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A Bigger Table: Building Messy, Authentic, and Hopeful Spiritual Community by John Pavlovitz
juliet1102's review
3.0
I like John Pavlovitz. I remember when his essay on what he would do if his kids were LBGTQ first made the rounds and I started following him on social media then. A lot of what he writes resonates with me. However, I've never really been in a place where I felt a crisis of faith over who was *not* welcomed at the table. My growing up in a Presbyterian church touched very little on welcoming the other and by the time I became aware of the fact that some people were shunned by the church, I had been confirmed into the Episcopal church which was several years ahead in inclusive practice than most other denominations. Where I struggle most is how to love my conservative neighbor, my Trump loving, gun loving, immigrant hating, LGBTQ hating, "all-knowing" Christian relatives and neighbors. This book didn't do much to help me figure that out.
stacyroth's review
4.0
I received an ARC of this book from NetGalley in exchange for my unbiased opinion.
In A Bigger Table, John Pavlovitz talks about the ways Christians can make the church welcoming to all people. Too often, Christians use the differences in other people to put up a fence and isolate themselves. Instead, we need to show them Christ's love. As Jesus often dined with prostitutes, tax collectors, and other marginalized people in his time, so we need to invite the marginalized people of our time to spend time with us and listen to their stories.
I have enjoyed John Pavlovitz's blog posts and was excited to get a chance to read his book. A lot of what he says will resonate with those who feel alienated by what the American church has become. The world would be a better place if people would listen to those with different backgrounds from them.
In A Bigger Table, John Pavlovitz talks about the ways Christians can make the church welcoming to all people. Too often, Christians use the differences in other people to put up a fence and isolate themselves. Instead, we need to show them Christ's love. As Jesus often dined with prostitutes, tax collectors, and other marginalized people in his time, so we need to invite the marginalized people of our time to spend time with us and listen to their stories.
I have enjoyed John Pavlovitz's blog posts and was excited to get a chance to read his book. A lot of what he says will resonate with those who feel alienated by what the American church has become. The world would be a better place if people would listen to those with different backgrounds from them.
lauriebuchanan's review
5.0
I was raised in a faith tradition where the table was (and still is) small. In fact, it's the size of a TV tray. There's no room for anyone who's not their same color, sexual orientation, economic status, academic background, political affiliation, and faith. If you're different, you're going straight to hell and eternal damnation on a bullet train on greased rails. That's why I left, running as fast and as far from that belief system as I could.
I loved reading A BIGGER TABLE. In it, John Pavlovitz blows those rigid myths right out of the water. The table is big enough for everyone. Regardless.
I loved reading A BIGGER TABLE. In it, John Pavlovitz blows those rigid myths right out of the water. The table is big enough for everyone. Regardless.
neyhart's review
3.0
This is another one of those books I wish I had been able to read several years ago when I was really freaking out about how deep the rabbit hole would go for me... I love this quote from the book:
"I hadn't yet summoned the courage to face the most terrifying questions Christians can ever ask themselves: "if this small part of my faith that I always believed to be true no longer is, what else might not be true?" and "If the Bible doesn't say what I'd grown up believing it says in these handful of verses, where else have I gotten it wrong?" It begins to feel as though those questions themselves will destroy your faith for good, when in reality they should be welcome intrusions. Doubt isn't the sign of a dead faith, not necessarily even of a sickly one. It's often the sign of a faith that is allowing itself to be tested, one that is brave enough to see if it can hold up under stress. The worst thing you can do in those seasons of uncertainty is to pile upon your already burdened shoulders guilt for the mere fact that the wavering exists. God is more than big enough to withstand the weight of your vacillating belief, your part-time skepticism, and even your full-blown faith crises. We've been taught that such things are the antithesis of belief, usually by those who are afraid to be transparent about their own instability. God can handle your wavering, friend, even if those around you can't." (John Pavlovitz, 44)
I give it 3 stars because I like the book, I like the message of the book, but there's not enough meat to it or content to warrant a repeat reading.
Here are some other quotes I liked:
“The heart of the bigger table is the realization that we don't have to share someone's experience to respect their road. As we move beyond the lazy theology and easy caricatures that seek to remove any gray from people's lives, we can meet them in that grayness, right where they are, without demanding they become something else in order to earn proximity to us or to a God who loves them dearly. Just as was true in the life and ministry of Jesus. Real love is not contingent upon alteration; it simply is. There is no earning of fellowship or deserving of closeness; there is only the invitation itself and the joy that comes when you are fully seen and heard.” (18-19)
“The truth is real spirituality is usually costly. Many followers of Jesus end up learning this not from the world outside the Church but from our faith tradition itself. We end up choosing Jesus and losing our religion; finding proximity to him creates distance from others. If you seek to expand the table you're going to find yourself in a tough spot. The truth may not get you fired. (Although it might).” (52).
“This is what it means to be the people of the bigger table: to look for the threads that might tie us together and to believe that these are more powerful than we imagine. This is the only future the Church really has. Disparate people will not be brought together through a denomination or a pastor or by anything the institutional church can offer. We know that now. These were useful for a time, but they are an exercise in diminishing returns. The Church will thrive only to the degree it is willing to be out making space for a greater swath of humanity and by recognizing the redemptive power of relationships. (62-63)
This sounds all too familiar:
“Frame the spiritual journey as a stark good-vs.-evil battle of warring sides long enough and you’ll eventually see the Church and those around you in the same way too. You’ll begin to filter the world through the lens of conflict. Everything becomes a threat to the family; everyone becomes a potential enemy. Fear becomes the engine that drives the whole thing. When this happens, your default response to people who are different or who challenge you can turn from compassion to contempt. You become less like God and more like the Godfather. In those times, instead of being a tool to fit your heart for invitation, faith can become a weapon to defend yourself against the encroaching sinners threatening God’s people—whom we conveniently always consider ourselves among. Religion becomes a cold, cruel distance maker, pushing from the table people who aren’t part of the brotherhood and don’t march in lockstep with the others.” (28)
“I knew without blinking that I didn't have to choose between loving God and loving my brother - and he didn't have to choose between being gay and being adored by God.” (17)
"I hadn't yet summoned the courage to face the most terrifying questions Christians can ever ask themselves: "if this small part of my faith that I always believed to be true no longer is, what else might not be true?" and "If the Bible doesn't say what I'd grown up believing it says in these handful of verses, where else have I gotten it wrong?" It begins to feel as though those questions themselves will destroy your faith for good, when in reality they should be welcome intrusions. Doubt isn't the sign of a dead faith, not necessarily even of a sickly one. It's often the sign of a faith that is allowing itself to be tested, one that is brave enough to see if it can hold up under stress. The worst thing you can do in those seasons of uncertainty is to pile upon your already burdened shoulders guilt for the mere fact that the wavering exists. God is more than big enough to withstand the weight of your vacillating belief, your part-time skepticism, and even your full-blown faith crises. We've been taught that such things are the antithesis of belief, usually by those who are afraid to be transparent about their own instability. God can handle your wavering, friend, even if those around you can't." (John Pavlovitz, 44)
I give it 3 stars because I like the book, I like the message of the book, but there's not enough meat to it or content to warrant a repeat reading.
Here are some other quotes I liked:
“The heart of the bigger table is the realization that we don't have to share someone's experience to respect their road. As we move beyond the lazy theology and easy caricatures that seek to remove any gray from people's lives, we can meet them in that grayness, right where they are, without demanding they become something else in order to earn proximity to us or to a God who loves them dearly. Just as was true in the life and ministry of Jesus. Real love is not contingent upon alteration; it simply is. There is no earning of fellowship or deserving of closeness; there is only the invitation itself and the joy that comes when you are fully seen and heard.” (18-19)
“The truth is real spirituality is usually costly. Many followers of Jesus end up learning this not from the world outside the Church but from our faith tradition itself. We end up choosing Jesus and losing our religion; finding proximity to him creates distance from others. If you seek to expand the table you're going to find yourself in a tough spot. The truth may not get you fired. (Although it might).” (52).
“This is what it means to be the people of the bigger table: to look for the threads that might tie us together and to believe that these are more powerful than we imagine. This is the only future the Church really has. Disparate people will not be brought together through a denomination or a pastor or by anything the institutional church can offer. We know that now. These were useful for a time, but they are an exercise in diminishing returns. The Church will thrive only to the degree it is willing to be out making space for a greater swath of humanity and by recognizing the redemptive power of relationships. (62-63)
This sounds all too familiar:
“Frame the spiritual journey as a stark good-vs.-evil battle of warring sides long enough and you’ll eventually see the Church and those around you in the same way too. You’ll begin to filter the world through the lens of conflict. Everything becomes a threat to the family; everyone becomes a potential enemy. Fear becomes the engine that drives the whole thing. When this happens, your default response to people who are different or who challenge you can turn from compassion to contempt. You become less like God and more like the Godfather. In those times, instead of being a tool to fit your heart for invitation, faith can become a weapon to defend yourself against the encroaching sinners threatening God’s people—whom we conveniently always consider ourselves among. Religion becomes a cold, cruel distance maker, pushing from the table people who aren’t part of the brotherhood and don’t march in lockstep with the others.” (28)
“I knew without blinking that I didn't have to choose between loving God and loving my brother - and he didn't have to choose between being gay and being adored by God.” (17)
pettydus's review
5.0
“Friend, the heart of the bigger table is the realization that we don’t have to share someone’s experience to respect their road. As we move beyond the lazy theology and easy caricatures that seek to remove any grey from people’s lives, we can meet them in that greyness, right where they are, without demanding that they become something else in order to earn proximity to us or to a God who loves them dearly. Just as was true in the life and ministry of Jesus, real love is not contingent upon alteration: it simply is. There is no earning of fellowship or deserving of closeness; there is only the invitation itself and the joy that comes when you are fully seen and heard.”
Beautiful treatise that challenges me to embrace radical hospitality, total authenticity, true diversity, and an agenda-free community. Christian friends that are seeking to build bigger tables instead of walls, check this out. Happy to share if you’re willing to forgive my highlighting.
Beautiful treatise that challenges me to embrace radical hospitality, total authenticity, true diversity, and an agenda-free community. Christian friends that are seeking to build bigger tables instead of walls, check this out. Happy to share if you’re willing to forgive my highlighting.
flatdana's review
4.0
Part memoir, part spiritual re-evaluation, John Pavlovitz's book, A Bigger Table, examines the type of invitation the world desperately needs. Recent political and religious events are creating more exclusive, more isolated communities, even within the church. While this may seem a reasonable fear reaction from the world, the church is called to a higher purpose: to invite any one and every one to the table, and a different way of living and loving.
Like me, John has undergone his own faith deconstruction and reconstruction. He has been both welcomed into and excommunicated from the church. I related to his questions and his search. I understand the discomfort of hearing dissonance between the pulpit and the gospel. I know how hard it is to not become so jaded and cynical you simply walk away from organized religion altogether.
But Mr. Pavlovitz doesn't merely provide a grocery list of problems he finds within church walls, he also shares communities and ministries that are choosing inclusion over exclusion. He examines different and possibly new ways to approach individuals of different faith, sexuality and lifestyle based on our sameness more than our differences. He argues that the table Christ offers is more than large enough to accommodate all who seek to know God and each other better.
Like me, John has undergone his own faith deconstruction and reconstruction. He has been both welcomed into and excommunicated from the church. I related to his questions and his search. I understand the discomfort of hearing dissonance between the pulpit and the gospel. I know how hard it is to not become so jaded and cynical you simply walk away from organized religion altogether.
But Mr. Pavlovitz doesn't merely provide a grocery list of problems he finds within church walls, he also shares communities and ministries that are choosing inclusion over exclusion. He examines different and possibly new ways to approach individuals of different faith, sexuality and lifestyle based on our sameness more than our differences. He argues that the table Christ offers is more than large enough to accommodate all who seek to know God and each other better.
asuiterclarke's review
5.0
I got an advanced review copy from NetGalley for this book in exchange for an honest review. A Bigger Table was just the refreshing, honest book I needed to get me through the last few months of 2017. It's been a tough year in so many respects, but especially spiritually for me. In a time where so many spiritual leaders seem to be doubling down on bigotry and happily allowing anyone who disagrees with them to "leave the fold", I appreciate Pavlovitz's call to pastors, Christians, and the "spiritually curious" to come together in vulnerable, loving, and open community. This book is a necessary call to unity in a time of great division. Thank you for giving me the chance to read it early.
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