Reviews with content warning for Toxic relationship - Olga Dies Dreaming

Reviews tagging 'Toxic relationship'

Olga Dies Dreaming by Xochitl Gonzalez

47 reviews

bookswithmybulldog's review

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dark emotional slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.0

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books_and_mags's review

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challenging emotional reflective sad medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus? No

5.0

I loved this book. That said, it’s full of generational trauma, so keep that in mind when you read it. The characters are all so lovable, and they all subvert the system in their own way. I finished half of it in one sitting because it was so engrossing.

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bookdragon217's review

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challenging dark emotional inspiring reflective sad tense fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? No
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.75

"His Papi had always told him that the United States made Puerto Rico's handcuffs, but it was other Puerto Ricans who helped put them on."

Papi wasn't lying and Papi was probably the wisest character in the entire book. I wanted more of Papi, period.

I've been holding off on reading Olga Dies Dreaming because I wanted my own experience with it, raw and untainted. The marketing on this one is misleading. The description of the show is more accurate in that it's about two siblings living in gentrified Brooklyn.

The beginning introduced me to lots of characters, mostly unlikable which I don't ever mind as long as it's leading somewhere. The first half felt like the soup was brewing but I didn't need the sazon, adobo, sofrito and the achiote at the same time. I don't fault the author for this but the editor dropped the ball because it felt a little too messy. However, Xochitl's ability to portray Brooklyn as its own character was brilliant. That was the journey that felt the most real to me. The character of Blanca was one of my favorites because she was the most developed and spoke so honestly about being Puerto Rican, expectations of women and motherhood and rips the bandaid off to uncover the true status of Puerto Rico. The Puerto Rican history and social commentary sprinkled throughout the pages is what gave this book its' unique flavor and why it is such a necessary read at this time.

The second half of the book completely boiled over and shifts the focus to a dark plot about Hurricane Maria, neocolonialism, revolution, corporate greed and violence in various forms. I felt triggered and disoriented because it was not a smooth transition but then again the U.S. violently occupied Puerto Rico, refuses to leave and continues to commit all types of genocide on the people of the island. To see the POV of the white rich people that continue to steal our land and livelihood is one that you often don't see in books today. Bravo to Xochitl for being bold in that choice.

Although, this book felt like two different books at the same time I appreciated what it had to say about motherhood, colonialism, liberation and gentrification.

To be clear, I did not hate this book. I think it is timely and necessary and speaks boldly about Puerto Rican history that has completely either been erased or whitewashed. I do think it offers much value. However, I would be remiss if I did not point out where this book had moments of insensitivity and got cringey.

This novel takes place in contemporary NY and the language choices around substance use, HIV awareness and sexual assault did not sit right with me because the instances added to more stigma rather than provide insight and empathy. It read like language that has been historically been used by elite Whites especially, to further marginalize certain groups and dehumanize them. Papi was repeatedly called a "junkie" or "crackhead" and dehumanized with no exploration into his backstop. His identity was that of having AIDS and being a drug user. The use of the word "AIDS" in such a violent way by several characters was off putting especially in the ways it was being weaponzied by the characters in 2017 setting. I see what the intent was but because the issues stayed surface level nothing new new was added to the narratives about substance use and HIV. In fact, it didn't even build empathy for the character who was most affected. Papi definitely didn't deserve that treatment as well. Therr is also a sexual assault that was also hard to read because of the choices that were made. It felt like the abuser got to walk away without repercussions and made it feel like dramatic effect only.

After all is said and done, Olga Dies Dreaming is effective in shedding light on the history of Puerto Rico and U.S. relations. It makes you reflect on how mainland Puerto Ricans can be complicit and how important it is for Puerto Ricans on the island be the ones who determine their fate and future. I commend Xochitl for such an undertaking and I will definitely be reading her future books. My final thoughts on this one are to read the book, heed the trigger warnings and don't be afraid to have the critical.conversations that this one will spark. Thanks to @flatironbooks for the gifted book.

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redwrapped's review

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emotional funny reflective tense medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

This is one of the books that I can see being touted as a strong contender for awards honoring the American experience and for best debut novel, and rightfully so, due to the breadth of unflinching honesty woven throughout Olga Dies Dreaming.

Olga Acevedo is an American woman facing the internal struggle that so many feel, to be seen as she sees herself, yet Olga isn't necessarily sure of who she is or to whom her loyalty is strongest. She has lived her entire life in Brooklyn and feels American, but her family hails from Puerto Rico. She feels alienated by the rich, white WASP clientele she serves as an elite wedding planner, and is crucially separated by distance and emotional warmth toward her mother.

Her mother, Blanca, left Olga, her brother Prieto, and their father behind in Brooklyn to try to embolden and free Puerto Rico from the United States through revolutionary action, becoming a fugitive for terroristic ties and disappearing entirely except for barbed, critical letters sent to her family members, guiding them what to do. Blanca's dedication to the cause is stronger than to her children or her marriage.

The theme circulates around love and all the complexities of it: love for your country, love for family, love for life, and love for someone new. Despite how heavy and political it can be, the tone is never cynical, but made up of hope and resilience, and that adds a tender sort of strength to each of the love stories in here.

While reading this, I was compelled to read about the history of Puerto Rican resistance and mainland America's lack of aid or respect toward the archipelago. My viewpoint toward statehood or the United States relinquishing control over Puerto Rico has been altered, due to the compelling argument in this book and for the fact it drove me to independently research the toll and fundamental inadequacies that Puerto Rico faces due to its indeterminate status as a territory and not as a state with the level of protective measures for emergency aid as another state would have, usage of natural resources for electricity, etc.

Thanks to Flatiron Books and Netgalley for this ARC in exchange for an honest review.

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soundlysmitten's review

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challenging emotional hopeful informative inspiring reflective medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

I loved this story to bits. Olga is the best heroine I could imagine following in this time. She is unapologetically herself and her relationship with her family—especially how she was with her abuelita/is with her brother Prieto—is heartwarming in the realest way. Also, the romance she has had me sighing at times without ever being over the top. And I was glad for the emphasis on each person becoming self motivated to heal their own past wounds. That it’s not another false “I’ve been walking around with loads of issues but now that I’ve found you (and you’re so wonderful) I’m all better” narrative. But most impressively, in my opinion, Olga inspires essential discussions around family and identity while also broaching a number of issues which have long gone unacknowledged by those with the kind of privilege which allows for the closing of their hearts and eyes.

Take the impact of gentrification, as examined in this story. It can be overwhelming and upsetting to think about, but it’s a necessary conversation. Local people shouldn’t be the only ones who care about local lives. As the book describes happening in Puerto Rico, foreigners with money are constantly displacing locals all over the place by pricing them out of land they have no right to. And it seems whack for that to not even register as wrong to some people. You know, I understand the urge to withdraw into the issues of your own community only. Sometimes that alone can feel like too much. But I think it’s important to recognize a continual need to broaden your awareness of what others are up against, and I so appreciate this novel as a lens through which to do that. Growing up, I was taught to be outraged over the illegal overthrow and annexation of my home. But I have never stopped to think about how things differ for Puerto Rico and other places the U.S. has deemed territories, but not states. In referencing a myriad of things the U.S. has done to/failed to do for Puerto Rico, this book has sparked in me a drive to pay better attention and find greater ways to stand in solidarity.

For those who have already read the story, the only thing I felt was lacking is consequences for Dick. But it doesn't often play out that way, does it?

Thank you Xóchitl González & Flatiron Books for providing me an ARC in exchange for my honest review.

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armontheroad's review

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challenging dark emotional reflective sad medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

I was given an ARC through NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

CWs: Suicide, homophobia, gentrification, racism, transphobic language, child abandonment, sexual harassment, a parent with drug addiction, AIDs, a parent with Alzheimer’s, fatphobia, hurricane Maria, toxic/manipulative relationship, domestic abuse, rape, bombing, etc.

Overall: I am very grateful to NetGalley for providing me with this brilliantly done audiobook. The narration was excellently done! Xochitl Gonzalez created such realistic characters, I had to remind myself this was in fact fiction. Going into this, I assumed it was Young Adult but I am so glad that this is Adult! Such great discussions: morals, politics, sexuality, bodily autonomy, dealing with childhood trauma from your past, etc. A lot of these characters, their thoughts, their mannerisms, remind me so deeply of people in my own Latine family/our community. Gonzalez shows how much we deal with from non-Latine people, but also, from people within our own community. There are lots of conversations about how Latine people can say we love our family but are not accepting of them being queer/different than their expectations of us.

Queer rep: I do wish that the queer rep was handled a bit differently. There’s not one queer person in this book that is just content with their queerness. The opening of the book is a queer man killing himself because he tests positive for HIV. He was in an open relationship with his partner who reacts…. Strangely to his death. It rubbed me the wrong way as a queer man. We follow two siblings whose father dies from AIDs. Then the brother also gets scared he has HIV for being a closeted gay man and it’s an entire plotline. The queer rep was just… not my favorite. Also, you can see Gonzalez trying hard to be inclusive and uplighting of queer people. Trans people are mentioned, once very briefly, HOWEVER, the language in this book is (I believe unintentionally) very transphobic. You cannot say you stand with trans people and then call it “women’s reproductive health” or call men “males”. Just be mindful if you’re trying to have conversations about supporting queer people from all walks of life. As a Latine trans reader, there were tons of times where I was highly uncomfortable reading what Gonzalez had written because it was transphobic rhetoric. I am positive that was not her intention, but that is how it, unfortunately, came across.

Final thoughts: Not going to lie, about halfway through I contemplated DNFing this audiobook. Now that I have actually gone back and listened to the entire novel, I’m so glad I didn’t DNF. This novel has the same vibes as DETRANSITION, BABY with its handling of really hard topics. Just like my thoughts of DETRANSITION, BABY, I believe OLGA DIES DREAMING is a hard read but completely worth it. This is not a fun, lighthearted Latine book to clap yourself on the back for reading diversely. This delves deeply into our community, and honestly, deeply into the world as a whole. I would highly recommend, just keep the Content Warnings in mind before reading!!

Content Warnings

amandas_bookshelf's review against another edition

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emotional funny reflective medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? No
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.25

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