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lestaslettering's review against another edition
4.0
Twas a difficult book to read and a difficult book to rate because for a subject this personal and painful, it's impossible to be unbiased in rating a book which understands you so well. I had a lot of fears about my future and how I'm going to suck at parenting because I'm barely surviving much less living & even then a lot of my coping mechanisms are incredibly faulty. The author is really understanding of all possible kinds of situations and while subtle ignorance doth have noticeable effects in adulthood I wish she could write a book on Childhood Emotional Abuse too because there's been loads of books about Physical, Sexual Abuse and Psychological and emotional abuse which are sometimes alone and most times accompanying the other abuses are just as damaging, if not more.
I like her approach of showing what is going on and how what did or didn't happen in childhood lead to that and how to fill the tank now, so you know it's not rushing at you to make linear progress right now. One thing I loved about the book is its chapter on SUICIDAL FEELINGS which is pretty important thing that was addressed and in the right way too.
Although one thing I could not observe but which I go through is feeling too much. Dr. Webb talks about how emotional neglect in the developmental years makes it difficult feeling, acknowledging or expressing emotions in the adulthood but what about those of us who were trapped, whose emotions and feelings were shunned but we can't help but be sensitive & the only lesson we were taught when we showed emotions is to shut up but that had a reverse effect on us, that we are completely ruled by emotions which are out of our control and makes us live in a all or nothing mindset. How never learning how to use emotions effectively didn't lead us to turning off the emotions permanently but made us lose the off switch. But then again I wonder if the abuse had anything to do with it.
Webb has written such a beautiful account on CEN in a great way possible that i wish she could write about CEA especially focusing on those situations where a child who is witnessing domestic violence against its mother or father by the other parent and is growing up feeling that perpetually unsafe, guarded manner is facing severe emotional abuse even when the child is not the one being physically abused. That would clarify a lot. Thank you.
I like her approach of showing what is going on and how what did or didn't happen in childhood lead to that and how to fill the tank now, so you know it's not rushing at you to make linear progress right now. One thing I loved about the book is its chapter on SUICIDAL FEELINGS which is pretty important thing that was addressed and in the right way too.
Although one thing I could not observe but which I go through is feeling too much. Dr. Webb talks about how emotional neglect in the developmental years makes it difficult feeling, acknowledging or expressing emotions in the adulthood but what about those of us who were trapped, whose emotions and feelings were shunned but we can't help but be sensitive & the only lesson we were taught when we showed emotions is to shut up but that had a reverse effect on us, that we are completely ruled by emotions which are out of our control and makes us live in a all or nothing mindset. How never learning how to use emotions effectively didn't lead us to turning off the emotions permanently but made us lose the off switch. But then again I wonder if the abuse had anything to do with it.
Webb has written such a beautiful account on CEN in a great way possible that i wish she could write about CEA especially focusing on those situations where a child who is witnessing domestic violence against its mother or father by the other parent and is growing up feeling that perpetually unsafe, guarded manner is facing severe emotional abuse even when the child is not the one being physically abused. That would clarify a lot. Thank you.
jessjohnnson's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
informative
reflective
medium-paced
3.75
sara_h's review against another edition
challenging
hopeful
informative
reflective
sad
fast-paced
5.0
lauraliz914's review against another edition
emotional
informative
medium-paced
4.0
This is such a great treatise on emotional neglect, and I so appreciate Webb’s work to get this incredibly important issue to the forefront of the psychological world. I treat mostly complex trauma in my private practice as a therapist, and the detrimental role of emotional neglect in people’s lives runs deep. This book explains how and why, and I’m grateful it exists.
My only issue with the book is Webb’s CBT approach to healing. In my experience, we don’t solve nervous system problems with prefrontal cortex solutions. Nonetheless, I will recommend this to clients because the education is so good.