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4.1 AVERAGE
4.1 AVERAGE
"Look, I'm not this upset because I have to do one stupid chore or babysit my brother for a few hours after school... things have gotten to the point where everything is bad all the time, so one little thing pushes me right over. Sometimes I wish I had split lips or bruises to show the school counselor. [sic] I'm trapped, suffocating. Living in this house is like the time I was in my cousin;s pool and a big raft everyone was playing on covered me. I was stuck underwater with it just over my head and for a few seconds I was certain I was going to drown."
In 2014, I read Heather Demetrios's Something Real, a cute, quirky romance that was one of my favorite arcs of 2014. This is not Something Real.
I don't even know what to say.
...
This was one of those books where I could not put it down. I zipped through it in about twelve hours, but it was frustrating. It made me sad. It made me angry. I couldn't sleep last night because I was up thinking about this book.
The use of second person in this book was unique and made it a lot deeper for me. I loved the symbolism of the apple stems.
This was the most accurate depiction of abuse and the affect an unhealthy relationship can have on a person. This book should be required reading for every person on Earth. It's a hard book to read. There's a lot of language and a lot of times where you will cry and a lot of times where you will want to scream at Grace. You will want to scream at Gavin for about 358 pages of the book.
Honestly, I don't think I will ever be able to read this book again. But it doesn't mean that it wasn't good, wasn't realistic. It was too good, too realistic.
You need to read this book.
If you want to read it though, be forewarned, there is a lot of details of abuse, suicide, self-harm, and there's a rape scene. There is a lot of language.
I just. I don't even know how to talk about this book. It affected me deeply. It was so realistic. If you want something happy with a clean ending, this isn't for you. This book is messy and made me angry and sad. But it is so, so important.
"[With] your song in my ear, I forget that I never said yes, that all of it -- the dance, us -- was a foregone conclusion. You told me to be your girlfriend. You didn't wait for me to answer about prom. I gave you my heart on a silver platter and you ate it, piece by bloody piece."
I loved how nuanced Grace's parents were, especially her mom. You felt sympathy for her mother, but at the same time you hated her and that's a pretty accurate depiction of parental abuse. This description puts it nicely:
"I watch my mom out of the corner of my eye when she's not looking and I see...what these years with Roy have cost her. Gray hair, wrinkles, a permanent downturn of the mouth. i see some of myself in that weariness and it scares me... I imagine what it'd be like to be married to someone like him, to live my life flinching every time that person came near. I wonder if that would make me mean sometimes, if I'd be obsessed with invisible dust and forget what it was like to be young."
Honestly, what made her mom the most irredeemable in my eyes wasn't the slap (although that was really freaking awful) but the fact that she made Grace go in and see if Gavin was okay after his accident. That's a pretty crappy thing to do.
I also loved that this book stressed the importance of sisterhood, both with your literal sisters and your best friends.
I was really in to the way this book was written. The second person should have made it less suspenseful and tense, but it didn't somehow. You pretty much find out the entire plot of the book in the first chapter, but like The Book Thief, even when you hear the ending you spend most of the book not wanting it to happen.
In short: this book is really frickin awesome. It is important and it is sad and it will change your life. It did mine.
If I wrote what I really thought about the contents of this book the comment would have to probably get deleted due to swear words, horrible murderous thoughts I have towards her family and Gavin and the sheer volume of ranting that would happen so I will keep it as simple as i can.
When I first picked this book up I actually did not enjoy the over descriptive writing style (I am going to be even more honest it was annoying me so much I almost
DNF'd the book) but as I hit page 30 it all started to sink in and I understood why the writing had to match the story, because it was matching the characters interior monologues and also mirroring both Graces mums and Gavins obsessive behaviours.
I cannot imagine what it would be like to grow up like that. First not being able to trust your family enough to rely on then or confide in then without it having consequences this is just nuts to me, but then to grasp onto something that shouldn't make you feel safe but does because in the beginning it seems better than the alternative.
This books also goes into my "wanted to throw it across the room" list however it goes to the top becausw I wanted to throw it every 10 or so pages on average. My blood was boiling I was talking to myself about how I just want to jump into the book and smack some sense into Gavin and jean.
However I loved that it was shown there was clear mental instability in both characters to cause the behaviour, it wasn't just the author trying to write a "shock factor" story.
This book was the most frustrating read so far of 2019 and im a glad I read it.
When I first picked this book up I actually did not enjoy the over descriptive writing style (I am going to be even more honest it was annoying me so much I almost
DNF'd the book) but as I hit page 30 it all started to sink in and I understood why the writing had to match the story, because it was matching the characters interior monologues and also mirroring both Graces mums and Gavins obsessive behaviours.
I cannot imagine what it would be like to grow up like that. First not being able to trust your family enough to rely on then or confide in then without it having consequences this is just nuts to me, but then to grasp onto something that shouldn't make you feel safe but does because in the beginning it seems better than the alternative.
This books also goes into my "wanted to throw it across the room" list however it goes to the top becausw I wanted to throw it every 10 or so pages on average. My blood was boiling I was talking to myself about how I just want to jump into the book and smack some sense into Gavin and jean.
However I loved that it was shown there was clear mental instability in both characters to cause the behaviour, it wasn't just the author trying to write a "shock factor" story.
This book was the most frustrating read so far of 2019 and im a glad I read it.
"Maybe the only way you really know you love someone is if they can break you with a single sentence."
This was my favorite book of 2017. It's been six months or so since I finished it, and I still can't get over how deeply it portrays the experience of a young woman dealing with an abusive relationship. It's the kind of book that exists somewhere outside of YA, where quality just surpasses genre. I wish everyone had the chance to read this book.
Bad Romance is about Grace. Yes, the bad romance in Bad Romance is about Grace and Gavin, but Heather Demetrios let's us in on Grace's world: her love for Theater and Movies, here dreams and passions, her supportive friends, her deadbeat father and domineering stepfather, and her abusive mother. This other elements give depth to the story and gives Grace some reality. In the beginning, she is her own person, and we watch her slowly and slowly lose herself in Gavin. It's horrifying- because it's very, very real.
“I love the black velvet curtains, how they hang there like a promise, and the cumbersome wooden blocks we use in scenes to act as tables, benches, or chairs. You’d never know we’re in Central California, agriculture Mecca of America: we build kingdoms here, big-city love affairs, and the ancient houses of gods and monsters.”
Bad Romance would be incomplete without it's narrative style. It's told in third-person, with Grace directly addressing Gavin. It's a surprising twist, and it works for the best. Every moment, every memory Grace shares with Gavin, she shares with us. We fall for him with her, and that's the true power of this book. It's not [b:The Girl Who Fell|22864430|The Girl Who Fell|S.M. Parker|https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1428377532s/22864430.jpg|42431495]: a Lifetime movie in YA form, where abuse is defined by mutual obsession and false conceptions. Bad Romance is subtle and realistic.
“Who is this girl, lying in the backseat of a car that smells like McDonald’s and sweat? Who is this boy who smells like cigarettes and won’t look her in the eye?"
When I was younger, I never realized how relationship violence and abuse was a part of the lives of me and my friends. It always seemed like a far off thing- reserved for Health Seminars and Lana del Rey songs. But as I get older, I realize that not all of the relationships my friends had were all-together healthy. Bad Romance is an important novel- and I'm glad it's written for Young Adults. We can all learn from Grace.
absolutely FLOORED. RTC.
Not giving this book and review and was also a DNF. I knew what this book was about going into it but it hit real hard, real fast. Just the way they interacted once we found out Gavin's true colours was enough to make me need to stop. This book was just a little too much and I think for my own good, I won't be picking it back up.
This was a tough read, but really well done. I was hesitant to start it, knowing that it was going to be about tough stuff. It was a bit tough to get into at first, but then I couldn't put it down. The ending "happy." I can't really stop thinking about how horrible Grace's mom and the Giant were though-- it seemed like a lot of awfulness for one teenager. Also- it was clear that Gavin had some SERIOUS issues, I did wonder about him. I mean he was the villain of this story, but he was also just a teenager and it made me start wondering about what it means to be a bad person versus just being a person that makes bad choices. I don't know. I'm sure that Demetrios didn't want me to be wondering about Gavin after reading the book, but there you havei t.
Unapologetic, real, unabashedly honest, Bad Romance is probably the best break-up story I have ever read.
First of all, the way this story is told is outstanding. Brilliant. It starts after the relationship has ended. Grace starts at the beginning and lets it all unfold. And the formatting is almost written like a letter to Gavin. An outside look at how their relationship went down. But an outside look from the inside, if that makes sense.
What could ultimately be the most depressing story---one that would be frustrating and impossible to finish---is told in such a way that you cannot help but be enraptured. It in no way glorifies abusive relationships. I just mean that Grace tells her story with wit and humor. Her voice is remarkably relatable. Most importantly, though, is that as she narrates the story, she often tosses in comments that make the reader realize hindsight is 20/20. She was able to look back and SEE what everyone else had known all along. Worst of all, is the home life that probably drew her eyes to Gavin in the first place. Her mom is in an unhealthy relationship, and you can't help but see the cycle continuing.
BUT...
For all the negative relationships in her life, Grace has some amazing female friends. Ones who always have her back. Strong characters who are the voice of reason---even when Grace was blind to the truth. Also included are the "normal" variety males who prove that this behavior ISN'T typical and you CAN be loved/cared about without having to give up pieces of yourself.
Now, even knowing how it ended, I really was able to see things from the past Grace's point of view. Finally attaining the dream guy. Believing yourself unworthy of someone so seemingly out of your league... haven't we all thought that at some point? And as things slowly unraveled, I couldn't help but understand her feelings. I couldn't help but think he had faults, but he loved her. In his own fucked up way, I'm sure he did. But that way was dangerous. Time and time again.
A moment of honesty: I dated a guy who was a bit like Gavin. We were younger (sophomores in high school), but things just moved quickly. He said "I love you" and I didn't. I wasn't there. It had been two months, I was young, and... it just wasn't me. But he was troubled. He didn't like guys talking to me. He accused me of wanting other guys. He'd get drunk and call me names. He was expelled from school for showing up drunk. A few months later, he heard an older guy had a crush on me. He showed up at his house, confronted him, threatened to beat him up if he spoke to me. Finally, I'd had enough. After 7 short months, I got out. And that night, received a call from his mother that he'd swallowed a bottle of pills. He called me from the hospital and wanted to get back together. Thankfully, I realized that that would have been a big mistake I'd never recover from. And once he was released from the hospital, he tried calling me again. The first few times I answered and we chatted a bit. But it never felt the same. Even friendship was too much. We were on separate paths in life. So, I walked away completely. And after reading this story, I'm so grateful I did. My life and mental stability could have suffered irreversible consequences.
Anyway, this is an extraordinarily important book. It can empower those who feel there is no way out. Those who feel stuck in a situation they desperately want out of. It's heartbreaking at times---I felt myself wishing Gavin could just be who she needed him to be. Someone supportive. Someone who wanted happiness for her. Who wanted Grace's dreams to become reality. And in a messed up way, I think he believed that's what he was doing. And at times, he was sweet. Sickeningly so. And it was those moments that I felt connected to Grace the most. Because for all the bad, he did have good in him, too. It just wasn't enough. And the bad was toxic. Irrevocable.
A cautionary tale, Bad Romance is a must read for women of all ages, regardless of their current romantic status.
First of all, the way this story is told is outstanding. Brilliant. It starts after the relationship has ended. Grace starts at the beginning and lets it all unfold. And the formatting is almost written like a letter to Gavin. An outside look at how their relationship went down. But an outside look from the inside, if that makes sense.
What could ultimately be the most depressing story---one that would be frustrating and impossible to finish---is told in such a way that you cannot help but be enraptured. It in no way glorifies abusive relationships. I just mean that Grace tells her story with wit and humor. Her voice is remarkably relatable. Most importantly, though, is that as she narrates the story, she often tosses in comments that make the reader realize hindsight is 20/20. She was able to look back and SEE what everyone else had known all along. Worst of all, is the home life that probably drew her eyes to Gavin in the first place. Her mom is in an unhealthy relationship, and you can't help but see the cycle continuing.
BUT...
For all the negative relationships in her life, Grace has some amazing female friends. Ones who always have her back. Strong characters who are the voice of reason---even when Grace was blind to the truth. Also included are the "normal" variety males who prove that this behavior ISN'T typical and you CAN be loved/cared about without having to give up pieces of yourself.
Now, even knowing how it ended, I really was able to see things from the past Grace's point of view. Finally attaining the dream guy. Believing yourself unworthy of someone so seemingly out of your league... haven't we all thought that at some point? And as things slowly unraveled, I couldn't help but understand her feelings. I couldn't help but think he had faults, but he loved her. In his own fucked up way, I'm sure he did. But that way was dangerous. Time and time again.
A moment of honesty: I dated a guy who was a bit like Gavin. We were younger (sophomores in high school), but things just moved quickly. He said "I love you" and I didn't. I wasn't there. It had been two months, I was young, and... it just wasn't me. But he was troubled. He didn't like guys talking to me. He accused me of wanting other guys. He'd get drunk and call me names. He was expelled from school for showing up drunk. A few months later, he heard an older guy had a crush on me. He showed up at his house, confronted him, threatened to beat him up if he spoke to me. Finally, I'd had enough. After 7 short months, I got out. And that night, received a call from his mother that he'd swallowed a bottle of pills. He called me from the hospital and wanted to get back together. Thankfully, I realized that that would have been a big mistake I'd never recover from. And once he was released from the hospital, he tried calling me again. The first few times I answered and we chatted a bit. But it never felt the same. Even friendship was too much. We were on separate paths in life. So, I walked away completely. And after reading this story, I'm so grateful I did. My life and mental stability could have suffered irreversible consequences.
Anyway, this is an extraordinarily important book. It can empower those who feel there is no way out. Those who feel stuck in a situation they desperately want out of. It's heartbreaking at times---I felt myself wishing Gavin could just be who she needed him to be. Someone supportive. Someone who wanted happiness for her. Who wanted Grace's dreams to become reality. And in a messed up way, I think he believed that's what he was doing. And at times, he was sweet. Sickeningly so. And it was those moments that I felt connected to Grace the most. Because for all the bad, he did have good in him, too. It just wasn't enough. And the bad was toxic. Irrevocable.
A cautionary tale, Bad Romance is a must read for women of all ages, regardless of their current romantic status.
I've lived this book & I hope if anyone currently living this book is reading it, they find the courage to get out. It's not easy, but you can do it!!
This is going to be a hard book for me to review. Right off the bat, I want to tell you I LOVED THIS BOOK. I've never read a YA book about a controlling, possessive boyfriend (portrayed in a negative way) who wasn't physically violent. And holy shit-- this one portrayed that perfectly.
Gavin starts showing Grace attention and she can't believe her luck. Here's this guy, who she's crushed on forever, and is totally out of her league, treating her like she's a princess. He's making her feel so loved and needed-- and basically giving her everything she doesn't get from her home life. She feels safe and important and cared about.
Then Gavin begins to get too attached. He wants to be with her all the time, wants to know where she is and who she's with. He wants to institute "rules" on what they can do and who they can hang out with. She starts seeing that maybe Gavin isn't Mr. Perfect. But by then it's too late. By then Grace can't imagine her life without Gavin, and he's definitely not going to let her go.
I kind of felt like Ms. Demetrios was following me around in the early 2000's-- because it was around that time that I had my own Gavin. He wasn't a rockstar, but he was like Gavin in every other way. He never hit me, but he may as well have. I still have the emotional scars and will snap if I perceive anyone trying to keep tabs on me. I think a relationship like that stays with you for life.
I hope this gets in the hands of every girl/boy who has or had a Gavin. I don't think I've ever read a book to so accurately depict what someone who is controlling is like. And Grace didn't have family to help her, so if she could get out-- I think it will give hope to so many young people.
The only thing that I didn't exactly love was that there was an escalation of the abuse that crossed the line into something more physical-- and I was kind of hoping this book would just stay in the mental abuse category. It almost felt like it was saying that she couldn't leave until something REALLY bad happened. And I know that's not what the message was, but I wish it didn't mix that in there to muddy the waters.
OVERALL: Thank you Heather Demetrios!! Thank you for writing a book about the guys like Gavin and relationships that are hard to get out of. I think this book should be in every middle school and high school. I feel like every teen/young adult should read it.
My Blog:
This is going to be a hard book for me to review. Right off the bat, I want to tell you I LOVED THIS BOOK. I've never read a YA book about a controlling, possessive boyfriend (portrayed in a negative way) who wasn't physically violent. And holy shit-- this one portrayed that perfectly.
Gavin starts showing Grace attention and she can't believe her luck. Here's this guy, who she's crushed on forever, and is totally out of her league, treating her like she's a princess. He's making her feel so loved and needed-- and basically giving her everything she doesn't get from her home life. She feels safe and important and cared about.
Then Gavin begins to get too attached. He wants to be with her all the time, wants to know where she is and who she's with. He wants to institute "rules" on what they can do and who they can hang out with. She starts seeing that maybe Gavin isn't Mr. Perfect. But by then it's too late. By then Grace can't imagine her life without Gavin, and he's definitely not going to let her go.
I kind of felt like Ms. Demetrios was following me around in the early 2000's-- because it was around that time that I had my own Gavin. He wasn't a rockstar, but he was like Gavin in every other way. He never hit me, but he may as well have. I still have the emotional scars and will snap if I perceive anyone trying to keep tabs on me. I think a relationship like that stays with you for life.
I hope this gets in the hands of every girl/boy who has or had a Gavin. I don't think I've ever read a book to so accurately depict what someone who is controlling is like. And Grace didn't have family to help her, so if she could get out-- I think it will give hope to so many young people.
The only thing that I didn't exactly love was that there was an escalation of the abuse that crossed the line into something more physical-- and I was kind of hoping this book would just stay in the mental abuse category. It almost felt like it was saying that she couldn't leave until something REALLY bad happened. And I know that's not what the message was, but I wish it didn't mix that in there to muddy the waters.
OVERALL: Thank you Heather Demetrios!! Thank you for writing a book about the guys like Gavin and relationships that are hard to get out of. I think this book should be in every middle school and high school. I feel like every teen/young adult should read it.
My Blog:
challenging
dark
emotional
sad
tense
This book is so important; everyone with the ability to read, please read it. The writing is beautiful and it hit deep in all the right places. 5 stars, no doubt