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3.8 AVERAGE
3.8 AVERAGE
challenging
reflective
medium-paced
“Today, love is being positivized into sexuality, and, by the same token, subjected to a commandment to perform. Sex means achievement and performance. And sexiness represents capital to be increased. The body—with its display value—has become a commodity. At the same time, the Other is being sexualized into an object for procuring arousal. When otherness is stripped from the Other, one cannot love—one can only consume" (12).
An interesting cursory exploration of "eros," and what it means to encounter the Other. More so, a survey of compelling thoughts and works by other sociological/philosophical thinkers.
An interesting cursory exploration of "eros," and what it means to encounter the Other. More so, a survey of compelling thoughts and works by other sociological/philosophical thinkers.
Den här boken är den enda som förstår mig!!!!!!! !!! För många män dock. Och jag ryggar vid any mention av surrealisterna. Men ändå en 5a för den här är mkt viktig för mig!!
I enjoyed this a lot, and found it relevant to a few key relationships in my own life. This book's 'narration' is a tension between the authentic expression of Eros and modern society. For Han, modern capitalist society imbues us with a certain narcissistic individualism which prevents us from encountering the Other in their otherness. The Other is encountered merely as an 'adumbration' of the Self; "Meaning can only exist for the narcissistic self only when it somehow catches sight of itself". It was interesting to read further into Han's conception of 'achievement-subject', that is, the subject who exploits himself willingly in order to 'achieve' and 'produce' in society. We can characterize the 'achievement-subject' as ready to take up entrepreneurial projects--and this endeavor is embedded into the prevailing ideology of modern life. A certain performativity is essential here, for the self-exploitative 'achievement-subject' is willing to take on projects and strive to achieve under the pretense of 'being able to'. But the erotic relationship lies outside of this 'being able to'. Modern life has falsely characterized love as some form of performance (that the Other must perform or provide for me, or that I must perform for the other, etc.). Rather, the imposition of performativity is precisely what spoils the erotic tinge of relationships. The reduction of love to mere sex--this implies a certain performative dimension, as it reduces Eros to sensuality and enjoyment. Han says that true love, true Eros, only awakens in that the Other is given, yet also concealed. The Other is revealed in their otherness.
Han will go on to characterize Eros, love relations, in this privative fashion, a kind of absence of full disclosure. Social media, pornography, and rapid search engines all have the potential to demystify the Other. We can also consider online presence, continual texting, constant communication, as a kind of demystification whereby the Other is always around, never missing, never truly desired. Is our modern situation, characterized by continual presence of the Other, something that has spoiled the desire for the Other? Or has it opened up new ways of approaching the Other? Is it true that such devices of communication have removed the 'otherness'? Han certainly thinks so, but he hasn't addressed the fact that virtual space is still privative in its own way. To his point, virtual space, dating apps in particular, have opened up endless possibilities. The subject is inclined to 'sell himself', to engage in a new kind of 'self-exploitation', and he 'weights his options' of his next love affair based on certain options and factors, etc. For Han, one cannot develop a 'checklist' of ideal traits or offerings that a potential lover should have. Dating apps that gamify sexual gratification are quite far from love, and even have a tinge of narcissistic conquering of the Other, whereby the Other is hardly encountered in their otherness, as a subject of their own, but rather as a mere object of conquest.
Overall, I think this book is neat. I think it opens up a new way of thinking about love relationships and how the contingencies of modern life inform our self-understanding. Han understands true Eros in terms of essential difference and privative encounter; this is a quite radical view considering that many cliches claim that love is built upon similarities between two people. My opinion tends lightly towards Han, for his notions of privation and deferral most definitely constitute the erotic encounter. Still, it is observable that many lasting relationships are built on certain similarities as well. Thus, I would ask Han: what precisely do we mean when we say 'otherness'? How far can we take 'otherness', for surely we must guard against the superficiality of 'exoticizing' the Other, and of also discounting the Other altogether on account of this 'otherness'. If such bounds exist, we should address them.
Han will go on to characterize Eros, love relations, in this privative fashion, a kind of absence of full disclosure. Social media, pornography, and rapid search engines all have the potential to demystify the Other. We can also consider online presence, continual texting, constant communication, as a kind of demystification whereby the Other is always around, never missing, never truly desired. Is our modern situation, characterized by continual presence of the Other, something that has spoiled the desire for the Other? Or has it opened up new ways of approaching the Other? Is it true that such devices of communication have removed the 'otherness'? Han certainly thinks so, but he hasn't addressed the fact that virtual space is still privative in its own way. To his point, virtual space, dating apps in particular, have opened up endless possibilities. The subject is inclined to 'sell himself', to engage in a new kind of 'self-exploitation', and he 'weights his options' of his next love affair based on certain options and factors, etc. For Han, one cannot develop a 'checklist' of ideal traits or offerings that a potential lover should have. Dating apps that gamify sexual gratification are quite far from love, and even have a tinge of narcissistic conquering of the Other, whereby the Other is hardly encountered in their otherness, as a subject of their own, but rather as a mere object of conquest.
Overall, I think this book is neat. I think it opens up a new way of thinking about love relationships and how the contingencies of modern life inform our self-understanding. Han understands true Eros in terms of essential difference and privative encounter; this is a quite radical view considering that many cliches claim that love is built upon similarities between two people. My opinion tends lightly towards Han, for his notions of privation and deferral most definitely constitute the erotic encounter. Still, it is observable that many lasting relationships are built on certain similarities as well. Thus, I would ask Han: what precisely do we mean when we say 'otherness'? How far can we take 'otherness', for surely we must guard against the superficiality of 'exoticizing' the Other, and of also discounting the Other altogether on account of this 'otherness'. If such bounds exist, we should address them.
inspiring
reflective
fast-paced
informative
inspiring
reflective
fast-paced
challenging
medium-paced
this was awesome. short book but says what it needed to say.. in a very accessible way. some may think it was negative.. but after reading it I felt happy, excited, like I knew a little secret that nobody else knew. but everyone else should know it! i believe in love.
informative
reflective
fast-paced
reflective
medium-paced