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mrs_bonaventure's review against another edition
3.0
Hmm, I enjoyed the writing and it’s very perceptive and poetic. A pleasant read. But, I’d have two criticisms..
It’s very much part of that genre of “discovering motherhood” which is very important when you are in that life stage and much less so as your child/ children grow (or before, or if you don’t have them). So it’s a little intense, a little one-dimensional, which reflects the experience itself. You come out of the other end eventually.
But also - there is no real thesis here. There is lots of acute observation but it doesn’t really add up to a “so what” that helps the reader understand how this experience fits into all parts of our world. The writer is writing from a privileged white (first generation) American position and doesn’t speculate what the intensity of new motherhood means to those on minimum wage who have to return to work as quickly as possible, or who lose their work as a result of motherhood, or who have no choice about motherhood.
In itself it’s a beautiful book but it’s more like a work of poetry than a polemic. Perhaps my expectations were wrong.
It’s very much part of that genre of “discovering motherhood” which is very important when you are in that life stage and much less so as your child/ children grow (or before, or if you don’t have them). So it’s a little intense, a little one-dimensional, which reflects the experience itself. You come out of the other end eventually.
But also - there is no real thesis here. There is lots of acute observation but it doesn’t really add up to a “so what” that helps the reader understand how this experience fits into all parts of our world. The writer is writing from a privileged white (first generation) American position and doesn’t speculate what the intensity of new motherhood means to those on minimum wage who have to return to work as quickly as possible, or who lose their work as a result of motherhood, or who have no choice about motherhood.
In itself it’s a beautiful book but it’s more like a work of poetry than a polemic. Perhaps my expectations were wrong.
f18's review
I most enjoyed the thoughts about language. The title I think sets you up for something more provocative than the actual content (even the essay with that title just skirts around that idea- not that subtlety is bad necessarily) and while this is still a book about the intersection of feminism and pregnancy/motherhood I ended up being only moderately interested.
Essays read:
Love Letter to Woody Plants
Being Portal
Calling My Grandmothers, Calling the Frontier
Our Sphincters, Our Births
Uncertainty, or, A Woman is a Woman Until She is a Mother
Remembering and Forgetting: Before and After Motherhood
Content Warnings
As you'd expect from a book in this topic there are descriptions of being pregnant and giving birth. They weren't dwelled upon nor extremely graphic but they aren't glossed over either.
julshakespeare's review against another edition
4.0
4.3/5 stars, full review to come! I just love books about motherhood.
Organization : 4/5
Writing: 4/5
Enjoyment of subject/ideas: 5/5
Organization : 4/5
Writing: 4/5
Enjoyment of subject/ideas: 5/5
lizzieuch's review
3.0
Prushinskaya raises some intriguing ideas that definitely have me continuing to ponder. Otherwise, I was pretty disappointed by this book. At first, I figured that I wasn’t connecting to her story because I’ve never been pregnant or had children and so I couldn’t relate. But really, the best writing cultivates connection no matter the topic. So, I think this work is more of a commiseration between a mother and other women contemplating, attempting, or experiencing motherhood, rather than the profound dissection of womanhood vs/and motherhood that I was hoping for (especially because of the title - what a great one!) There are a few moments that come very close to being very good, but the rest is just ok or trying very hard and never hitting the mark. And worse, there was an unfortunate number of writing errors (missing letters and words mostly) especially in proportion to the length of the book, which really detracted from the artistry and mood that she was trying to create.
In general, this was interesting and a very quick read, but not particularly insightful or life-changing.
In general, this was interesting and a very quick read, but not particularly insightful or life-changing.
jamesfigy's review
5.0
Anna Prushinskaya paints a beautiful and bitingly honest portrait of motherhood, the before and after. The book draws on the writing of Alice Walker and Anne Carson, advice from her own Russian grandmothers, and lessons with her doula to show the range of ideas about how a child comes into the world and the ways in which it changes a woman. Does the discomfort stop at birth or continue with sleep deprivation and pumping breastmilk in a supply closet at the office? Does she become more compassionate, more attuned to the pain of another human being? How can she not?
For Prushinskaya, though, being a writer complicates the matter. The day-to-day experiences become “material,” which either enriches or cheapens her relationship with her son. A peaceful afternoon listening to music with her son feels “so stock” she’d rather leave it out. “I judge myself for wanting to omit this life from an imprint of life, this essay," she writes. "Then, I judge myself for that, because I am a writer and I require honesty first and editing second.”
Either way, the prose is clear, flowing, and economical, each sentence saying something big with no extraneous words (e.g. “The author needn’t author the reader’s imagination”). The book also considers the decision not to have children, and the “public and unwelcome probing” it elicits. Discussing the book Selfish, Shallow, and Self-Absorbed: Sixteen Writers on the Decision Not to Have Kids, the author explores the choice (sometimes, other times accident, and still other times incredible struggle) to have a child. “It is funny to think about this careful, logical thinking in light of my current situation, standing next to the freezer and eating chocolate chips by the handful because I cannot stand to hear the baby cry," writes Prushinskaya. "Did I choose this particular situation?”
For Prushinskaya, though, being a writer complicates the matter. The day-to-day experiences become “material,” which either enriches or cheapens her relationship with her son. A peaceful afternoon listening to music with her son feels “so stock” she’d rather leave it out. “I judge myself for wanting to omit this life from an imprint of life, this essay," she writes. "Then, I judge myself for that, because I am a writer and I require honesty first and editing second.”
Either way, the prose is clear, flowing, and economical, each sentence saying something big with no extraneous words (e.g. “The author needn’t author the reader’s imagination”). The book also considers the decision not to have children, and the “public and unwelcome probing” it elicits. Discussing the book Selfish, Shallow, and Self-Absorbed: Sixteen Writers on the Decision Not to Have Kids, the author explores the choice (sometimes, other times accident, and still other times incredible struggle) to have a child. “It is funny to think about this careful, logical thinking in light of my current situation, standing next to the freezer and eating chocolate chips by the handful because I cannot stand to hear the baby cry," writes Prushinskaya. "Did I choose this particular situation?”
afirepages's review
2.0
The writing failed to grab my attention from the very beginning, which made it hard for me to focus while listening to its audiobook and while also reading the ebook for some parts. This was mostly boring and I just wanted this to be over. I liked some of the ideas and knowing more about the author's personal experiences, and found some thoughts interesting - especially when talking about how it's like for first-time mothers. But a lot of the topics of the essays could have been further explored. Some might still enjoy this, but this is just okay for me.
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