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4.1 AVERAGE
4.1 AVERAGE
The books written by the extraordinarily talented Heather Demetrios leave me so full of ................. aaaauuuuuggggghhhhhhhhhh!!!!! And I mean that in the best possible way! I have not read one of her titles withiut having it IN me for days thereafter...and sometimes far longer. Cuz, even if the basic story doesn't represent my own experience at all, as with this title, I am so violently moved by her descriptions and depictions and characters and voice. I can't even with this chick!!! Again, in a good way.
I guess I could say that, even though I have not had a Bad Romance, nor a home life that resembles Grace's from this book, I felt so much a part of her journey. And yours, Ms. Demetrios. It is wholly insignificant to the story, but I still couldn't help wishing she could have Gideon. Frankly, I want Gideon. I never had a boyfriend or really even a date in high school, so I sort of ache for the life I never had when I read something as beautiful as this. I hope you got your Gideon. ♥
I guess I could say that, even though I have not had a Bad Romance, nor a home life that resembles Grace's from this book, I felt so much a part of her journey. And yours, Ms. Demetrios. It is wholly insignificant to the story, but I still couldn't help wishing she could have Gideon. Frankly, I want Gideon. I never had a boyfriend or really even a date in high school, so I sort of ache for the life I never had when I read something as beautiful as this. I hope you got your Gideon. ♥
An excellent and realistic depiction of how someone falls into a toxic and abusive relationship before they realize it--and that despite how dangerous it is to stay, it's never as easy as just leaving. Demetrios packs a powerful punch that, hopefully, gives insight to those who don't understand how difficult it can be to get away from an abuser (ESPECIALLY as a teenager or young adult) and warns readers that may find themselves in a similar situation. I loved that Grace's reactions and thoughts were true-to-life, but she used them to reflect and express how wrong she was.
I think that the biggest message to be gleaned from this novel is to trust your instincts, and that you are not responsible for abuser. One of the most difficult topics covered in this novel isyour partner threatening self-harm or suicide if you leave and I thought the way Grace found her courage and stood up for herself despite it was really inspiring.
I think that the biggest message to be gleaned from this novel is to trust your instincts, and that you are not responsible for abuser. One of the most difficult topics covered in this novel is
While the story dragged a bit for me, Bad Romance confronts very real and important issues teens face every day, and for that I liked it. To see a different side/type of abuse in a relationship brought to life is heartbreaking, but needed--- because again, it happens and it shouldn't be sugar coated. So bravo to Demetrios for the courage to write this story, even if it might be hard for some to read.
Demetrios also provides information/resources for those who might need help, which is very commendable.
Demetrios also provides information/resources for those who might need help, which is very commendable.
This book gave me a headache from all the frustration and anger it made me feel.
It showed that slavery, abuse and imprisonment comes in all shapes and sizes.
Also, Gavin, F*** You!
It showed that slavery, abuse and imprisonment comes in all shapes and sizes.
Also, Gavin, F*** You!
Grace is in a toxic relationship with a controlling, possessive, manipulative boyfriend, made worse by her home life with her controlling abusive stepfather and her OCD controlling abusive mother. Based in part by [a:Heather Demetrios|6456912|Heather Demetrios|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1399608257p2/6456912.jpg]' life, this book is almost a deep dive in how a person can end up with someone completely toxic and not even know it.
The book is written in a mish-mash of 1st and 2nd person. It's written by Grace to Gavin (toxic boyfriend) from the future. As such there's a lot of the omniscent narrator present as well as a lot of "you"s as it's almost a stream of consciousness book to Gavin. I have to say the writing style of the book is not necessarily enjoyable to read. Perhaps in some way cathartic to the author, but a little off putting for a reader.
I did find two things to be mildly problematic.
The first: So Grace has 2 amazing best friends, and a wise older sister who visits and whom she visits. For a good portion of the book, all 3 of them tell Grace that Gavin is a PoS and to dump his ass. Grace's co-worker and ex-boyfriend also tells Grace that Gavin is not a normal boyfriend and to dump his ass. But it isn't until Grace meets and starts crushing on another guy that she really starts thinking that maybe she should dump Gavin. With all the strong females that Grace has in her life, it's unfortunate that it takes another guy love interest to get Grace closer to the right track.
The second: While Gavin is a toxic manipulative asshole in Grace's life, he's not the only one. Grace also has her mother, her absent dad, and her step-father. Every single one of them are completely toxic. Grace already had a negative self-image and thought process because of her parental figures which was made worse by Gavin. There's a scene near the end where Grace has a quick internal monologue that comes out of nowhere. She finishes it off by hurting herself. This is never touched upon ever again. After she ends it with Gavin (not a spoiler because of how the book is written) and is preparing for college, the book plays it off that she's finally rid of all the bad people and ready to start fresh. But the book never has a moment of internal reflection from Grace. It never has a moment where she realizes how her abusive upbringing would lead to a Gavin in her life. How her father and stepfather were both "Gavin" for her mom. And the book never shows that Grace wouldn't end up in a repeat situation like her mom did. And while a lot of this is based on the author's experience, while she ended up in a good marriage, there's nothings saying that Grace will. When Grace doesn't have her friends constantly by her side or her sister visiting, there's nothing to save Grace from herself.
Part of me thinks it's because of how therapists are painted in this book. Gavin ends up seeing a therapist. He writes to Grace complaining about it, saying that he's only doing it for her. There's a moment where Grace thinks that her mom should see someone for her OCD, but she's doesn't have insurance. But there's never a moment where Grace realizes that therapist could help her as well. One of her friends wants to be a psychologist when she grows up and constantly gives Grace sessions. While it's kind of a joke, her friend makes a few insights for Grace that does make her think. But they never get down to examining Grace and helping her realize how much her family life has affected her moreso than Gavin. Probably because her friend is still in high school. It never comes up for her that she can get a real therapist when she's in college. Because in this book, only people who have "REAL" issues need to see a therapist. Grace's OCD mother. Gavin with his self harm. Grace when Gavin is being abusive. But there's never that moment where Grace realizes how much a therapist could help her as well.
And while that's life and the mindset of a lot of people; this book was obviously written not only as a catharsis for the author, but as warning for the YA demographic reading this book. There's a list of places to turn to if you find yourself or you have friend in Grace's situation. There's a letter from the author that talks about how she was in this situation and she was lucky. But what would have been infinitely helpful was to have her main character have that moment of internal reflection and ask for or realize that she needed to ask for help from a counselor of sorts. Because like I said previously, Grace's home life before Gavin was toxic, Grace's thought process pre-Gavin was toxic. Getting away from Gavin and her parents was only part of the solution for her.
Aside from my issues with the writing style and my two big problems with the book, it is a decent book. Heather Demetrios did a good job of showing the friendship of the trio, and also the slow slide of Gavin from dreamboat boyfriend to boyfriend from hell.
The book is written in a mish-mash of 1st and 2nd person. It's written by Grace to Gavin (toxic boyfriend) from the future. As such there's a lot of the omniscent narrator present as well as a lot of "you"s as it's almost a stream of consciousness book to Gavin. I have to say the writing style of the book is not necessarily enjoyable to read. Perhaps in some way cathartic to the author, but a little off putting for a reader.
I did find two things to be mildly problematic.
The first: So Grace has 2 amazing best friends, and a wise older sister who visits and whom she visits. For a good portion of the book, all 3 of them tell Grace that Gavin is a PoS and to dump his ass. Grace's co-worker and ex-boyfriend also tells Grace that Gavin is not a normal boyfriend and to dump his ass. But it isn't until Grace meets and starts crushing on another guy that she really starts thinking that maybe she should dump Gavin. With all the strong females that Grace has in her life, it's unfortunate that it takes another guy love interest to get Grace closer to the right track.
The second: While Gavin is a toxic manipulative asshole in Grace's life, he's not the only one. Grace also has her mother, her absent dad, and her step-father. Every single one of them are completely toxic. Grace already had a negative self-image and thought process because of her parental figures which was made worse by Gavin. There's a scene near the end where Grace has a quick internal monologue
Spoiler
“You stupid fucking idiot girl. I hate you. You’re just staying with him because you’re a coward, a whore who’s too scared to be alone. Fuck you, Grace. Fuck. You.”Part of me thinks it's because of how therapists are painted in this book. Gavin ends up seeing a therapist
Spoiler
but was in a psych unit after his 1st suicide attempt when his first girlfriend broke up with him, and also his 2nd suicide attempt when Grace tried to break up with himAnd while that's life and the mindset of a lot of people; this book was obviously written not only as a catharsis for the author, but as warning for the YA demographic reading this book. There's a list of places to turn to if you find yourself or you have friend in Grace's situation. There's a letter from the author that talks about how she was in this situation and she was lucky. But what would have been infinitely helpful was to have her main character have that moment of internal reflection and ask for or realize that she needed to ask for help from a counselor of sorts. Because like I said previously, Grace's home life before Gavin was toxic, Grace's thought process pre-Gavin was toxic. Getting away from Gavin and her parents was only part of the solution for her.
Aside from my issues with the writing style and my two big problems with the book, it is a decent book. Heather Demetrios did a good job of showing the friendship of the trio, and also the slow slide of Gavin from dreamboat boyfriend to boyfriend from hell.
I have thoroughly enjoyed all of Heather's books... this one is addicting, powerful, and kept me sitting on the couch for hours -- even though I knew the outcome would not be all roses and sunshine from the first page. Up until this point the only YA book I've read that dealt with abuse in a relationship was "Bleed Like Me" by Christa Desir (another important book from an author I think is underrated).
Grace loves theater, dreams of moving to NYC (ala RENT), and also starts her junior year wanting a serious relationship. Enter Gavin, heartthrob senior and talented musician. Grace and Gavin know each other from their shared time in drama, but not much beyond that. It's not until he comes back to school after a suicide attempt (after which Grace wrote him a letter of support) that a passing friendship blossoms into more.
First love can be obsessive and consuming, and Demetrios rings all those bells here. Grace's changing relationship with her best gal pals, the carefully crafted lies she risks telling to her mom and horrible stepdad... and then later on, questioning all the dreams she ever held beyond her senior year. Grace feels like Gavin is the only one who truly loves and values her existence and he knows he power he holds. His moods change quickly, he believes Grace is his total savior, and all the same, he slowly becomes more and more controlling.
There's a lot to unpack here. Grace's fear that Gavin will fall down another black hole and do something to hurt himself, her fear that he might be the only one to love her that way (since her life is filled with people who treat her like a slave), and that maybe she just doesn't deserve better. The book is not filled with too many joyous moments (when they do exist, they are full and wonderful), but it's a page-turner nonetheless. I fell for Gavin's charms just like Grace did... and felt the weight of her decision to leave her relationship and what that could mean for both of them.
Especially in the current climate, this book is important. My husband sometimes asks me why I like to read "sad books". Well, the world is a sad place but I can also imagine someone picking up this book and it being a life raft for them.
Keywords: junior/senior year, theater, abusive relationships, mom/daughter relationships
Grace loves theater, dreams of moving to NYC (ala RENT), and also starts her junior year wanting a serious relationship. Enter Gavin, heartthrob senior and talented musician. Grace and Gavin know each other from their shared time in drama, but not much beyond that. It's not until he comes back to school after a suicide attempt (after which Grace wrote him a letter of support) that a passing friendship blossoms into more.
First love can be obsessive and consuming, and Demetrios rings all those bells here. Grace's changing relationship with her best gal pals, the carefully crafted lies she risks telling to her mom and horrible stepdad... and then later on, questioning all the dreams she ever held beyond her senior year. Grace feels like Gavin is the only one who truly loves and values her existence and he knows he power he holds. His moods change quickly, he believes Grace is his total savior, and all the same, he slowly becomes more and more controlling.
There's a lot to unpack here. Grace's fear that Gavin will fall down another black hole and do something to hurt himself, her fear that he might be the only one to love her that way (since her life is filled with people who treat her like a slave), and that maybe she just doesn't deserve better. The book is not filled with too many joyous moments (when they do exist, they are full and wonderful), but it's a page-turner nonetheless. I fell for Gavin's charms just like Grace did... and felt the weight of her decision to leave her relationship and what that could mean for both of them.
Especially in the current climate, this book is important. My husband sometimes asks me why I like to read "sad books". Well, the world is a sad place but I can also imagine someone picking up this book and it being a life raft for them.
Keywords: junior/senior year, theater, abusive relationships, mom/daughter relationships
This book tells an important story and shines a light on an abuse many don't see or choose to make excuses for it. And it can't be either sex doing it to either sex. ( just not boys doing it to girls) First love is cute, funny, fresh and can consume all your time and make you ignore other things in your life. First love ( or second or third ) is not making you choose between your love and your friends family or the future.
Grace is already living in a home situation that is not stable or mentally healthy for her to grown in a house under those circumstances. Her mother is compulsive over things that don't reallly matter in the long run and lackadaisical in things that will affect the choices Grace makes in her life.
Enter Gavin who is charming, troubled and cute. He enters Grace's life when she is vulnerable and quickly fills void in her life. Her home life is not loving, doesn't care about her feelings and verbally abuses her. Her stepfather is controlling makes her life a living hell and reduces her mother to a shrinking violet. So all this quickly Gavin's uses agianst her calling it love when it is anything but love and respect.
This book broke down stereotypes I had about these relationships and shown a light on how they happen and why it is so hard to break free. The author brings us compassion, understanding and educates us in a way that brings the pain of this type of relationship to life and gives anyone struggling with this a light and a way out.
It is a 5 star read except the catalyst that is used to make Grace realize her relationship with Gavin is abusive and not loving didn't sit right with me. I felt more when her friends finally said this is ENOUGH, boyfriends don't make you choose his dreams over yours, and he needs to be confident that what you have will survive wherever the future takes you instead of manipulating you with holding back his love to bend you to his will It is not an overnight decision either for Grace but at the end she finds her freedom again
Grace is already living in a home situation that is not stable or mentally healthy for her to grown in a house under those circumstances. Her mother is compulsive over things that don't reallly matter in the long run and lackadaisical in things that will affect the choices Grace makes in her life.
Enter Gavin who is charming, troubled and cute. He enters Grace's life when she is vulnerable and quickly fills void in her life. Her home life is not loving, doesn't care about her feelings and verbally abuses her. Her stepfather is controlling makes her life a living hell and reduces her mother to a shrinking violet. So all this quickly Gavin's uses agianst her calling it love when it is anything but love and respect.
This book broke down stereotypes I had about these relationships and shown a light on how they happen and why it is so hard to break free. The author brings us compassion, understanding and educates us in a way that brings the pain of this type of relationship to life and gives anyone struggling with this a light and a way out.
It is a 5 star read except the catalyst that is used to make Grace realize her relationship with Gavin is abusive and not loving didn't sit right with me. I felt more when her friends finally said this is ENOUGH, boyfriends don't make you choose his dreams over yours, and he needs to be confident that what you have will survive wherever the future takes you instead of manipulating you with holding back his love to bend you to his will It is not an overnight decision either for Grace but at the end she finds her freedom again
Bad Romance by Heather Demetrios is about Grace Carter, throughout the book her mother and step-father are abusive towards and after a while, her boyfriend, Gavin Davis, becomes the same way.
I think my official rating of this book is 2.5 stars. I want to point out that my rating/enjoyment of this book in no way means that I think it is unimportant. This book was unique and necessary but I just didn't enjoy it.
The first thing that I noticed, right at the beginning of the book, is the writing style. I didn't like how it was as if Grace was telling Gavin the story after it had already happened. The way Grace referred to Gavin as 'you' throughout just didn't gel with my tastes. I'm not a fan.
A very small thing that happened right at the beginning, which didn't affect my rating at all but I thought worth mentioning for any readers who may not like it, is the line 'I let go of a breath I didn't know I was holding' is used. Like I said, this isn't a big deal and didn't affect my rating or enjoyment but it just kind of put the book off to a bad start since it just made me think it was going to use more of those cringy cliche lines.
There were a few lines in the book that made me uncomfortable and weren't challenged. There were a couple jokes about suicide and inconsideration for OCD.
Grace's mum's OCD is something I really wanted to talk about. I understand how frustrating it must have been for Grace, considering we read from her point of view, but I just couldn't sympathise with her. I'm sure anyone with OCD would say that if they could not deal with their obsessive tendancies, they wouldn't. It wasn't fair that her mum made her clean, and she was shit absolutely abusive to her, but Grace's inconsideration to what her mum was dealing with mentally kind of bugged me.
I didn't really like any of the characters, which I think is a very large reason for my lower rating. I didn't really like Grace, I didn't hate her but I didn't love her.
Her friends were a good support system for her, but they encouraged her to be with Gideon and that annoyed me too. Would you not just try to get her out of the realtionship with Gavin and give her time to heal instead of practically encouraging her to cheat when you know her boyfriend is totally out of control?
I obviously didn't like Gavin either. Although, I think if the book had been written differently my experience with his character could have been totally different. Because of the lines written into the story letting us know about how their future would turn out, I hated Gavin from the very beginning. I think if the book had been written differently I may have fallen in love with him and then gotten really pissed off at him for being an absolute asshole. I don't know if that makes much sense.
Obviously, I hated Grace's mum and the Giant. They were totally abusive and unfair to her. I think it was weird that no-one ever reported them to the Police or anything considering the amount of people that knew about how they treated Grace. I didn't really like her sister, Beth, she made things seem so totally simple. I know breaking up with Gavin was something Grace should have done a long time ago, for her own health and happiness, but her sister never sympathised with how hard it must be for Grace. She just basically said "It's easy, just break up with him. I don't like him." Grace was obviously struggling and I just didn't think her sister gave her the support she needed.
When you begin this book, you know that Gavin is going to turn abusive and controlling. So reading the book and seeing their relationship from the beginning, it is interesting seeing all of the startings of his abusive nature. All the small things, like saying he didn't want her to cut her hair because he liked it that way and insulting her about small things and then 'kissing them away'. It was also really sad seeing Grace how Grace treated her mum because of the fact she stays with the Giant, and not seeing her realise that Gavin was the same way towards her.
The plot of this book is 100% character centred. It is all about Grace and Gavin, her parents and her friends. I knew that going into the book though, so the fact it was all about characters never bothered me. What I dind't totally love is the fact that you know exactly what is going to happen. You know from the beginning that her mum and the Giant are abusive and you know right from the beginning that Gavin will become abusive. So it becomes obvious that Grace will eventually grow the strength to leave him, because what sort of book would this be if she didn't? It's meant to give the topic of abusive relationships and 'bad romances' a spotlight in YA literature and let victims know that they can survive. So my issue was, I knew everything that was going to happen, when I hadn't even read the book.
So, let's end on a positive note. I enjoyed the small things in this book. The fact that there was a Christian and a lesbian as friends to the main charcter was so natural and inclusive. There was both different family dynamics and parental relationships included. OCD, Depression and Suicide were all included and there was also a small conversation on religion.
So all in all, not a great read. I love the topic and how it is being given a place in the public eye. It is something that definitely needs to be talked about more, and I think people who have suffered from a toxic relationship will have a totally different experience with this. Go into this with caution, I can imagine it being extremely triggering for people who have experienced this. A full list of content warnings can be seen in this review: http://bit.ly/2BebKWN I suggest checking out Trina's review, she gave the book 5/5 stars, so maybe it would be a good check to what I'm saying above.
I'm not going to say that I don't recommend this book, I think my personal preferences and circumstanecs just made for a different reading experience overall. You might love it, and I can see why people do, it's a shame that I just didn't.
I think my official rating of this book is 2.5 stars. I want to point out that my rating/enjoyment of this book in no way means that I think it is unimportant. This book was unique and necessary but I just didn't enjoy it.
The first thing that I noticed, right at the beginning of the book, is the writing style. I didn't like how it was as if Grace was telling Gavin the story after it had already happened. The way Grace referred to Gavin as 'you' throughout just didn't gel with my tastes. I'm not a fan.
A very small thing that happened right at the beginning, which didn't affect my rating at all but I thought worth mentioning for any readers who may not like it, is the line 'I let go of a breath I didn't know I was holding' is used. Like I said, this isn't a big deal and didn't affect my rating or enjoyment but it just kind of put the book off to a bad start since it just made me think it was going to use more of those cringy cliche lines.
There were a few lines in the book that made me uncomfortable and weren't challenged. There were a couple jokes about suicide and inconsideration for OCD.
Grace's mum's OCD is something I really wanted to talk about. I understand how frustrating it must have been for Grace, considering we read from her point of view, but I just couldn't sympathise with her. I'm sure anyone with OCD would say that if they could not deal with their obsessive tendancies, they wouldn't. It wasn't fair that her mum made her clean, and she was shit absolutely abusive to her, but Grace's inconsideration to what her mum was dealing with mentally kind of bugged me.
I didn't really like any of the characters, which I think is a very large reason for my lower rating. I didn't really like Grace, I didn't hate her but I didn't love her.
Her friends were a good support system for her, but they encouraged her to be with Gideon and that annoyed me too. Would you not just try to get her out of the realtionship with Gavin and give her time to heal instead of practically encouraging her to cheat when you know her boyfriend is totally out of control?
I obviously didn't like Gavin either. Although, I think if the book had been written differently my experience with his character could have been totally different. Because of the lines written into the story letting us know about how their future would turn out, I hated Gavin from the very beginning. I think if the book had been written differently I may have fallen in love with him and then gotten really pissed off at him for being an absolute asshole. I don't know if that makes much sense.
Obviously, I hated Grace's mum and the Giant. They were totally abusive and unfair to her. I think it was weird that no-one ever reported them to the Police or anything considering the amount of people that knew about how they treated Grace. I didn't really like her sister, Beth, she made things seem so totally simple. I know breaking up with Gavin was something Grace should have done a long time ago, for her own health and happiness, but her sister never sympathised with how hard it must be for Grace. She just basically said "It's easy, just break up with him. I don't like him." Grace was obviously struggling and I just didn't think her sister gave her the support she needed.
When you begin this book, you know that Gavin is going to turn abusive and controlling. So reading the book and seeing their relationship from the beginning, it is interesting seeing all of the startings of his abusive nature. All the small things, like saying he didn't want her to cut her hair because he liked it that way and insulting her about small things and then 'kissing them away'. It was also really sad seeing Grace how Grace treated her mum because of the fact she stays with the Giant, and not seeing her realise that Gavin was the same way towards her.
The plot of this book is 100% character centred. It is all about Grace and Gavin, her parents and her friends. I knew that going into the book though, so the fact it was all about characters never bothered me. What I dind't totally love is the fact that you know exactly what is going to happen. You know from the beginning that her mum and the Giant are abusive and you know right from the beginning that Gavin will become abusive. So it becomes obvious that Grace will eventually grow the strength to leave him, because what sort of book would this be if she didn't? It's meant to give the topic of abusive relationships and 'bad romances' a spotlight in YA literature and let victims know that they can survive. So my issue was, I knew everything that was going to happen, when I hadn't even read the book.
So, let's end on a positive note. I enjoyed the small things in this book. The fact that there was a Christian and a lesbian as friends to the main charcter was so natural and inclusive. There was both different family dynamics and parental relationships included. OCD, Depression and Suicide were all included and there was also a small conversation on religion.
So all in all, not a great read. I love the topic and how it is being given a place in the public eye. It is something that definitely needs to be talked about more, and I think people who have suffered from a toxic relationship will have a totally different experience with this. Go into this with caution, I can imagine it being extremely triggering for people who have experienced this. A full list of content warnings can be seen in this review: http://bit.ly/2BebKWN I suggest checking out Trina's review, she gave the book 5/5 stars, so maybe it would be a good check to what I'm saying above.
I'm not going to say that I don't recommend this book, I think my personal preferences and circumstanecs just made for a different reading experience overall. You might love it, and I can see why people do, it's a shame that I just didn't.
I think Bad Romance has changed me forever.
What does that even mean? I'm not sure, but I know that it's true.
I DON'T like contemporary novels. I DON'T like books that make me experience sad or hard events. Actually, I have a policy of avoiding books like Bad Romance as if they carried the plague...but I'm a big fan of Heather Demetrios and I trusted her.
And even though this book moved me, even though my heart hurts after reading it, I'm so glad that I did. This story means something to me and I'm still in the process of figuring out what that is.
One of the most beautiful things about Bad Romance is the main character, Grace Carter. Grace is real. Not real as in honest, but real as in a REAL person. I feel like she's someone I knew in high school. Her voice was so strong, so unique, so special. Grace and I have almost nothing in common and we wouldn't have been friends in high school. I was a jock/book nerd and she was in theater... but I could still SEE myself in her pain. How freaking incredible is that?! I still can't even wrap my mind around how skillfully this was written.
And of course, I must mention Gavin. The abuser. The jerk. Before ever picking up this book, I knew he was the bad guy. I knew he would be the cause of so much pain and anger and fear, and yet, I still found myself falling for him. He was tortured, sexy, romantic, generous, and loving....until he wasn't anymore. It caught me off guard as much as it did Grace.
For me, the things that happened in Grace's home-life hurt me the most. That's probably because while I never had my own bad romance, I definitely had a bad dad-mance (just go with it people). Instead of having a "Contrite and Subservient Mother" as an example, I had the "Never Back Down Mother". Just like with Grace and her mom, I picked up on my mother's behaviors (and probably some of my father's) and absolutely carried them into my other relationships. Instead of finding myself at the end of another abusive relationship, I was the abuser. I was so adamant that no one would ever treat me the way my father had, that I'd never let another man walk all over me, that I became so quick to anger, so quick to initiate confrontation. It took me a very long time to see this in myself and begin the process of unlearning this behavior. Kudos to Grace and to her amazing friends for addressing this sooner.
I will be recommending this book far and wide. Bad Romance brings up some beautifully painful truths about relationships, family, love, responsibility, and even mental health, that we should all be talking about, especially with young women.
Thank you, Heather.
P.S. Somebody come give me a hug.
What does that even mean? I'm not sure, but I know that it's true.
I DON'T like contemporary novels. I DON'T like books that make me experience sad or hard events. Actually, I have a policy of avoiding books like Bad Romance as if they carried the plague...but I'm a big fan of Heather Demetrios and I trusted her.
And even though this book moved me, even though my heart hurts after reading it, I'm so glad that I did. This story means something to me and I'm still in the process of figuring out what that is.
One of the most beautiful things about Bad Romance is the main character, Grace Carter. Grace is real. Not real as in honest, but real as in a REAL person. I feel like she's someone I knew in high school. Her voice was so strong, so unique, so special. Grace and I have almost nothing in common and we wouldn't have been friends in high school. I was a jock/book nerd and she was in theater... but I could still SEE myself in her pain. How freaking incredible is that?! I still can't even wrap my mind around how skillfully this was written.
And of course, I must mention Gavin. The abuser. The jerk. Before ever picking up this book, I knew he was the bad guy. I knew he would be the cause of so much pain and anger and fear, and yet, I still found myself falling for him. He was tortured, sexy, romantic, generous, and loving....until he wasn't anymore. It caught me off guard as much as it did Grace.
For me, the things that happened in Grace's home-life hurt me the most. That's probably because while I never had my own bad romance, I definitely had a bad dad-mance (just go with it people). Instead of having a "Contrite and Subservient Mother" as an example, I had the "Never Back Down Mother". Just like with Grace and her mom, I picked up on my mother's behaviors (and probably some of my father's) and absolutely carried them into my other relationships. Instead of finding myself at the end of another abusive relationship, I was the abuser. I was so adamant that no one would ever treat me the way my father had, that I'd never let another man walk all over me, that I became so quick to anger, so quick to initiate confrontation. It took me a very long time to see this in myself and begin the process of unlearning this behavior. Kudos to Grace and to her amazing friends for addressing this sooner.
I will be recommending this book far and wide. Bad Romance brings up some beautifully painful truths about relationships, family, love, responsibility, and even mental health, that we should all be talking about, especially with young women.
Thank you, Heather.
P.S. Somebody come give me a hug.