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mollyjordan's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
hopeful
informative
sad
fast-paced
3.0
chana_aurora's review against another edition
4.0
Evidentially I read this book in 2016 but I didn’t remember doing so. So I read it again in 2022. It’s hard for me to rate a memoir since it’s someone telling their story. I have it a 4 for the honest accounts the author shared about her life and the choices she made. It was heartbreaking to hear how she repeatedly reached out to her parents and they never showed up. This is a book filled with trauma
bethanybee626's review against another edition
4.0
I really enjoyed this book into Leah's former and present life. It was a quick read but had plenty of substance.
mandapandagrace's review against another edition
3.0
Graphic - Definitely for a mature audience. But it was a well written and intriguing story. I would not recommend this for everyone, especially those more conservative, who cannot stomach what it might mean to live "secular" life in full.
beemini's review against another edition
4.0
A brutal Molotov cocktail of a book. I would have liked more background of the family life before the bombs of her “misbehaving” start exploding, but her treatment by her family is plain abuse, horrifying neglect, and refusal to deal with her obvious mental health issues. The exclusion of women from
religious life and their treatment in general in ultra-Orthodoxy is a topic I have long had very very strong feelings about (I was raised in Reform Judaism and never felt excluded) and seems to end one of two ways: ultimate submission or ultimate escape. Leah escapes but submits to humiliation after humiliation because she knows nothing else. It’s destructive, but ultimately a growth process with what seems to be a happy ending. I’d read anything she writes in the future.
religious life and their treatment in general in ultra-Orthodoxy is a topic I have long had very very strong feelings about (I was raised in Reform Judaism and never felt excluded) and seems to end one of two ways: ultimate submission or ultimate escape. Leah escapes but submits to humiliation after humiliation because she knows nothing else. It’s destructive, but ultimately a growth process with what seems to be a happy ending. I’d read anything she writes in the future.
nivek1385's review against another edition
5.0
N.B. I received a free copy of this book through the First Reads program.
Prior to reading this book, I had never heard of Yeshivism or its relationship to Judaism. Most of the members of the tribe that I know are part of the Reform branch. As such, it was quite interesting to me to learn about a sect that I didn't know existed. Now, I will say that I would like to learn more about the sect as this presents a very biased anti-yeshivist point-of-view (quite understandably from the experiences of the author, though).
This is the author's memoir and is very much about her reactions and thoughts to her experiences. That leads to a very biased, one-sided approach to the issues involved. That's not meant to be a knock against the book, just a simple set of comments. She had a rough set of experiences and you definitely feel for her throughout the memoir. I really enjoyed her style of writing and did not want to put the book down. It was a very easy read, though the emotional roller coaster was not easy. I am glad that she seems to have escaped what seemed so inescapable for her and others that were mentioned in the story. I understand that she has fought against yeshivism and has been trying to raise awareness to help support those who want to leave yeshivism.
I definitely recommend picking up this memoir, though I'm not really sure of to whom specifically to recommend it. I think that this could be a good book club book, though, as it does seem like it would lend itself to discussion easily.
Prior to reading this book, I had never heard of Yeshivism or its relationship to Judaism. Most of the members of the tribe that I know are part of the Reform branch. As such, it was quite interesting to me to learn about a sect that I didn't know existed. Now, I will say that I would like to learn more about the sect as this presents a very biased anti-yeshivist point-of-view (quite understandably from the experiences of the author, though).
This is the author's memoir and is very much about her reactions and thoughts to her experiences. That leads to a very biased, one-sided approach to the issues involved. That's not meant to be a knock against the book, just a simple set of comments. She had a rough set of experiences and you definitely feel for her throughout the memoir. I really enjoyed her style of writing and did not want to put the book down. It was a very easy read, though the emotional roller coaster was not easy. I am glad that she seems to have escaped what seemed so inescapable for her and others that were mentioned in the story. I understand that she has fought against yeshivism and has been trying to raise awareness to help support those who want to leave yeshivism.
I definitely recommend picking up this memoir, though I'm not really sure of to whom specifically to recommend it. I think that this could be a good book club book, though, as it does seem like it would lend itself to discussion easily.
sde's review against another edition
3.0
I liked this book a lot better than Unorthodox, which I also recently read, and which also tells the story of a girl leaving her Ultra Orthodox upbringing. This book seemed more honest and more about the author herself than about members of her family.
I greatly enjoyed the first half of the book where the author takes the reader through the process of questioning and uncertainty. There were many things she loved about her religion, but she keeps tripping over problems and almost unexpectedly is on the outside of her religion.
I felt the second half of the book was not as insightful and got a bit repetitive. I know she didn't tell us about every sexual encounter she had, but it felt that way. I also wish she explored her relationship with her professor a little more. I can only hope she is getting therapy on that one. It was actually the most affirming of her relationships, but still weird.
The thing that I think is useful for parents reading this book is the whole exploration of too high expectations and strict guidelines actually pushing a child into the very life you DON'T want them to have. If the parents had just given Leah a little leeway, she never would have gone as far as she did. She felt that she was already rejected, so why try to stay on the straight and narrow.
The one thing that shocked me was the way the parents left her to completely fend for herself in New York City when she was 16 YEARS OLD. She had no high school diploma, yet they expected her to be able to support herself in her own studio apartment. She hadn't even grown up in New York and didn't know anyone there. It also seemed odd that such strict parents would allow her to live in her own apartment.
I was sort of annoyed by her fetishizing of Harvard at the end of the book. I mean, turning down a complete scholarship to University of Chicago?!? But, given the sheltered life she had growing up, I understand it.
I greatly enjoyed the first half of the book where the author takes the reader through the process of questioning and uncertainty. There were many things she loved about her religion, but she keeps tripping over problems and almost unexpectedly is on the outside of her religion.
I felt the second half of the book was not as insightful and got a bit repetitive. I know she didn't tell us about every sexual encounter she had, but it felt that way. I also wish she explored her relationship with her professor a little more. I can only hope she is getting therapy on that one. It was actually the most affirming of her relationships, but still weird.
The thing that I think is useful for parents reading this book is the whole exploration of too high expectations and strict guidelines actually pushing a child into the very life you DON'T want them to have. If the parents had just given Leah a little leeway, she never would have gone as far as she did. She felt that she was already rejected, so why try to stay on the straight and narrow.
The one thing that shocked me was the way the parents left her to completely fend for herself in New York City when she was 16 YEARS OLD. She had no high school diploma, yet they expected her to be able to support herself in her own studio apartment. She hadn't even grown up in New York and didn't know anyone there. It also seemed odd that such strict parents would allow her to live in her own apartment.
I was sort of annoyed by her fetishizing of Harvard at the end of the book. I mean, turning down a complete scholarship to University of Chicago?!? But, given the sheltered life she had growing up, I understand it.