - she will not feel loved."
Sadly, around the time I entered college, I wasted three years not speaking to my dad about something, and the road to reconciliation was difficult. Thankfully, a mother who shared my love language and kept my love tank full all those years really helped channel my anger and underlying feelings of resentment towards my dad into a more productive dialogue where I started to forgive him. Finally understanding the love languages was my "aha" moment that really propelled the road to healing my relationship with my dad. Today our relationship is infinitely better than it has ever been...and a large part is due to Dr. Chapman's book.
That's why this book specifically for children makes me so excited. I always felt the love languages applied not only to romantic relationships but to friendships and even work relationships...and the most impactful relationship is that between a parent and child since the home is the basis for a person's development. Without a solid foundation of rich emotional expression, understanding, and management, children will not develop into the healthiest, pro-social adults this world needs them to be.
I like that the central message is that love is the foundation of any relationship. I also like that the authors dedicated time to an area of concern that is often ignored and that is anger. I have been saying for years that anger is as equally valid an emotion as any other, but we are often not taught how to effectively communicate it. It is ok to express anger, it is not ok to do so in a way that hurts another.
Even though my background is clinical psychology and a lot of this wasn't new, (especially after reading the original book), I still learned a lot and ended up highlighting quite a bit. And while I don't plan to have children of my own, the ability to be more self-aware in how I love on my nephews and the children in my life will reverberate for generations to come.
A decent book with mostly helpful ideas and examples! Took off 2 stars for the EXTREMELY heavy-handed Christianity and simplistic take on divorce, single parent families, and misogyny.
I decided to read this book after reading Chapman's "The Five Love Languages".
I knew that the love languages were going to be the same, but I wanted to see / read it from a child's perspective, as like any parent you want to understand your children, especially emotionally.
If you are looking for a parenting book that will connect you emotionally with your child then this is the book for you. You will learn your child's love triggers. It will help you communicate with your child. I know I've already implement some of the suggestions, and wow what a difference.
Besides focusing on the 5 love languages, Chapman/Ross also discuss passive aggressive behaviour and the anger ladder, and I found this extremely fascinating and interesting as will you.
And even if you have grown children, this is still a fantastic book to read so you can understand your own children but your grandchildren too.
Rate - 8 out of 10
I knew that the love languages were going to be the same, but I wanted to see / read it from a child's perspective, as like any parent you want to understand your children, especially emotionally.
If you are looking for a parenting book that will connect you emotionally with your child then this is the book for you. You will learn your child's love triggers. It will help you communicate with your child. I know I've already implement some of the suggestions, and wow what a difference.
Besides focusing on the 5 love languages, Chapman/Ross also discuss passive aggressive behaviour and the anger ladder, and I found this extremely fascinating and interesting as will you.
And even if you have grown children, this is still a fantastic book to read so you can understand your own children but your grandchildren too.
Rate - 8 out of 10
My mother told me about the give love languages when I first got married and so I have always strived to speak to my husband in his language. Now my 6 yr old son has been having some behavioral problems and I knew it was time to pick up with book and yake a closer look at its philosophy. Now I am resolvd to try to speak more to my son in his love langauge. I am so glad that I found this and took the time to read it!
This was a great book! Loved how it talks about each of the love languages with children in mind. Also gives some good ideas on how to figure out what your child's love language is. For my full review check out...
http://soldierswifecrazylife.com
http://soldierswifecrazylife.com
This book highlights the importance of showing and giving love to our littles. It’s co-written by a therapist, and some of the detailed descriptions were over my head (e.g. the chapter on anger), but I’m glad I read it. I leave this book with practical ways of loving my children, and I’m glad that I can refer back to it as they grow.
This was fine. I'm super familiar with the love languages, so I don't really know what I thought would be different about this book. It was literally the exact same thing, just with examples pertaining to kids and then some thoughts later about how these apply to learning and discipline and so on. It did say that in kids under 5, it is impossible to tell what their love language is, so in some ways major parts of the book didn't apply to me yet since my kids are 3 & 5. It was good food for thought but nothing that will revolutionize my parenting or anything.
I’m glad I took a chance on the this book. Not as lovey-dovey as I thought it would be, considering the title. It’s filled with great insights, techniques, and thoughts to ponder. I especially enjoyed the sections on discipline and anger.