Reviews with content warning for Emotional abuse - Don't Call It a Cult: The Shocking Story of Keith Raniere and the Women of NXIVM

Reviews tagging 'Emotional abuse'

Don't Call It a Cult: The Shocking Story of Keith Raniere and the Women of NXIVM by Sarah Berman

29 reviews

kimia_hyperfocuser's review

challenging dark informative reflective sad fast-paced

4.5

Informative and comprehensive. Sarah Berman interviewed several people who I hadn't heard of before directly in the two documentaries and two other books I read on this case. And she procides details I found crucial in the story of the mexican sisters.

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annieliz's review

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4.0

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miblette's review against another edition

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challenging dark emotional informative medium-paced

4.0

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robinwritesallthethings's review against another edition

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dark hopeful informative reflective sad tense medium-paced

5.0

What It’s About: This book covers the rise and fall of the cult NXIVM. You may have heard of NXIVM already, since it was the subject of the documentary The Vow on HBO. I watched that first and then picked up this book because of it.

Plot: NXIVM is a fascinating and terrifying study of human behavior and how it can be manipulated on an extreme level. For those who are familiar with narcissists, a lot of the events in this book probably won’t be terribly surprising, but for those who aren’t, they’ll definitely learn how to spot one in the future, and I think that’s one of the big selling points of books like this. As it should be, the focus is on the victims and how they are continuing to recover from the ordeals they suffered. The story starts with the history leading to the creation of the cult and ends with the cult leader’s trial, so the narrative is complete.

Research and Organization: There’s a lot of research here, and it’s organized and sourced well. Berman did a lot of legwork and conducted a lot of interviews to make sure she had the full story. I also appreciate that she explained the various techniques the cult used to prey on its victims, which makes a big difference to understanding how so many clearly intelligent people could buy into the organization.

Trigger Warnings: Obviously, there’s a lot of abuse of several varieties present in this book. Emotional and sexual abuse are probably the biggest ones. Some of these abuses are against minors as well.

Final Thoughts: I wasn’t sure this book was going to provide any new information after watching The Vow, but I felt like it did. It also presented everything in a more chronological order, which made it easy to follow. The ending felt a little rushed to me, perhaps, but I did read the last half of the book in one sitting, so that might have been why. I didn’t reduce my rating because of it since, ultimately, I feel like the book accomplished its goal of explaining how a group like NXIVM became what it was. If you can handle reading about the terrible things that happened, it’s an illuminating story.

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siobhanward's review against another edition

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3.5

This book is hard to rate because while it was well-written and in-depth, the topic itself was so gruesome that it was hard to get through. I knew almost nothing about NXIVM (I thought it was called "nuh-vix-um" this whole time), but it was so much worse than I could have expected. I have a fairly strong stomach and have done a fair amount of reading about cults, but this one was so bad that I had to take breaks fairly often. Please, please check triggers before reading this one! Overall, it was well-researched but honestly I think it went too in-depth at times. I think sometimes Berman went so deep into people's stories that I found myself lost and trying to figure out who was who and what was happening.

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kellylynnthomas's review

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challenging dark emotional informative tense medium-paced

4.5

This book is W I L D. At times I did find it a little difficult to follow all the names (I was listening to the audiobook), but eventually I settled into the story. And what a story! I had been aware of NXIVM and that it had been broken up, but I had no idea how truly awful things were for the women who were coerced into joining. Well worth a read, but be aware of the trigger warnings; the book is full of sexual abuse and worse.

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cotalf92's review against another edition

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3.0

Solid retelling of the progression of Keith Raniere’s control over NXIVM members. While the author covers many details and people involved with NXIVM, the story line is relatively easy to follow while listening to the audiobook.

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lizmarasse's review

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4.0

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applesodaperson's review

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dark informative tense fast-paced

4.5

This was definitely the most perfect true crime book I have ever read. I have listened to to true crime Youtubers and pocasts for years, and I loved how this book felt like listening to a true crime podcast. I liked how it went in chronological order (for the most part), because it made it very easy to follow and understand. This is something that I really don't think I'll Be Gone In The Dark did well, which is another true crime book I have read. That book left me feeling so confused about the timeline despite the fact that I was already familiar with that true crime case.
I also really liked how easy it was to remember who was who. The author repeated full names a lot, and gave context if it had been a while since they were mentioned, which made it really easy to keep track of all the people in this story.
I loved how over and over again, the pattern of people being coerced into the cult until they were too far in was highlighted. It really showed how exploitative Keith Raniere was, and showed how people got roped into doing crazy and horrible things for the cult.
Plus I just learning about cults and cult psychology in general, so this book was right up my alley. I think it was really well done and interesting. Overall, Keith Reniere sucks and is an absolutely terrible person.
Listened to on Libby.

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moonyreadsbystarlight's review

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challenging emotional informative reflective tense

4.25

What does it take to make a self improvement curriculum into a cult with an even more sick cult inside of it? It starts with one man with too much stock in a sketchy self-administered IQ test and an obsession with psychogical manipulation, MLMs, and Ayn Rand, but couldn't be realized without an intense social network.

The writing itself is very engaging and this is thoroughly researched. There was intense background on Raniere along with the full scope of his network and how it grew, but Berman also interviewed many women who were in NXIVM and used information from the court case to show their stories.

The events of what happened are truely wild. At a few points, I had to take a break from it and even considered stopping about 3/4 of the way in because as horrid as things had been at that point, there were a few really intense experiences that they went into. But I'm glad I did finish it. I didn't plan it this way, but I think this was a good bridge from Hey Hun by Emily Lynn Paulson into some of the books on Scientology that are on my TBR (yes, Raniere was clearly inspired by both Amway and L Ron Hubbard, though he denies clearly being inspired by dianetics).

If you're interested in cults or social psychology (and are ready for the sort of content that is present when talking about such awful groups), I would definitely recommend this.

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