Reviews tagging 'Physical abuse'

Stay Gold by Tobly McSmith

29 reviews

michaelion's review against another edition

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dark emotional funny hopeful informative inspiring tense medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? No
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.5

My ex bought me this for our one month anniversary and I finally read it two years later hoping the book would be bad so I could give it away but it was so good! So cue so sweet. I shall be keeping it.

I was so sure that The Outsiders wasn't canon in this world and then she mentioned it! It's nitpicky but naming yourself after Ponyboy is much cooler than just naming yourself after an animal randomly. That boy got to senior year and didn't read The Outsiders?! It's so gay he would've loved it.

A great book for explaining what a trans person is to kids / teens. It has a perfect mixture of people familiar with the world and explaining to someone who knows nothing. Great writing. I laughed a plenty.

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readingwithkaitlyn's review against another edition

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challenging fast-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.0


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loiseigenraam's review against another edition

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dark emotional funny informative inspiring sad medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

I really appreciate this book for the story it tells, but it being a YA story I'm just 'too old' to really appreciate the teenage drama that is going on in the book. Things like the prank war between the football team and the cheerleading squad or the 'jokes' Georgia made really had me rolling my eyes. 
 
Besides that, I did enjoy the book and the story. I found it very interesting, and heart wrenching, to see the world through a transgender boy's eyes. I really liked Pony as a character too. Lets just not talk about his name though... I also sobbed my eyes out ofc. I agree with all the reviews saying this book should come with trigger warnings. Please look those up if you have any triggers before you read this book. 
 
I definitely recommend this book for the transgender POV and learning more about that. And if you're a younger reader, you might also enjoy the whole story around that too. 
 
Something that annoyed me very much was Pony's friend Max. I understand him wanting Pony to be out and proud and wanting him to be an advocate. But as someone who’s gone through the same process and is also a receiver of transphobia and harassment, you’d think he’d have more of an understanding towards Pony’s hesitation to be out and would kindly nudge him in the right direction while respecting his choices and his personal timeline, instead of actually putting an ultimatum on their friendship.

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maxmaxmax's review against another edition

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emotional hopeful informative inspiring sad medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Plot
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.25


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journey2's review against another edition

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  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? It's complicated
  • Loveable characters? No
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
Sometimes I need to take my own advice. If you are not loving a book...it's okay to quit it. And you probably should. 
 But I wanted to see how it ended. 

~☆~ minor spoilers~☆~ 

Stay Gold was not a good read for me. I found this book frustrating. The characters annoyed me and everyone seemed extremely superficial. 

Pony is relentless about the "friend zone" thing with Georgia. She continues to say no to his advances and he continues to pursue. Yes, she likes him, but she has clearly said no and he will not give up and keeps asking for more; including love bombing her with a grand gesture, until he can eventually win her over. 

Our main love interest, Georgia, is so obsessed with her image and social standing right til nearly the end and her change of heart is supposed to be endearing, but by the time we got there I was just so tired of how fake she was. 

I know that in high school everybody's figuring out who they are and who they want to be, but absolutely every character was so fake and two dimensional. In the end, superficial apologies and excuses like "it's just locker room talk" etc seem to 'fix' every off-colour comment or remark. Pony's dad was absolutely horrible to him throughout the entire book and his mom was kind of just complacent and didn't fight for him. A couple sentences at the very end of the book are supposed to redeem him but they just felt forced. Even though lots of things ended up being happy or at least happier, I found this book extremely problematic, frustrating and annoying and I do not recommend it. 

I'm curious as to what the purpose of the storyline about Pony's job served. It didn't really go anywhere except to allow Pony to be nosy and intrusive into somebody else's business and then he got to have a warm fuzzy feeling afterwards. On that note, Pony continued to stick his nose into business that is not his own and it was very annoying. There was a time when Pony and Georgia stuck their noses into something so personal that I actually took time away from the book because I was  exasperated. He was rewarded for it eventually, but it was annoying to read. 

This book was 100% not for me and was just completely filled with red flags.
 I could go on, but I won't! 

Also it's list of trigger warnings is a mile long

 

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short_circuit's review against another edition

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emotional funny fast-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? No
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? No

2.0

hey just a heads up for future readers, pony’s deadname is dropped on page 344 and 345 (this edition is paperback, quill tree books, ISBN ending in 43187) for anybody who wants to avoid those two pages!

it’s hinted at a couple times earlier throughout the book, but those pages are the only instances where the full name is mentioned.

for people wanting to avoid it, skip georgia’s section when she talks to pony’s dad in the car.

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queerloras's review against another edition

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challenging emotional hopeful inspiring medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? No
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.75


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that_bookworm_guy's review against another edition

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dark emotional medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? No
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

3.0

This is a hard book to review because right up until the ends, I really didn't like the characters. I get the point being made, I do. Some of the trans information and statistics were well done and a good addition. 

First of all, I defo want to put here that I am a trans man. So this is my view as just 1 trans person.

First of all, the romance. I'm defo not great at reading romance, but I definitely didn't find it cute. This could just be me, I'm really aware that romance just isn't my thing. But it felt so focused. I hated, hated how Pony chased Georgia after she said she didn't want to date him. He was counting down the days it had been since they kissed and was purposely making situations hoping for a kiss. And then after a big love show, she turned him down because he is trans and she was worried about her image. I know this is meant to be a point of growth for the characters as she learns that it doesn't matter but yeah, I didn't like this. 

Max, a trans friend, keeps putting pressure on Pony to be out and proud as a trans man when he keeps repeating that he wants to live stealth after what happened before. Then threatens that if he isn't out he will end the friendship. Emotional blackmail. Nope. As a trans person, I don't know a single trans person who would do this to another trans person. He does apologise later, but only after Pony comes out and gets attacked. Max is an incredibly shitty person and apologising is the very least, but yeah, I defo wouldn't trust or forgive someone for doing that. This is such a harmful situation, Pony should have 100% cut Max out of his life at the first sign of emotional manipulation. I really hope trans youths know that they don't ever have to come out like this. I live stealth in my life at work and I would 100% cut out a friend who expected me to share things online such as Facebook where it could risk outing me. Because respect is the least I ask for. Let alone from another trans person. 

The book also got very dark very suddenly at the end. I understand it happens in life. That trans people get assaulted, and that trans people are at a higher risk of suicide. But I just don't think this was handled well at all. It was almost sudden with no warning. 

If you're expecting a cute romance with some hard hitting bits, then it's worth looking into the TWs. Because this gets incredibly dark. 

There is also theme throughout where Georgia is trying to find out Pony's deadname. It's revealed in the end, and although Georgia says that she didn't really need to know what it was and it doesn't matter, it would have been a much nicer thing if the name was never revealed to the reader. If it truly doesn't matter, then don't mention it. I understand the point that was trying to be made, but it would have made a bigger point to not make a huge point of it. The first 2 letters are revealed part way through the book and I feel like it almost leads the reader to want to figure out his deadname. 

I've rated this 2.5/3* simply because there were some good points in this book and I was semi enjoying the train wreck of the romance thinking that it was just me not enjoying romance, but there are definitely some huge red flags with the romance.

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ranjanireviewsreads's review against another edition

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1.0

Okay, let's address this hot fucking mess of a book, one point at a time. With headings and everything!!

Please, please check the trigger warnings below. This book is not what it seems like. It is better to be spoiled for the story than be caught completely off-guard and triggered when the scene literally creeps up on you.

Additionally, I'd like to say that while I don't identify as trans, I am genderqueer. I experience dysphoria on a daily basis and face casual transphobia and homophobia as well. Please read reviews from more transgender readers; they have very valid criticisms about this book.

- A Real Bad Romance: because, let's be honest, Georgia has as much personality as a sopping wet sheet of paper and that personality is... not good. Not only does Pony and Georgia's "romance" start way too early with absolutely no basis (their eyes meet once and that's a sign?), Georgia very obviously misgenders and is transphobic towards Pony multiple times. The attraction between them makes no sense because they knew as much about each other as I knew about them - absolutely nothing substantial.

- A Writing Class?
Writing teenagers is hard. Ways of conversing change wildly between friends, circumstances, and cliques.  Some authors can pull it off better but McSmith is not one of them.
For the first 1/3 of the book, I am hit with completely random info-dumps about Georgia's past and Pony's coming-out story. They are relevant to the story but there is a way to write them and this is not it.

- All the Internalised Transphobia
- Plus the Internalised Homophobia!
I understand that the internal journey of coming to terms with your identity and with the way the world will ultimately treat you is very, very important. However, trans kids are surrounded by stories like this all day, every day in real life. I believe we need more stories of trans acceptance and trans joy, stories that show another side of being trans, stories that show hope. This story is not unnecessary but it IS misleading. It is not a cute, fluffy romance. It is ultimately a coming-out story with very extreme and violent consequences (check trigger warnings!!!!).

As a result, Pony deals with a lot (and I really do mean a lot) of internalised transphobia. I will be writing more details in the content warnings section, but please be prepared going in that Pony's and Georgia's internal monologues can be very triggering. Pony also uses (one) slur (that I can remember) near the beginning, to "fit in" with his outrageously homophobic and transphobic "manly" friends.

- Forced to Come Out? Jail.
Let's talk about Pony's friend Max and the incredibly harmful message the author spreads, even though it may be unintentional. I will say it as many times as I need to: NO ONE NEEDS TO BE OUT TO BE VALID. YOU DO NOT OWE ANYONE AN EXPLANATION OF YOUR IDENTITY. YOU CAN LIE AS MUCH AS YOU WANT IF IT KEEPS YOU SAFE!!!!!

And that is the gist of the matter, isn't it? Pony was very well aware that being trans in a conservative town, among people he heard being transphobic all day will not be safe for him and YET his BEST FRIEND Max only admitted to understanding Pony's perspective after
Pony was literally assaulted and had to be hospitalised
. It felt like a shallow apology at best and really showed the flaws in the overly-marketed and very young queer community of contemporary times.

Max insisted that Pony should be out and "proud" because a small, conservative high school like Pony's needed a transgender voice while Max himself was out at a "liberal" school where "being gay/trans was normal" (Pony's words; can't remember the exact phrasing). I'm not sure what message the author is trying to give, but I do not like this part of it. Not at all.

- Not the Homophobic + Transphobic Friends
That suddenly become not homophobic and transphobic once it becomes cool to be cool with it? But also I generally do not like how the book wraps up so neatly in the last few minutes, with Max's apology, Georgia's everything-phobic cheerleading team coming around, Pony's fathers total 180; the stakes were so high for the entire book. It was obvious the author just wanted to drop everything to get a cookie cutter "the queer/trans kid gets accepted by everyone and is so brave and finds protection" and god knows what else.

- Not the H*rry P*ttr reference *cries*. I counted one. I don't want to know if I missed any more.

TL;DR: A potentially harmful book, given it's target audience with it's internalised transphobia, transphobic friend circle, and it's message of needing to come out to be true to yourself.

I highly DO NOT recommend this book to anyone.

Instead, I would suggest reading:

Cemetery Boys by Aiden Thomas for a similar set up -- trans MC; unaccepting family; some romance; a quest to prove oneself; fantasy 

The Sunbearer Trials by Aiden Thomas -- for a queernorm world and some trans joy; no romance; fantasy

I Wish You All the Best by Mason Deaver

Felix Ever After by Kacen Callender

Lark and Kasim Start A Revolution by Kacen Callender

Gender Queer by Maia Kobabe

When The Moon was Ours by Anna-Marie McLemore

Fierce Femmes and Notorious Liars 

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the13thmagdalena's review against another edition

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emotional hopeful reflective medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

3.75


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