You need to sign in or sign up before continuing.
Take a photo of a barcode or cover
4.17 AVERAGE
4.17 AVERAGE
dark
reflective
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
No
Loveable characters:
No
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Complicated
⭐️⭐️💫
Critical Score. C+
Personal Score. C
Sorry, but this was pretty mediocre. The writing style isn’t emotional or interior enough for the story, and it’s too heavy on visual imagery for my taste. It’s also not voice-y enough for the multiple first person POV structure.
The UFO plot-line was goofy and odd. It would have worked well as a briefly inserted metaphor for PTSD, but Heim tries to play it out like a suspenseful mystery…the whole book is just waiting for Brian to catch up to what we already know.
That’s the thing; Brian’s half of the book is so, so boring. Almost all of his scenes feel unnecessary and overly long.
Neil, on the other hand, carries this book. But ultimately his arc never reaches an exciting peak; that r*pe scene is nowhere near as shocking or troubling as I expected. Plus, Neil is a really shitty person. That Halloween assault scene with the sparklers?….jfc. What a loser. And blaming that behavior on the trauma doesn’t make him a good person and undercuts the harmless personalities of other abuse victims. My point is that regardless of the reason, Neil is a terrible person.
Really none of the characters won me over. Brian is so plain, and I wanted to know more about his sexuality but we never get there.
On a similar note, I’m unsure what this book is getting at with its take on queerness. I guess it’s not overtly problematic, and I’m glad it doesn’t get into AIDS, but none of it feels all that provocative or incisive for a book about sa PTSD and coming-of-age queerness.
I didn’t realize how much I was disliking this book until i was almost done read it. My opinion was positive until I saw that nothing was coming to fruition—the character and plot arcs, the themes. I’m left feeling unfulfilled by every aspect of this book.
Critical Score. C+
Personal Score. C
Sorry, but this was pretty mediocre. The writing style isn’t emotional or interior enough for the story, and it’s too heavy on visual imagery for my taste. It’s also not voice-y enough for the multiple first person POV structure.
The UFO plot-line was goofy and odd. It would have worked well as a briefly inserted metaphor for PTSD, but Heim tries to play it out like a suspenseful mystery…the whole book is just waiting for Brian to catch up to what we already know.
That’s the thing; Brian’s half of the book is so, so boring. Almost all of his scenes feel unnecessary and overly long.
Neil, on the other hand, carries this book. But ultimately his arc never reaches an exciting peak; that r*pe scene is nowhere near as shocking or troubling as I expected. Plus, Neil is a really shitty person. That Halloween assault scene with the sparklers?….jfc. What a loser. And blaming that behavior on the trauma doesn’t make him a good person and undercuts the harmless personalities of other abuse victims. My point is that regardless of the reason, Neil is a terrible person.
Really none of the characters won me over. Brian is so plain, and I wanted to know more about his sexuality but we never get there.
On a similar note, I’m unsure what this book is getting at with its take on queerness. I guess it’s not overtly problematic, and I’m glad it doesn’t get into AIDS, but none of it feels all that provocative or incisive for a book about sa PTSD and coming-of-age queerness.
I didn’t realize how much I was disliking this book until i was almost done read it. My opinion was positive until I saw that nothing was coming to fruition—the character and plot arcs, the themes. I’m left feeling unfulfilled by every aspect of this book.
dark
sad
fast-paced
Possibly shows it’s cards too early so it’s ending is lined up way too soon and loses its impact. Having said that this book captures the complexity of childhood trauma better than almost anything I’ve read. By going in the complete opposite direction of misery porn it was able to showcase how dangerous our coping mechanisms can be without taking away agency or putting judgement on anything.
challenging
dark
emotional
mysterious
sad
tense
slow-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
No
challenging
dark
emotional
reflective
sad
tense
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
I decided to read this because I watched the movie a few weeks ago and I couldn’t stop thinking about it. Watching it left me with a feeling I had never had before and the book left me with a very similar feeling. I think this story, as brutal and devastating and uncomfortable as it is, has stuck with me because of the realistic, flawed humanity of the characters, and the tenderness that carries through their interactions with each other in certain moments. The way this book is written is very beautiful and descriptive in general, and there were some lines that I absolutely loved. It really helped to ground you in the universe and in the characters. I really enjoyed that the chapters weren’t just from Brian and Neil’s POV’s and that we got to learn about the other people in their lives. I liked reading Eric’s chapters a lot because he wasn’t fleshed out as much in the movie. I’d like to think the ending of the book was hopeful, and that the conversation Neil and Brian had is the beginning of them both healing from the abuse they had experienced. I’d like to think Brian finally knowing what happened to him can open to the door to him recovering, and that Neil can start fully understanding that what happened to him was wrong. I think this book toes the line at being exploitative at times (I can understand someone disliking it because of this), but I think overall the attention to making Neil and Brian’s reactions to abuse so incredibly realistic communicates to me that it’s not meant to be harmful (but that’s just my opinion). This story and these characters have left a mark on me, and I think I’ll have it for a very long time. Maybe for the rest of my life.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Adult/minor relationship, Child abuse, Pedophilia, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence
Moderate: Homophobia
challenging
dark
emotional
mysterious
reflective
sad
tense
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
challenging
dark
emotional
mysterious
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Complicated
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
“It was a light that shone over our faces, our wounds and scars. It was a light so brilliant and white it could have been beamed from heaven, and Brian and I could have been angels, basking in it. But it wasn’t, and we weren’t.”
challenging
dark
emotional
reflective
sad
slow-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Complicated
challenging
dark
emotional
mysterious
sad
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Complicated
Diverse cast of characters:
No