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staplerscissors's review against another edition
4.0
A memoir that exposes overt and covert moments of misogyny (as something insidious, self-destructive, colonial, and normalized) in masculinity and femininity. This is explored while detailing her own instances of perpetuating and challenging misogynistic actions before and after coming out as a trans woman. This memoir really asks you to be accountable for your actions.
stephmcoakley's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
informative
reflective
slow-paced
4.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Body shaming, Cursing, Alcohol, Biphobia, Bullying, Death, Emotional abuse, Deadnaming, Homophobia, Infidelity, Mental illness, Suicidal thoughts, Islamophobia, Racism, Transphobia, Panic attacks/disorders, Racial slurs, Self harm, Misogyny, Dysphoria, and Body horror
thepaperbackplanner's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
informative
reflective
fast-paced
4.0
This was a quick but informative and moving read. Author Vivek Shraya uses her personal experiences to illustrate the ways that societal structures of masculinity have affected her throughout her life. She ties memories from her past into current experiences to showcase the ways that upholding “traditional masculinity” holds back people of any gender. Something I loved about this book was how Shraya used second-person pronouns to refer to the people who did her harm when telling her story. There’s something very challenging about reading phrases like “you laughed at me,” “you spit on me,” and “you called me a slur.” Maybe we as readers weren’t the actual people from this story… but what *have* we done, intentionally or unintentionally, to harm another person? This writing style forces that confrontation in the reader. The only reason I didn’t give this a five-star rating is that the directness of the writing style didn’t always work well for me. But overall, “I’m Afraid of Men” led to an excellent book club discussion, and I would heartily recommend it to anyone looking to read about a transgender person’s experience, challenge their concepts of masculinity and “good” vs. “bad” men, and be challenged to approach the way they think about their own gender.
shxqira's review against another edition
4.75
important points were made in this book. i recommend it to everyone plus its a very fast read!
ceebee86's review against another edition
emotional
reflective
slow-paced
4.25
A memoir of a very relatable, very real, and yet very different experience.
I enjoyed the introspection about the past male lover the most. About taking the “good man” down from the pedestal and humanizing him.
I enjoyed the introspection about the past male lover the most. About taking the “good man” down from the pedestal and humanizing him.
thepetitepunk's review against another edition
Short, but insightful and vulnerable. Usually when I read LGBTQ+ memoirs, I read them to learn about an individual’s personal experience. I was surprised that Vivek Shraya offered some new perspectives on gender and sexuality that I had not considered before. Very well done.