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black_matilda's review
challenging
dark
emotional
informative
reflective
sad
tense
medium-paced
Content Warnings
Graphic: Sexual assault, Violence, Murder, Death, Cannibalism, Alcoholism, Sexual violence, and Pedophilia
tarainez's review against another edition
dark
sad
fast-paced
4.0
This was an easy, quick read. Lionel said many times in the book that he is an analyst and not overly emotional, and I feel like that came through in the writing. It felt a little clinical at times and a little detached. Interesting read, though.
sevaspeto's review
4.0
I'm torn between rating this a 3 or a 5 for wholly different, if not subjective, reasons. Admittedly, the bulk of the draw for me was the true crime element, and the morbid curiosity, and the voyeuristic window into the crimes themselves and into the mind of Jeff(rey) -- I can't stress this enough, *that is not what this book is*. As a fellow ghoul, I'm not casting aspersions on folks that are seeking that out; nor am I saying that this was a "bad" book by any stretch -- I just went into it with the wrong expectations. And for that reason, I found the first half of the book sort of difficult to get through -- and that's entirely on me.
So much of the first half of the book focuses on Lionel's recollection of Jeff growing up and seemingly banal minutiae, Lionel's emotional detachment and workaholism -- it just felt needlessly mundane. BUT, in the final third of the book, Lionel paints the picture a little clearer -- although, he'd already been drawing parallels over the first half, the emotional detachment and obsessive need for order and control that Jeff has (and effectively drove him to kill) Lionel recognizes as being present in himself -- he realizes how much of Jeff's impulses and thought patterns are present in himself (albeit in a less extreme form) and wonders how much of Jeff's mania and psychosis was ultimately passed down from him -- either genetically and environmentally. And then further wonders how far apart psychologically they really are.
As a fellow highly analytical dude that's capable of compartmentalizing and detaching, I found that last third *incredibly* fascinating -- calling someone "evil" or a "monster" is reductive and not terribly insightful. Being able to critically assess the factors that may have led to their descent -- even when that may point back at you --*is*. And being able to assess your own emotions as objectively and analytically as Lionel does is like a superpower, and it's simultaneously clear that he abhors the strings of his son but still embodies an incredible love for him -- it's something that he wrestles with throughout the entire book and I'm sure over the last 30 years. Definitely recommended -- this is expertly well-written =0)
So much of the first half of the book focuses on Lionel's recollection of Jeff growing up and seemingly banal minutiae, Lionel's emotional detachment and workaholism -- it just felt needlessly mundane. BUT, in the final third of the book, Lionel paints the picture a little clearer -- although, he'd already been drawing parallels over the first half, the emotional detachment and obsessive need for order and control that Jeff has (and effectively drove him to kill) Lionel recognizes as being present in himself -- he realizes how much of Jeff's impulses and thought patterns are present in himself (albeit in a less extreme form) and wonders how much of Jeff's mania and psychosis was ultimately passed down from him -- either genetically and environmentally. And then further wonders how far apart psychologically they really are.
As a fellow highly analytical dude that's capable of compartmentalizing and detaching, I found that last third *incredibly* fascinating -- calling someone "evil" or a "monster" is reductive and not terribly insightful. Being able to critically assess the factors that may have led to their descent -- even when that may point back at you --*is*. And being able to assess your own emotions as objectively and analytically as Lionel does is like a superpower, and it's simultaneously clear that he abhors the strings of his son but still embodies an incredible love for him -- it's something that he wrestles with throughout the entire book and I'm sure over the last 30 years. Definitely recommended -- this is expertly well-written =0)
rain96's review
4.0
This is a really detailed and unique perspective on Jeffrey, and I would say this is a "must-read" for anyone interested in the history of the case. It did come off as a bit defensive, but it still seemed like an authentic recount of Lionel and Jeffrey's relationship and what went down. Lionel keeps an apologetic and mostly grounded tone throughout most of it, though does tend to lend a lot of blame to Jeff's mother(but, hey? maybe rightfully so?). Ultimately, he provides a lot of info, and it should be kept in mind this is entirely his take on what happened.
lolanicole's review
5.0
If you are picking up this book to get lurid details of the Jeffrey Dahmer murders, look elsewhere.
I knew when I picked up this book, written by Dahmer's father, that it was written as a way for him to try to understand how his son ended up a monster. The reader takes the journey with Lionel Dahmer, going through Jeffrey Dahmer's life from childhood to adulthood while trying to pick up on any clues that could have let this family, especially this father, realize who this man really was.
This is a story of a father's pain for a son he realizes was never there. It's written with much emotion - confusion, sadness, despair, lots of trying to answer the question why.
Of course, as a society, we mourn the dead victims, as we should, but we tend to forget that the family of the murderer/serial killer, is as much a victim in all this. We tend to judge his/her family harshly and point fingers. We need a reason, someone to blame, for the atrocities. But sometimes we don't get the answers. I'm not sure Lionel Dahmer ever really did.
After reading this book, my heart broke for Jeffrey Dahmer's family. I hope that they were able to find some kind of peace after everything.
I knew when I picked up this book, written by Dahmer's father, that it was written as a way for him to try to understand how his son ended up a monster. The reader takes the journey with Lionel Dahmer, going through Jeffrey Dahmer's life from childhood to adulthood while trying to pick up on any clues that could have let this family, especially this father, realize who this man really was.
This is a story of a father's pain for a son he realizes was never there. It's written with much emotion - confusion, sadness, despair, lots of trying to answer the question why.
Of course, as a society, we mourn the dead victims, as we should, but we tend to forget that the family of the murderer/serial killer, is as much a victim in all this. We tend to judge his/her family harshly and point fingers. We need a reason, someone to blame, for the atrocities. But sometimes we don't get the answers. I'm not sure Lionel Dahmer ever really did.
After reading this book, my heart broke for Jeffrey Dahmer's family. I hope that they were able to find some kind of peace after everything.
minni_bar's review
I’m not going to rate this, but I liked the way it was written and to find out, from another perspective, who Jeffrey Dahmer was.