Reviews tagging 'Rape'

Refusing Compulsory Sexuality: A Black Asexual Lens on Our Sex-Obsessed Culture by Sherronda J. Brown

26 reviews

biobeetle's review against another edition

challenging hopeful informative inspiring medium-paced

4.75

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Acephobia/Arophobia, Racism, and Misogyny

Moderate: Homophobia and Rape

Minor: Sexual violence and Violence

chamomiledaydreams's review against another edition

informative medium-paced

5.0

This book is a fantastic read!  It highlights historical equivalents of asexuality (such as frigidity) and explains how they were often conflated with other non-heterosexual identities such as lesbianism.  It addresses the many ways in which compulsory sexuality harms everyone, asexual and allosexual alike, and reaffirms the inherent queerness of asexuality (and by extension, aromanticism).  

Additionally, it explains the concept of chrononormativity to demonstrate how society expects everyone to reach certain milestones at specific points in their lives.  Queer people challenge this concept for many reasons.  For instance, a closeted lesbian might not be able to date and explore her sexuality until well into her twenties, while her straight peers have likely been at this for over a decade.  Similarly, but even more queerly, asexual people often never hit these milestones at all, especially if they are averse to sex and romance.

Sherronda J. Brown also discusses the conflicting sexual stereotypes that apply to Black aces.  They talk about the history of anti-Black racism and how hypersexuality remains a Black stereotype to this day, which can make it especially difficult for Black aces to be believed or for their asexual identities to be legible to others.  

I have identified as ace for over a decade now, and I am thrilled that ace scholarship such as this book exists.  It validates many of my own experiences at the same time that it opens my mind to concepts and trends that I was not previously aware of.  I would recommend this book to anyone interested in thinking more critically about asexuality and treating it like you would any other identity in queer studies.  I wish I had been assigned texts like this when I was in school! 

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Sexism, Colonisation, Racism, Sexual violence, Sexual assault, Acephobia/Arophobia, Slavery, and Rape

Minor: Police brutality

peggy_racham's review against another edition

4.75

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Content Warnings

Minor: Sexual harassment, Slavery, Biphobia, Emotional abuse, Mental illness, Misogyny, Outing, Forced institutionalization, Acephobia/Arophobia, Body shaming, Medical trauma, Addiction, Racism, Violence, Bullying, Child abuse, Classism, Hate crime, Rape, Colonisation, Domestic abuse, Dysphoria, Lesbophobia, Homophobia, Sexism, Sexual violence, Toxic relationship, and Transphobia

peachani's review against another edition

challenging informative slow-paced

5.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Racism and Slavery

Moderate: Medical trauma and Body shaming

Minor: Rape, Dysphoria, Racial slurs, Sexual harassment, Religious bigotry, Ableism, and Sexual assault

ghosthermione's review against another edition

5.0

I read this back in 2022 as an ARC. I had big plans to review it, as it absolutely blew my mind and I highlighted about 500 sentences that were either impactful or resonated with me. 
And then i put so much pressure on myself about doing the book justice that I ended up never writing that review. 
The gyst of it is, this book should be compulsory reading. Especially for anyone interested in sexuality, race, gender, and the intersection of the three. It felt like it was articulating things I somehow knew but hadn't quite been able to put words to. And then went deeper than that into aspects I'd not even begun to consider. 

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Transphobia, Rape, Acephobia/Arophobia, Racism, Colonisation, Misogyny, and Sexual violence

workingdaley's review against another edition

challenging hopeful informative reflective slow-paced

5.0

I feel like this is a deeply important read for every queer person, especially Black asexuals. It's deeply important for us to be able to understand asexuality in general, as it's a very misunderstood orientation, but I feel it's especially important to understand asexuality through a Black lens. This book managed to not only speak to some of the thoughts about my asexuality as a Black person that I was only partially able to articulate before reading this, but also speaks a lot to my disconnect with gender and my disconnect with the "human experience" as someone who is Black, asexual, aromantic, agender, and autistic. It also manages to speak to my frustrations with the realization that I've fallen out of the chrononormative structure that's been set out for me. And while my hesitations around marriage and children were going to cause this for me eventually, having it happen so early in my life forces me to really reflect on why life is structured in the way that it is, and what it means for me and my future that I've decidedly fallen off of my pre-determined path. This book has also given me tools to help better navigate consent and trying to work towards a world where we can break free of the allonormative assumption that we should all be desiring sex, and the racist assumption that as a Black person, I am always consenting to sex by my mere existence. I cannot recommend this book to enough people. I really do think that our understanding of queerness is improved when we can acknowledge and analyze the Black asexual lens.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Misogyny, Rape, Acephobia/Arophobia, and Racism

Moderate: Sexual assault, Sexism, Fatphobia, Medical trauma, Sexual violence, Slavery, Sexual harassment, and Domestic abuse

Minor: Biphobia, Homophobia, Religious bigotry, Violence, Death, Emotional abuse, Lesbophobia, Suicidal thoughts, Ableism, Hate crime, Body shaming, Physical abuse, Colonisation, and Transphobia

maddramaqueen's review against another edition

challenging emotional informative reflective medium-paced

3.5

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Sexual violence, Racism, Medical trauma, Misogyny, Sexism, Rape, Acephobia/Arophobia, and Sexual assault

Moderate: Body shaming, Homophobia, Slavery, Outing, Physical abuse, and Colonisation

Minor: Dysphoria, Fatphobia, Toxic relationship, Domestic abuse, Ableism, Emotional abuse, Mental illness, Biphobia, Classism, Bullying, Cultural appropriation, Lesbophobia, Alcohol, Pandemic/Epidemic, Abortion, Panic attacks/disorders, Police brutality, Religious bigotry, and Transphobia

booktribe's review against another edition

I was so excited to read a book from the perspective of a Black asexual person because I am always on the lookout for more Black asexual books. Especially because the title put words to thoughts that I’ve been having for years. I had never heard the term “compulsory sexuality” before finding this book and when I saw that term something clicked in me and I finally had words for what I’d been warring with for a while. So, as you can guess, I was incredibly excited for this book! But, sadly I could not finish it. I had to give up halfway through.

The topics that this book touches on are necessary, interesting, and enlightening. However, the writing is not for me at all. It is INCREDIBLY pretentious. The author writes the same thing over and over again in different ways, not because they want to make sure you understand, but just to fill up space. Reading this book feels like reading a textbook without learning anything. The writing is so clunky and hard to digest. There was a lot of pontification to the point where the book felt like a chore to read. 

I did enjoy some parts of this book despite my problems with the writing style, but I just can’t continue. I am grateful to this book for giving me the words I was looking for in the term “compulsory sexuality”. Now I will try to find other books and articles on the topic for further reading because as much as I tried to push through and love this book, I just couldn’t. We need more books about this topic. Better books. 

If you’re a person who doesn’t mind pretentious writing, I’d still recommend giving this book a try because the topics discussed are so important and these conversations are necessary to have in our current society. 

Thank you North Atlantic Books and NetGalley for this arc. All opinions are my own.

TW: rape

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Rape

thewarbler's review against another edition

informative inspiring sad slow-paced

3.5

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Acephobia/Arophobia

Moderate: Rape and Fatphobia

theabee's review against another edition

challenging informative reflective medium-paced

4.75

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Acephobia/Arophobia

Moderate: Violence, Racial slurs, Racism, and Rape