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clumsyknees's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
5.0
To be groomed is to be be loved and handled like a precious, delicate thing.
Graphic: Adult/minor relationship, Rape, Sexual assault, Pedophilia, Child abuse, and Emotional abuse
Moderate: Drug abuse, Alcoholism, and Suicide
amberreadsgood's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.25
Tangentially (concerning the afterword again), I found it really odd that Russell's early readers encouraged her to write from Strane's perspective instead of Vanessa's, given her unlikability and the inability to relate to her; were they suggesting we should relate/want to relate to the predator instead?? That's a troubling thought. I've never read it before, but if you want something like that, may as well read Lolita or any other number of book that I'm sure exists with this perspective. I applaud Russell for unapologetically sticking to Vanessa's perspective for her book.
I'm not sure I can say I really enjoyed this book, given that I didn't like any of the characters, it felt like reading a 17 year long train wreck get worse and worse, and the outcome at the end of it all was disappointing. But honestly, this is what roots the book in uncomfortable reality.
I think the author achieved what she set out to do. It might not have 100% been my cup of tea, but I admire the approach she took. It was different, difficult, and full of uncomfortable feelings in a way I thought felt realistic. Vanessa is complicated, she has a wealth of complex and painful emotions towards everyone in her life including herself, which I think reflects very well how terribly the abuse really affected her. She's not necessarily incomprehensible, she's fucking traumatised, and she's built a narrative around the abuse that she can accept so she can cope with the scale of it.
Special shoutout to Ruby the therapist, doing the hard yards trying to dig Vanessa out of the emotional hellscape she was buried in, and attempting to get her to understand what she experienced. Saving lives out there.
Graphic: Sexual content, Adult/minor relationship, Rape, Emotional abuse, and Pedophilia
Moderate: Alcoholism, Drug use, Gaslighting, Addiction, Drug abuse, and Alcohol
Minor: Suicide
nina_mk's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.75
Graphic: Mental illness, Pedophilia, Child abuse, Misogyny, Sexual harassment, Suicide, Suicide attempt, Rape, Animal death, Sexual violence, Sexual content, Adult/minor relationship, Death, Grief, Sexual assault, and Suicidal thoughts
Moderate: Death of parent, Emotional abuse, Alcohol, Drug abuse, Drug use, Body shaming, Addiction, Gaslighting, Terminal illness, Alcoholism, and Chronic illness
Minor: Classism, Fatphobia, Stalking, Eating disorder, Bullying, and Lesbophobia
sedgewren's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.25
Graphic: Gaslighting, Pedophilia, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Child abuse, Drug use, Emotional abuse, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Adult/minor relationship, Alcoholism, and Rape
Moderate: Death of parent, Drug abuse, Panic attacks/disorders, Sexual content, Stalking, Toxic relationship, and Classism
nineinchnails's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
i would not recommend reading this as a survivor of rape and especially of child sexual abuse, more because of how adamant vanessa is that she was not abused than how graphic the abuse is written. it can be very hard to stomach her constant romanticisation and denial of strane's abuse, despite how obvious it us to us as readers that he manipulated her. 'manipulate' does not feel like anywhere near as strong of a word to portray how he controlled and exploited her.
vanessa is not a 'perfect victim' and she struggles with this well into adulthood; the idea that a woman must be perfectly chaste, perfectly humble, perfectly innocent, and perfectly untouched by the world to be believed or taken seriously as a victim is one that permeates our society to this day. what was she wearing?, she lead him on, she was asking for it, she wanted it. this novel does an incredible job at giving a voice to the many survivors who (unsurprisingly) don't fit that mould and showing a different perspective.
Graphic: Sexual assault, Toxic relationship, Child abuse, Emotional abuse, Rape, Adult/minor relationship, Panic attacks/disorders, Gaslighting, and Pedophilia
Moderate: Physical abuse, Death, Animal cruelty, Death of parent, Addiction, Alcoholism, Drug use, Infidelity, Stalking, Suicidal thoughts, Bullying, Sexual harassment, Classism, Drug abuse, Grief, Body horror, and Abandonment
Minor: Animal death, Body shaming, Mass/school shootings, and Vomit
Grooming, Dissociation, Post traumatic stress disorder, Child sexual abuse, and Student/teacher relationshipshakattxck's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.75
Graphic: Physical abuse, Vomit, Drug abuse, Sexual content, Sexual assault, Violence, Suicide, Adult/minor relationship, Abandonment, Stalking, Mental illness, Alcoholism, Grief, Fatphobia, Emotional abuse, Addiction, Misogyny, Drug use, Sexual violence, Rape, Pedophilia, Sexism, Child abuse, Death of parent, Death, Sexual harassment, and Alcohol
alicia_belcourt's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.75
The concept of the plot alone intrigued me because I have never read anything like this book before, and it quickly continued to intrigue me the more I read. The writing style of this book was beautifully executed in my opinion because I feel that not many authors could so greatly execute a juxtaposition of the mind quite like Kate Elizabeth Russell did. She was constantly building on the idea of the relationship being romantically sought after by the main character, Vanessa. I also really loved reading how she continued to recount the key details that sparked and arose during the abusive relationship. As well as when Vanessa had continued to age and was still in contact with her abuser, I enjoyed the way Kate wrote about how Vanessa felt 'out of her body' because there were times when she described herself walking around or being 'far off' during scenes of the abuse. However there were aspects of the book that made it a bit of a tougher read for me. For example, Vanessa was at times made to be extremely unlikeable, and I mean this in the way that there were times of her recounting the events of abuse where she was constantly in a state of denial, even when presented with substantial 'evidence'. I understood the reasoning for this as I reached the end of the book, but at the moment it was very hard to stay focused in the book when the main character seemed so unlikable.
Graphic: Addiction, Death, Panic attacks/disorders, Rape, Sexual assault, Alcoholism, Death of parent, Cursing, Emotional abuse, Sexual content, Drug use, Sexual harassment, Adult/minor relationship, Child abuse, Drug abuse, Gaslighting, Mental illness, and Physical abuse
peachyykenn's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Graphic: Grief, Emotional abuse, Adult/minor relationship, Suicide, Drug abuse, Mental illness, Addiction, Child abuse, Gaslighting, Alcohol, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Drug use, Pedophilia, Rape, Sexual harassment, and Suicidal thoughts
Minor: Medical content, Cancer, and Bullying
reechiebun's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
4.0
Graphic: Suicide, Gaslighting, Mental illness, Adult/minor relationship, and Emotional abuse
Moderate: Rape, Sexual assault, Drug abuse, Alcoholism, and Sexual content
Minor: Death of parent
as a clear response to lolita this book deals with complicated, layered issues that involve the main character's mental health and her being abused since she's 15 by a trusted teacher. some of the depicted sex scenes are midly graphic and/or statutory rape. there's an instance of a moderately graphic explicit rape scene.reallbee's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
4.0
Graphic: Emotional abuse, Sexual harassment, Sexism, Child abuse, Gaslighting, Pedophilia, Toxic relationship, Rape, Suicide, Adult/minor relationship, Sexual assault, Sexual content, and Sexual violence
Moderate: Violence, Alcoholism, Drug abuse, and Drug use